TF (imprinting; phone, panties etc)

Sophie sighed. Her girlfriend Louise was sulking. And, going by the empty bottle of imprinting potion on the coffee table, she could be sulking anywhere.

Was she that vase? That chair? Even that window? Louise was getting more and more inventive with her imprinting lately and Sophie was finding it hard to keep up.

Sophie turned and addressed the living room in general.

“Lou, I’m sorry I yelled at you. It was just … I mean, I know you said you wanted to get into my pants, but I thought you meant something completely different. So when I was on the bus, and my panties started talking to me, I freaked out. I said some things I probably shouldn’t have, and I apologise.”

“Really?”

Louise’s voice came booming out of nowhere.

“Really, Lou. You know I love you … where the heck are you? Or better, what the heck are you?”

A giggle. “I’m your apartment!”

“Wait … the whole thing???”

“Yup!” And a huge face appeared on the ceiling.

“Yeargh!” Sophie jumped. Well, you try having two eyes the size of your head staring at you.

“God, Lou, can you downsize a bit? This is a little creepy. It’s making me feel like a lab rat.”

“Sure!” The face vanished and a second later Louise rose out of the floor. As was usual with imprinting, she seemed to be made of floorboards until she stepped out of the floor altogether, when she reverted to flesh.

“I’m sorry too, Soph,” she said as the girls embraced. “I should have told you my plan. But, well, you know I’m not working lately, and I’ve been getting bored at home, so I thought it would be fun to go to work with you.”

“As panties? I don’t think you thought that out very well, Lou.”

“Yeah, I figured that out when you kept sitting on me.” Louise giggled. “Not that that wasn’t nice … but I promise I won’t do that again. Forgive me?”

“Aw, of course  I do.” And Sophie leant in for a kiss.

“Now Soph, what about you take some imprinting potion too? Because I’m in the mood for a long hot bath …”

“Sounds great. But I get to be the water!”

“Oh, you always want to be on top …”

*

Sophie woke up a bit later than usual, deciding to skip her yoga class. Louise was fast asleep as she got up and headed for the bathroom.

After her shower she dressed quickly, hesitating as she passed the bedroom door. Should she wake Louise up to say goodbye? Nah, let her sleep. Sophie grabbed her phone and keys, shoved them in her bag, then made for the door.

One quick bagel and coffee later, she was on the bus headed downtown, and pulled out her phone to catch up on Instagram.

That’s funny, she thought, I can’t remember making a picture of Lou my lock screen. She swiped, to find a different photo of Louise as her home screen.

Oh, she’s changed my phone pics to ones of her. That’s really cute … and kind of annoying, too … which, come to think of it, pretty much sums her up …

And then her phone spoke to her.

“Hi honey, I love you,” it said in the flat, robotic tones of Siri.

She’s even programmed my phone to speak! Or … hang on … oh no … she wouldn’t …

“I am your girlfriend and I want a kiss,” the phone said.

She had.

“Louise!” Sophie hissed, thanking God she was sitting up the back by herself. “Are you in my phone???”

“Hee hee. Yes I am. Now I can be at work with you all day.”

“I thought you promised me you wouldn’t do that!”

“No. I promised I would not be your panties on the bus. And I am not.”

People started turning their heads to look.

“Get out now!” Sophie hissed as quietly as she could.

“That would be problematic. You see, I did not have time to put on clothes.”

Great. Not only was Louise her phone, she was a naked phone.

“Kiss me honey. Swipe my screen. It feels so good.”

“Louise, don’t take this personally, but …” And Sophie dialled down the volume to zero. She frantically searched in her bag for headphones before Louise could turn herself up again.

Oh God, she thought, I hope she hasn’t got into all the apps.

*

She’d got into all the apps.

When Sophie checked Instagram, she found nothing but photos of Louise standing next to celebrities. And since Louise happened to be naked, well, it made Sophie feel very uncomfortable.

Louise! You’re flashing Grace Helbig and Mamrie Hart!

Louise was also in her Music, singing along to Tegan and Sara.

And all over her Facebook and Twitter.

Most disturbingly, she was in her Yummly. Seeing her girlfriend as a quick and easy way with chicken was totally freaky.

Well, there was an easy way to deal with the situation.

She left her phone in her bag.



She held out until 2pm.

Damn it, she could do without all those other apps, but she needed to check DeviantArt, and her company frowned on doing so on her work computer, so …

For a second she thought optimistically that maybe Louise hadn’t colonised DA as well.

Then she flicked to Undiscovered, to find all the pictures were of Louise.

Here was a photo of Louise. Here was an illustration of Louise. Here was a drawing of a stick figure with boobs and, yes, it was Louise.

And in all of them she was naked.

“Louise! Not safe for work!”

“Oops. Sorry.” And all the pictures changed to close-up head shots.

Oh, that’s Louise as a catgirl … wait, what am I doing?!

Sophie closed the app and stared at her girlfriend. “Louise, if you are not careful I will simply switch the phone off, and then who knows where you’ll be?”

“No. Stop, Dave. My mind is going …”

“Argh!”

“Sophie, are you screaming at your phone?”

Sophie spun around in her chair, frantically thinking of some excuse, to find Jonelle.

Her friend Jonelle. Her platonic work wife Jonelle. Jonelle, the friend who used transformation potions too.

“Jonelle! Thank God! It’s my phone! It’s Louise!”

Jonelle frowned. “What did Louise do to your phone?”

“No! She IS the phone!”

Thank heavens, with Jonelle there was no need for long-winded explanations. “Oh, your girl is all up in your phone? She doing crazy shit with imprinting potions again?”

“That’s about the size of it.”

Jonelle waved at the phone. “Hey, Lou. How you doing in there?”

Siri droned again. “Hello Jonelle. It is nice to see you again. How is Lauren?”

“Oh, she’s doing fine. Lou, why don’t you get out of your girlfriend’s phone?”

“I am not wearing any clothes.”

Jonelle threw an amused look Sophie’s way. “Honey, you didn’t plan this thing very well.”

“No I did not. I realise that now. That is something a lot of people have been saying to me lately.”

Jonelle began to giggle.

“Jon!” Sophie said. “This isn’t funny!” But she began to giggle even as she said it.

Soon tears were streaming down the women’s faces.

“Ah-hah! You got a naked girl in your phone, Soph! How fun is that!”

“Bwah-ha-ha! Oh God, and she was standing next to Kim Kardashian!”

“Ha ha,” the phone droned matter of factly. “Ha ha hee hee.”

Jonelle wiped the tears away. “Sophie, I think you better get your girl home. She’s starting to sound like the phone. Just duck out now. I’ll cover for you.”

“Thanks Jon,” Sophie said gratefully, dumping Louise in her bag. “I really appreciate this.”

“Oh, you can repay me by telling me how you’ll get your revenge.”

Sophie smiled wickedly. “I’ve already thought of it.”

*

Louise was naked.

And running.

She leaped over a rock. She grabbed a rope that appeared out of nowhere and swung over a chasm. She ducked her head as she slid under a bridge.

And then she was in a cart, careering through a cave along a train track.

And then she was running on a tiny plank suspended thousands of feet in the sky.

“Yow!” she screamed.

“Hey, don’t blame me,” Sophie said as she flicked the screen, sending Louise leaping over a fire. “You got into the app in the first place. And babe, I’m sorry, but this game ends with you falling over a cliff at some point.”

Words flashed up on the screen.

“Hey, high score!”

Sophie settled back in the bus. Ah, Temple Run, I should play you more often. Particularly when Lou is doing the running …