The Wringer Part Five:  One Piece at a Time
by Brian
[email protected]
Copyright 1999

It was around two in the morning and most of the guests at the cast party had gone home.  I put my arm around my sleepy wife and grinned as I regarded the mess that our friends had left in our living room and kitchen.  Another successful play, another collective sigh of relief, another riotous celebration.  This time, it was our turn to host.  No doubt my wife J.J. and myself would be spending most of tomorrow on cleanup.

I looked over at J.J., who had had one of the leading rolls in this play, and thought how much I loved her.  We'd been together for over four years and the passion was still alive.  She was a lover and a companion.  I also happened to think she was the loveliest woman I had ever laid eyes on.  Maybe that sounds a little corny, but it's true.  Her red hair, her freckles, her slim, lithe figure...I really did (and still do) consider her the epitome of feminine beauty.

I glanced over at our two remaining guests, Maria and Melody.  They were attractive women in the own right, what with Maria's dusky, Hispanic beauty and Melody's blonde, voluptuous good looks.  Under normal circumstances I'd probably be quite attracted to the pair, but no one could replace J.J. in my eyes.  Not that my opinions mattered one wit in this situation.  Maria and Melody were both in love...with each other.

"I suppose we'd better be getting home as well," said Maria, lovingly squeezing Melody's arm.

"Nonsense," I drunkenly slurred, as I poured myself another shot of tequila.  I'm not a drinking man by nature, but when I do, I go all out.

"Don," grumbled J.J. as she stood and stretched, "I don't see how you can drink that swill."

"It ain't swill, honey.  Look, it says here it's imported all the way from Mexico."

"All tequila is imported from Mexico," yawned Melody.  "It's no big deal."

"Hey," interrupted Maria, "I was imported from Mexico, so watch what you say.  But seriously, we do need to get on back."

J.J. and I said good night as they gathered their belongings.  As they prepared to leave, Maria acted like she had something to say.  Finally she asked us if she and Melody could borrow The Wringer.  J.J. and I laughed awkwardly, as adults often do when confronted with the sex lives of their friends.  I guess I should elaborate.

The Wringer is a simple magic trick.  It looks a bit like a copy machine on wheels with rollers in the front and a crank on the side.  The operation in simple.  Someone climbs into The Wringer.  Someone else turns the crank.  The person inside emerges through the rollers, physically unharmed, but flat as a bedsheet.  Whispered speech is still possible, movement is not.  The flattened person stays like this until they are fed through the rollers in the opposite direction.

I don't know if many people would find this erotic, but I know my wife and I do.  Seeing J.J. lying there, flat as a piece of notebook paper, immobile, soft, and bendable...in her normal state she excites me to no end.  In her flattened condition...

Maria and Melody also must have enjoyed the machine in a similar manner, though of course I was never given the details.  I got the impression that J.J. knew more than she let on, but was strangely reluctant to talk about it.  All I knew for sure was that Maria was the one who was flattened, not Melody.

I quickly retrieved the odd contraption and began thinking how to load it into the girls' car when Melody asked me the fateful question.  "Don, you once told me that when  person is in a flattened state, then they can be cut up and restored.  Remember?"

"Sure, I remember.  Did you ever experiment with that?"  Maria and Melody both glanced away, apparently they had (see part 3 of this series).  

"I was just wondering," continued Melody "how did you find that out?"

"Jesus, that night!"  I winced, remembering the fright that that discovery had shaken out of us.  "Well, J.J. was all flattened out, right?  Butterfingers me, I end up catching her hand in a sliding door and cut off two of her fingers.  We were in a panic.  I packed them in ice, not knowing if I should restore her, not restore her, what?  I called the helpline and asked them.  They said there was no reason to panic, just to send all of her parts through and she'd come out fine."

Melody shook her head.  "I'll never understand this thing."  Absentmindedly, she opened the box and touched the rollers from inside.

I didn't see it coming.  With one hand Maria turned on The Wringer, with the other she spun the crank.  Melody had time to let out a yelp before she was sucked in.  Maria stopped cranking when only when nothing but Melody's legs were sticking out of the top of the box.

I walked around to the front.  I saw what I had expected to see: a flat, unanimated image of the back of Melody's head, arms, and shoulders hanging from the rollers.  Maria gently took Melody's head in her hand and pulled her upright until her face became visible.  Her eyes were wide as saucers, her mouth open in a scream.

The funny thing was, Maria hadn't cranked her all the way through.  Her legs were still perfectly normal, frantically kicking from the other end of The Wringer.  If I hadn't known the truth, I would have thought it was a damn original illusion.

"Gotcha," smirked Maria with an evil grin.  Very slowly she cranked Melody the rest of the way through.  "Are you OK?" she asked the gaping photo.  An inarticulate groan from the image's direction was her only answer.

Maria smiled at us now.  "You know, maybe we won't borrow The Wringer, at least not for a couple of nights.  It's high time Melody spent some time like this."

I was stunned, but not a lot.  Melody would be okay; despite Maria's tough facade, she cared very deeply for Melody.

J.J. shook her head resignedly.  "Well, can we interest you in a nightcap before you go?"

"Sure," said Maria, gently spreading Melody out on the sofa.  "Though I think Melody will pass."

"Maria," Melody's voice whispered, "I'm going to kill you."  Maria chuckled and kissed Melody on the forehead.  "You look sweet this way."

Maria was right, in a way.  Lying on the couch like that, all flat and smooth, looking helpless and scared...there was something cute about her state.  Melody didn't seem to think so, however.

 "Well, if you were trying to get me to lose weight, your plan worked," she breathed.

This made Maria angry.  "How many times do I have to tell you, you don't need to loose weight!  You look fine the way you are."

I regarded the woman-shaped bedsheet on the sofa.  When she was in her normal state, you might have called her slightly plump, but she was by no means someone who had to be constantly worried about being fat.  That's our society for you; a woman is twenty pounds above her optimum weight and she'll never stop thinking of herself as disgustingly obese.

"Maria," said Melody, sadly, "just take me home.  We've had this conversation before, you know I could stand to loose weight."

J.J. broke in at this time.  "Melody, at least you have curves.  At least you have tits!  I'd give anything to have a nice legs and hips like you do, instead of this scrawny, beanpole frame of mine.  God, what I'd give to have your chest!"

I tried to object, "J.J. honey, you look gorgeous the way you are..."  No one was listening.  

Of course Maria had to join in the conversation and cut herself down as well.  "At least you are skinny, Jennifer (my wife's full name).  I wish I had your figure; look at me, I'm built like a man."  That was an absurd statement.  While Maria was well toned and athletic, her muscular frame accentuated her femininity rather than detracting from it.  I tried to tell her as much, but to no avail.  The women were too busy complaining about their bodies.  I'm too fat!  I'm too skinny!  My breasts are too big!  I'm too short!  I'm too flat-chested!  I'm too flat! (from Melody, of course)  I have too many freckles!

I tried to interject.  "Listen, you three.  You're talking crap!  What is with women? No matter how pretty they are, they always think their friends are better looking.  Do you think I sit around with Zeke and tell him how much I wish I had his legs?  Do you think Frank tells me he'd do anything to have my hair?  You are three very lovely ladies, stop insulting yourselves!"

The women all shot me that 'You're a man and just wouldn't understand,' look.  "Don," began J.J. "I love you, but you can be quite dense at times.  Society looks at women differently.  Men learn to accept their bodies, women are taught to hate theirs."

Disgusted, I stormed off into the kitchen.  Women are never satisfied.  I would bet anything that any of them could have had nine out of ten guys on the street, and yet all they could see was how they compared to each other.  I firmly believed that there wasn't a woman on earth who wouldn't switch their body with someone else's, given a chance.

I sat at the table trying to make sense of it all.  Realizing that greater minds than mine had grappled with the feminine psyche, I gave it up as fruitless and flipped on the radio.

One of my favorite songs was playing; 'One Piece at a Time,' by Johnny Cash.  It's about a GM assembly line worker who manages to steal an entire Cadillac by sneaking out parts in his lunch box, one piece at a time.  Unfortunately, it takes him over twenty years to accomplish this, and when he finally puts it all together he ends up with a damn odd looking car, due to changes in auto-design over the years.

The song still made me chuckle, as I pictured the car the singer described: one tail fin, two headlights on one side and one on the other, transmission and engine designed ten years apart.  I shook my head.  Some parts look good in one place, but in another...

That's when I had my epiphany.  Of course!  I laughed out loud.  The girls envied each other's parts?  Well, maybe I could make them stop envying.

I thought long and hard about the bodies of the three women in the living room.  J.J.:  Long red hair, medium height, freckled complexion, skinny, small breasts.  Maria: Short black hair, tall, dark complexion, muscular, medium breasts.  Melody: Medium length blonde hair, light complexion, plump, large breasts.  It was hard to think of three women who had less in common, physically.  My plan would work.  

Now that I think back on it, had I been sober there was no way I would have attempted this.  It wasn't the smartest idea, but in my defense I was doing it all for my wife.  It pained me to see her compare her body to someone else's, I was just trying to show her how perfect I thought she was.  But, what's done is done, and as Supergrover says, "On with our story!"

I burst back into the living room like a madman.  Maria had folded up Melody and was just about to slip her into her purse.  "Stop!" I bellowed.  "Don't go yet, I just came up with a great idea for a magic trick!"

"Honey," said J.J., kissing my cheek, "settle down.  You're drunk."

I remembered that Churchill had once been publicly accused of being drunk and had come back with a witty rejoinder.  I groped for his exact words.  "I may be drunk," I babbled, "but...uh, but...tomorrow I'll be sober!"  Damn, that wasn't quite right.

"What sort of magic trick?" came a voice from inside Maria's bag.

"Just watch," I laughed, as I prepared The Wringer.  Maria unfolded Melody and situated her on a chair.

"Don," began my wife, "I don't think this is safe right now..."

I pretended to be hurt.  "Honey, do you honestly think I'd do anything that could harm you?"  Heehee...she couldn't very well say yes to that.  I motioned for her to step into the box.  She shook her head at me and complied.

I turned the crank.  Even then, even with me two sheets to the wind, with Maria and Melody watching and J.J. fully clothed, I was still aroused at the sight of J.J. slowly passing through the rollers, her feet, legs, and hips...so very flat.  When, all too soon, she was pancaked, I held her up in front of my face and kissed her.  She couldn't kiss back of course.  I spread her out on the sofa.  

"Maria, now you!" I said, almost insane in my enthusiasm.

"Now just one minute, Don."

"C'mon, trust me, this'll be fun."

Maria stood up and faced me, making me uncomfortably aware of the fact that I was the shorter one, and not by a little.  "Don," she said, playfully straightening my disheveled tie, "we've been friends for a long time, and I do trust you.  But if I go through that Wringer now, all three of us will be at your mercy.  And if you do anything, and I mean ANYTHING, to take advantage of me like that, I swear to God you'll regret it."  With that she tightened my tie about five sizes too small, "and that goes doubly if you do anything to Melody.  Understand?"

"Gaaaaaaahk!" I choked, and nodded in agreement.  She loosened my tie, allowing me to breathe again.  Wordlessly, she climbed into The Wringer.  I was too scared by her to even think about getting turned on by the sight of her slowly being reduced to two dimensions.

I laid the three women side by side on the floor.  "Just remember what I told you," came Maria's almost inaudible voice.  

"Don't worry, this is all above the board.  Now..."  I rooted through the end table until I found a pair of scissors.  "let's begin."

I placed the scissors at J.J. hips.  "Just what do you think you're doing?" she hollered in as loud a voice as her state would allow.

"Honey," jeez, how to put this? "you know you'll come to no harm.  And I promise you you'll be in one piece again in under ten minutes."

"Don, this is too weird.  I'm not consenting to anything until you tell me what you have planned."

"It'll ruin the effect.  Just let me begin, if you don't like it I promise I'll put you right back together."

"Okay, go ahead, but only because I trust you."

I snipped.  It was like cutting a bedsheet.  Her hips separated from her stomach easily.  I relished the feel of her soft, pliable skin as I divided her.  When I had finished, I cut her stomach away below her chest, her chest away below the shoulders, and her shoulders away at the neck.  When I had finished, she was in five flat pieces: head, shoulders and arms, chest, stomach, and hips and legs.  I of course had not disrobed her, except for her head and hands she merely looked like scraps of cloth on the floor.

"How are you doing?" I asked my wife.  As excited as I was by all this, I didn't want her to be upset.

"I feel odd, but I do every time I go through The Wringer.  The clock's ticking, Don, whatever you have in mind, get to it."

"Just one second," I said, absently opening and closing the scissors.  "Maria and Melody, can I have your permission to proceed with you two?"

"Normally, I'd say no," came Maria's seemingly disembodied voice "but I'd really love to see Melody in pieces.  Lord knows she's seen me that way enough."  One of these days I'd have to ask about that story.  "I'll do it if she will."

"Excellent.  Melody, will you consent?"  

"I suppose," came the frightened reply.  I don't think Melody had the courage to stand up to the group.

I quickly dissected the couple, much more rapidly and disconnectedly than I had my own wife.  Soon all three women lay in flattened pieces on the floor.

"Now are you all comfortable?"  I asked.

"Get on with it!" shouted J.J. and Maria in unison.  "Yeah!" came Melody's feeble agreement, a couple of seconds later.

"All right.  Now, as you know, I don't care for the way you all are constantly putting yourselves down..."

"Don, it's late," said J.J. "Spare us your speeches."

"Fine.  OK, here's the deal.  When I accidentally cut off J.J.'s fingers, I called the magic help line.  The operator told me Wringer victims can be cut and restored easily.  But she also told me that if the pieces of different Wringer victims were fed back through the rollers, then they would be restored with whatever body parts they went through with.  Magic Co. is currently trying to make this into a stage illusion, along the lines of the 'Double Sawing.'  In short, ladies, I'm giving you the opportunity to mix and match.  Pick and choose.  You've always envied each other's bodies, well now you can have at least some of the parts you admire."

There was a long, long, pause.  I began to wonder if I had overstepped myself; I was beginning to sober up.  

"And you'd restore us later?" I heard Melody ask, almost in awe.

"Of course.  Are you game?"  

Melody shouted out an enthusiastic 'yes,' Maria and J.J. agreed, somewhat cautiously.  

"OK, ladies.  You're stuck with your own heads.  Now, who wants who's arms and shoulders?  J.J., you choose first."

"Hmmm," I heard her say.  "I guess I'd have to go with Maria's."

"Fair enough."  I placed Maria's dark, muscled arms where J.J. slim, freckled ones had been.  "Maria, do you want Melody's or J.J.'s?"

"I guess I'll go with Melody's."  I placed Melody's plump, pale arms under Maria's head.  Then I gave J.J.'s arms to Melody by default.
 
"OK, now for chest.  Maria first this time."  Maria chose J.J.'s chest, and I can't say I blamed her.  Melody chose Maria's, J.J. wound up with Melody's, a situation that seemed to please her, as it meant she would go up about threw cup sizes.

"Now for the stomach.  Melody?"  Melody chose J.J.'s stomach, the flattest one in the bunch (well, before The Wringer made all their stomachs equally flat).  J.J. chose Maria's muscular one, Maria had Melody's.

"Finally, hips and legs.  J.J. first again."  J.J. chose Melody's, Maria chose to keep her own.  She did this nervously, afraid J.J. would be mad at the rejection of her legs. This left Melody with J.J.'s legs.  

"Is everyone ready?" I asked.  There were various grunts of agreement.  Carefully, I picked up my wife's head, Maria's arms and stomach, and Melody's chest and legs.  One by one I cranked them backwards through the rollers.  With a deep breath, I lifted the lid.

At first, I noticed little difference in my wife, other than that she was now slightly shorter.  She was still clothed, only now in a conglomeration of Maria and Melody's garments: Melody's jeans, most of Maria's sweater, with a strip of Melody's T-shirt around her chest.  The sweater/T-shirt was all one piece; the women's clothes had molded together along with their bodies.

J.J. held out her hands in amazement.  They were now brown, with Maria's well manicured nails.  She rolled up the sleeves and felt Maria's well developed biceps with awe.

J.J. took a few running steps to the bathroom, I guess she wanted to observe her new body in private.  Then she thought the better of it; it's not like Maria and Melody hadn't seen what was now her torso before.  Perhaps Maria or Melody didn't appreciate me getting a glimpse of their ex-body parts, but J.J. didn't seem to realize that there might be a reason she shouldn't disrobe in front of her husband.  She removed her shirt.

The woman who stood in front of me had my wife's head, but nothing else.  Just under J.J.'s freckled neck, her complexion changed.  There was an obvious line to where her skin went from freckles to a light chocolate color.  J.J. flexed Maria's powerful shoulders and arm muscles.
Under her shoulders, the complexion went from dark to pale.  Melody's large breasts stuck out prominently from what was now J.J.'s body.  J.J. gasped when she saw that, for the first time in her life, she had distinct cleavage.

Under her ribs her skin darkened again, going from plump to muscular.  Maria's stomach was what my college room mate called 'a six pack': so well developed that the six abdominal muscles were clearly defined.  J.J. did not remove her pants, but I could see over the belt line that her skin went pale again.  Through the tight jeans I saw that J.J. now had a curvaceous rear and shapelier legs than she had had before.

I stood back and squinted.  Pale head, dark shoulders, pale chest, dark stomach, pale legs.  She had a striped, almost zebra-like appearance.

"So what do you think?"  I asked.

"This...this is going to take some getting used to.  Give me some time."

"Take all the time you need," I heard Maria's slightly irritated voice.  "But while you're taking it all in, would you mind...?"

I apologized and fed Maria's head and legs, as well at Melody's arms and stomach and J.J.'s chest, through The Wringer and opened it.

Maria stepped out and struck a pose.  She was still Maria above the neck and below the hips; her middle was completely different.  She had on most of Melody's T-shirt, with a strip of J.J.'s dress over her new chest.  Below she still wore her skirt.

Maria was not self conscious at all, she tossed aside the shirt-dress amalgamation to get a good look and what she was now made of.  Her dark, muscular stomach had been replaced by Melody's chubby midriff.  Her well rounded breasts were now J.J.'s flat, almost non-existent ones.  Her arms were now plump, with Melody's turpentine damaged nails.

"Interesting," said Maria, non-committally.  She pulled on her top, and leaned against our table to see what would happen with Melody.

I put Melody's head through The Wringer, along with Maria's chest and most of J.J.'s body.  Melody came out looking taller.  Since she was almost totally J.J. now.  She was mostly clothed in J.J.'s dress; only a swatch of Maria's sweater covered her chest.  Melody showed no signs of wanting to examine her new features, still, I could still see J.J.'s bare, freckled arms and make out her slender figure under the dress.

Maria shook her head in amusement at the sight of her girlfriend.  Then, without warning, she grabbed Meldoy by the arm and practically drug her into our spare bedroom.  I heard the door slam and lock, then the radio began to blast, drowning out whatever other sounds might be coming from in there.

I watched the girls go, taking most of my wife's body with them.  It made me a little angry; I didn't like the thought of anyone else touching J.J.'s parts, even if they weren't technically J.J.'s parts anymore.  My wife walked into our bedroom, I wordlessly followed.

J.J. stood in front of our full-length mirror and examined her body from every angle.  Finally, she removed her bra (a white one, which now had black straps) and fondled Melody's large, pink nipples.  I suddenly felt very guilty and turned away.  It was as if I was watching Melody undress instead of J.J.

"A penny for your thoughts," I heard my wife say, as she wrapped Maria's arms around my waist from behind.

"It's just that I never realized how much your body turned me on until I saw you without it."

J.J. kissed my neck.  "That was the correct answer.  But if you liked my body best, then why did you offer to get me another one?"

I turned to face her, realizing with a start she was now totally naked.  "Because you're always griping about your body.  Well now you have someone else's.  Curves, big tits, washboard stomach...is this what you really want?"

J.J. snorted.  "C'mon Don, I look like the bride of Frankenstein.  But point made, I'll stop bitching about my body.  But only if you accept the fact that I'll never see myself the way you see me and there's nothing wrong with wanting a better body."

"Okay."  We kissed.  J.J. began unbuttoning my shirt.

"Er, hang on a bit J.J."

"What Don?  Too much to drink?"

"Huh?  Oh, no.  It's just, well, can't wait until you have your own body back?"

"C'mon, I may not be all me, but there are nice parts," she said, squeezing Melody's D-cups together.  Mentally, I agreed, but I was afraid making love to two other women's bodies would be bad news.

"I'm sorry J.J., I can't get excited about you in this body."

J.J. grabbed me with Maria's strong arms and held me tight.  She was a great deal stronger now.  "Don, don't blow smoke up Melody's ass.  These are damn fine parts and we know it.  I don't care whose body you screw, just as long as it's my head on top."

I couldn't think of any more false protests.  J.J. was right, they were pretty fine body parts.  None of them compared to J.J.'s, though.

Afterwards, I dozed off in Maria's arms, my hand on Melody's rear, with J.J.'s head nestled under mine.

*
When I awoke, my hangover had blurred most of what had happened the previous night.  I groaned, opened my eyes, and let out a scream.  The first thing I had seen was a strange pair of naked breasts next to me.  In my groggy state I imagined that I had somehow wound up in bed with another woman.  Then I saw J.J's startled face above her patchwork body and remembered what had happened.

"Good morning to you, too," she laughed.

"Honey, please change back.  This is getting too weird."

"Tell me about it.  Last night I saw my toes sticking out from under the covers and I thought Melody was in bed with us for a second."

J.J. got up and pulled on a robe.  "I think the other two are up, I'm sure they're ready to call it quits too."  I kissed her and watched as she left the room.  I guiltily treasured the time I had had with her new body parts.  Not that I didn't prefer my wife's real body, but, well, I'm only human.

I heard the girls mulling around in the living room, so I pulled on some boxers and went to join them.  There I got my second major shock of the day: Maria had partially disassembled The Wringer and had hooked my laptop up to it.

"WHAT IT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING?" I screamed.  Last night had been nice, but I sure as hell didn't want J.J. to stay like that forever.

"Don," said Maria without looking up from the computer screen, "you have a nasty habit of yelling around hungover people."

I repeated my question, in a normal tone of voice.

"Relax," said Maria, "I know what I'm doing.  I just wanted to see how this thing works."

"So did you find out anything interesting?" asked my wife.

"A bit.  You see, this thing is computerized.  Every time someone gets sucked through, it saves their 3-D image in its memory.  But get this.  With a little fooling around, I arranged it so the inputted image doesn't necessarily have to be the one that's outputted."

"Maria," I moaned, "please speak English."

"¿Por qué todos de Uds. Gringos queiren todo el mundo que hablar Inglis?"

"Smartass."

"What I'm trying to tell you is that we don't have to trade body parts now.  Each of us could have Melody's legs, for instance, or her entire body, even the head."

J.J. and Melody gasped, I felt like I had been punched in the gut.  Quickly I excused myself to the kitchen and put on some coffee.

What had I done?  This was a catastrophe!  I never seriously believed any of the women would consent to a permanent body part swap...but this was different.  What if J.J. decided she wanted to be Maria or Melody's twin sister?  It could happen...had I pissed away my wife's wonderful body to prove a point?  

I drank two cups and morosely returned to the living room.  The third major shock of the day hit me, but by this time I was screamed out.

Three identical Marias awaited me.  Each wore a huge smile and was dressed in one of J.J.'s garments.

"What do you think?" asked Maria number one.

"You all look lovely," I said, and it was true.  But the loveliest woman of all was gone.

"So," said the second Maria, "which one of us is your real wife?"

"Easy," I replied, "the one on the left."

The Maria I had chosen shrieked and gave me a kiss.  "How the hell did you ever figure that out?" she asked.

"Hey, we've been married for four years.  You can't fool me."

Actually, I had used an old mind readers' trick.  First of all, the Maria in the middle was totally casual, while the ones on the end kept glancing at their bodies like they were something new.  Obviously, they were really J.J. and Melody.  I simply said 'the one on the left,' knowing that it could be taken to mean my left or their left.  

My Maria (really J.J.) gave me a hug.  Then, without warning, she twisted my arm behind my back.

"Hey," she said, in Maria's voice "I'm stronger than him now!"

"Maria, I mean J.J., let go, that's not funny."

J.J. locked me into a half nelson and forced me to the bedroom.  Then she released me and tossed off the robe she had been wearing.

Looking at J.J.'s head with body parts of other people was one thing, but here stood Maria's body, naked and gorgeous...despite my horniness, I felt like I was about to bang my wife's friend.

"J.J." I began, "maybe we shouldn't..."

J.J. trapped me in a bear hug.  "Don't make me hurt you," she warned.

*
Many hours later, I lay next to my converted wife, totally spent.  It had never been like that before!  Normally she was totally submissive, but tonight she was the one in charge.  Not at all unpleasant, but it was quite a personality change.  I wondered if some of Maria's psyche had somehow transferred itself to my wife.  I asked her about it.

"Oh," she said dreamily, "I'm not your wife, I'm the real Maria."

"WHAT?!"

"God, you're gullible."

"Har, har.  So..." I tried to sound casual "when are you going to change back?"

"I dunno," she examined her new hands.

"Er, you are going to change back, right?"

She turned to me with such an angry expression, that for a second I was sure she was going to hit me.

"Just what the hell are you saying, Don?" she pronounced my name like a swear word.

"It's just that you seem to be so fond of this body, I was afraid you wouldn't give it up."

"Dear God, you must think I'm superficial.  You'd really think I'd take on a whole new identity just to get bigger tits.  No, don't interrupt, I'm going to go change now.  Jesus!"  She stormed out.

I held my head in my hands.  If I lived to be one hundred I would never understand women.  All I was saying was that I loved her body and...aw, to hell with it.

I found J.J. standing by The Wringer in her normal form.  She didn't look angry, just a little miffed.

"So where are Maria and Melody?" I asked, trying to make conversation.

"Melody changed back and they left.  They're visiting Melody's brother in Chicago this week."

"Oh, yeah.  Listen, honey..."

"It's okay Don.  I didn't mean to blow up like that.  It's just sometimes I wish you could see things from my point of view."

"Me too."  I hugged her, wondering at the distracted look in her eyes.

"Don," she said, "I'm not sure Maria put The Wringer back together right.  Could you look at it?"

Concerned, I opened the top.  "What's wrong?"

"There, by the rollers."

I stuck my hand in and instantly got the sensation of being roughly pulled between two punching bags.  It wasn't until I laid sprawled on the floor that I realized J.J. had tricked me into getting yanked through The Wringer.

J.J. picked me up and smiled.  "Gotcha!"

She held me by the top of my head in front of a mirror.  "I've been wanting to do this to you for a long time.  You're kind of cute this way."

I disagreed.  Flapping from her hand like that like a piece of paper, stunned expression of my face, all flat and soft...

J.J. laid me on the floor and removed my paper-like boxers.  She laughed when she saw what was left of my schlong, still as long as it had been, but squashed flat.  She giggled as she rolled and unrolled it like a noisemaker.

"Are you through?" I asked.

"Not quite yet.  I doubt you'll let me do this again, so there's a couple of things I want to try.  Melody gave me an idea..."

And my friends, though what happened next was truly unique, I'm afraid that it is also none of your business.
*

Finally, more than a day after the night of the cast party, both J.J. and I were ready to get things back to normal.  Gently she slid me into the rollers.  I waited for her to turn the crank, but she paused.

"Don?"

"Yeah?"

"Did you mean it when you said you wished you could see things from my point of view?"

"Of course."

"Good."

She turned the crank and I felt myself re-inflate.  I opened the lid of the box.

"Thank God that's ov...."  I paused.  That wasn't my voice.  It was...it was Melody's.

Thought I didn't want to, I looked down and saw what I dreaded.  The large breasts, the curvy legs, the smooth skin...I was Melody.

J.J. helped me out of the box.

"Why?" I stammered, still shocked at the change in my voice (not to mention the change in my gender!).

"Melody will be gone for a week and she said I could do this.  I wanted you to experience first hand how women are treated.  I'll turn you back in when Melody comes home...next week."

Of course, that is another story...

I got it one piece at a time
and it didn’t cost me a dime,
you’ll know it’s me when I come through your town.
I’m gonna ride around in style,
I’m gonna drive everybody wild,
cuz I’ll have the only one there is in town.

--Johnny Cash, ‘One Piece at a Time’


Brian
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