The next day, when Tiffany was back from work, she found the dolls out on the table again.
Oh no. Not again. Not today Blair.
Why?
Because last night it took us three hours to sort everything out. I still think our feet are mismatched.
Theyre the same size anyway.
Thats
not really a good answer.
Okay, well, since youre gonna be that way about it, Ill let you have both of them.
Blair slid both of the dolls over the table towards Tiff. Tiff eyed them skeptically, before picking up one of them.
Alright, but I want to practice a little bit. Is this mine or yours?
Honestly, I dont know.
Tiffany easily pried away the dolls head and set it down on the table. With one hand she took a handful of her hair and pulled, her eyes looking up. With a very soft pop, her head came off, dangling in her hands. She turned it around to look at her neck.
So, obviously this one is mine. Tiffany tucked her head under her arm and sat down on the couch, then set her head on the table facing herself. She took her doll and re-attached its head, backwards. She then picked up her own head, and set it facing backwards on her own body. It stuck fast, and then, despite her pulling on it, refused to come undone.
Getting the hang of it?
Yea, I just
Tiffany groped around behind her before awkwardly turning her head to find her doll on the table. She then righted the head on the doll, at which point she was able to easily rotate her head around to where it faced the right direction again.
Okay, said Tiff.
Do something else.
Like what?
Something for both of us. Like, I dont know, lets mix ourselves up again.
No, we dont need hour-long argument of whose hips are these.
Uh-huh. Do something else then. But cmon.
Tiff took Blairs doll and popped its head off, then did the same to her own.
So lets switch heads then, she said. She then reattached the heads to the opposite dolls.
There was a pause. Oh wait, said Tiffany, who was trying to put down the dolls. Nothing was happening.
Um
yea. I think, ok, yeah, muttered Blair, thinking out loud.
Blair, my hands waving. Im not waving it.
Yea, you erm
this is awesome! You switched our heads, yea, but we didnt detach them in reality. So its like, I control your body, and you control mine.
Tiffany watched mutely as Blairs body waved back at her precisely the way she willed it to. She made it stand up, with Blairs head still attached and spin around in a circle before sitting down again.
Pretty cool, huh? said Blair.
Can we change back?
No! Were staying like this. Plus, now Ive got these back. Tiffanys hands involuntarily held up the two voodoo dolls in front of her face before tucking them into her pocket.
Wow, just wow. Blairs hands covered her face, but her head squired away from them.
Stop touching me, giggled Blair, And stop making that face.
Tiffany, who was looking sullen, found her own hands trying to pull her cheeks up into a smile. In response, Blairs hands pulled her lips into a pucker.
Both girls broke down laughing.
So I guess we cant go out like this, said Tiff, You think we should order a pizza?
What about going out? I think thats a great idea.
Youre not serious.
Itll be a blast! Think of it. Well just have to stay together, and yknow, in sight of each other.
A ringtone started playing. It was Tiffanys. Tiff saw Blair raise an eyebrow as her own hands reached into her purse and removed her phone. Blair then used her body to take out Blairs own voodoo doll and flicked off its head. Catching on to what Blair was doing, Tiff tried to get out of the way, but watching herself move Blairs body proved awkward - she half-fell off the couch, while Blair lunged and managed to grab her own head off her shoulders.
Tiffs phone, she answered. This is Blair. Oh hi Jay!
No! said Tiff, before a hand covered her mouth.
Jay was a not-so-secret crush of hers. The two had been in a slow orbit for the past few months, meeting usually with other friends. Tiff had been in a relationship when she met him, and was now hesitant about moving forward due to the easy friendship the two of them had forged.
Tiffs body stood up and walked into the kitchen. Tiff tried to follow herself with Blairs now headless body, but unable to see anything, she stumbled and fell. Blair kept a hand over Tiffs mouth and, carrying her own head under her arm, kept the phone wedged against her face.
Hang on a sec, she said, Okay. No, Tiffs not here right now. But yea, wed love to hang out. Okay. Well meet you there. Later.
What the hell are you doing? said Tiff, when Blair finally let go of her mouth.
Im helping you out.
I dont need any help.
Uh-huh. Well, he wants to meet at Lonnies. And its not even late.
Okay, but were switching back.
An hour had passed. Tiff and Blair were at a booth, both starting on their beers.
We should switch back, said Tiff.
Nope, said Blair, who stuck her tongue out. Her own hand jabbed her in the cheek.
I dont like this. Whats he gonna think?
Hes gonna think its cool!
Were not gonna tell him!
Why not? Whatre you so embarrassed about?
Oh, hi Jay, I switched bodies with my roommate because we were playing with voodoo dolls, and how are you doing?
Yea, thats pretty good, only dont sound so cynical.
Hes gonna freak out. And well never talk again.
Freak out about what? said Jay, approaching from behind Tiff.
Oh hi Jay, said Blair. Shes worried youll freak out because weve been playing with some voodoo dolls. Wanna see?
Tiffany held up the dolls in the air.
Say what now, said Jay, squinting and looking almost concerned.
Sit down, said Blair. Tiffany moved over, but looked mortified.
Jay, still looking confused, sat down in the empty seat.
Howre you doing? he asked Tiff, raising his eyebrows.
Oh, you know, great. Tiff sounded nervous.
So these things, said Blair, Tiffs hands gesturing as if she were talking, are some voodoo dolls I got. They let us do all sorts of cool stuff. Like right now, our heads are switched. On the dolls, but not in real life. So its like, I control Tiffs body and she controls mine.
Run that by me one more time.
Oh, its hard to explain. Watch. Tiffany pulled the heads off the dolls and switched them. Then she dropped them on the table, reached up and held her neck with a look of relief.
What just happened? asked Jay.
Its
yea, its hard to explain, said Tiff.
But its easy to demonstrate. Cmon, said Blair.
Yes, do go on, said Jay half-mockingly.
Um
Well, each of these dolls represents one of us. So you do something to the doll, you can do something to the person. Thats basically all I know, said Tiff. But I guess well show you, but you gotta promise youre not going to freak out and hate me forever, okay?
Okay. I only hate you for like ten years, tops. I promise.
Yea, thats what you say now. So watch.
Tiffany took one of the dolls and popped it in half at the waist. Then she easily pushed up on the table with her hands, lifting her upper half a good foot above her legs and hips. She set herself down on her midsection on top of the table.
Ta-da, said Blair.
Wow, I just
Wow. With a look of disbelief, Jay picked up the two pieces of the doll, then looked back at Tiffany. For a few seconds he was just looking back at forth between the two.
So if I
he trailed off, then pulled the left arm off of the torso he was holding. He then gave Tiffanys wrist a tug, only for her arm to easily disconnect at the shoulder. Huh, was all he said.
Pretty cool, huh? said Blair.
Youre damn right it is.
What? said Tiffany. Before she could react any further, Jay had popped off the dolls head and right arm, followed by her real-life pieces.
I mean, Im so freaked out, I dont even known if were still friends. Im not even sure if I can remember your name, actually. No, I dont think weve met. Sorry, not interested miss. Jay kept on with the snide tone, as he took Tiffanys legs and hips apart, spreading her in bits across the whole table.
Okay, so I was just being paranoid, said Tiff. Can I get put back together?
Cmon, I need a drink. Lets take a shot. Jay picked up her head and carried her to the bar.
Okay, said Tiff, I guess this is what I was really worried about.
That I would find the fact that youve got a voodoo doll cool?
No, that Id end up a bunch of pieces again. Last night was enough of that.
Ah, well. Blair getting the better of you?
Yea, and then today, when it was my turn I accidentally switched our bodies and she wouldnt let me switch back.
Well, maybe you can get some revenge. You just need to get a hold of her doll. Its right near your right hand. No maybe your left. I cant tell from here.
But see she enjoys this.
And you dont?
No, I do. Tiff blushed.
The bartender, a huge man with numerous tattoos and an imposing beard, came and asked for the their drink orders.
Two shots of Jager, said Jay.
I see youve been to Charlies, said a girl beside him, gesturing towards Tiff. She had dye-red hair, a lip ring, and was smoking a cigarillo.
Nah, said Jay, nodding to Tiff. Shes just a knife juggler. In training.
Ha ha, said Tiff. Its voodoo something.
Ah, thats cool. You know, said the girl, I got something like that done. She pulled at what seemed like a piercing at the base of her neck. There was a sound like a zipper, and in a moment she was opened like a jacket, exposing a her ribcage and organs beneath it. While both Tiff and Jay looked at her dumbfounded, she rolled her eyes playfully and tongued her lip.
Thats
I dont even know what to say, said Jay, smirking.
The bartender set down the two shots, and took Jays card which hed laid on the bar.
Can you, I dont know, take everything off? asked Tiff. Despite herself, she was becoming less self-conscious.
In response, the girl pulled off her skin like a jacket and draped it over the seat.
Its a full suit, she said, smiling a bit. She flexed her bared muscles. They even have other skins you can get there. Although honestly, I kinda like this. Of course, if my guts start coming out, its kind of hard to get then all back in right. This one time
actually, you probably dont want to hear about it.
Oh, do go on, said Jay, giving Tiffs head a nudge.
Well, just dont be grossed out. So me and this one guy were getting it on, and he asks me to take off my top, and I do. For a moment, hes flabbergasted, but then after a minute, he tells me he was an anatomy major. So instead of getting it on, we had a dissection. With a happy ending.
Thats quite an image, said Tiff.
Ill drink to that, said Jay. He took a shot glass for himself, and pushed one over to Tiffs nose.
Jay, said Tiff.
Yea.
I cant take the shot. Im a head and I dont have any hands.
Well, of course. I was gonna help you. Jay picked her up and dumped the shot into her mouth, followed by his own.
Its going to be quite a night, he said.