KittenFun

Sally paced nervously in her booth, fidgeting with her long blonde hair.  She’d only been working for TransFun for a month, and now TransCon was here and they needed all hands on deck.  Someone with a clipboard had asked her if she liked kittens, and now here she was in a display booth for a product she barely understood.

A short brunette stuck her head into the booth, and smiled at Sally.  “How are you holding up?”

“I’ll survive.  I think.”

“Just smile and give the spiel.  Cheat off the cards if you have to.  You’ll do fine.  I’ll check on you again in a bit.”

“Thanks, Crystal.”  Sally flashed her friend a nervous smile.  “Maybe I should have volunteered to be a guinea pig after all.”

“Silly, you’re not showing off guinea pigs, that’s across the hall.  You’ve got kittens.”

Sally giggled.  “Yeah.”  She crouched down beside the fenced-in area that took up most of the booth, and offered her hand to one of fluffy grey kittens inside.  It pounced on her hand, and mock-wrestled with it ferociously.  That cheered her up, putting a smile on her face when the first attendees came by.

“So what is this all about, anyway?” asked a tall guy in a ‘TransFun: Putting the Fun in Transformation’ T-shirt and an attendee badge that gave his name as ‘Greg’.

Sally launched into her prepared spiel about how TransFun was working on forms with enhanced instincts.  She concluded with, “Instead of just being shaped like a kitten, you get to really be a kitten.”

“Why kittens?” he asked.

“Well, the instincts are strong enough that you pretty much act like the animal would.  Might be a bad idea to do that with a tiger.”

Greg chuckled.  “I guess.  So you really get forced to act like an animal?  How is that cool?”

“I...”  Sally shrugged.  “I don’t know.”

The handful of people that had gathered as she was talking muttered among themselves, then wandered off to other booths.  Sally called out, “I have samples!” to their backs, but nobody turned around.

The same scene repeated over a few times before Crystal came to her rescue.

“I don’t know what I’m doing wrong!” groused Sally.  “They seem interested, but only as a curiosity.  Nobody’s asking to try it.”

“So get a volunteer from the staff.”

“Want to be a kitten in mind and body for fifteen minutes?” Sally asked, hopefully.

“Uh...”

“Yeah.  Heck, I’d change myself if it would get attention.”

Crystal grinned.  “I can spare the time to cover your booth for fifteen minutes.  Let’s get a little crowd gathered, and give them a show.”

Sally worried at her hair, wringing it in her hands, then nodded. “OK.”  She raised her voice.  “Hey everyone!  I’m going to turn myself into a kitten, come watch!”

As heads turned, Sally launched into her familiar spiel.  This time, when the inevitable questions came, she said.  “I don’t know... but we’re about to find out.”  She held up a little vial so everyone could see, then downed the contents.

Sally didn’t even notice the taste, the shock of change hit her quickly.  She made a sound halfway between a yelp and and a meow of surprise as her body suddenly shrank.  Moments later she was batting her way out of her clothes.  Giant hands scooped her up, shattering her concentration. It was already hard to think, and having these enormous things tying a... thingy around her neck didn’t... what?  She grabbed at her memories, missed, came up empty.  Name...  She had a name, didn’t she?  

The kitten stared fearfully out at the world around it, comprehending nothing.  As the brightly coloured thing settled about its neck, she gave a little mew of confusion.  She repeated the sound, liking it, and decided it would do to identify herself.

Miou hopped out of the giant hands, and charged into the pile of squirming, tussling kittens, jumping into the fray with a will.

“And there you have it, ladies and gentlemen,” called out Crystal.  “She’s a kitten.  Her ribbon looks just like all the others, but in fourteen minutes the charm will start blinking, so I can get her into the changing booth.  No peep-shows here.  Save that for your homes.”

Most of the people in the crowd chuckled, and several stayed, watching the kittens play.  Crystal invited them to step into the ring to play with the kittens themselves.  Either as humans, or as kittens.  Three took her up on the offer, and one took a vial.

Miou mewled petulantly as the giant hands lifted her away from her play.  The hands petted and scritched her under the chin.  Distracted, she started purring happily, and was still purring as her body flowed and grew up into human again.  

Sally blinked, and stared at Crystal.  “Woah.  I was...  Wow.  I wasn’t even me any more.”

Crystal handed Sally her clothes, surprising her.  Sally hadn’t even noticed she was naked.  She dressed quickly, and emerged to scattered applause.

“So,” Sally asked when it died down.  “Any questions?”

This time, she had the answers.  Why?  Because being just a kitten was ever so much fun.  Bundles of energy, no worries... she already started to sound wistful about that.

After that, there was a steady stream of volunteers to play with the kittens, with about one in four trying out the vial.

Greg wandered back to the booth with a friend of his, looking a bit dazed.  “I can’t believe you just spent fifteen minutes as that chick’s dress, Barry.”

“And I’d do it again, too.  You should get a girl vial, and wear me.”

“Ew.  That would be too creepy.  We’re buddies, not... that.”

“Hi Greg,” called out Sally.  “Game to try out being a kitten to get that image out of your head?  Kittens don’t think about things like that.”

Greg laughed.  “I bet.  No, I’ll just...”  He looked into the enclosure. “You have more kittens now.”

“Yup.  Can you tell which ones are human, and which started the day as kittens?”

Greg and Barry watched the kittens.  The charm around one kitten’s neck started to blink, and Sally scooped it up.  A minute later, a matronly looking woman emerged from the curtained off changing area.  She linked arms with a man about her age, and couldn’t stop gushing about how much fun it had been.

Sally pointed out that they had longer duration vials for sale, but noted that if she wanted one she’d have to sign the relevant paperwork.  No long-term changes were allowed at convention without a waiver.  

“I could spend the whole weekend as a kitten?” asked the woman, wonderingly.

Sally nodded, and handed her a clipboard with the form.  The woman signed eagerly for a two-day change, and a minute later she was bundled up in her husband’s hands, a kitten once more.  He tucked her into a TransFun souvenir bag, her head poking out and watching the world with wide-eyed wonder.

“Well, there goes a happy customer,” grinned Sally.

“She... she was just like a kitten,” said Greg.

“Yup.  Think you can spot any of the other humans in here?”

Greg and Barry exchanged a look.  “Bet you I spot the next one,” challenged Greg.

“You’re on,” said Barry.

Two minutes later, another charm started blinking.  As Sally scooped up the kitten, Greg cheered.  “I win!”

Barry shrugged.  “Whatever.  So what do you win?”

Sally overheard the exchange, and held up a vial with a grin.  “Does this go to the winner, or the loser?”

Greg gestured to Barry, who shrugged.  “Sure.  Looks like fun.”  A minute later, another kitten was tussling with the rest.

Once Barry changed back, he challenged Greg once more, and several other people started to bet on which kitten would change back next as well.  Each time someone won, Sally got another ‘volunteer’ to join the kitten pen.  She wished she’d hit on this promotional gimmick earlier.

Barry ended up back in the pen three more times.  Greg just shook his head when Barry changed back the fourth time.  “You suck at this, dude.”

Barry just grinned.  “Being a kitten is something else.  They’re... free.  No worries, no stress.  Better than being a dress, even.  They’re just so alive.”

“Hmf.  You still suck at picking kittens.”

“That’s assuming I want to...”  Barry drawled.

“You’re losing on purpose?  I don’t buy it.  You just suck.”

Barry picked the next three kittens straight, then handed all three vials to Greg.  “You get to spend the next forty-five minutes as a kitten.  Have fun.”

Every time Greg returned to human, Barry was there with the next vial.  By the time the third was up, Greg could hardly remember his own name.  He signed the paperwork that Barry set in front of him in a daze, and soon another kitten was being carried out of the convention hall.

As the afternoon wore on, Sally noticed a trend recurring.  Everyone who’d tried out being a kitten came back, often more than once.  And by the end of the day, over half of them had signed up for a day, or two, or even a week as a kitten.

Crystal approached her as the convention started to wind down.  “I hear you’ve been making a lot of converts to the kitten cause.  Did you have fun?”

“I did,” said Sally, with a wistful look at the kitten pen.  “It’s just...”

“Hm?”

“So many of them signed up for longer changes.  So many gushed about how they loved being a kitten.  A lot put in orders for more vials to be delivered.”

“That’s good, right?  Marketing’s going to be happy with you.”

“I don’t care,” Sally whispered.  “I just want to go back.”

“Back to...”  Crystal followed her gaze.  “Ah.  Okay.  We’ve got a little time...”

“No.  Longer.”

Crystal shrugged.  “Not like you’d be the first employee... we’re going to be short-staffed next week, I bet.”  She handed the clipboard to Sally, who signed quickly and handed it back.

“Wait.”  Crystal frowned.  “You’ve left the duration field blank.  I could write anything in.”

“I didn’t know if ‘indefinite’ was a valid date.”

“Yeah, there’s a check-box for it right here.  Just initial here...  OK, you’re good.”

Crystal dug through the display case for a specific vial.  “Ah, thought we stocked a few of these.  We reverse-engineered ChangeLovers’s trigger mechanism.  This one will last until you hear the reversal phrase.”

Sally snatched it from Crystal’s hand and had chugged it before she finished speaking.  “Wait... why haven’t I changed yet?”

“Because I haven’t asked ‘who’s a good little kitty?’”

The change hit Sally faster this time, and a moment later Miou scampered out of the pile of clothes.  Crystal took a ribbon off one of the real kittens, and put it around Miou’s neck.  “There.  I hope you end up where you want to be.  They’re giving the kittens away after the convention is over.”

Miou was happy, and even if she had understood the words, she wouldn’t have cared.

* * *

“I’m sorry about this, Ma’am.  Apparently you got the wrong kitten after the convention.”

“The wrong kitten?  But... she’s just any other cat.  My daughter loves her, you can’t take her away.”

Crystal spoke again.  “Who’s a big bad wolf?”

The kitten scampering in the living room swelled and was suddenly human once more.  She stared around confusedly as Crystal draped a robe over her shoulders.  The little girl who’d been playing with the kitten started to wail.

“She was a human this whole time?” said the girl’s mother, aghast.

“Yup.  Terribly sorry about that.  I can offer you a replacement kitten...”  Crystal held up a carrier with the kitten she’d liberated in Sally’s place.  Soon the daughter was distracted once more, and Crystal could lead Sally away.

Once they were clear of the apartment, Crystal asked, “Are you back yet?”

“Meh.”

“Took a while to find you, this was my third stop.  Had enough of being a kitten, yet?”

Sally made a face, and hissed.  “Yeah.  Their kid played way too rough.  I just wanted to be with other kittens, to be loved and snuggled...  Not getting that was so confusing.”

“So if I offered to love and snuggle you up like a proper kitten should be...”

“Yes.”

“You didn’t let me finish.”

“Don’t care.  You have my indefinite paperwork still?”

“Yeah.”

Sally just held out her hand, and Crystal put a vial in it.  Sally popped the top and quaffed the vial without looking at the label, then nodded at Crystal.

“Who’s a good little kitten?”

Miou purred happily as her new owner scooped her up.