"I'm getting too old for this shit," Jordan grumbled.
He'd found a spare moment to slip away behind the Santa's Grotto, and now crouched between two plastic pine trees. He unclasped the bulbous snowgirl head at the seam hidden under the scarf. Sweaty steam rose from within the suit.
Would it kill them to turn the heating down in this place? The suit was swampier than usual, his perspiring naked body constantly rubbing against the wood of the suit interior. The sweat dripped down his torso, pooling in the crotch sheath, such that his tucked-away penis felt as though it was marinating in his own juices at the same time as being crushed.
How many more years could he keep doing this? Talk about degrading. It was a shame the money was so damn good.
He wormed a hand down the neck of the suit and retrieved the packet of cigarettes tucked away in the hollow void of his left breast. He'd barely taken two drags before Michelle, his boss, poked her head between the trees.
"Jordan, I can smell that all the way over in Kitchen Appliances. And you know store policy - no removing the suit where the public might see you!" she berated him, grabbing the head and slamming it back into place before he could even stub out the cigarette. Smoke filled the inside of the helmet.
She gave him a hard shove back towards the shop floor. "There's a queue of dads out there a mile long, all desperate to meet Nippy. So get out there and start sitting on laps. And remember to give a happy wiggle when you give them their presents."
He took a long inhale of the hotboxed interior and headed back up, retrieving the Santa sack of festively wrapped, overpriced trinkets each man got after their minute with 'Nippy the Snowgirl' on their knee.
"There she is!" the customer at the front of the queue exclaimed, wrapping an arm around 'Nippy' and pulling 'her' onto his lap. Jordan shuddered, wishing the wood on the suit's butt wasn't so thin and flexible, as he felt the man's harder wood grind against it.
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