Matt’s Revenge

It was a bright and crisp morning, and for once, I was not heading to work at Jenny Downs Department store. I had called in sick for the day off. It was a lie, but I did not want my boss Gregory to know I was starting to look for other jobs in the area and today was my first interview at a sandwich-making business much closer to home called Wrap Happy.

I had heard many good stories that they treated their employees well, and when they had a job opening, I called down for an interview. I wasn’t happy with where I was at with Gregory and feeling like the wrong slip up could lead to me being fired without pay.

I was still five minutes out of the store and about fifteen minutes before my interview. I wanted to work on what I would say before I would go in. I had been a good three years since I had an interview for a job, and I was a bundle of nerves.

Soon I came to a stop in a small parking lot behind the Wrap Happy store. It was on the corner of a busy street heading into town. I was a bit worried that I would have to work harder than my Jenny Downs experience, but it would be the price to pay to get away from Gregory.

Putting the vehicle into the park, I started to think about what possible questions could be asked.  How well do you work with others? What are your strengths and weakness?

I shook my head, working on my hair for the fourth time since waking up. I hated those types of questions. It felt weird to talk about myself in such a way.

I reached into the glove box where I had stashed a power bar and unwrapped it. I took a few bites out of it to try and calm my nerves.  It will be ok, Sarah. You will get this job, and things will start to move forward in your life again. Just calm down.

Taking a few deep breaths, I wrapped the bar back up and stepped out of the car. I walked around the building to the front entrance. There were a few other businesses here as the Wrap Happy store was in a small shopping complex. I passed a laundry mat and gas station, both of which were already busy for eight in the morning.

When I came in front of the sandwich shop, I found a closed sign in the window. I scratched at my head. “I swore today was the day that they told me to come down for my interview. Why would they be closed in the middle of the week?”

I saw a middle-aged man with a baseball cap sweeping in the middle of the store, and I tapped on the window. “Hey.”

He continued with his work for a few more seconds before coming over to the glass door and pointing to the sign. I narrowed my eyes. “I came here for an interview today. Let me in.”

The man sighed and opened the door. “Hey lady, will you stop before. . .”

“I said I am here for an interview.”

“Oh. You do know you were supposed to call and let us know you were coming right so we could let you in.”

I blinked. “I wasn’t told that on the phone when I was told to come down here.”

“Well, either way, Terry will be with you after his current person. If you come in and sit and sit down, please.” The man locked the door behind me. “The sooner the interviews are done with, the sooner we can open for the day.”

“How many more after me if I may ask. I am wondering how much competition I have for my position.”

“Two more this morning, but there were five people ahead of you. I wouldn’t get your hopes up.” The man went back to sweeping.

So far, I don’t understand why this place is much better than in my last workplace. If I do get the job, I hope I don’t have to deal much with grumpy guss over there too much.

I tapped my feet on the ground as the minutes passed, biting at the side of my lip.  Seven other people trying for this job? How am I going to get the position? I don’t want to be stuck with Gregory forever.

I looked around to try and take my mind off of the impending interview. There was a black and white tiled floor and red ceiling with a not currently spinning fan. Across the room, I could see the work station I would be working at, which was presently dark and vacant, vegetables and meat covered up with plastic wrap behind a glass counter. Near the checkout was a small cabinet with a collection of cookies and right beside that a stand with Fredrick’s Fancy Sparkling water. I sighed.  His products are turning up everywhere now.

My cell phone suddenly rang. The worker across the room jumped and looked at me before saying, “Turn that off, will you?”

I nodded before reaching inside my purse to silence the device. Before I did, I made sure to see who it was from.  Matt? Why would he be calling me? I broke up with him.  I declined the call and turned my phone on vibrate. Whatever he had to say, it could wait. I slid my phone into my pocket and put my purse back onto the floor.

I went back to mindlessly, tapping my fingers on my knees. How much longer until it was my turn? Let my agony end.

Suddenly my phone vibrated, causing me to jump. I reached down into my pocket to see what was going on. Turning the device on, I noticed I had a text from Matt. Aggravated, I checked what it was.

Sarah. I know you are trying to get an interview with a new job today, so I sent a surprise as payback for stranding me in the middle of nowhere.

I scratched my head. What was he talking about, and how did he know I would have an interview today at Wrap Happy. What is this surprise he is talking about?

Before I could think about it more, the door to the back room opened, and a young man walked out in a suit and jacket. As I watched him walk by, flipping his black hair, I suddenly thought about how I had come underdressed. I looked down at my grey short shirt and dress pants and wished I could go home and change. It was too late now.

Once he left the building, a man in his late sixties came out of the backroom, dressed in an overcoat. He had auburn hair green eyes hidden behind square glasses that he was adjusting as he looked around the room. “Sarah Collingsworth? Are you here?”

I stood up. “Yes.”

“I am ready for you now if you will come back here.” He turned around and walked back inside the room. I stood up, dusted myself off, and followed him inside. We passed through a storage room and into a back office. The elderly man then turned around and shook my hand.

“Hello. My name is Terry. If you have a seat, I will be right back. I have some papers to get. Just let me squeeze past you.” I pressed against the wall as the room was barely wide enough for the two of us.

Once Terry was gone, I popped down into the padded chair and looked around. The wooden desk was tidy, and there was an air container behind Terry’s desk, blowing a nice breeze in my face. The walls were a yucky brown color but soft and padded. Despite the small space, it was a more superior officer then Gregory's dreary abode.

I stretched out.  I am finally going to get this over with.  For the first time today, I felt calm.  Soon I can get on with my day.

Despite my calm feeling, I felt pressure starting to build in my waist. I looked down at a slightly swollen belly. What a time to bloat.  I put my hand on my chest, not acting the floaty feel. Not wanting this new complication to ruin the interview, I sucked in my gut and tucked my shit further under my belt.

I shifted my weight in the chair and sighed. I was starting to get a weird feeling that I was filling up with air. I tapped my fingers on the chair’s armrest, trying to figure out just why I would feel this way. I hadn’t had any Fredrick’s Fancy products today; there wasn’t a reason to right before my interview.  Maybe I am more stressed than I thought?

As the minutes passed, my clothing became tight; I shifted in my seat, uncomfortably as the airy feeling continued to build. I could also feel similar pressure starting to build in my thighs.  What is going on?

Before I could figure it out, my belt snapped, causing my waist to expand in a sudden explosion. I was pushed forward as my midsection doubled in size and became wedged into the arms of the chair. “Oh, crap. Why is this happening?”

I had a new problem as well. I started to lift out of the chair. If it wasn’t for my round waist growing into the chair, I would be lifting off the ground.  This isn’t good. I am blowing up like a balloon.

I looked at my thighs, and they looked like big tubes and were becoming hard to keep from floating up. I had to keep my hands on my legs to prevent them from flying upwards. “Is this what Matt meant by he was going to get revenge on me? That jerk wanted to ruin my interview by making me expand like a balloon. He is going to pay for this.”

My legs were starting to become squishy from all of the air filling up inside of them. Not only was that, but the magical air staring to travel down from my thighs to my ankles and feet. I tried to reach down to keep my legs from rising but was finding it hard to bend over as my chest became puffy; I felt like a marshmallow.

The chair groaned as my rear end continued to expand outward. I knew sooner or later, I would end up breaking it and float away. I waved my arms around, hoping that there was something I could do before the inevitable. Suddenly I could hear voices in the hallway from behind me. I twisted around, my body squeaking as I did so.

“Dammit, Andrew. I told you to keep those files where we can find them.”

“Sorry, Terry.”

“Let’s hurry up and find them. I have two more interviews tonight.”

I sighed. It didn’t seem like Terry would be in immediately.  I have some hope that he won’t see this happening to me.

I was trying to figure out what I was going to do. My legs were lifted up, no longer able to be held down until they were at a ninety-degree angle from the floor. I put my hands on them and sighed. “This is going well.”

As I brushed my legs, my arms started to puff out.

I sighed as air moved from my shoulders down to my hands and quickly inflated my arms, my fingers becoming round and hard to bend. I let my tubby arms fall to my sides, only for them to start to float upwards. “I am glad this chair is holding me down.”

Suddenly the chair broke apart, unable to contain my expanding body. My midsection started to take on a more spherical appearance now as I quickly rose up towards the ceiling and hit it a few moments later. “Oww.”

I tried to push myself down, but I was just too floaty. Thankfully my body had stopped inflating, so there was one problem solved for the moment. Still, I was stuck, bouncing on the ceiling of the person I had gone to get an interview from, my body massively inflated. I tried to push myself to face the floor, but the effort to try and flip myself was too much. There was no way I was going to get a job.  If I ever see Matt again, he is going to pay for this.

I heard voices outside the doorway again. “I found the files, Andrew. You can go back to your sweeping.” Then the door swung open. “What the hell? Where did she go? And what did she do to my chair?”

I didn’t know if I should say something and let him see me just above his head or wait and try and sneak out later; either way, I was going to have some explaining to do.

Still, I would probably be in more hot water if he found me trying to sneak out after I deflated.

“I am up here.”

After a moment, I heard Terry cry out. “What in the living hell?”

“Can you turn me over so I am not looking at your ceiling?”

After a moment, I felt a hand pull at my leg, and I was forced into a mid-air roll, one that I could not stop, flipping over and over again until Terry reached up and grabbed me, letting me slowly rise back up to the ceiling.

“What is this? A joke? A prank? I am not laughing. You are going to pay me for the chair you broke. Double even.”

I shook my head, trying to shake away the stars from my vision. “It wasn’t intentional. I promise that.”

“How does something like this even happen?”

“Umm, can you get past you freaking out and on to if the interview is still on or not.”

Terry narrowed his eyes. I worried I had been a bit too direct. He sighed, went to close the door before sitting down in his chair. He then took a full minute before speaking again. “I will say this is very unorthodox. I would just like to say a flat out no and be done with this. You broke my chair. But it is our code here not to turn people away for, ahem, any disability. And I sure don’t want my superiors to know that I turned someone down just because they had an umm. . . I don’t know what to call this, but I just don’t want to have the chance to be sued.”

I rolled my eyes. “Ok. Then let’s get this started. I would like to get out of here as much as you.”

“Ok, so have you ever done work like this before?”

“No. This would be my first time working with food.”

“Have you had a job before?”

“Yes. As a sales clerk at the Jenny Downs Department Store.”

Terry’s eyebrow raised as I mentioned my current place of employment. “Do you have your own vehicle?”

“What do you mean? I thought this job was only to make sandwiches on site.”

“Well, sometimes, you would have to fill in for delivery, and we don’t have a company car.”

“I do.”

“Ok, then. What are your strengths and weaknesses?”

“You mean besides being a human balloon in your office?”

“Humph.”

I sighed. “I would say my strength is I am good with people and weakness is I can be a bit lazy.”

Terry put his hands onto his desk. “Ok then, that is all I have. I will call you later on. You can leave.”

“One problem.”

He looked up at me with an arched eyebrow.

“And what is that?”

“I can’t do anything, but float, remember.”

“Ugh. Wait right there. I am going to go find something sharp and pop you. I am sick of this.”

“Hey, wait.” But Terry had already rushed off. I tried to keep calm. What would happen if he popped me? Would I just return to normal, or would the action actually hurt me? I just knew I didn’t want to give him the chance to find out. I tried to push myself off the ceiling to attempt to float out of the room but moving my tubby limbs proved too tricky.  What am I going to do?

A few moments later, Terry had returned with a massive fork from another part of the store. “Well, I hope this does the trick. This usually hangs up as decoration, but I think it will be enough to end this madness.”

“Can we talk about this?”

“No.”

Terry pressed the metal tips of the fork against my body and attempted to pop me. I felt all of the air rush to my head and feet as the fork pressed deeper and deeper.  Too much pressure.  But despite the jagged metal pressing against me, I did not explode. Terry became more and more frustrated the longer I held together.

“Dammit, why won’t you just deflate already?”

Suddenly I slipped out from the forks jaws, flying down towards the floor with alarming speed. When I hit the floor, I bounced off and rocketed up towards Terry, who used the giant fork like a bat, striking me and sending me flying into the door where I became wedged; my torso in the hallway and my rear end in the office.

“Help me. I am stuck.”

“Ugh.” I felt Terry’s boot strike me before I went flying out into the hallway, bouncing around. I was starting to get sick; I was on a rollercoaster ride that I couldn’t stop. Thankfully though, I was still inside. If I managed to bounce my way outside, I could end up floating my way up into the air with no way down until this change reversed itself.

“Stop bouncing around. I am trying to get you out the damn door.”

“Wait, no. I don’t want to. . .” I threw up a bit in my mouth as I bounced my way into the main store area, knocking over the register as I floated to the ceiling. Andrew looked over after he heard the register crash to the floor and cried out. “What in the world?”

Terry walked up to him as he tried to reach up and swat at me. “Don’t ask. Just don’t let anyone inside into we get this taken care of. I don’t want us being on the news for a human air balloon.”

Andrew scratched at his chin. “Hmm. I thought she looked a bit familiar. Aren’t you the lady from those Fredrick’s Fancy commercials?”

I narrowed my eyes. “Yes.”

“I knew it. I had my suspicions before, but now that I see you all. . . Well. I mean, it's not every day you see something like this.”

“Ya, ya.”

Terry sighed. “Will you stop gawking and get a ladder. We have to get her outside before the next person arrives for their interview.”

“Why?”

“Because I don’t want her to scare anyone off, that is why. This is just too weird.” Terry walked to the door. “I am going to keep an eye out for the next person who is supposed to arrive. You just get her down and out of the store or find a way to deflate her. I don’t care.” He slammed the door behind him.

I sighed.  I guess working here means no Fredrick’s Fancy fun or mishaps at work, or I would freak out my new boss. If I even get the job. I am not sure I will after how this interview is going.

Andrew looked up at me. “Well, this is an interesting day. I will say that. I will talk to Terry after this and see if this incident doesn’t impact you getting your job here. He is just a bit cranky after trying to quit drinking. I think it would be cool to work with the face of Fredrick’s Fancy products myself.” He started to walk off. “I will get that ladder.”

“Hey, don’t send me outside just yet.”

“Why not?”

“I am scared I will float away.”

“Oh. Well, I can move you into the storage room. How long does this last?”

I gave the best shrug I could. “Depends. It could be another few minutes or hours. But I just don’t want to be high enough when I turn back to normal that I could hurt myself falling back down to the ground.”

“Oh, wow, that is a problem. Well, I can’t have my boss see you again. Hmm. How about I stuff you inside the storage closet.”

“Which one?”

Andrew pointed to a tiny room in the corner of the room, packed to the brim with cleaning supplies and a ladder. “There is no way I am going to fit in there in my current condition. Are you crazy?”

“Well, the only other option is I get a rope and tie you up out back.”

I narrowed my eyes as I tried to think. Both options didn’t seem that good, one where I would be crapped beyond belief and the other I would be at the mercy of the wind, and the town might see me in yet another embarrassing situation. Still, I could live with people laughing at me over being stuck inside a small room when I was the size of a blimp.

“I will take the outside option.”

“Ok. Just wait there while I get some rope and a ladder.”

I shrugged. “It isn’t like I can do anything else.” I watched as Andrew vanished inside the storage room. I did hope that I would turn back to normal soon. I was starting to miss the sensation of my feet on the ground. For the most part, I enjoyed Fredrick’s Fancy transformations, but this was just a bit too much.

Andrew returned, dragging a ladder along. “I will help you out of here in no time.

Just you see.”

As he set the ladder next to me, I started to get a funny feeling, like the air inside me was beginning to move around. I began to feel heavy. I looked at my arms, and flabbiness was starting to go down. “I am finally starting to return to normal.”

My body deflated with ever-increasing speed; it was as if someone had pulled a plug holding in all the air inside of me. I started to descent to the floor as my body became more and more human-like. I was able to move my arms and legs once more in their full directions as I hit the floor.

Andrew sighed. “Well, I guess that is over. I will do my best to make sure this craziness doesn’t keep you from actually getting your job.”

I stood up, trying to straighten out my stretched out clothing. “Thank you.

Have a nice day.”

“You too. Sorry I was so short before.”

Terry walked back inside. “You are still here? And back to being umm normal? Well, go already. Before you inflate again. And if you do pick up a sign and promote for us.” He walked into his office. “What is this world coming to? Inflating people. Giant women commercials. What is next?”

I sighed. Terry would just swell to work with. Still better than Gregory, who wants to use me and my size changing for profit.

I walked to the door before looking back at Andrew. “Well, it was a pleasure. Have a nice day.” I walked out the door. I was happy that the craziness was behind me now. I hope that Andrew would help persuade Terry to ignore my inflation for my job at Wrap Happy. I still wanted a chance to work there. But if I had to find work elsewhere, I would. Anything to get away from Gregory.

I would also have to keep an eye out for Matt. It seems like he wasn’t happy for me stranding him out in the middle of nowhere, and this may not be the last of his revenge. But for now, at least I was done with any Frederick's Fancy fun for today.