(BBW = Big, Beautiful Woman)
Ryan and Raven have lived next door to each other their entire lives and were best friends as children, but when they reached adolescence, their lives went in different directions and they drifted apart. Now in their early 20s, Raven, once a chubby girl and now a BBW (big, beautiful woman), has had her life come crashing down around her, but Ryan's there to see her through it.
Mature themes in Part 2 include petting (erotic touching), frank discussion of sex, and mild profanity.
Part 2 includes the following chapters:
Chapter 5: Uncharted territory
Chapter 4: Together at last
Several days later, Raven was out on her front swing, hoping Ryan would see her and join her. After a while, he returned home from his classes, and made a point of looking to see if she was out on the swing. She was, and she waved for him to come, and so he walked over. “How’re you doing, Raven?” he asked.
“Pretty good,” she replied. “Got a few minutes to join me?” she asked as she patted the spot next to her on the swing. Ryan nodded affirmatively and sat down. She immediately grabbed his hand and held it tight with both of hers. Then she turned so that she could look him in the eyes. “I need to talk to you, Ryan. It’s only been since I was attacked that I’ve come to appreciate how priceless a true friend is. You’ve opened my eyes to that. In all the relationships I’ve had, I’ve never thought of my boyfriends as friends, too, and in hindsight, they weren’t. You see where that got me. But over these past several months, it’s dawned on me that there’s no reason why one person can’t be both. Actually, there’s every reason why one person should be both. I’ve come to realize what a wonderful guy you are, and I’ll confess I’ve developed feelings for you as more than just a friend. I felt like I needed to put that out there. So, I have to know, do you think of me as more than a friend? And if you don’t, do you think you ever could?”
Ryan just looked at her and swallowed hard. Wow, she’s really laying it all on the line, he thought to himself. He took a few seconds to try to gather his thoughts. “Raven, I’ve been in love with you ever since we were little kids. Remember when we used to play house and pretend we were married? Even back then I really wanted that to come true someday. When we drifted apart and our lives went in different directions, I figured that that was just a childish dream that would never happen for real. But all these years, I’ve never stopped loving you.” Ryan could see that Raven was getting choked up hearing these words, and a tear started running down her cheek.
Ryan wasn’t done speaking yet, but Raven interjected. “For the first time in my life, I think I finally understand what it feels like to be truly loved by somebody, unconditionally. I mean, not counting my own family. And now that I do, I don’t ever want to lose that feeling again.”
Ryan continued. “I’ve loved every minute of getting to know you again over these past months. I mean I hate what happened to you, but I love being a part of your life again. At first I was just trying to be a good friend when you clearly needed one, but I’ve developed feelings for you as well. Strong feelings. I’ve kept them to myself, though, for several reasons. One, because I didn’t want you to think I had ulterior motives. Two, because I didn’t want things to get weird between us. Three, because I figured that once you recovered and didn’t need me anymore, everything would go back to the way it was. I thought maybe if you didn’t know, it wouldn’t hurt as much when it ended.”
Raven was openly crying now. “I’m so sorry that you thought I wouldn’t need you anymore. This whole experience has convinced me how much I do need you! How much I’ve always needed you! I was just too stupid to realize it until now.” She wrapped her arms around Ryan and held onto him for dear life as she said through her tears, “I’m so sorry! I’m so sorry! I’m so sorry!”, and then she just sobbed and sobbed. Ryan held on just as tight as tears streamed down his face, too.
After a while, Raven ran out of tears and stopped crying. She then immediately began French kissing Ryan with every ounce of passion she could muster. However, it wasn’t just her kissing him; it was entirely mutual and it went on for quite a while. Eventually, Ryan worked up his nerve and began caressing her breast. Raven pulled his hand away and gently smacked it while continuing to kiss him. “Not yet. I’m still trying to keep from lactating. But soon, I promise,” she told him.
Chapter 5: Uncharted territory
Neither Raven nor Ryan saw the need to verbally make their relationship official. It went without saying that they were now a couple. They both without hesitation referred to the other as “my boyfriend” or “my girlfriend”. Both felt extremely lucky to be in a relationship with each other. Raven, because she knew for the first time in her life that she had a boyfriend who truly loved her unconditionally. Ryan, because the girl he always wanted but could never have was finally his, and wholeheartedly so.
Raven’s parents were thrilled that the two of them were now together. They had always thought very highly of Ryan, and knew that their daughter couldn’t find a better man if she tried. Ryan’s parents were less enthused, although they tried not to show it. They knew all about Raven’s bad girl reputation and were concerned that she’d somehow corrupt their clean-cut son. But they also knew how much Ryan had always wanted a relationship with Raven, and that indicating their disapproval would only be counterproductive. The big question in their minds was whether Ryan would be a positive influence on Raven more or less than she would be a negative influence on him.
Ryan and Raven were together almost every chance they could get, either when other family members were around or when they weren’t. When they weren’t, the two couldn’t keep their hands off each other. After a couple of weeks, as promised, Raven gave Ryan unfettered access to her boobs. Ryan loved how huge they had gotten, either from pregnancy or weight gain or a combination of the two. He hoped they stayed that way. Raven loved how Ryan seemed to try to pleasure her via her breasts, and not just himself.
At first, sex was off the table due to Raven’s recent pregnancy. After a month, though, that was no longer a factor. That became the first issue the two of them would have to talk through to resolve. Ryan knew that Raven had been sexually active for a good number of years, with many different partners. But he was still a virgin. That left him conflicted; he was eager to lose his virginity with her, and he figured she wouldn’t put up a fight, but he also knew he would likely be a complete noob and embarrass himself.
Raven, on the other hand, knew Ryan was a virgin and respected him for that. She was very cognizant that Ryan was very different from any of her past boyfriends or hookups, and this relationship was like none she’d ever had. She didn’t want to slip into her old ways just out of habit. A different kind of guy and a different kind of relationship meant she needed a different approach, one that would work for this guy and this relationship. She didn’t know exactly what that was yet, but they’d figure it out together.
And so, during one of their make-out sessions, Ryan began to awkwardly try to unfasten the top button and pull down the zipper on her jeans. She stopped him. “I think we need to talk about this first,” she told him. She knew she was killing the mood, but it needed to be done. “I know you think I must be easy, and you’re not wrong, but I don’t think we should rush into it. I don’t want our relationship to be like the ones I’ve had in the past. I want it to be better that that. I want us to be intimate only when it’s the right time for us, not at the first chance we get whether we’re ready for it or not.”
Ryan was quite surprised that she would try to stop him. He tried to be macho. “I’m ready right now,” he said.
“No, you just want it now. You’re not ready yet. We’re not ready yet. Trust me on this. It’ll be a lot more special for both of us when we really are ready.” Ryan wanted to know when that would be. “I don’t know. But we’ll both know it when the time comes.”
Ryan was disappointed but also relieved at the same time. He realized it could have easily gone badly any number of ways if they had continued. He didn’t even have a condom.
Raven hadn’t told Ryan this, but she wasn’t ready for sex yet herself. Raven had always been overweight, and had always been self-conscious about it. She had a love-hate relationship with food. She was constantly starting – and then failing at – new diets. Raven had stopped trying to diet during her pregnancy, and as a result had gained a lot more weight that she was supposed to. She was quite a bit heavier than she had ever been prior to getting pregnant, now tipping the scale at about 245 pounds. She felt fat and unattractive. She managed to keep her H-cup pregnancy boobs, but she wasn’t sure if that was good or bad. Raven knew she would need to feel good about herself before she could enjoy being intimate with Ryan.
But she also remembered how he looked at her when she was both fat and very pregnant. He clearly liked what he saw. She needed a better idea of what was going through his head, but that would have to be a conversation for another day.
A couple of days later they were on the front swing again. Raven said to Ryan, “There’s something I failed to mention the other night that I want to get off my chest. It wasn’t just you or us that wasn’t ready for sex. I’m not ready either, and by that I mean I’m not psychologically ready.” Ryan just looked at her, not knowing how to respond. Raven continued. “I’ve always struggled with my weight, and I’m self-conscious about it. I gained a lot of weight during my pregnancy and I’m much fatter now than I ever was pre-pregnancy. I feel very unattractive and very unsexy right now, and feeling that way, I know I won’t be able to enjoy myself. In fact, I’m having a hard time even fathoming what you see in me.”
Ryan replied. “I don’t think you’re unattractive or unsexy at all. Just the opposite, in fact. You’re a BBW, and you’re just my type.” It was clear from her reaction that she had no idea what he was talking about. “BBW stands for big, beautiful woman. In other words, big and beautiful are not mutually exclusive. I have a confession of my own to make. I’ve always had a thing for big girls. Maybe that’s because I’ve always been attracted to you, or maybe it’s vice-versa; I don’t know. I know the girls I dated in high school weren’t big, but I was in denial about it back then. Now I’m out of the closet about it. I’m proud to be in a relationship with you, and I don’t care what anyone else thinks about your size, or what anyone thinks about me dating someone your size.
“Let me make this as clear as I can for you,” Ryan continued. “I’ll love you no matter what size you are, but I’m glad you’re as big you are, because it turns me on. I’m in heaven playing with you big, fat boobs, and watching your big, round ass and thick thighs as you walk away is to die for. You haven’t really let me see your belly since you gave birth, but I can imagine it’s big and jiggly, too. I think you’re hot the way you are, and I want you to be able to accept that. Not just hear it and acknowledge it without understanding it; I want you to actually believe it about yourself, too. Be proud of your size and shape, because it turns your boyfriend on.”
“So please stop worrying about dieting or losing weight. I’m sure it’ll take a lot of stress away if you do. Don’t get me wrong; I want you to be healthy. If you want to eat healthy food and work out, by all means do. But don’t do those things because you think you’re unattractive if you don’t. And don’t do them because society says you’re unattractive. Screw what society thinks!”
Raven replied, “Wow. You’ve given me a lot to think about.” She was silent for a few minutes, and then spoke again. “Remember when I said I wanted our relationship to be better than the ones I’ve had before, and so I want to do things differently this time? Well maybe this is another one of those things. Just about every boyfriend I’ve had has called me fat or pressured me to lose weight. That really takes a toll on the ol’ self-esteem. And that was about fifty pounds ago, so…” She paused another moment to gather her thoughts. “I can’t tell you it’s going to be easy to start thinking of myself as beautiful and sexy, because I’ve been thinking just the opposite for two decades now. But I’d like to try. That other way is exhausting and frustrating and no fun at all.”
Then she smiled mischievously and asked, “Do you want to see my big, jiggly belly now? Here it is!” And she lifted up her shirt with one hand and jiggled it with the other for him. Ryan leaned in for a kiss, and it wasn’t just a peck on the cheek, either.
That evening, up in her room, Raven did an online search for the acronym “BBW”. She quickly discovered that this wasn’t just something that Ryan made up – it was an established term that really did stand for what he said. She then looked that the images it brought up. All of them were of overweight and even obese women in flattering and sometimes sexy outfits. They all seemed happy and comfortable in their bodies. They seemed self-confident. Some of them were in flirty poses. Some of them were with men who clearly adored them. That was what she wanted for herself – to be happy and comfortable in her own skin and self-confident and adored by a man. It occurred to her that maybe beauty was just a state of mind.
Later, as she was preparing for bed, Raven stripped down to just her panties and looked at herself in the mirror. She said playfully to her own reflection, “Your boyfriend thinks you’re attractive and beautiful and sexy and hot, and so you are! Nobody else’s opinion matters.” She turned to see herself in the mirror from various angles. She still thought she looked fat and disgusting. Then she looked down at her body said the same thing to herself. “My boyfriend thinks I’m attractive and beautiful and sexy and hot, and so I am! Nobody else’s opinion matters. Not even mine. What do I know, anyway?”
But Raven realized that it wasn’t going to be as easy as that. It was fun to pretend that she was a big, beautiful woman, but in reality she still felt far from beautiful. Maybe if she worked at it, and with enough encouragement from Ryan, someday she would.
Eventually, it dawned on Ryan that they’d been in a relationship for some time now, and he hadn’t even taken her on a date. They’d just always hang out at her house. If he really was proud to be in a relationship with her, which he was, he realized he needed to prove it by being proud to be seen in public with her. The only problem was, even after all this time, he really didn’t know what she liked to do. Besides, he wasn’t all that experienced in dating, especially the going out and doing something together kind of dating.
Raven, likewise, had never been taken out on actual dates much. Her past boyfriends just weren’t the type that wined and dined and spent money on their ladies. So, it never really occurred to her that Ryan hadn’t taken her out, either. She was caught off guard when Ryan suggested that they go out and do something fun, but that he didn’t know what she might want to do. She didn’t know what she might want to do, either.
Ryan was a poor college student, though, and didn’t have a lot of money to spend. He suggested that they go to their high school’s upcoming homecoming football game. That seemed like a good idea to Raven as well. It would be fun to go back to their old school and root their team on.
At the game, most of the crowd was current students and their parents, whom for the most part neither of them knew. But there were some teachers and administrators present who remembered one or both of them, and they encountered a few of their own classmates as well. Ryan made a point of greeting everyone he knew and introducing Raven if they didn’t already also know her. Everyone who did know both of them thought to themselves what an unlikely couple they were. Everyone who knew Raven also noticed that she’d gained a good bit of weight since high school. Yet the pair seemed very happy and genuinely in love, and no one could recall ever seeing Raven smile so much.
Ryan’s strategy paid off well, because Raven was very much aware that he was showing her off to everyone. He seemed genuinely proud to be seen with her, and Raven found this to be very flattering. Ryan also kept asking her if she wanted anything from the concession stand, and when she said she did, he immediately and enthusiastically went to get it for her. It was just a simple high school football game date, but she really enjoyed the attention he was giving her. It made her feel special and valued, and maybe, just a little bit beautiful. It was such a refreshing change from how her past boyfriends had taken her for granted.
After the game, the couple sat on her family’s swing before they said goodbye for the night. Raven said to Ryan, “I really had fun tonight, Ryan. You don’t have to spend a lot of money or take me somewhere fancy in order to make me happy. You did good. Thanks for taking me.” And she gave him a passionate kiss goodnight.
Raven looked up “BBW” online again. This time she turned “safe search” off. Now, she also saw images of big girls in various stages of undress and seductive poses, flaunting their voluptuous bodies and even jiggling their fat for the camera. I guess this is what Ryan likes, she thought to herself. She had to admit, some of the women did look hot, even some who were much bigger that she was. Fat really could be sexy, she realized.
Chapter 6: Transitions
Now that a couple of months had passed since Raven had given birth, her parents were increasingly concerned that she didn’t seem to have a plan for what she was going to do next, or when. Her father told her, “We get that you’ve had a tough time of it this past year, and we were happy to have you here all these months to recover from that. But you can’t live here rent-free indefinitely and not be in school. You need to make a plan for going back to college or getting a job or something.”
Raven knew he was right. She’d done nothing to get started back at her college, enroll at another college, or look for a job. The problem was, she didn’t know what she wanted to do, and none of those things sounded appealing. One thing she knew, she couldn’t go back to the college she had been attending when she had been attacked by her then-boyfriend. She became very anxious even thinking about going there again. She probably had some level of PTSD from the attack, which wasn’t a problem most of the time, but likely would be a huge problem if she were back in the same place where it happened.
Raven had completed three semesters at that college, but that wasn’t good for much of anything. Her grades weren’t good enough to transfer to the state university where Ryan was attending, and that meant either going away to some other college, or going to community college. She really didn’t want to go away again, partly due to her anxiety and partly because she didn’t want to be apart from Ryan. And she’d soon have to declare a major, and really had no idea what that should be. She didn’t see much point in going to community college. If she went the academic route, she’d get an associate’s degree after a semester or two, depending on how many credits transferred, but so what? What would that get her, and what would she do after that? It would get her parents off her back for a while, but that’s about it. She could start in a vocational program she supposed, but to do what? Whatever she chose would probably be what she’d end up doing for a career, and nothing sounded interesting.
She figured she’d just have to get a job somewhere. It didn’t necessarily have to be what she’d do for the rest of her life; she just needed an income and something to do while she figured out the rest. She knew practically everywhere was shorthanded these days; she’d seen the signs in the windows and dealt with long lines due to staffing shortages. She just needed to work up the motivation to start looking.
Meanwhile, Raven had been thinking about the BBWs she had seen online. Many of them had been wearing lingerie and sexy outfits, but she had never seen anything like that in any of the stores or clothing websites she frequented. She just assumed they didn’t make that stuff in big sizes. The idea of having something sexy like that to wear intrigued her. Even if she only wore it under her clothes or in the privacy of her bedroom, it might help her feel less like a fat girl and more like a BBW.
So Raven searched online for where to buy plus-sized lingerie. Of course, there were tons of results to wade through, but one in particular caught her eye. They actually had a brick-and-mortar store right here in town. Raven decided she needed to go check it out. Shopping for clothing was always better done in person, where you could see, touch, and potentially try on whatever you were buying. Of course, trying on lingerie and underwear isn’t allowed, but she could still hold whatever she was interested in up to her body and get a pretty good idea whether it would fit.
A few days later, Raven borrowed her mother’s car and went to the lingerie store. It was certainly off the beaten path, in a small storefront in a small shopping center on a side street that Raven didn’t think she’d ever had reason to be on before. But it seemed safe enough, so she parked the car and went inside.
Raven immediately noticed two things. One was that she knew the store clerk. The other was the big “help wanted” sign on the counter. There were no other customers in the store, so the clerk was behind the counter reading a book. She looked up when the bells on the door rang as Raven entered. “Oh my God! Is that you, Raven?” said the clerk. It was Lacey Schmidt, who Raven knew from the high school cheerleading squad. Lacey was two years behind Raven, and was a junior varsity cheerleader when Raven was on varsity. Lacey was 18 years old and as trim and fit and cute as ever. She was certainly not the kind of person Raven expected to find working in a plus-size lingerie store.
“Yes, hi, Lacey,” Raven replied. “I certainly didn’t expect to find you working here. I figured a place like this would have clerks who could wear the merchandise themselves.”
Lacey explained. “Oh, this is my mom’s store. She’s shorthanded right now, so I’m just helping out when I don’t have classes.” Raven noticed that Lacey had been reading a college textbook. “So what can I help you with?” she added.
Raven said, “Well, as you can see, I’ve put on some weight since high school. I’ve been feeling sorry for myself, that I’ve become so fat and ugly. I thought maybe if I had something sexy to wear, it might improve my mood. Anyway, that’s the reason why I came, but I see your help wanted sign here. It just so happens that I need a job, so maybe I can fill out an application while I’m here, too.”
“You’re not fat or ugly, Raven!” exclaimed Lacey. “We don’t use those words here. I think you’re as pretty as ever; there’s just more of you to love. Anyway, I’m sure I can help you with both. But why don’t we take care of the job thing first. If you work here, you get an employee discount on your purchases. My mom’s in the back. I’ll get her and you can talk to her about the job.” She pressed the talk button on the intercom. “Mom, there’s someone out here who’s interested in the job. Can you come meet her?” Lacey’s mom indicated that she’d be right there.
A heavyset woman who appeared to be in her late 40s came out from the back and smiled at Raven. Before she could say anything, Lacey introduced them. “Mom, this is Raven Parrish. She was a varsity cheerleader when I was on J.V.” Her mom, still smiling, reached out to briefly hold Raven’s hand, as a kind of feminine version of a handshake. “Hi, Raven. I’m Suzanne Schmidt. It’s a pleasure to meet you. Why don’t you come in the back with me and we’ll talk?”
Mrs. Schmidt showed Raven around and told her about the business. It had been founded by Lacey’s grandmother over fifty years earlier. But Mrs. Schmidt had learned website design and had created an e-commerce store for the business fairly soon after the internet had become a thing. This was the only reason why the business had survived all these years. The vast majority of sales were online, and so they shipped merchandise all over the world. Consequently, most of the inventory was kept in the back of the store. There were several employees in the back busy filling online orders. Raven noticed that none of them were plus-sized.
Mrs. Schmidt elaborated on the job position. She needed a salesclerk in the brick-and-mortar store, and she knew from past experience that the in-store sales were better if the clerk were an attractive, young, plus-sized woman. But since business in the physical store was often slow, that clerk would also help fill online orders in between customers. She didn't make Lacey do that, because Lacey was doing her a favor helping out in a pinch and she needed time to study. They were about to start their busy season, which was the period leading up to Christmas and then continuing until Valentine’s Day, so she needed someone who could start right away and work full time.
Mrs. Schmidt then asked Raven about her previous work experience, what she’d been doing since high school, and why she wanted this job and what she hoped to get out it. Raven had worked in a fast food restaurant during high school, and then as a day camp counselor for the parks and rec department between her freshman and sophomore years of college, so she had that going for her. Raven told her she had completed three semesters of college, and then about the pregnancy, the attack, and the long recovery period. Raven explained that she didn’t know if she wanted to return to college, and so needed a job in the meantime, at least until she figured that out. She told her about her wonderful new boyfriend who had encouraged her to think of herself as a BBW, and her reason for coming to the store in the first place. When she saw the help wanted sign, she realized that working in such a place would help her accomplish that even faster.
Mrs. Schmidt had heard enough, and Lacey hadn’t given her any signals that she should avoid hiring Raven. She asked Raven, “How soon can you start?” Raven knew her mother didn’t need the car for the rest of the day. She replied, “I can start right now, if you want me to.” Mrs. Schmidt suggested that she stay and complete all the hiring paperwork, and then start actually working the next morning. Raven was agreeable to that, and did the paperwork and then headed home. She was very excited about the new job and proud that she had made such a good impression on Mrs. Schmidt that she hired her on the spot. This was the most excited she had been about anything, besides getting together with Ryan, that she could even recall. She couldn’t wait to tell her parents and especially Ryan.
Raven’s parents were very pleased that she had found a job, and were especially pleased that she was so excited about it. They could see that it was already doing good things for her self-esteem. Ryan couldn’t have been more pleased. Well, maybe he could have been if Raven had been hired as a lingerie model instead of a lingerie salesclerk, but a salesclerk was almost as good. Knowing that she had been struggling with knowing what to do and finding the motivation to pursue it, Ryan was also very proud of her for being decisive when an opportunity came along, and for having made such a good impression. He was thrilled to see her so enthused about something.
Raven’s first day on the job went well. Mrs. Schmidt and Lacey tag teamed in teaching her how to use the cash register, what the various kinds of lingerie were, how to know what sizes and colors they carried in stock and what they could special order, how the inventory was organized, and so on. They taught her how to greet customers and find out, or help them figure out, what they wanted, and how to make suggestions for additional purchases without sounding pushy. Raven eagerly took in all this knowledge and was a quick learner. She even made a few sales, with their help. Raven had the right kind of outgoing personality to be a natural salesperson, and her size and shape gave her instant credibility with the customers. This job was going to do wonders for her self-esteem, self-confidence, and body image. She knew it and so did her parents and her boyfriend.
One thing Raven noticed pretty quickly was the way male customers usually looked at her. It was quite different than what she was used to. These guys were there to buy lingerie for their plus-sized wives and girlfriends, and so they were almost always FAs, or fat admirers, as they’re called. The FAs clearly found Raven to be quite attractive, and it showed on their faces. This was a new experience for Raven, and rather than being creeped out by it, she enjoyed it. It made her feel beautiful and desirable. Away from the store, guys either tended to see right through her, or made their disgust evident.
Raven used her first paycheck to buy several lingerie items for herself, making use of her employee discount. She didn’t show them to anyone; she wasn’t ready to do that. She’d put them on in the privacy of her bedroom, and then look at herself in the mirror, finding it increasingly easier to regard herself as the big, beautiful woman Ryan said she was. Sometimes she’d sleep in them, imagining the time when she would spend the night with Ryan.
Chapter 7: Dance lessons
As Raven continued to get more comfortable in her own skin, it occurred to her that she had a unique opportunity in this relationship. She could actually teach her partner how to pleasure her sexually. None of her past partners were the type who gave a thought to satisfying her in bed, and nor were they the type to take suggestions regarding their performance. But Ryan, being a virgin, was a blank canvas, and being generally an eager-to-please guy, would happily do what she asked. This was just one more way she could make this relationship better than any she’d had before.
So when her parents signed up for dance lessons on Wednesday evenings, Raven knew she had her opportunity. One day she asked him, “Hey, Ryan, do you have anything going on Wednesday evenings?” He replied, “In general, you mean? Not really. My parents and my brother and sisters go to church Wednesday evenings. I usually use the time to study.” Raven knew full well his family went to church then. “Could you find another time to study?” she asked. “Sure, I suppose so,” he replied. “What do you have in mind?”
Raven just said, “My parents are starting dance lessons on Wednesday evenings. I thought we could have some dance lessons of our own. So Wednesday, after your family leaves, and my father’s car is gone from the driveway, come on over.” Ryan wondered what she meant by “dance lessons”.
So on Wednesday, Ryan did as she requested, and knocked on her door. He didn’t know what to expect. He suspected she didn’t literally mean they would be learning to dance, but he couldn’t rule it out, either. Raven was still a mystery to him in many ways. He half expected that she’d be wearing something from the lingerie store. Instead, she was fully dressed. She invited him in, and had him join her on the sofa, but it was clear she wanted to talk, not make out.
“Don’t worry, I’m not going to make you learn to dance,” she said. “But I am going to give you lessons.” That cleared nothing up for Ryan, but she continued. “I’m going to teach you how to make love to a woman, and specifically me.” Ryan was somewhat offended by this. Did she think he didn’t know what to do? She could see the reaction on his face, and explained. “I’m sure you don’t need to be told how to have sex. Every guy knows how to do that instinctively, I think. But not many of them know how to make it amazing for the girl, too, or even care if it is. I’m tired of just being f***ed. I want to be properly made love to by someone who knows what they’re doing. I’m sure you’ll be a great lover, once you learn what to do and not do. I can see the potential in you already.”
“Did you bring a condom with you?” she asked. He sheepishly replied negatively. “Do you even own a condom?” Again, a negative response. Raven replied, “I’ll give you a pass because I wasn’t clear on what we would be doing tonight. We’re not going to need one tonight, anyway. But don’t make that mistake again. As much as I love you, I’m not interested in getting knocked up again.
“So here’s your first lesson: A girl might be on the pill, or she might be using some other form of birth control. She might keep a supply of condoms on hand. But you can never assume any of that. A man needs to take responsibility for his own birth control, not just to keep from being a baby daddy, but also to make the girl feel that he’s looking out for her.
“This makes a nice segue into lesson two: A girl has to be in the right mood to enjoy sex. If she’s not already, it’s the man’s job to get her into the mood. And if he goes ahead and has sex with her when she’s not sufficiently in the mood, she’s going to feel like she was f***ed, not made love to. This is so difficult for many guys to understand.
“Men and women are wired completely differently. Men are usually aroused visually. You see a hot girl walking a certain way, or you get a look at a girl’s cleavage, and you can get turned on instantly. That’s why men like porn. But women don’t usually get turned on visually, nor can they do it as quickly.
“Pay careful attention now; this will be on the test. To get in the mood, usually, a woman has to feel loved. She has to feel special. She needs to feel like she’s the center of the guy’s universe. She needs to feel safe, and protected, and cared for, and valued, and adored. That’s why women like romance novels and romantic comedy movies. They live vicariously through the heroine of the story who’s being swept off her feet by her lover. Girls want to be swept off their feet by their own lovers. It’s why women like romantic dinners and getting flowers and candy and love notes from their guys. But she has to feel that the guy went to some effort; that she’s worth going to some effort for.
“There are lots of ways a man can make a woman feel special. It can be through a man’s actions. It can be through what he says to her. It can be the way he kisses her or the way he caresses her body. But this can take a while; she gets into the right mood slowly. That’s why foreplay is so important to women. They can’t get into the mood if they feel rushed.
“A woman who feels those things and has been given sufficient time to warm up will practically throw herself at her man. She’ll be horny and even desperate for her man to bring her to climax.” Bringing a woman to climax – that’s an entirely different lesson, which we’ll get to another night. But this lesson is that a woman has to be put in the mood by the man in order to be ready for sex.
“Let me bring it home for you with some specific examples. When you showed up at the hospital with my parents after I was attacked, I felt like I was the center of your universe. You dropped everything to come to me in my time of need. I know you were just trying to help my parents get to the hospital safely, but that’s how I perceived it. When you sit on the swing with me and give me your time and attention, I feel valued. When I was in labor and you took me to the hospital and then stayed with me through the delivery, I felt cared for. When we make out, I feel loved, because I can tell you’re doing it in a way that makes me feel good, and not just yourself. Making out is essentially foreplay, so I think you’ll do all right in that department. When you took me to homecoming, I could tell that you were proud to be seen with me. That made me feel special. So is it any wonder that I’ve fallen head over heels in love with you?
“But you can’t just rest on your laurels. I’m not going to be put in the mood for sex by what you did weeks or months ago. I’m going to be put in the mood by what you did today, or are doing at the moment.
“I know that was a lot to digest, but I hope you get the general idea.” Ryan nodded affirmatively.
“One more lesson, and I think that’ll be enough for tonight. It’s much harder for a woman to get in the mood if she’s not physically and mentally and emotionally well. Not impossible, but much harder. So if I’m exhausted, or I had a bad day, or I’m sick or in pain, or I’m upset or stressed or worried, it probably isn’t a good time to try to initiate sex. If you’re horny and I have a headache, it’s not going to go well if you won’t take no for an answer; I’m going to feel used. If I’m mad at you for some reason, I’m not going to want to put out.
“Self-esteem plays a big part, too. If I don’t feel good about myself, it’s going to be much harder to get into the mood. For that reason, sincere compliments are always welcome. But that was why I told you that time that I wasn’t ready for sex with you, because I was feeling very fat and unattractive at the time. I told you then that I’d work on trying to perceive myself as a BBW. If you haven’t noticed, I’ve been working on that, and I’ve come a long way. It’s a daily battle, but I do think I’m coming around.
“Okay, now come over here and let’s practice our foreplay skills. Above the waist only tonight, since you don’t have a condom.”
Over the next several weeks, the lessons continued. They covered such topics as how to communicate likes and dislikes during foreplay and sex, appropriate ways to respond to such feedback, what to say to enhance the mood or kill the mood during foreplay and sex, and specific likes and likes during foreplay, with actual practice of the likes. Raven made a point of learning from Ryan what his preferences were as well, which helped him feel less embarrassed about his inexperience. She also covered potential male problems such as premature ejaculation, inability to get hard, and inability to finish, how to reduce the chances of those things happening, and how they’d deal with it if it did happen. It seemed that she had seen it all.
The lessons then continued with a basic understanding of female genitalia, erogenous zones, and the like, and moved on to various sexual positions and techniques, including specific likes and dislikes. During this time, the foreplay moved to below the waist, but Raven insisted that they both keep their underwear on and avoid genital-to-genital contact, including grinding on each other. She said that that was reserved for the final exam. She taught him how to bring her to climax without such contact, and likewise showed him various ways she could bring him to climax.
Ryan soaked all this information in like a sponge. He felt well-prepared for the day when they would consummate their relationship. Raven was confident that she had developed him into a great lover.