Story 3: The Severing
Chapter 6:
I love you!?! No fucking way am I going to say those words. No way!
"You don't have to mean it, subGrrl. I just want to hear you say those words...."
Oh, god!
The air in the room was thick and hard to inhale. The bells. Maybe they were sprinkling density into the gases of the room. Oh, god!
"Say it. Come on. I'll help. Say 'I'..."
I tried to open my mouth. No. I did open my mouth. But every time that I tried to make my vocal chords work, they froze up tighter. I knew that my voice would tremble so. What would she think of me if my voice was trembling so much? I had forgotten to breathe.
"Just one word, subGrrl... Say 'I'..."
I kept trying to say 'I'. I kept opening my mouth to say it but each time fear would overwhelm me and my mouth would close again.
"Say 'I'..."
With my mouth opening and closing, I probably looked like a fish. Fish probably don't love their owners unconditionally. They are probably not even aware that they have owners - mindlessly swimming around in circles praying that a fickle and indifferent deity will throw out some nibblets. We're all fish.
"Life must be so hard for you, subGrrl," NemesisGirl said. Frankly, I was completely surprised by the tone of her voice. She wasn't being snarky or condescending. She seemed to express compassion. My tears began in full again and my nose began to run. My life is hard. I had to sniff and the bells went wild.
"Poor pet..." NemesisGirl said. I felt a tissue dab gently at my nose. Her fingers held my chin. "You really DO need an owner, don't you, pet."
I tugged at my wrists, manacled behind my back and slumped a little crying all the harder. I do...
"Alright, subGrrl. I understand that you are frozen. You need time to thaw. I'll tell you what I'm going to do. I have a magic gag. I am going to lock this magic gag on you." I sucked in some air and stiffened a bit, shaking even more.
"Let me tell you how this gag works," NemesisGirl continued. "My magic gag is invisible, but it will prevent you from making any sound at all. I'm going to lock it on you now." I felt a finger press very lightly against my lips. "You will never utter a single sound at work to anybody. Not me. Not BossWoman. Nobody. Not even if someone asks you a direct question. Don't worry. I will make up a reason why you can't talk. You will never utter a single sound. Never."
I had to open my mouth in order to breathe because my nose was so stuffed. When I did, NemesisGirl pushed her finger into my mouth. I closed my lips around her finger and tasted her flesh.
"Do you understand?" NemesisGirl then used her finger to force my head up and down as though I were nodding slightly. She pulled her finger out. "Very good, my little pet."
I suddenly realized that I was still nodding even without her prompting and so I froze again. Was I agreeing to play her little game? The idea of not talking... Did I actually feel a sense of relief?
"My magic gag, that I have allowed you to wear, pet, only has one key," NemesisGirl whispered. "And I am going to give that key to you. You can use it any time that you want."
This is kind of a stupid, stupid game then, isn't it?
"The key is four simple words that you have to say to me," NemesisGirl whispered. "You have to say 'I love you, NemesisGirl' and then you will magically be able to speak again. All you want... Until then... Not a sound."
Her arm snaked around behind me and rested lightly on my naked shoulder. Her lips were right next to my ear. Her breath made my hair rustle slightly. "This way, my pet, you can go home and plan how you will say those four words. You can practice. Write them down like a script to read to me, maybe. You don't have to mean it, pet. Please don't take too long... You just have to say them... 'I love you... NemesisGirl'."
I felt her hand on my wrist. A key slid into one of the manacles and it popped open. NemesisGirl then put several keys into my hand. "These keys will unlock everything. Your clothes and shoes are sitting next to you. Keep the cuffs and blindfold. Keep the bells. Wear them when you want and think about me. Now, don't move until I have left the room."
Lips grazed my head lightly. Then there was a movement of air. The door unlocked, opened and closed again and I was alone in the room.