Lorrie woke and stretched.  That she’d slept in a sports bra yet again felt comfortingly familiar.  She giggled when she got a closer look at it.  This one was bright pink, with ‘The Real Lorrie’ printed across it in big purple letters.  “I know, I know.  I remember you doing that to me... er, yourself.”  She patted the bra and grinned impishly.  “I’m going to keep us like this for a while.  I doubt you will object.”

Lorrie carefully tied a ribbon around her wrist and around the bra before taking it off to have her shower.  While soaping herself up, she reminisced over the previous night’s activities.  Being reduced to a pair of breasts had been fun but Barry had definitely gotten the best of that deal.  He’d played with her for what felt like hours before restoring her and was comically apologetic when she’d asked him how much fun he'd thought it would be for her.

Oh, how he'd fussed once he was in this new body and ‘heard’ how much fun she'd really had.  Lorrie giggled again and made sure to make some extra-delicious memories for Barry to keep when she changed back.

Once she was finally out of the shower and both hair and body were dry, Lorrie put her Lorrie-bra back on, running her fingertips over the soft fabric.  She marveled anew at the fact she was wearing herself, then found her silkiest robe to wear over it.  The robe proved tighter around the chest than she’s remembered, so she left it half-open.  Lorrie posed in her mirror and grinned at her reflection.  “Looking good.  Get a good look, Barry.”

After breakfast she freed Pete, who said much the same.  He grinned when his playful leer was met by a saucy grin and a loosening of the robe.

“You’re in a good mood, Ms. D.  Did something change?”

Lorrie laughed.  “Everything changed.  Plus it’s Monday and I don’t have to work.”

“Want to help with the yard work like yesterday?”

“Not today.  I think I’ll finish up my paperwork so the rest of the week really is a vacation.”

Pete shook his head.  “Weren’t you just going on about not having to work?”

“Yeah, but this way Lorrie doesn’t have to.”

Pete did a double-take.  “You’re Barry?  Hah, that figures.  You always did work hard.  If they graded on effort you’d have had straight As.”

Lorrie thrust her chest out at Pete.  “Does this look like Barry?  He’s in there, but after spending all night like this it’s all me.”

“Are you sure?  Ms. D was never so outgoing.”  Pete was still staring at her chest.  “Or so big.  Is that Barry or the boobs talking?”

Lorrie stared down at her chest, then tried and failed to tug her robe closed.  “How on earth did I miss that?”

“Same way that bra of yours thinks it’s just a bra, I’d guess.  Speaking of which, can I get you to zap Gina into a wheelbarrow for me?”

Lorrie absently took care of Pete’s request, then turned the wand over in her hands.  Had it really changed her personality?  She walked to the back door Pete had wrangled the wheelbarrow through and imagined going outside in just her robe.  She grinned at how scandalized her neighbors would be.  That was how she’d always felt, right?  So why hadn’t she ever done it?

The ringing of the phone broke her out of her reverie.  The content of the call itself enraged her.  She had to share it with the real Lorrie, so the robe and bra come off, as did the ribbons.  Soon they were Barry and Lorrie again.  Lorrie purred happily as she changed back, and was in the middle of pouting about changing back “so soon” when she realized she was standing naked by the back door.  She snatched up her robe to cover up her nakedness and rushed for the bedroom, scolding Barry for changing her back where she could be seen.

Once she’d wound down, Barry told her about the call from the school.

“An administrative meeting?  What for?”

“To discuss your suspension on suspicion of having ‘improper contact’ with a student.”

“They found out about you?”

“I'm not a student now, and I was never in any of your classes.  We didn’t do anything wrong!” Barry shouted.

“I know that,” Lorrie agreed, gesturing for calm and eyeing the wand that was still in Barry’s hands.  “And you know that.  But this wouldn’t be the first time that people jumped to conclusions and someone innocent was punished for it.”

“But that’s...”  He stopped, shaking with frustration.  “God!” he shouted, gesticulating wildly.  “I can’t believe this shit!”

“BARRY!”

Lorrie’s shout cut off his rant.  Focusing on her, his eyes shot open as she appeared to be melting.  Quickly, he looked down at his hand and the wand that was in it.  The wand that was pointing in her direction.  Looking back up, he saw that his lover was gone.  In her place was a burlap sack.  Clearly marked on the outside was what it contained.

"Shit!" Barry shouted.  "Lorrie, I'm sorry."  He quickly pointed the wand at the sack.  "Restore!  Restore!"

“Ugh,” exclaimed Lorrie as soon as she had a face again.  “That was truly vile.  What have I told you about language, young man?”

Barry hung his head, and held out the wand.  He made sure to keep the tip pointing away from her this time.  “Sorry, Ms. D.”

Lorrie took the wand.  “You’re forgiven.  It was an accident.  And if it had been something less noxious... the melty part could have been good.”

“Really?” asked Barry, lifting his gaze to reassure himself Lorrie wasn’t mad.

“But not now.  I think we need some time as ourselves.  And to figure out this meeting.  When did you say it was?”

“Tomorrow afternoon.”

“Okay.  That gives us the day to get ready.  Did they say to bring anything?”

Barry shook his head.  “Just to be ready to defend your actions.”

Lorrie snickered.  “So I should bring the wand, then?”

“Is that a good idea?  Transforming the committee isn’t likely to improve things.”

“Might make me feel better, though.  I bet this is all Denise’s doing.  She’s hated me since I arrived.”

“Ms. Carter, the history teacher?  Yeah, she was definitely hottest teacher in the school until you arrived.  The way she looks at you when she thinks nobody’s watching, I’m surprised your dresses don’t catch fire.”

Lorrie blinked at that.  “It’s because she thinks I’m prettier than she is?  What is this, some kind of fairy tale?”

“Well, we do have a magic wand involved,” noted Barry with a grin.  “I don’t think she has a magic mirror, but she is the evil queen of the school.”

Lorrie rolled her eyes.  “She’s not that bad.”

“Says the woman who got stuck with Friday detentions every week.  You know that normally gets shared around all the teachers, not just dumped on the newest one, right?”

Lorrie shrugged.  “I didn’t see the point in fighting it.  Not when I realized nobody was there to watch what I did.  I turned a particularly mouthy kid into a bra, and look where we are now.”

“I’d say I was sorry, but I am so not sorry I got turned into your bra.”

“Neither am I.  About turning you into my bra, that is.”

“Or being your own bra, from your reaction earlier.”

Lorrie sighed wistfully.  “I was looking forward to spending the day like that.  But no.  Stupid meeting.  On the plus side, if I am suspended, I’d have the summer off.”

“And I was hoping to help you get your paperwork done early.”

“You were?  Sweet boy.”  Lorrie got a speculative look on her face then aimed the wand at Barry. “Lorrie.”

Soon her twin was standing in front of her, dressed as she was.  “Huh.  This feels different from this morning.”

“How so?  Wait, you can remember this morning as me?”

Lorrie spun around, letting her robe flare out.  “Yeah.  I felt way less inhibited about showing off my sexy body.”  She frowned.  “Maybe that’s because it’s the sort of mind I thought a big-chested woman would have?”

Lorrie giggled at her twin.  “Next time we’ll turn you into a stripper.”

Lorrie giggled back.  “Or a sex-obsessed lesbian.”

Lorrie licked her lips.  “No time like the present.  Those papers will still be there Wednesday.  Slutty lesbian.”

Her target shook her head.  “Nope, didn’t work.  I have no idea what a lesbian looks like, as distinct from any other woman.”

“Huh.  Fine.  Stripper.”

A shudder went through Lorrie’s body and then her chest started to grow, even bigger than before.  “Ohhhh.  Yeah, that’s the stuff.”  She dropped her robe and pulled Lorrie into an embrace then tumbled them both to the bed.

Soon, both Lorries were competing to see who could have the biggest chest and the most provocative attitude, with each change accompanied by yet another romp on the bed or in the shower, or on the floor, or in the kitchen.  Which was where Pete found them when he came in looking for lunch.

“Don’t stop on my account,” he said with a chuckle.  

They didn’t.

When Gina changed from wheelbarrow to woman the Lorries finally came up for air.  She was standing snuggled against Pete, eyes wide.  “Ms. D?”

The Lorries nodded.  “Well, one of us is Barry.”

At the way they were looking at Pete, Gina stepped in front of him. “Mine.”

“Fine.”  Two restores later, Barry was lounging in the kitchen while Lorrie dashed to her bedroom to fetch a robe.

When Lorrie returned, Pete was holding Gina tight to help with the tremors.  “Still bad?” she asked gently.

“N... not as bad as before,” said Gina.  “Fucking drugs are fading.  Slowly.  Change me?”

“Of course.  T-shirt.”

Pete laughed, and picked up the result.  “Should I wear her?”

“That was the idea, yes.  Your clothes are looking the worse for wear.”

Pete had to agree she had a point.  After lunch, he headed home to pick up some clothes much as Barry had.

“Running a boarding house now, are you?” asked Barry once he was alone with Lorrie.

“For wayward youths with a penchant for being clothing?  Think we’ll find more of them?”

Barry shrugged.  “Who knows.  But you have lots of space in your drawers, you could handle more.”

Lorrie laughed.  “I suppose I could at that.  Would you mind?”

Barry shook his head.  “The more the merrier.”

“Right answer, stud.”

Barry looked down at the wand in Lorrie’s hand, eyes widening.  “Uh oh.”  His body compressed, becoming a simple piece of lumber.

Lorrie stared at in confusion for a minute before restoring it.  “What was that about?”

“To someone who’s helped their Dad renovate houses, a stud is a two-by-four.  Sorry.”  Barry’s grin clearly indicated that he was not.

“Huh.  So what’s a good word for a male equivalent of what we like earlier?”

“Hung like a horse?”

Lorrie giggled.  “It might end up being too literal.”

“A centaur, then?”

“Kind of hard on the floors.”

“You could try turnabout from last night...”

Lorrie’s eyes sparkled with mischief.  “You wouldn’t mind?”

“You didn’t,” replied Barry with a huge grin.

“Cock.”

Lorrie spent the next ten minutes chasing a rooster around the kitchen.

* * *

Lorraine hadn’t really believed Barry and Pete’s tales of how Denise was queen bee of the school, until she saw the way the curvy, perfectly tanned woman was sitting next to Principal Jeffries.  The look the balding man was giving Denise could be best described as besotted.  This was not going to go well.  She squared her shoulders and marched into the boardroom, to be met by an evil grin from her nemesis.

Flanking them were two other teachers.  To Denise’s right sat Lucy, much to Lorraine’s surprise.  Lucy was the one person at the school she considered a friend.  She’d advised Lorrie to dress in a more businesslike fashion to try to avoid Denise’s wrath, and it had helped some.  Her horn-rimmed glasses were such an old-fashioned touch that they always made Lorrie smile.

To the other side of Principal Jeffries sat one of the few male teachers in the school, Mr. Tomlinson.  If the rumours were true he was the only man at the school who’d resisted Denise’s advances.  Some of the kids thought he was a monk, and between his carefully shaved head, lean physique, and expertise at the martial arts he taught the kids in gym class, it was more than plausible.  His penchant for saffron-coloured shirts did nothing to dispel it.

Edgar Jeffries waved his recalcitrant teacher to the one seat before the boardroom table.  “Good, you’re here on time.  Let’s get this over with.”

“Nice to see you too, Principal Jeffries,” said Lorraine as she approached the table.  She arranged her skirt carefully as she sat in the indicated chair, then waited.

“Ms. Dennison, I’ve called this meeting to discuss some irregularities that I’ve just been made aware of.  Your... relationship with Barry Sanders is only part of the issue.”

“What are you talking about, Mr. Jeffries?”

“You’ve had a free hand with how to handle students in detention Friday nights.  Frankly, your results with them were remarkable, so I overlooked the rumours.  However, the superintendent takes matters of teacher-student relationships very seriously indeed, and now we have to look closer.”

Lorraine sighed.  “There was no relationship before school ended for the summer.  Barry graduated, so he was no longer a student at that point.”

“Oh.  Well that puts a different light on it.”  Edgar looked startled when Denise pulled him tight against her.  Her long dark hair shrouded his face as she hissed something in his ear.  When he straightened up, it was with an entirely different expression.  “Do you expect me to believe a nineteen year old punk like him was willing to wait until school was formally over?  Or that a...”

Lorraine's hand clenched around the wand in her purse.  Lucy saw the hardness in her eyes and spoke up on her behalf.  “Choose your next words very carefully, Ed.”

“That a fine, attractive woman like you would...”  Edgar winced at the glare he was getting from Denise.  “Look, can we just get to the bottom of the whole ‘turning students into things’ rumours?  It sounds like you were giving them drugs.”

“No.  I was actually turning them into things.”

“That seems rather improbable.  If you had access to that kind of magic, why are you here at all?”

“I’m beginning to wonder the same thing myself.  If I prove to your satisfaction that I can turn people into things, will you drop this ‘investigation’?”

Principal Jeffries looked to the other teachers, who were all staring curiously at Ms. Dennison.  “Denise?  What do you think?”

Denise shook her head and glared daggers at Lorraine.  “There’s no way this mouse has that kind of power.”

Lorrie raised an eyebrow.  “Really?  And if I say I can prove it to all your satisfaction?”

“Show me.”

Lorrie pulled the wand from her purse.  “Doughnut.”

“What?” asked Denise.  Then she stared at her hands which were shrinking before her eyes, becoming glazed with sugar.  She leaned forward over the table to glare at Lorraine.  “What did...”

Denise crumpled to the table, shrinking further until all that was left of the history teacher was a delicious smelling apple fritter.

“Denise!” cried the principal, staring in dismay at the baked goods he’d been snuggling only minutes before.  He touched it, as if to confirm it was real.  “What did you do?”

“What I said I could do.  Do you believe me now?” asked Lorraine, doing her best to hide a smug grin.

“Is she stuck?”

“She’ll change back in a few hours, none the worse for wear.  At least, as long as nobody eats her,” said Lorrie teasingly.  “Mmm, she does smell good.”  Lorrie grinned at the way Edgar licked his lips when she said that.  “Think you can leave her alone for that long?”

That got his attention.  “What are you implying?”

“Me?” asked Lorraine, innocently.  “Nothing save that you could stand to lose a few pounds, and that Denise seems to know your... weakness.”

Principal Jeffries glowered at Lorraine.  “I am not having a relationship with that woman!”

“I never said anything of the sort,” said Lorraine, calmly.  “But her absence is certainly rattling you.”  She studied his face, and the way he was sweating.  “She put you up to this.”

Edgar looked away from Denise, his gaze drawn to the doughnut sitting on the table.  “Change her back.”

“Not until this is settled.”

“You’d blackmail me with the wand?  Why not just transform all of us?”

The other teachers looked at him in alarm, edging away from the table.  Lorraine smiled at the principal frostily.  “I am not that sort of person.  She will be fine.  So will you.”

“Is carrying a wand around like that even legal?” asked Mr. Tomlinson.

“I have a concealed weapon permit, Steve.  It’s an excellent defensive weapon, it can disable an attacker without doing them permanent harm.  It’s not like a skirt can do anything to you.”  She watched as he collapsed into a saffron-coloured heap fabric.  “See?”

“Ms. Dennison!  I won’t have this.”

“Then make your decision.  I did no harm to any student, and some came to appreciate the peace of being an object for a time.”  She pointed the wand at the skirt lying on Steve’s chair.  “Restore.”

The skirt had slithered off the chair, so Steve emerged entangled with it.  Once he’d freed himself he flicked through a very brief set of exercises as if to reassure himself of his control of his body.  He bowed to Lorrie then resumed his seat as if nothing had happened.

“How are you feeling, Steve?” asked the principal.

“That was unsettling.  Hard to center.  Not actually unpleasant.  I vote we leave her be.”

“That was how you voted before the meeting started, too.  Lucy?”

The other teacher studied Lorraine, her eyes drawn to the wand.  “You know what?  Hit me, and I’ll see if that changes my mind.”

Lorrie grinned.  “Works for me.  Lingerie.”  The other teacher watched in rapt attention as her arms reduced to hollow fabric.  She settled to her chair as a confection of silk and lace.  Lorraine waited a half-minute, then restored her.

“Hm,” was all she said.  But her gaze remained on the wand.

“So.  Am I suspended, or not?  It’s not like I’d object to being off for the summer, but I’d rather not have a black mark on my record.”

“Ahem.  Yes, right.”  Principal Jeffries looked away from the doughnut his hand had been edging toward.  “All in favour of putting Ms. Dennison on unofficial leave until September?”

“Fine by me,” said Mr. Tomlinson.  “Not that it matters, you have final say.”

“Who’ll take her classes over the summer?” asked Lucy.

“I’m sure we can find someone who needs the money,” said the principal.  “Any other issues?”

“None that you can address,” said Lucy, eyes fixed on Lorrie’s.

Principal Jeffries shook his head.  “Be that way.  I’ll see you both in September, and we’ll try to have some kind of policy in place for the use of magic in detentions.”

“Thank you,” said Lorrie.  She stood up and turned toward the door.  Behind her, she heard the scrape of a chair.

“Wait!” called Edgar.

Lorrie turned to face him, noting that Lucy was already up and walking around the table.  “Is there a problem?” she asked sweetly.

Edgar snatched his hand back from the doughnut.  “I don’t think I can resist the temptation.  Do something.”

Lorrie smiled.  “But of course.  Would you like to join her?  An eclair would pair nicely...”

“No!”

The wand flicked at the doughnut instead.  “Restore.”

For just a moment, Lorrie could have sworn that the restored teacher had horns, and a long, pointed tail.  Denise shot her a snake-eyed look full of venom, making Lorrie flinch.  When she looked back the other woman seemed normal again.  Lorrie held her composure and walked calmly to the door, then quickened her stride to get out of the building as soon as she could.

Lucy was only a few steps behind.  “What spooked you back there?”

“I could have sworn I saw Denise...  Has she been spending a lot of time with the male teachers?”

Lucy shrugged.  “She always does.  She’s been responsible for at least three divorces that I’ve heard of.  Edgar keeps sweeping it under the rug, and we all know why.”

Lorrie shook her head and started walking toward her car at a more reasoned pace.  “Sad.  Maybe I should try to transfer out of here.”

“Good luck with that,” said Lucy, falling in beside Lorrie.  “Once you’ve got a couple more years, maybe.  I’m still trying, and I’ve been here for three.  One more year should do it.”

“Ah.  Well, it’s only a few years.  And I seem to be having an impact on the kids, so maybe it’s worth it.”

“Not just the kids,” said Lucy softly.

Lorrie stopped and turned to face her.  “Sorry?”

“I...  Look, it’s silly, maybe I shouldn’t...”

“Ask.  I’m in the mood for silly after that.”

Lucy smiled.  “What else can the wand turn me into?”

Lorrie grinned back at her excitedly.  “Oh!  I can accommodate you there.  Things are safest, because animals have their own minds, and do their own thing.  Too easy to get lost, you understand, and a burrowing animal might not come back to somewhere that you can change back in time.”

“And people?”

“Same deal.  Even changing you a little would leave you prisoner in your own mind.  Granted, with a familiar jailer, if you’re modelled on yourself.”  Lorrie went on to describe her experiences with being a big-chested version of herself.

“I...  Wow.  I’d be tempted to spend a few days down at Miss Kitty’s like that.  Especially if I could have a body that nobody from the school would recognize.”

“Lucy!  I would never have taken you for an exhibitionist.”

Lucy smiled brazenly.  “I’ve done it before.  It’s not guys I’d like to dance for, though.”

Lorrie looked Lucy over curiously.  As she did so, Lucy took off her ugly horn-rimmed glasses, and pulled her hair out its severe bun.  When she shook her hair out, Lorrie was stunned at the realization.  “You’re pretty!” she exclaimed.

Lucy looked down at the glasses in her hands, turning them over and over.  “Protective camouflage.  Denise made my life hell when I got here, just like you.  I took the easy route out, ditched the makeup and bound my hair and my chest.”  She held up the glasses.  “These aren’t even prescription, just tinted a little.”

Lorrie stared into Lucy’s brilliant blue eyes.  “I can see why.  With a little makeup...”

“I’m wearing makeup.  Deliberately done to make myself look older.”  Lucy wiped the crows-feet out of the corners of her eyes with her thumb, leaving faint smudges behind.

“That’s...  Wow.  I would never have thought of that.”

“Nor did I.  Mary pulled me aside on my third day, and gave me tips on covering up so Denise would forget about me.  I wasn’t her first, far from it.”

“How long has she been doing this?”

“At least a dozen years.”

Lorrie started pacing toward the car again, brow furrowed.  “Older than she looks, goes through men like candy... Do they tend to look old and weak when she’s done with them?”

“Some, yeah.”

“I need to get back to my place and talk to someone about this.”

“Can I come with you?” asked Lucy, reaching for Lorrie’s hand, but stopping just short of touching her.

Lorrie studied her once more.  Lucy looked fretful but hopeful.  “Do you have a car here?”

“I take the bus.”

Lorrie drove both of them back to her place.  Pete was out front weeding, and waved when they arrived.  “Hey Ms. Slater.”

“Pete’s here too?”

“And Gina,” said Pete, holding up the weeding tool he was using.

“Barry provided support during the meeting,” added Lorrie, patting her chest.

“You’re awfully casual about turning people into things,” said Lucy.

Lorrie shook her head.  “I suppose.  It has gotten a little out of hand.”

“I hope you’re planning on it getting even more out of hand,” said Pete.  “Looks like you’ve acquired another volunteer.”

Lucy grinned.  “Is that what you’re calling it?  I was hoping for plaything.  Or decoration.”  She glanced over at Lorrie with a sly look.  “Or gilding the lily.”

“You were lingerie for less than a minute and now you want... what exactly?” asked Lorrie.

“I know you don’t swing my way,” said Lucy, looking away.  “But I’d love to be that again, and used to show your body off.”

Lorrie reached out to cup Lucy’s chin, and draw her gaze back to her face.  “What makes you think I’m going to reject you?”

Lucy blushed prettily, then leaned in toward Lorrie.  She was met with a kiss, one that went on for long enough that Pete started cheering.  The two women broke away, looking anywhere but each other or Pete.

“Wow.”

“Yeah.”

“What’s Barry going to think?”

“Barry who?  I have a bra that used to be Barry, but bras don’t get a say in what their owners do.”

Lucy gasped, while Pete just grinned and watched.  “Lorrie!” she exclaimed.  “You’re not going to turn him back?”

Lorrie laughed, and hugged Lucy tight.  “He loves being my bra.  And being human... and a woman, at least some of the time.  We’ll work something out.  Maybe I can take turns wearing one or the other of you.”

Lucy grinned and snuggled up against Lorrie.  “Sounds good to me.”

Pete coughed when the next kiss went on even longer.  “So.  How’d the meeting go?”

Lorrie startled, and pulled away from Lucy.  “Right!  I have the summer off, no black mark against my name, and I suspect Denise is a demon too.  Think Gina will be in any shape to talk?”

Pete nodded.  “Turn her into another me, and I’ll let her do the talking.”

Lucy looked confused.  “Why would you do that?”

Lorrie explained about the long term side-effects of the antipsychotic medicines Gina had been on, and that she was spending time not human to avoid them.  Lucy nodded.  “But shouldn’t you turn her into me or you?  She’d probably be happier in a female body.”

Pete grinned.  “She’d like that, yeah.  Wish I’d thought of it earlier.  It won’t be weird if I kiss her while she’s you, will it?”

Lorrie laughed.  “This whole thing is weird.  How can I have found not only one, but four people who want me to change them?”  She led the others into the house, and closed the drapes to avoid any prying eyes.

Soon Pete’s weeder was another copy of Lorrie, and smiling at her twin.  “Well.  This should prove interesting.”  She lay back on the couch, and after a minute slowly sat up again.

“Gina?” asked Pete.

“Yeah.  This is trippy.  But better than being an icky, sweaty boy.”

Pete laughed, and rushed to her side to hug her tight.  Lorrie flailed for a bit before she relaxed and let Gina have control.  Pete sat beside the Gina-Lorrie and turned to the others.  “So.  What’s this about a demon?”

“I turned Denise into a doughnut during the meeting.”  Lorrie was interrupted by cheers from Pete and Gina-Lorrie.  Lucy joined in, then patted Lorrie’s leg and motioned for her to continue.  “When I restored her, for a moment she had horns, a tail, and wicked, slitted eyes.”

“Duh.  I’ve been trying to tell anyone that would listen that Denise was a demon,” said Gina-Lorrie. “Nobody listened to the drug-addled crazy girl.”

“To be fair,” added Lucy, “Most of us agreed with you privately.  Just... not so concretely.”

“She’s not the only one, either.”

Lorrie swore, drawing gasps of surprise from everyone in the room.  “How many?”

“Four that I know of.  Two others that I never saw, but from the way Mom talked about them... probably.”

“Six demons?  What are we going to do?” worried Lorrie.

“Why do we have to do anything at all?” asked Pete.

Lorrie gave him a well practiced withering look.  “Because we can.  And from the runaround I got trying to file paperwork to carry the wand, nobody in the government has the slightest clue what to do about magic.”