Zoe sat down at the head of the table. She licked stray dumpling sauce off her fingers, then cracked her knuckles. "Alright ladies, is everyone ready for our undersea adventure?"

Amber smiled. "I think so. Are you ready to run your first game Zoe?"

"Pffft, I've been watching all of you run these no problem. Heck Amber, you threw us across a mountain range when you were done and we're still playing. I've got this."

Jess adjusted some papers in front of her and shook her head. "I still think you're crazy for actually WANTING to manage three dimensional combat underwater." Her statement turned Amber's look of cautious optimism to worry.

"BUT IT'S WITH MERMAAAAIDS!" Scarlett shouted triumphantly, arms raised above her head, ignorant of the perils ahead.

Zoe laughed, using Scarlett's excitement to break the tension. She knew Jess was right, but if she was going to run a gaming session, she was going to go big.

One more woman sat at the table. She had long braided blue hair resting over her shoulder. She wore black leggings and a cream colored blouse, featuring a small black logo for the "It Fits!" clothing company. She rubbed her freckled cheek thoughtfully with a sparkle in her pink eyes, idly running a finger through the pile of pink and green dice in front of her. "Are your friends always this excited Zoe? I should have listened to Sonia and come over here weeks ago."

Jess laughed. "Oh, we're just getting started Pepper. Glad to have you in the party tonight."

"Alright then," Zoe smacked the table gleefully to get everyone's attention, "let's get to it. I know everyone's worried about me, but I'll remind you that we're going with the lore from Jessica's REVISED module, after she had a Kraken fold us into paper boats to sail home the first time."

"Hey, I fixed it!"

Amber and Scarlett giggled at the memory.

"Aaaanyway. The party found out the Kraken was working with the Duchess to steal that Idol. You got it back, but something is weighing on you. You sail back to return the idol and talk to the not-actually-Pirate Captain..." She turned to Jessica. "Did we ever rename her?"

"That's your job GM."

"Right. Well, you talk with not-a-captain Ally. She doesn't remember much about her time with the Pirates. She only remembers the ship constantly patrolling a rock formation. Every time she asked why they weren't looting others, her memories get fuzzy. Probably the Kraken shutting things down.

"Still, between that and vague descriptions of things visiting from under the sea, it stands to reason whatever lair the Duchess had might be there. It's another day of sailing away from the island, but that's not the hard part.

"Sailing there is simple. But your adventure will take you under the sea. Talking with Ally, you discover she's loaded with magic. Your plan is to use a ritual to turn into merfolk until you return to the ship."

Zoe wiggled her fingers delectably. "So, tell me about your sexy mermaids."

* * *

Scarlett jumped off the boat and into the water. She wore thin blue veils around her shoulders, obscuring but not hiding her tropey blue seashell bra. Her shoulder length red hair matched her long fish tail's color, accented by a dazzling gold tiara. Her purple belt held a dagger and a pouch, the only visible adventuring gear in her possession. She was beautiful, with a a smile that was more than enough to draw your attention away from whatever spells she was casting.

Amber splashed under the sea next. The start of her dark yellow tail was hidden under a chain shirt that shimmered pink and gold. She wore no helmet, leaving her dirty blond ponytail to float freely over her head in the water. Her thick leather belt showed no signs of wear, holding not just a pouch but a katana in scabbard. She wore bronze vambraces on her muscular arms, a faint glow giving away they were for more powerful than they seemed.

Jessica's character looked a little different than usual. Her mermaid's hair was styled in a tall mohawk, colored neon purple along with her tail. Where her friends had clearly manufactured outfits, Jessica's looked entirely made of plants. Thick bands of kelp formed a cloak around her, with more seaweed wrapped around her torso to serve as a bra. A pair of large shells served as make shift pauldrons to hold the armor together. On her head was a wreath of holly and mistletoe, a classic sign of a druid.

Pepper jumped in last. The bard's attire was crafted as if made by the fashion designer herself. Despite being a mermaid she still wore a skirt of sorts, a seafoam green shawl wrapped about her waist, covering the top half of her white, blue tinted tail. Gold filigree and charms were sown into the base to hold the wrap in place. A similar piece of fabric, this one a soft pink hung over her shoulders and attached to her chest with a ruby pendant. Seashells adorned her blue hair, yellows, reds, and oranges. Her thumbs and middle fingers each had a small cymbal attached, a dazzling gold. A small flute was visible, crafted from a long seashell, tucked into her skirt.

* * *

Zoe was smiling, elbows on the table. "Mmmmm, I do love cute mermaids. Hey Jess, do you remember that night after the water course where we got caught in that-"

"Not now Zoe!" Jessica blushed, cutting off Zoe before she could finish. "Get on with the adventure."

"Fiiiine, but admit it you all love this too." Zoe's statement was met with an excited nod from Scarlett, and laughter from the rest.

"Okay. You're in the water near the rock formation. Above water you saw tendrils of stone reaching up around a jagged peak. Now that you're under the waves, you see that was just the tip of the proverbial iceberg. A mountain extends hundreds of feet down into the murky depths. You may think the lair is here, but you might be searching for a while if you want to find it."

"What do you want to do?"

Amber shrugged. "I can start looking around, but I don't think a sword will help much."

Scarlett looked over her character sheet. "Oh, I can search for magic right?"

"You can, and it will help find some illusions, but unless your spell has good range it won't speed up your search by very much."

Jess drummed her fingers on the table, deep in thought. "Hey Zoe. We're in the middle of the ocean right? There's gotta be fish around here. What's swimming near by?" She tossed a 20 sider on the table, landing on 16.

"Nice roll. Well, technically killer whales aren't fish, but you do spot a few swimming around."

"SQEEEEEEE!!!"

Everyone looked at Pepper.

* * *

"I love orcas!" The bard swam full speed towards the huge animals.

"Pepper wait!" Jess called after Pepper, but she was swimming fast.

Scarlett swam backwards after her, veils floating around in the water. "What's wrong? She just wants to play with them, right?"

"They might be more aggressive than we think." Jessica's body started to grow. Her torso expanded, her mohawk slid down her back to look more like a fin. Her body changed colors, looking more and more like a neon purple orca with a few white spots. "I need to go say hello to them before anything strange happens."

While the others figured out what to do, Pepper reached the trio of orcas. She swam in a few loops around them, eliciting laughter from the animals. She slowed to float in front of them, blue braid floating behind her.

"Hello! Aren't you wonderful creatures. I've always wanted to see some up close!"

The whales chattered and looked at each other, as if discussing something.

"Okay, we can keep playing! Watch this!" Pepper swam up at the surface full speed, jumped out, and spun in the air. Sunlight danced along her fish tail, making the water sparkle around her.

The orcas laughed again, and two of them jumped out of the water mimicking her. "Yeaaah this is fun!" Pepper went to follow the third one, and jumped again.

When she got out of the water, the original two orcas jumped at her from both sides.

"Wait! No, don't crash into-AAACK!"

They narrowly missed squishing Pepper between them, but did spin her around. She tumbled into the water, where the third orca was waiting. It gave her a playful sniff.

"Oh..." Pepper's eyes were still spinning. "Hi there little-WHOA!"

*CHOMP*

Pepper's friends arrived just in time to see the orca snap its jaws and devour her in one bite. They watched Pepper get chewed up, strands of cream and blue goop filling the beast's mouth, stretching out between its teeth. Occasionally a pink eye would appear stretched out on the goo's surface, looking around nervously.

Jessica, now a large neon purple orca swimming between Amber and Scarlett, started chatting with Pepper's new best friends. Like any good Druid, Jess temporarily spoke the language while turned into an animal.

(Hey! Can we have our friend back?)

(Oh, this silly mermaid is your friend? We were just playing together. She's good at swimming!)

(Yeah! I think she wants to get back to normal.)

The orca shot air bubbles from its mouth, the underwater equivalent of a huff. (Okay. She was fun to play with though.)

It tensed up and arched its back while floating towards the surface. Amber and Scarlett floated up to watch.

As soon as the orca get above the surface,
*SPFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF*
"WHAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!"

Pepper shot out of the blow hole as a pillar of blue and cream colored liquid, splattering into the air. On top of the spout, her pink eyes danced on top of her gooey body, before splashing into the water once the orca was done.

Scarlett elbowed Amber. "Hey! We got to see Pepper Spray in this adventure!"

Amber gave her a look. "Really?"

"Okay, okay, let's just get her back together."

Jess kept talking to the orcas. (One more thing, have you seen any weird creatures around?)

(Oh there's a cave down by the bubbly vent thing. Strange tiny serpents move a rock around a lot. Try there.)

(Thanks! Happy fishing!)

By then, Amber and Scarlett had collected Pepper's splattered body into a long oval shape. Her pink eyes stared out at her surroundings.

Jess said goodbye to the orcas and they swam off. She went back to her friends, her form rippling as it shrank and compressed into itself, returning to her mermaid body.

"Alright, I got some good info from our friends. We're looking for an out of place rock in the deep. Think you can avoid playing rough with the locals this time Pepper?"

The light blue goop wobbled and POPPED back into Pepper's normal shape, splashing a few droplets into the sea as she did. "I guess, but you know I don't play gentle."

* * *

Zoe cackled at Pepper's remark at the table. "Pepper dear, you do realize you're playing a Bard right?"

Pepper twirled her finger around her braid while playfully shuffling her dice around. "Do you think she studied wildlife in bard school while *not* having a good time? Can't she like *eh-hem* ze creatures of ze sea?"

Everyone laughed at Pepper's corny accent.

"Alright, Pep Cousteau." Zoe tried to get everyone's attention to get back on track, even if she was still laughing too. "Jessica got the information from the friendly whales. Unless you want to do anything else, start rolling perception..."

Dice clattered around the table. Jess and Pepper stared at the small numbers in dismay.

"Uuuuuh 11 for my Druid?"
"Bard's got a 10."

Scarlett was at least not surprised by her result. "Two!"
Zoe responded through the laughter. "Well, you realize you're in the ocean. Amber, care to bail us out?"

Amber rolled late, since her fighter wasn't expected to do well on these rolls. The small cheers at the table followed it stopping on 20.

"Oh wow! So...what does a 19 see?"

Jessica muttered "Damn fighters and their penalties." To more laughter.

"Alright, it was a natural 20 I guess. You swim down to the base of the undersea mountain, in the general direction indicated by the local wildlife. The more eagle eyed party members search in all sorts of strange places, expecting to find this rock hidden away in a valley behind seaweed and who knows what else. That leaves Amber and Scarlett to stand watch. A few minutes into your search, Amber calls out..."

* * *

"Hey! We're looking for a giant rock, right?"

Pepper and Jessica stopped where they were and turned looked at their friends.

"What about that one?" Amber pointed at the ground behind her. A huge boulder, easily 20 feet across, sat suspiciously embedded in the mountain, right out in the open.

Jess rubbed her forehead. "Well why didn't you find that sooner!" The ladies all swam over to the big rock to investigate further.

* * *

Amber looked to Zoe at the table. "So I just lift the rock out of the way?"

"You can try. Roll it."

Amber rolled a smiled. "27."

Zoe laughed.

* * *

Amber's face strained, and her fish tail flexed against the ground for leverage. The rock was not moving.

Jess watched the struggle, and put a hand on Amber's shoulder. "Okay, you've been at this for two minutes and nothing's happened. I'm magicking you."

Amber grunted, annoyed at the rock. "Alright. I guess it is pretty big."

Jessica's hands glowed as she cast two spells, tapping Amber's shoulders after each one. Immediately, her body bulked up, creaking the straps on her bracers and straining the links of her armor. Amber flexed her new muscles, even slapping the ground hard to test her strength with her tail, kicking up sand and shells.

"This feels pretty good, I think I can-" Amber started to grow. "MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM!" She doubled in size, becoming a twelve foot tall mermaid.

She grinned. "Alright everyone, stand back!"

The enlarged Amber put both hands under the rock. The mountain groaned, and with one good push from her tail, Amber finally lifted the boulder free, sending bubbles to the surface.

"YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAARG!!!"

With boulder free from its seal, Amber lifted it cleanly into the water above her. It was much lighter than they thought, and Amber threw it clear over her head. It crashed to the ground behind her, and rolled away.

"Got it." Amber dusted off her hands, and looked around, not seeing Jessica nearby anymore. She found Scarlett and Pepper floating a short distance away.

"Hey, did you see where Jessica went?"

Scarlett looked a little embarrassed, and swam back towards the boulder, which had finally come to a rest.

Pepper spoke as she followed. "Amber, I know you like squishing things, you might want to make sure your friends are out of the way before throwing weight around like that."

Amber looked at the boulder where it rested, and saw the problem. Smeared over a full half of the stone was Jessica. Her purple mohawk was at least a foot wide in its flattened state, and the rest of her was only smeared more. Her curves were splattered wider than the rest of her, barely covered by her outfit in their flattened state. Her mermaid body was like wet paint scattered on the boulder, a gooey mess of seaweed green and brown skin, with spirals for eyes.

"Whoops..."

They caught up to Scarlett and noticed the next problem. The rock was stuck in a crater, and the ground was shaking.

"Um, ladies? I think you clogged an undersea volcano of some sort." She tried to peel Jessica's arm off the rocks, and only scrapped off brown goop. "Pepper, hurry up and help me!"

Pepper startled to attention, and hurried over. "Are you sure this is safe?"

"It's probably not but we have to get her out of here!"

They both scratched at Jessica, but neither could do much more than scratch off gooey bits of her. Their efforts did nothing to persuade the volcano from building pressure. The ground swelled beneath them.

Scarlett's pale skin got paler. She swam up and away from the ground, realizing something was about to happen. "Uuuuuh Pepper? I think we need to leave."

*SHHHHLP* "Hang on, I think Jess finally got solid enough to peel off! I just need one-"

*FWOOOOOOOOOOM*

The pressure got too high, and the undersea volcano erupted. Fire, lava, and magma spewed forth from the earth, shattering the rock apart. Jessica felt her already messy body messy body break apart, carried off by shards of rock to float around in the water. It was going to take some time to reassemble herself.

Pepper was floating next to the rock when it exploded. The lava and fire made short work of her clothes, and quickly made fried fish of her. When the bubbles and flames died out, Pepper's body was completely charred. She weakly said "I didn't think this could happen underwater..." before her body drifted apart in a cloud of blue, cream, and black ash, centered around her pink eyes.

Scarlett managed to swim away from the disaster below. She avoided the worst of the flames, but still felt bits of rock and intense heat behind her. She willed herself higher in the water, but she felt her tail getting heavy and hard to move. When she finally looked down to investigate, Scarlett found a trail of melted red tail goop following her. Her whole body was drippy, slowly succumbing to the eruption's heat.

"Come on body move!" She struggled to make her increasingly goopy tail swish in the water, only succeeding in swirling red goop and losing her form's shape.

Then she saw the huge steam bubble rising towards her. She stopped struggling, not entirely unhappy about her impending meltdown.

"Oh..."
*BLBLBLBLBLBLBLBLB*
"MMMMMMMMMmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm"

The bubble rose right through Scarlett, melting right through her with intense relaxing heat. Her body flowed around the bubble, becoming a bubbling mess of pale skin and red tail and hair rising in the water. She was spread thin enough that the following smaller bubbles did the same, tickling her puddled form and sending shivers through her.

* * *

"Heh..." Scarlett flipped her drooping hair out of her face, with a goofy smile on her face.

Jessica laughed. "Oh Scarlett, can't you go one session without your character melting?"

She stood up and walked towards the bathroom. "I just need a minute. Excuse mEEE-"

*SPLAT*

Scarlett slipped on her own melting foot, face planting on the wood floor and splattering her front half.

"Hang on babe, I've gotcha." Amber got up to go into the kitchen. "Anyone else need anything?"

Pepper held up her glass. "More wine!" She looked at Scarlett, shuffling a handful of pink and blue dice around in her hand. "Does she usually slip on herself?"

Zoe deliberately shuffled some papers around loudly. "Even you might be surprised. She'll be up soon. Anyway, the four of you start swimming into the dark cave. Can any of you see in the dark?"

"Blrrrrb Mmmfm mfff!"

Zoe looked at the floor. "Scarlett, pull yourself together so we can hear you."

Scarlett grabbed the back of her head, and peeled it off the floor as if it were a sticky piece of gum. It stretched off the floor before popping back into a solid shape. "I said I can use some Dancing Lights." She finished peeling and resolidifying her body as everyone else came back to the table.

Zoe continued. "Excellent! Well, now that you can see..."

* * *

The ladies swam further into the cave. The undersea tunnels were devoid of light, but Scarlett's magic lit the way, keeping a small ball of light dancing around everyone.

Most of the tunnels were plenty wide, at least 30 feet across. One particularly large intersection awaited them though, with a veritable swiss cheese of small tunnels visible along with 4 or 5 larger ones.

Scarlett looked around. "Uuuh, now what?"

They all swam around, searching different parts of the massive chamber.

Jessica scratched her head. "I see nothing around here. Not a single fish or crab to ask." She shook her head. "This isn't normal."

Amber just shrugged and looked around. "I don't see anything either. Looks like something for you magic people."

Pepper swam towards the middle of the cave. "Some of these tunnels just have to be connected. What if we just made a lot of noise and listened for echos?"

Amber shrugged. "It's as good an idea as any. Go for it!"

Pepper took out her seashell flute, and swam around playing it. The others swam near other tunnels, listening for the echo of music.

This went on for a minute or so, until Pepper was playing into the giant hole in the floor. Scarlett, Amber, and Jessica waved to each other for attention.

"I don't hear anything!"
"Me neither!"
"Yeah, that one's not connected to the rest!"

Pepper paused her tune to look up, smiling. "Excellent! Could you swim around the rest to be sure? There were A LOT of tunnels here."

They did as she asked while she continued playing.

"Nothing here!"
"Yeah I think we're actually clear!"
"Good work Pepper!"
"Yessss very nice song!"

All four mermaids looked at each other. "Who said that?"

"HUUUUUURK!"
*SQUOOOOOSH*

Pepper's world went dark, something wrapping around her eyes. She felt pressure on all sides, normally a welcome experience, but not when exploring caverns. She felt her tail fin crush into her fish butt. Her mass trying to escape into her chest was foiled, as her growing torso was immediately crushed together before it could expand. Her head got squished last, her hair circling around her as it squished together. She was thoroughly squished.

They looked to where Pepper was. Instead of her cute mermaid body, there was a bumpy tube of disorganized pink, blue, and cream colors.

The same voice as earlier echoed through the cave. "Looks like I have another three too curious mermaids to deal with."

"Where is this thing?!"

Amber slowly scanned the tunnels near her, searching for their opponent while she drew her sword. "Show yourself!"

"Okay."

*SLAM*
*SQUIIISH*

Jessica and Scarlett saw a massive sea serpent appear outside the tunnel near Amber. It slammed its tail slammed against the wall, leaving it full of cracks, and squishing their friend.

The serpent lifted its tail revealing a very wide, very flat Amber, arms outstretched as if hugging the serpent tail and completely unable to catch it. Her hair was splattered over her head, and her tail was hooked to one side. Her whole body, and even her sword, were so thoroughly crushed into the wall, she looked like a ten foot painting of herself with a goofy grin and spinning eyes.

"Uh oh..." Scarlet floated towards the walls of the cave, looking very worried about their situation.

"Don't worry Scarlett, I've got this overgrown snake."  Jessica cracked her knuckles. "Let's see..."

The serpent turned to Jessica. "You'll have to act quickly. I'm the fastest creature in the sea!"

Jessica's teeth were slowly getting sharper, and her skin was just starting to get scaly, when the serpent wrapped its tail around her waist.

"OOOF"!

"Thank you deary," The serpent snarled. "I've needed something for lifting."

"What?!"

*SLAM!*
*WHAM!*
"AACK!"

The serpent kept its grip on Jess and slammed her tail into the rocks below her, flattening it into a thick purple disk. Before Jessica could do anything to escape, it whipped its tail towards another ledge, slamming her head first into the wall. Jessica's head was squished into another thick disk of bright purple and brown.

Jessica looked like a gym weight in the serpent's tail. The serpent naturally started flexing and lifting her, as if it had time to work out mid fight.

"One...two...three...wow you merfolk druids are lighter than I remember. Maybe I'm just too-ACK!"

Five orbs of force slammed into the serpent, denting its body. This freed Jessica from its grasp, letting her dumbbell body sink to the floor.

"What are you thinking?! You look like the squishiest of all your friends!" The serpent slammed its tail on Jessica for emphases, reducing her to a large multicolor splat of her colors on the rocks.

"EEEEEEEP!" Scarlett waved her arms frantically, and swam away from serpent and the middle of the room towards a distant wall.

The serpent charged after her, full speed. "There's no escape! I know these caves like the back of my-EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEERK!"

The serpent's head slammed into something in the middle of the room. Its whole body crumpled, collapsing into itself, until the serpent was a three foot wide disk suspended in the water.

The area around the serpent shimmered, fading into the wall that Scarlett was floating in front of earlier. Scarlett herself faded back into visibility next to it, giggling.

"Hahaha! Silly Serpent!" She peeled the serpent off the wall to look at its squished face. "Your speed's no good if you can't see through illusions!" Scarlett's ice blue eyes glowed, and frost surrounded her hands holding the flattened fish.

*CRRRRRNK!*

The serpent disk was frozen solid.

Scarlett looked to her friends, still a tube, a painting, and a splat. She reached into her pouch. "Hmmm, I think I brought a paint knife..."

* * *

Scarlett looked smugly at Pepper. "See? I can keep cool under pressure."

"Very funny Scarlett."

The other ladies at the table laughed.

Accepting defeat on this point, Pepper smiled and rolled her eyes. "Alright Zoe. Where are we going now?"

"That tunnel with no echos leads down deeper under the sea floor. One, long, deep, shaft, down into the darkness. After several minutes, you start hearing chanting ahead. Pepper, Bards know weird things about the occult, roll it for me."

Pepper rolled her pink and green d20. It almost seemed to force itself to stay on the green ringed 20 side. "33!" She picked up the d20 and gave it a quick kiss as thanks.

Amber, Jessica, and Scarlett shared high fives with her, while Zoe stifled a laugh.

"Very nice. You recognize it as a coven of Sea Hags performing a dark ritual. You hear three of them."

Amber looked around the table. "Well ladies? Can we sneak in there?"

Jessica shook her head. "We haven't seen fish down here for hours. No way I wouldn't stand out."

Scarlett put an elbow on the table and held her head in that hand, thinking. "They might have magic. This is their lair, who knows what they're expecting."

Jessica laughed. "I know Zoe's been playing with me for a while, but I don't know if she would have everything covered."

"Why don't we just charge in? They don't know we're here."

They all looked at Pepper, still rearranging her oddly colored dice.

"We're almost positive we're dealing with your big bad's minions. We know hags are pretty evil. Why not charge in and smoosh 'em?"

The ladies looked at each other for a moment. When nobody objected, Jessica said "Yeah, let's get 'em!"

"Woooo!" Amber and Scarlett signaled their approval.

* * *

"Everyone ready?"

"Wait one second. Amber, stay near my back."

Jessica's curves smoothed out and her upper body grew scaly like her tail. Her mohawk slid down her back to be a hot pink fin on her back, and her mouth extended huge snout full of razor sharp teeth.

Amber embraced and squeezed her new shark mount. She clamored on, putting a hand on Jessica's top fin and resting her fish tail on her back.

Their plan decided, the mermaids (and shark) charged into the hag's chamber. As Pepper said, there were three of them. They were chanting around a cauldron suspended above another undersea vent.

They spoke in unison, a haunting discordant sound. "Aaaaah, guests. BEGONE!"

Hundreds of schools of fish filled the water in front of them, obscuring the hags from view.

"Ack!"
"I can't see anything! Too many fish!"
"LUNCH!"

While Pepper and Scarlett were getting spun in circles by hundreds of fish, Jessica chewed her way through, taking Amber along for the ride.

"Whooooooooooa Jessica are you sure about this?"

"IMASHAAAAAAAAAAARK OM NOM NOM NOM"

They made it through to the other side. The three Sea Hags had split up, but one was relatively close to them. Jessica the shark was looking a little pudgy after her meal. Her body was noticeably rounder from too many fish, and it was slowing her down.

In fact, Jess was breathing a little heavy. "I'ma....shark..."

Amber took the hint and let go of her fin to swim ahead. She drew her sword and charged the nearest hag. "I got this Jess!"

The hag panicked, weakly lobbing a ball of acid in Amber's direction. She twisted around it, and with a few quick cuts, sliced up the hag.

*SHWIP*SHWIP*SHWIP*

Small pieces of the hag drifted apart in the water, her separating eyes looking around nervously.

* * *

Scarlett and Pepper were still getting spun around by the fish. Every attempt to move around was blocked by the swarming fish.

"Pepper! Can you do anything about this?!"

Both mermaids were pushed out of the swarm back where they started. "I'd love to Scarlett, but I can't get to my flute in this! Don't you have magic or something?"

"Well, I was saving this one, but I guess it's now or never." Scarlett started waving her hands, again lighting up her ice blue eyes.

At that moment, Amber sliced up a hag, and the swarm dissipated.

Pepper saw her opening, and started swimming through the fish. "Something happened! Scarlett let's move!"

She swam into the opening, just as Scarlett unleashed a large blast of freezing energy into the fish. Its effect was immediate, turning the entire chunk of water into a cone of ice.

Scarlett watched her new iceberg float to the top of the cavern, the already scattering swarm of fish moving faster out of the way to avoid getting squished on the ceiling. "There! Let's go help our friends Pepper...Pepper?...Uh oh."

*CHRRRSSSSH*

Scarlett looked up at the shattering shard of ice to have her fears confirmed. Several frozen fish emerged from the breaking ice, along with a frozen mermaid. Most of the fish tinked harmlessly back to the ceiling, but Pepper was headed towards a stalactite.

"Ooooops."

Pepper's fragile body floated into the spike head first. She gasped as it drove through her body and shattered her apart. She much preferred this sensation at room temperature, preferably on the surface.

"Hang on Pepper, I'll put you back together!"

One of the hags appeared in front of Scarlett. "Not so fast little fishy."

"Uh ooooh..."

* * *

Jessica watched Amber fight with a small serpent undersea warrior woman. The hag near the cauldron must have summoned her. She was swimming a little slower after her meal, but seeing the fish go away and the hags panic meant the effort was worth it. She stayed low to the cavern floor and stealthily approached the hag.

It was still focused on Amber in front of her. "Get her you fool! It's one stupid woman! She's not even really a mermaid! She shouldn't even be a good swimmer!" She waved her arms around some more, and a burst of bubbles appeared in front of Jessica beyond the battle.

Jess swam up behind her and...

*CHOMP*

The headless hag had a row of bitemarks down to the neckline of her rags. Jess made a show to her remaining opponent of chewing up a green gooey hag head, before spitting the blob with eyes to the ground. The hag's body collapsed into goop next to it.

"Good work Jess!" Amber waved.

"Thanks!"

What happened next could only be described as an undersea water quake. The three combatants looked around for the source of their unease, and a tremendous fish swam from where the hag created bubbles.

"Uh oh" said Amber.
"Meep" said Jessica.
The serpent woman smiled.

The fish swam to Jessica, swallowing her whole.

"Oh no, you're not getting rid of me that easily!" Inside the fish, Jessica felt her body shift away from being a shark, to a smaller fish that was stretchier with spikes.

"Jessica!" Amber cried, seeing her friend vanish within. She could still hear her, but she needed to cut Jess free immediately.

The warrior lifted her hammer. "Hey, I'm still here!"

*SQUIIIIIIIIIISH*

Amber's tail scrunched together in an S pattern, her body collapsing into itself as a zig zag of mermaid. Her shiny armor crunched into her yellow tail, and Amber's widening body sent dust and sand scattering. She was now a five foot warrior pancake.

"Hah! Silly surface dwellers. You only look like people of the sea, but you can't...why is the great fish getting bigger?"

Inside the fish, Jessica's puffer fish body was swelling, getting larger and larger. She drew in more and more water inside the fish, enjoying the feeling of expanding, but knowing she had to stay strong enough to fight her way through.

She couldn't see the outside to know it was working. The fish was visibly getting larger and more uncomfortable. Amber and the warrior were both getting nervous about what came next.

*BOOM*

Scraps of the big fish floated through the water. In its place was a massive neon purple puffer fish. Jessica herself had huge inflated eyes at this point, and probably pushed herself too far to escape the fish. She floated down towards a stalagmite, unable to control where she was swimming.

*POP!*

Jessica exploded, sending rubbery scraps of her body and torrents of water in all directions. The rush of water made the serpent warrior lose her balance, sending her back towards the cauldron.

"WHOOOOAH!"

The currents forced her onto the hot rocks around the vent, toppling the cauldron's bubbling pink, brown, and green mixture. She tried to push herself away, but the hot rocks were already sticking to melting scales. A massive bubble burped forth in that moment, quickening the warrior's melt down and scattering the serpent around the room.

* * *

"Wait a second." Jessica waved her hands at the table, wanting to get Zoe's attention. "You said pink, green, and brown was in the cauldron?

Zoe grinned. "Yup!"

Jess looked at Pepper's collection of pink, green, brown, and blue dice, and for the first time noticed the Converse star on the 12 side of the blue 12 siders. She reached across the table, and rearranged Pepper's dice into a rough stick figure.

"And wasn't Sonia supposed to be here with Pepper?" She pointed at the dice that matched Sonia's colors perfectly. The green circle behind the 20 on the head winked.

Jessica laughed and shook her head. "Oh, you two are evil."

Amber grabbed a big book, and dropped it on top of the Sonia dice.

*SQUISH*

Pepper briefly protested "Hey, I needed my lucky dice!" before sheepishly looking at Zoe. "So, uh, can I borrow some dice?"

Scarlett lifted up the book, revealing a messy flattened Sonia on the table. She reached over to help her out. "Oooooh Sonia! You made it! How are you?" She peeled her off the table with a *SHHHHHHHLLLLLRRRRP* and shook her out to a small three dimensional shape.

She dropped Sonia on an empty chair, and her tiny voice squeaked through the room. "Still dizzy! Thanks Scarlett." There was a puff of pink smoke that matched her blouse, and Sonia grew back to a normal size. "Pepper owes me one tonight now."

Pepper raised an eyebrow. "Oh really?"

"Well, technically, I didn't let you get flattened. I think that's what you said before turning me into dice."

Pepper nodded slowly, looking defeated. "Right. I just got chewed up, shot out a blowhole as a puddle, disintegrated, squeezed into a tube, frozen, and shattered."

Sonia held her hands together happily. "But not flattened!"

Zoe laughed through the shenanigans. "Glad you could join us Sonia. I hope you brought your character with you. But I think Scarlett still has one to deal with."

* * *

Scarlett floated in front of the remaining monstrous hag. The witch was juggling all manner of elemental energy between her hands. She licked her lips while sizing up Scarlett. "Well little miss fish, how do you want to die today?"

Scarlett's eyes glowed, and her body rippled in the water. She appeared to swim in circles impossibly fast in front of the hag, leaving after images behind, until there were seven Scarletts floating in the water. They spoke in a distorted echo, not quick in perfect unison. "Uuuuh, I'd rather not?"

"You think you're clever don't you." The hag narrowed her eyes, and started lobbing energy at the Scarletts. They scattered, letting fireballs and lightning crash into the walls behind her.

"Float still damn you!" The Hag's rage seemed to make it more accurate.

"AEEEEEEEEEE!" A fireball struck one Scarlett, briefly surrounding her in flames and leaving her charred. She crumbled to dust, leaving her blinking eyes suspended in the water, before it all vanished in a poof into red smoke.

The other five mermaids stuck their tongues out. "PTTTTTT Missed me!"

"Enough!" The hag lobbed lightning at a Scarlett.

"AYEAYEAYEAYEAYEAYE!" That Scarlett jerked around, her skeleton flashing as electricity coursed through her, before she too crumbled to dust and poofed away.

"Eek!" The other four Scarletts swam around evasively.

"Why! Won't! You! Die?!"

A flying rock crushed a Scarlett into a wall. The splattered Scarlett dripped off the wall, each drop poofing as it floated away.

A large glob of acid struck another, melting her flesh off her bones into a mess of red goop in the water. Her skeleton put her hands near her face, as if sticking its non-existant tongue out, before the illusion poofed away.

A flurry of knives cut through another, breaking her apart into cubes of Scarlett. The eyes blinked before each individual cube poofed out of existance.

A huge icicle struck the last visible Scarlett squarely in the chest, knocking her veils and seashells loose. Ice surrounded and coated her with a loud *CRRRRRCK* sound, she froze solid, and shattered apart into thousands of tiny shards of ice.

But like the rest, she disappeared in poofs of red smoke, leaving the blinking eyes to vanish last.

The hag, realizing they couldn't all be illusions, looked around frantically. "Wait, that was the last one! Where the hell is she?!"

The real Scarlett was invisible, swimming away the moment the hag started attacking. She was busy gathering the shattered fragments of Pepper, and piecing her ally back together. She finished attaching Pepper's arm when she heard the hag's rage from below.

"Oooof." Pepper cracked her restored neck. "That was cold Scarlett." She clapped a hand on Scarlett's invisible shoulder. "I think I know what to do from here. Hags haaaaaate music."

"How did you know that?"

"Bardic knowledge."

Pepper winked and gave a thumbs up, then darted down in the water with her tail swishing behind her. Once she was within earshot of the Hag, she took out her flute, and played her a sea shanty.

The hag immediately clasped her hands to her ears. "AAAAAARG! What is that music! How dare you play something happy around here?! YAAAAAAAAARG I CAN'T STAND IT!"

Pepper swam in close. She didn't want to waste time finding out how long she needed to play before the Hag crumbled from happy music, so she ran through the spells she knew. If sound was the weakness...

Pepper breathed in deep, and let loose the loudest, highest pitch sound her magically enhanced lungs could muster.

"LAAAAAAAAAAAAAAaAaAaAaAaAaAaAaAaA!"

Pepper's leaned into the sonic blast. Her mouth opened at least 4 feet wide, tongue and uvula thrashing from the force.

It worked. Dark lines spidered through the hag, shards of her body breaking off and scattering through the water.

"You'll!"
*CRRRRK*
"Never!"
*CCCRRRRRRKRKRKRK*
"Win!"
*KSSSSSH!!!"

The hag's green body completely shattered apart, floating around aimlessly in the cave.

* * *

"Well done!" Zoe gave the ladies a slow clap. "I'm guessing Jessica uses a scroll of polymorph conveniently left behind by the sea hags to let Sonia act underwater, and you get going?"

Pepper handed Sonia a small figurine of her Monk from the last game, and stuck a hastily drawn cardboard cutout of a pink mermaid tail on it.

Sonia smirked and put it with the other minis. "Aw, you remembered. Thanks hon."

"Well then." Zoe continued. "You swim through tunnels and enter another cavern. This one is large enough to be a noble's suite at an inn, so larger than a room, but not the massive caverns you've been swimming through. Lounging in a chair in the far corner, you see a cecaelia-"

Amber asked "What the heck is a cecaelia?"

Jessica responded. "Like a mermaid but half squid. Remember that villain in that mermaid movie?"

Amber nodded slowly. "Oh yeah, thanks!"

"Anyway, she has long black braided hair, black tentacles, and tan human skin."

Zoe winked before continuing. "She's holding a hoard of weapons, idly spinning two swords, a halberd, a mace, and several whips. You can see some aeon stones over her head, but the only things she's actually wearing are a thick gold necklace, and two strategically placed sea stars to cover her nips. The other things that catch your eyes in this room are the actual torture devices. She looks at all of you, and says 'Darlings, you're late for our evening of torment. How could you leave this waiting so long?' Just to drive her point home, she fluffs her boobs like this."

Zoe shamelessly and slowly demonstrated for the table, taking pains to exaggerate it.

"Now, she actually is throwing charm effects at you that demand will saves. Can everyone...wait where did Scarlett and Sonia go?"

"Blrrbrlrrrb..."

The sounds of melted woman splatting on the floor filled the room.

Amber and Pepper sighed and shrugged.

Jessica looked Zoe in the eye. "I think your players failed their will saves. We're going to need to mop them up."

Zoe cackled. "Yes! You owe a favor Amber."

Amber rolled her eyes. "Uuuugh. I really thought Scarlett was getting better about this."

Pepper was already running a finger through Sonia. "Aaaaw Sonia, let me gather you up so we can finish this at home."

Jessica rubbed her forehead with her arm resting on the table, and looked at Zoe. "You had this planned didn't you."

Zoe shrugged sheepishly. "I maaaaay have forgotten to actually make an end villain. I just did what I do best!"

"Really? Well, I think we take your character there and..." Jess leaned over to whisper in Zoe's ear. Zoe's eyes went wide in shock, not expecting Jessica to suggest such things.

"Jess, I didn't thi-pffft"
*PLOP*

Before she knew it, Zoe was collapsing into a goopy puddle herself, flowing off her chair into a mess on the floor. She forced her melting mouth back open. "We're trying that toblubblbl..."

Jessica laughed and got up. "Heh, she acts tough, but she melts just like the rest."

She looked to Amber and Pepper. "Alright then, as long as the game's over, you want anything else to drink?"