Maiden Voyage, Part Five (the end)

"Nikki! Nikki! Wake up!" I was pounding at her cabin door. I had to talk to her.

"What's up?" she asked sleepily when she opened the door, her bathrobe pulled loosely around her.

"I have to talk to you."

She led me into her cabin, where I began to pace nervously and unsteadily on my heels.

"Nikki...Duke kissed me."

Nikki rubbed her eyes groggily. "He's kissed you before. What's the big deal?"

"I mean, we were alone. And I let him kiss me."

"I guess if he took you by surprise..."

I sighed. I pulled on one of Nikki's tops over my almost bare torso. "Well, I kissed back. We kissed."

Nikki smirked for a second, which she immediately hid. "You two have been playing the newlyweds for a quarter of a year. You just got caught up in things."

"Yeah. That's it. Sorry to have bothered you." I turned to go.

"Andy? Is there something else?"

"It's just that that was the first time I've ever kissed anyone. It's a little weird."

"You mean it's the first time you've kissed a man."

"No, the first time I kissed anyone. I always assumed I'd kiss a girl first."

Nikki was looking at me in a strange way. Eventually she picked up the phone and called the galley. "Could you bring us some tea? Thank you." She then turned back to me.

"Andy, how old are you?"

"Nineteen."

"And you've never kissed anyone?"

"I was homeless. There's no chance to..." But then I stopped. Living on the streets meant you didn't date...but there was still a chance for romance. There were married homeless couples. Discrete liaisons in alleys and abandoned cars. There was sex.

I thought back to poor desperate women who needed warmth. Runaways, punks, the borderline crazy, who'd approached me, asking to be held. Hooker acquaintances who'd offered freebies. Even women with homes who implied I could share their bed for a night. Why had I never accepted?

"Andy? What are you thinking about?"

"I'm trying to think of the last time I've ever thought about a sexy woman." Even in city parks, where the muscular women jogged in their athletic bras and co-eds sunbathed in bikinis...I never really looked. I always chalked it up to being too poor for romance. Could there have been another reason?

I thought of the burly men who I used to work with. How I'd occasionally catch myself watching their brawny, bare backs. The closeness of the homeless shelter, the smell of unwashed male bodies...men. The way Duke held me when we danced.

"Nikki..." I said with a shiver in my voice. "You don't suppose I could be...I mean, I never thought I might be a ..."

"Shh. It doesn't matter. It's not something you have to decide overnight. Just remember, if it is true, you have nothing to be ashamed of."

There was a knock on the door and the steward entered with our tea. I ducked into the bathroom as my thoughts raged. Me? A queer? It would explain a few things.

When I heard the door close, I returned to the cabin. "But even if I were...that way...that doesn't explain everything. Look at me!" I tore open my shirt, showing Nikki the torso of a young lady. "I've become a woman! That's not part of being gay! Oh God, how did I let this happen?" I started to cry.

Nikki sat me down and put her arms around me. I sobbed on her shoulders. "Andy, maybe you've made some mistakes. Maybe you haven't. But listen to me. When I was your age--and that was longer ago that you think--I made some big mistakes. BIG mistakes. But if you go through life regretting everything in your past, you'll never have a future."

"So what should I do? Avoid Duke? Divorce him like I planned?"

Nikki poured me some tea. "You don't have to decide that now. You don't have to decide that for three of four months, when we get back to Georgia."

"Wait...that's only six or seven months at sea. I thought we were going to be gone a year."

Nikki sipped her tea. "Well, we skipped quite a few stops. Duke had originally planned a lot more alone time with you. Well, with your sister."

***

The next day, as I was dining alone on deck, I felt something slip around my neck. Duke's lucky he had lulled me into a sense of security. If he'd tried that two months ago, I'd have cracked his ribs before I'd realized what was happening.
I looked down at the pearl necklace my husband had slipped around my neck.

"Oh, Duke, it's gorgeous," I gushed unselfconsciously. "Thank you!"

Duke leaned in to peck my cheek, but stopped himself. Instead he sat next to me. "I bet you thought I forgot today was a special day."

"Special day?" It wasn't our anniversary.

"You know..." He had a twinkle in his eye, but for the life of me, I couldn't imagine what he was talking about. He wasn't thinking of a special day for Andrea, was he?

"C'mon, Andy. It's your twentieth birthday!"

"No kidding?"

Duke cocked an eyebrow. "You honestly didn't remember?"

"Duke, I've never celebrated a birthday in my life. This is the first birthday present I've ever gotten." I started to get choked up. Perhaps it was the effects of the hormones.

"Oh, Andy. I ought to give you nineteen more presents to make up for it."

My tears were flowing now. "Believe me, this is enough." I fought for control and blew my nose. "Duke, about last night."

"Yes?" He was guarded.

"I'm not saying it was right, or wrong, but I'm very confused right now."

"I understand. I'm sorry..."

"Don't apologize," I said severely. "Listen. I know you expected a little more alone time on your honeymoon, and I haven't given you that."

"Totally understandable."

"But not fair to you. I don't suppose there are any beaches or anything near here? You know, maybe take some time...to get to know each other?" I wasn't sure what I was implying. But I did know that it was time for Duke and I to stop playing games.

For the first time since our wedding, Duke smiled an wide, untroubled grin. "There's the Seychelles Islands. Not much of a resort, but they are beautiful. Would you like a little shore leave? Just you and me and Nikki?"

"Nikki can have her own vacation."

***

The Seychelles are a tiny chain of islands in the Indian Ocean. Located far from American and European money, they've never been a big tourist destination. But when we landed, we realized this was a great thing.

The people, who are mostly black and speak an odd mix of European, African, and Indian languages, were friendly and fun loving. They were not obsequious, like natives of a resort area. They treated us like strangers visiting a small town; anxious for us to have a good time and spend money, but not constantly at our backs. Duke and I were unmolested at the hotel, in restaurants, on the beach. Nikki stayed at a separate hotel, blocks away.

It's not easy to shed critical elements of your personality. But as the long, hot, tropical days dragged on, my mental defenses began to crumble. Defense so big and ingrained that I never knew they existed. And as the defenses fell, a new Andy emerged. One who may have been brand new, or possibly who had been there all along.

I let Duke rub sunscreen on my back. I rubbed it on his brawny shoulders in return. I let him hold my hand as we walked down the dusty streets, though there was not a photographer in sight. I let him pin a flower in my hair. We danced at a local bar. We swam together, and I let him dry me off. And, on occasion, his lips would touch mine, and I didn't pull away.
The hotel was awkward. We'd impulsively ordered a room with a single bed, but I soon realized what that implied. Duke, however, was a perfect gentleman. He allowed me to change clothes in the bathroom, and at night, he slept on the sofa.

And then, one night, the dam broke. We'd both been drinking. We had run down the beach, barefoot, laughing in the moonlight. I was wearing a long dress, and it tripped me up. Duke reached down to help me up, but I tipsily yanked him down on top of me. And then we stopped laughing.

Soon his tongue was in my mouth. Three months of a celibate honeymoon had caught up with him. His hands ran down my bare shoulders, pawed at my body.

I struggled away. "I have sand in my dress. I need a shower."

Duke let out a long, frustrated sigh. "Okay."

"Perhaps...perhaps you'd like to join me. Wash my back."

I was standing alone in the shower. The water was hot, and the room was completely steamed up. The water cascaded down on me, on my sunburned shoulders, my bare breasts, my hard nipples. I was wearing a pair of swim trunks. If I were going to play wife, it would do well not to have my penis showing.

I heard Duke enter. I heard the bathroom radio go on, and then saw the lights turn down. Duke pulled aside the shower curtain and joined me. He wore not a stitch, and his throbbing erection...well, you could have hung a bath towel or five from it.

"Andy..." He reached out to grab me by the shoulders, but I stopped him with a bare palm to his burly chest. I placed a bar of soap in his hand.

"Get my back please. Then my front. If you do a good job, I'll wash you."

***

Hours later I lay on our bed, bare chested, sore, and exhausted. And contented. Duke lay snoring next to me, his arm thrown possessively over my stomach.

I couldn't sleep. Had we done the right thing? Time would tell. Was I sorry? Not on your life.

***

We boarded the ship a week later, skipping and laughing and holding hands. As Duke went off to talk to the captain, Nikki cornered me.

"Keep in mind you're supposed to get divorced after all this. You can't let the cameras catching you being a happy couple."

I giggled. "Well, who's to say we have to get divorced?"

I expected Nikki to look happy, but she only frowned. "That wasn't part of your plan."

"Of course not. And I haven't decided to do anything beyond this trip. But, like you said, this life can be enjoyable. It's started to grow on me."

Nikki smiled an uncomfortable smile. "I think I did my job too well."

"Then you should be proud." I put my arm around her. "I'm happy. For the first time in my life, I'm actually happy. I owe it all to you."

"Please don't thank me."

"Of course I have you to thank! If you hadn't helped me, I never would have...shall we say...discovered certain thing about myself."

Nikki wouldn't make eye contact. She must have felt embarrassed.

"I'll tell you another thing," I told her. "Meeting Duke wasn't the only good thing about this trip. I have a sister now."

"Andrea..."

"No honey, you."

Nikki's eyes opened wide. "Don't call me that! I mean, I'm old enough to be your mother."

"Who cares? You've been a more than a friend. You're my family. I'd be proud to call you my sister."

The tearful hugging I had expected didn't materialize. Instead Nikki glowered. "Don't call me that. Don't ever call me that." She ran off.

I didn't know what to make of Nikki's rudeness, but I decided she'd explain on her own time. Instead I unpacked and went to find Duke.

When I reached the door of his office, I heard raised voices. No, not raised voices. Screaming. Duke screaming. The door flew open, and out rushed Nikki. She had the most frightened, despairing look I'd ever seen on her face. With a sad backward glance, she walked away. Duke sneered after her and slammed his door.

I caught up with her in cabin.

"Nikki, what was that all about?"

Nikki was pulling a suitcase out of her closet. "Go away."

"Don't tell me that. Not after all we've been through. Talk to me."

Nikki looked at me and I was shocked by the despair on her face. "I betrayed you and Duke."

An icy chill went through me. "What do you mean, Nikki?" I thought of the pictures taken of me in Greece. Nikki couldn't have arranged that, could she?

"Andy, I'm a false friend. I..." Nikki seemed to be in agony. "I helped your sister, Andrea."

My hands clutched the back of a chair. "With what?" I whispered.

"Everything. Meeting Duke. How to act so he'd fall for her. Finding out about you. Arranging for you to find out about her." Nikki lowered her head. "Providing the drugs that knocked you out before the wedding."

There was nothing for me to say. My best friend, the woman who I'd called sister, was a traitor.

"You're not my sister, Nikki. You're dead to me, and I wish I wasn't speaking metaphorically." I turned to go.

"Can't I explain?"

"What? That you sold out Duke and I? How much did she give you?"

"Nothing. It wasn't for money."

"What then? Publicity? Drugs?" I was trying to be cruel.

"She blackmailed me, Andy."

I snorted. "Right."

"I'm serious. She knows a secret about me. Andy, don't you think it's strange that I know so much about cross dressing?"

"I never really thought about it."

"Andy, fifteen years ago, I was a guy named Nick."

Stunned, I looked Nikki over. The height, the wide hands...well, it took a lot of imagination, but just maybe...Nikki? A guy? An ex-guy?

My mind raced with questions. However, the only thing I could come up with was to ask if her boyfriend, the pilot Trent, knew.

"He knows. He's okay with it."

I was still trying to get my mind around all this. To me, Nikki had been all woman. I couldn't believe that she had started out life like I had: as a guy!

She continued speaking. "After my sex change, I started working for Duke. My life had been hell as a man, and suddenly I had become the girl of my dreams. For over a decade I was in heaven. Then, one day, your sister approached me. Threatens to tell the world unless I help her land Duke."

I stopped pitying Nikki and started pitying myself again. "So what? The world might care that Duke's wife is a guy, but would they really care about his publicist? That's page ten news. Duke would have helped you anyway."

"Duke would have done anything for me. It's not the fact I was once a man that I was hiding. There was something else."

"What?"

"Growing up as a man was miserable. I thought about suicide constantly. And since I didn't have a rich man to pay for everything, I couldn't afford the surgery."

"So?"

"So I stole over $30,000 from the company I worked for and disappeared. Took on a new identity. Andrea threatened to tell them, to go to the law."

"Duke might have helped you."

"Maybe. Maybe not. But Andy, I committed those crimes as Nick. They could send me to a men's prison. Do you have any idea what would happen to me there?"

"So you just decided to ruin two other people's lives?" I tried to sound hateful, but failed.

"My only excuse is I never thought Andrea's plan would work. Every step of the way I thought something would go wrong. But things went so beautifully. It just never occurred to either of us how far Duke would go to cover things up. And then you two started acting like you were enjoying yourselves, so I didn't say anything. And then you called me your sister...the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me...and I went to Duke and told him everything."

Without a word, without looking back, I left the cabin.

***

I found Duke in what was left of his office. His desk was overturned, his expensive computer lay smashed on the floor, and all decorations had been ripped off the wall. When he saw me he punched the bulkhead.

"Don't do that. You'll break your knuckles."

I had never seen such rage on the face of anyone who wasn't on PCP. "I guess you know what that whore did to me. Did to us."

I uprighted Duke's chair and sat him down. Placing my hands on his shoulders, I began to rub. After a few minutes I could feel the tenseness begin to drain. It was if he were deflating like a beach ball.

Duke was staring at a picture that lay beneath a crushed picture frame on his desk. It was a group shot at one of his company' functions. In the middle stood Duke and Nikki, two good friends.

"I can't believe what that bitch did. But she'll pay for it. I'm going to dump her on the most desolate, uninhabited rock this side of Australia. She can rot there. Or blow some merchant marine crew to take her back home. Cocksucking shemale. If she ever makes it back to the US I'll make damn sure she never works again. I'll make sure everyone knows she's a guy."

I brushed off a space on the desk and sat across from him. "Are you finished?"

"Yes."

"Good. Now here's what you're really going to do. You'll drop Nikki off at the next island with an airport. You'll see that she gets a flight back to the US. You can demote her, or put her on a leave of absence, or whatever, but you won't fire her. At least not until you've had a month or so to calm down."

Duke looked at me like I had grown another head. "How can you suggest that? She turned you into a woman!"

"Is that such a bad thing?"

Duke smiled in spite of himself. "Not from where I'm sitting."

"She hurt us both, Duke. I don't forgive her. I don't think I ever will. But she panicked. She thought she might go to prison. Is that what you want for her?"

Duke pouted. I kissed him.

***

Two days later we dropped Nikki off at the British naval base at Diego Garcia. She flew home the next day, to begin a year as assistant to the VP of one of Duke's subsidiaries. This was a much less glamorous job, and paid about half of what she previously made.

Later that week Nikki's old employer received an unexpected letter from an attorney. It stated that the funds stolen by Nick would be repaid with interest from an anonymous source. In return, the company had to drop all charges regarding the theft.

***

Nikki's revelation drove Duke and I closer together. The fact that the one other person we trusted had been dishonest, well, we realized if we were going to get through this mess, we'd have to do it on our own.

Instead of relying on Nikki for a travel itinerary, Duke decided on our travel arrangements by himself. Instead up sailing north to Japan, as we'd originally intended, we headed south.

Instead of depending on Nikki for fashion and woman's advice, I relied on myself. I found that with experience, and the help of Duke's very expensive satellite internet hookup, I could make intelligent decisions regarding my clothes, my makeup, and my hair. The hormones continued to give me more and more curves. Waking up with breasts ceased to startle me, and slipping on a bra was just another part of my day. My penis began to whither and I could no longer get an erection. With the use of a sex-hiding device I could wear modest bikini bottoms. Duke kept teasing me that the surgeon who'd given me breasts could make me over below the waist, too.

Physically, things changed as well. Duke now no longer had to sneak out of our honeymoon cabin at night. I won't deny it; nights were a little frightening for me at first. But Duke was gentle and understanding. As the weeks went by, he'd slowly broaden my horizons. With simple things, like a bottle of chocolate syrup, or an ice cube, or a silk scarf, he'd allow me to experience feelings I'd never known existed.

Duke stopped calling me Andrea, saying it reminded him too much of my sister. He called me 'Andi,' spelled with an 'I.'
Neither of us mentioned what would happen when we returned to the US. For months we'd been planning a divorce. But is that what we wanted? At least, right away? I was too terrified to broach the topic.

Three weeks after we left Nikki, we made an unscheduled stop at Darwin, in northern Australia. Of all our ports of call I think I liked this one the best. The ocean was beautiful, the beaches white, and the weather gorgeous.

Duke said we could spend as much time as we wanted alone, but I was beginning to know him better than anyone. He longed for society, for friends, for company. When I suggested we go out on the town, he was excited.

A local bigwig was throwing a charity ball, and Duke bought two tickets for the equivalent of $1,000 US. I wore a sleeveless, backless dress that showed of my increasingly freckled chest. I put my hair up and wore the beautiful birthday necklace Duke had given me. Some pumps and a new purse completed my image.

As I stared at myself in the mirror, I saw Duke slip in behind me. He kissed my neck, then stood with his hands on my bare shoulders.

"You've changed, Andi. Since our first night out in Miami, you've changed."

I smirked at him, thrusting my boobs in his direction.

"Well, I don't just mean that. You're so much more confident. So much more..."

"More what?"

"Happy. Am I right?"

I dabbed on some perfume. "In Miami, I was a guy in drag. Now, for all intents and purposes, I'm a woman."

Duke looked at me for a long moment. He took my hand. "Let's go."

The dance was okay, so far as those things went. Duke and I danced, we drank, and I chatted with people. Duke was right, I was much more confident. If someone mentioned some aspect of high society that I didn't understand, then I asked about it. If someone had a problem with me, I just ignored them. And when a mining engineer teased me about the infamous Greek picture, I laughed.

When things began to close down, Duke said he had a surprise for me. His surprise turned out to be an all terrain vehicle that he'd borrowed. Within an hour we were driving through the unpopulated desert of the (almost) outback. There were blankets in the back. An hour later, after we dressed again, we watched the sunrise over the desert.

Sitting in the driver's seat, Duke took my hand.

"Andi. I've been thinking."

"Yes?"

"We'll be back home before you know it."

"Yes." I sighed.

"I know I said we should get divorced when we return..."

I was suddenly very alert. My God...what was he suggesting?

"Andi, I've grown very fond of you. Not as a stand-in for your sister, either. Of you, yourself."

"Duke, I've grown very fond of you." My stomach filled with butterflies. He was about to suggest I extend my time as a wife...or make it permanent.

"Andi...this is so hard to say..."

I looked into his earnest eyes. "Just say it, honey."

"Andi...when we get back to the States..."

I touched his cheek. "Yes?"

"I'll give you another million dollars for six more months as my wife."

My world died there. Even Nikki's betrayal didn't hurt that much. After all we'd done...all we'd been through...I was still just another business proposition. Instead of asking for my heart, he was trying to buy my body.

"Duke, take me home."

"Andi..."

"Don't talk."

***

I was so hurt by Duke that I didn't leave my cabin for several days. I wished I could talk to Nikki. Didn't he understand that we were beyond money now? Didn't he know that if I decided to stay with him, to give up on Andrew forever, that it would be because of my feelings?

After three days I had to get some fresh air. At midnight I slipped off all my clothes and put on a bathrobe. I didn't even need any padding underneath. Duke had robbed me of everything but my penis. He'd turned me into a woman. A woman he thought he could buy.

I paced the deck, stopping to lean against the rail where he'd first kissed me. How could I have actually thought he cared about me? How could I have thought he loved me?

"Andi?"

I ignored him. There was nothing he could say that I wanted to hear.

"Andi?" He stood next to me. Out of the corner of my eye I saw the miserable look on his face. He was so dejected I almost took his hand before catching myself.

"Andi, do you ever wish you could turn back time?"

"Yes," I spat. "Like about a year."

There was a silence. "Do you really mean that?"

"Give me a hundred bucks and I'll take it back," I said snidely.

Duke grabbed both my hands and pulled me towards him. "Andi, I'm sorry!"

"For what? Treating me like a whore? I shouldn't blame you, this whole arrangement was about money from the beginning."

Duke released me. "It stopped being about money a long time ago."

I allowed myself to look at my husband. "Then why did you try to buy me?"

"Because I'm a dick."

I couldn't agree with that. "No you're not. Which is not to say you can't BE a dick at times."

"Ever since I became rich, dating became a financial thing. Every woman who's ever gone out with me did it because of my money, at least in part."

"Not every woman."

Duke looked even more ashamed. "Ever since I found what your sister did, I guess I thought it was too much to have a woman really, truly love me."

"But you did have it, Duke. No amount of money could have made me change my body like this. I did it...I guess I did it all to make you happy."

"Andi..." Duke tried to hold me.

"Forget it. I'm not for sale." I walked away.

"Andi!" Duke screamed.

"What?"

"I love you! I love you so much. I love you more than any woman I've known. I love who you've become. I don't want to live without you."

If I walked away then, it truly would have been the end. I could have gotten a divorce, changed back into a man, and gotten on with my life. Instead, I turned.

"I love you too, Duke. God help me, I love you."

"Can you forgive me?"

It's a cruel woman who reminds her man of his mistakes. "Forgive you for what?"

"Andi, I have another proposal for you."

"Yes?"

"Will you act like my wife when we get back for no money at all?"

I smiled. "Duke, I'm not exactly acting anymore."

"Then do we really have to get a divorce? Can't we just see where all this leads?"

"Do you really want to be married to a man?" I asked, embarrassed.

"No. I want to be married to you, Andi!"

"Then of course I accept." Duke leaned in to kiss me. "On a few conditions."

Duke seemed a little surprised. "Like what?"

"I want to go back to school. I want to study social work and get a job helping the poor."

Duke looked perplexed. "But you won't have to work."

"Yes I will. We can't do this unless we're equals. I can't play the bored housewife."

Duke chuckled. "You couldn't, could you?"

"Nope."

"Anything else?"

"This can't be about money. Keep the million dollars."

"Are you sure, you certainly earned..."

I covered his mouth. "Don't say it. Don't you dare think of what I did as work."

He then covered my mouth with his. And as I took him into my bed...into OUR bed that night, I realized I finally was where I belonged. I fell asleep that night thinking of our future. Education. A home. A husband. A family.

A week later Andrea reentered our lives and shattered our happiness.

***

Duke's yacht, of course, was set up with every conceivable luxury. The thing that had impressed me the most was the computer setup. Before all this started I'd never so much as played a video game. The first mate, however, was a bit of a computer expert, and was happy to give me lessons. Satellite internet access is by no means cheap, but Duke could afford it. I had even signed up for some online classes, and as we steamed towards Hawaii, I finally earned my GED.

It was about this time Duke paid off the right people and managed to get me a passport in the name of Andi Greyson, female. It seemed that my future as a woman was all mapped out. The day before we hit Honolulu, as I scanned the website a Georgia University, I felt nothing could stop us.

"Ma'am?" It was the first mate, sticking his head into the computer room.

"Yes?"

"You have a phone call from the United States. You can pick up in here."

That was odd. Who could be calling me? I hoped it wasn't someone who knew the original Andrea. With trepidation, I picked up the phone.

"Andi?" came an upset voice.

"Nikki?" Why should she be calling? I certainly didn't feel very warmly towards the woman who'd helped Shanghai me.

"Andi, don't hang up. I have to talk to you."

"Whatever it is, it can wait until I get back." I decided to play coy. "I'm on my honeymoon, after all."

"Andi, don't joke." Something in her voice told me I needed to listen.

"What is it?"

"It's your sister. I've had Trent keep tabs on her. Apparently, as long as you're playing her part, she can't get her hands on any of Duke's money."

"Good. She certainly doesn't deserve it."

"Listen to me. You sister's in Hawaii. She's going to meet with Duke. Unless he takes her back and dumps you off somewhere, she'll go to the press. She's going to spill everything, Andi."

Within a minute I was in Duke's office, telling him everything.

"Duke, what are we going to do?"

Duke had listened to my whole story without changing his expression. When I was finished, he picked up a pencil from his desk and snapped it.

"Guess I'll go talk to her, Andi."

"But..."

"I'm afraid I'm going to have to ask you to stay on board while we're in Hawaii. We can't risk anyone seeing you in two places. I'll make it up to you."

"But Duke..."

"Now if you'll excuse me, I'll have to take care of some business before we hit land." Almost brusquely, Duke ushered me out of his office.

We landed in the 50th state sometime before dawn. I had intended to talk to Duke before he left, to find out what he intended to do. I was crushed when I found out that Duke had gone ashore before I'd even woken up.

I spent a miserable day alone in my cabin. What was he going to do? One word to the press and we were sunk. Everyone would know I was a man. Everyone would know the Greek pictures were real. We'd be a tabloid sensation. Duke would be ruined, humiliated for the rest of his life.

As the day wore on, my nervousness became agony. Where was he? What we doing? I thought back to how he had almost married my sister. Despite his denials, he had to have had some feelings for her. What if he still did. What if...what if he remembered those feelings? What if he decided he'd rather have a real woman than her shemale replacement? Oh God.

I was in a full-blown panic. Why would he even want me? I was nobody. I wasn't even really a woman. Andrea was supposed to be his wife. What use was I?

Duke didn't come home that night or the next. At the beginning of the third I packed my things. I'd reach some sort of settlement with Duke. He'd set me up somewhere, let me go to school, while he got on with his life. His married life. With his wife, Andrea. And all I could do was to be the woman who truly loved him.

Duke came aboard that afternoon and slipped a lei around my neck. "Why the long face, Andi?"

"Duke, don't make this any harder. Go to her." I felt like I was driving a knife into my own breast. "I won't stop you."

Duke seemed genuinely confused. "Go to who?"

"Andrea."

Duke laughed. "You goof!" He grabbed me and hugged me. "I just spent two days getting rid of her. Why would I go back to her?"

"Because she's really your wife."

"Nope. You're the one who said 'I do.' I'm holding you to that." Duke tried to pull back but I held him.

"Duke, she's really a woman. Don't you want that?"

He touched my cheek. "You're really a woman. Don't you ever think otherwise."

I pressed my face into my husband's chest and had a good cry. "You really choose me?"

"There was no choice about it."

Finally I pulled away. "So what did you say to her?"

Duke sat down. "Well, she was her old self. Thought we could just go back to the way things were."

"What did you do?"

"I told her that she was to stay away from us forever."

I was confused. "Why would she agree to that?"

"Because I know a thing or two about her. Like her involvement in a rather spectacular armed car robbery last year. Or her days as a drug mule across the Mexican border. She's beaten. She'll keep her mouth shut."

I laughed. "But she won't disappear. We have the same name, sort of."

"How many Andrea Joneses do you think there are? Coincidence."

"But we look the same."

"Have you taken a look in the mirror lately?"

I looked. Even sitting there in my pajamas without makeup, there was no denying the woman I'd become. I was every inch a female.

"What am I supposed to be seeing?"

"My wife, that's what you see. Andrea was pretty, but she's not like you. You're regal. That has nothing to do with hormones or surgery, or makeup. You're nothing like her anymore."

I kissed him. "Thank you."

"Andi, are you happy?"

"Yes."

"Then so am I." He kissed my cheek, then my shoulder. He began to slide his hand under my pajama top.

"Hang on, Duke. How long have we been gone?"

"Over eight months."

"It seems like eight years. Or eight days."

Duke rubbed my neck. "I know what you mean."

"Duke, can we just go home?"

Duke seemed pleased. "You really want to?"

"We're not trying to fool anyone anymore. I want to get out with my life. I want us to get on with our lives."

"Then let's. We'll sail on to Los Angeles, then fly back. The ship can make it without us."

***

And so our adventure drew to a close. Nearly nine months after I found myself forced to play the bride, we sailed into San Francisco Bay. Duke held me as we floated under the Golden Gate Bridge at sunset.

"So is everything set?" I asked my husband.

"Yes. We'll spend the night here, then sail for Los Angeles tomorrow and fly home. The captain will take the boat through the Panama Canal and be back in Georgia in a couple of weeks."

"Good. I'm excited about seeing our house for the first time."

"I think you'll like it, Andi. You know, this is your last chance to back out. You move in with me, I'm never letting you go."

I bit him on the ear. "Well, I'm not backing out. But there is one last thing I'd like to do..."

That night, at a quiet Unitarian chapel, Duke and Andi got married for real. It wasn't a real ceremony as we hadn't applied for a marriage license, but I had to let Duke know I truly wanted to be his wife.

***

There's very little left to tell. Nikki met us in Los Angeles, sobbing and laughing at the same time. I couldn't stay mad at her, especially when I noticed the engagement ring on her finger. When she asked me to be her maid of honor, I accepted. It's what you do for a sister.

Nikki eventually drug Duke away to take care of the business he'd been neglecting on his trip, so I hung out at a seaside bar and waited. I was quite annoyed when a balding middle aged man sat at my table, uninvited.

"May I help you?"

The guy grinned, an insincere gap toothed smile. "You've helped me enough, thank you?"

I wanted to get up and leave, but something about this guy made me uneasy.

"Do I know you?"

"I'm Cravin C. Woodward."

The name meant nothing to me, and I told him so.

"I'm a photographer. I think you remember a certain picture I took of you."

It clicked into place. This was the son of a bitch who had taken the picture of me in Greece. The man who'd forced me to get breast implants. The man who'd nearly ruined everything.

No good could come from talking to him. As I stood up, he laid something on the table. A thick manila folder.

Cravin ordered a beer as I read the contents with panic. There was a copy of my medical records from Israel, when I got the breast implants. There were some other grainy pictures of me topless in Greece. Another shot of me in Miami, where my padding had slipped into view for a second. And finally, a copy of my birth certificate, listing me as 'male.'

"Your sister sends her regards," said the photographer, with an evil grin.

"Name your price. Anything. Duke will pay it."

"There's no price. Your breast implants got me fired. They think I faked that photo. Thanks to these documents, I can prove to the world that you're a man."

"A million dollars!"

"I wouldn't take ten million."

"Then what do you want?" I think if he'd asked for a pound of flesh I would have given it to him.

"I want another drink."

I motioned for a waiter to fill him up.

"Okay, Cravin. What do you want?"

He swigged his beer. "Another drink I told you." To my shock, he got up to leave, without taking his evidence.

"But...I don't understand."

He sat back down grinning, a little more sincere. "For twenty years, I've been a vulture. I've preyed off human misery. I ruined reputations, caused scandals, and wrecked lives. For the past few months, as I planned my revenge, I've had to work at the city desk at an Illinois paper you've never heard of. And you know what? For the first time in two decades, I can look myself in the mirror in the morning.

"I can destroy you, Mrs. Greyson, but for once in my life, that wouldn't make me happy. I'm going to stop this shit."

I blinked. "I don't know what to say."

"Well, I'm still a reporter. I'm dying to know the truth. Strictly off the record, what's your story?"

"How do I know you won't print it?"

"If I was going to out you, I would have done it a month ago. And I wouldn't have asked for your side. Trust me Mrs. Greyson, this is just about my own curiosity. And if it's none of my business, I can respect that."

I ordered a rum and Coke for myself. "Okay, Cravin. It all started about nine months ago..."

The End