Dear Ryan Johnson,
I have fixed your plot holes. I await my cheque in the mail.
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As Poe and and Rose gathered around the holographic schematic of Snoke’s flagship, Finn pinpointed a single room deep within it. “That’s the control room for the tracking device,” he said with surety. “If we can get in there and take it out, we’ll be able to hyperspace to safety.”
“Hold up,” Poe interjected. “That’s the most secure room in the most secure ship in the entire First Order fleet, and you know precisely what is inside it? How?! Didn’t you say you were a janitor?”
“Uhhh…” Finn stammered. The nerves in his shoulders twinged at the memory. The First Order surgical droids were exacting, though even their tools could drift by a micrometer or two with repeated removal and replacement of limbs.
He’d lied when Poe had asked him his name when they first met. Or at least he’d abbreviated. His name hadn’t been FN-2187. It had been FUN-2187, a designation given to all troopers assigned to the Rest & Relaxation division of the First Order military. He’d been proud of the work he’d done there, bringing comfort to his fellow recruits, applying himself to his duties with an exuberance that had seen him rise up the totem pole, so to speak, becoming the favored plaything of many officers.
Even Kylo Ren had used him, and Finn still flushed with professional pride, knowing he had once been displayed on a pedestal beside the very helm of Lord Vader himself.
When they were finished with him, the officers had simply tossed him down on a computer terminal, with nothing to pass the time than reading the top secret data on the screens.
Poe was still staring at him expectantly. Finn had yet to determine how dating worked in the Resistance. Certainly it didn’t seem to adhere to the perfect efficiency of First Order romance, as he’d yet to see a delimbifying droid anywhere, or else he’d have had himself delivered to Rey’s quarters weeks ago. Despite his ignorance, he had a suspicion Poe wouldn’t like to hear the truth.
“I, uh, mopped the floors in there,” he replied.