Well you did say you’d do anything to help, sweetie. You should watch what you say around pregnant women with autoclosets, teehee. And you've certainly helped mommy take a load off.
It’s so liberating to be free of that belly. Like I’m no longer a prisoner in my own body.
Sweetie, it’s just a little womb transplant, no need to get upset. Oh, it must be the hormones reaching your brain. Starting to feel overwhelmed? Vulnerable? Is it the pain in the back that is the worst, or the tightness in your belly, like you’re a balloon that could pop at any moment? Ah, the ache in your pelvis. That’s just your pelvis softening and widening into a beautiful big birth canal.
You think it's bad now, wait until your little brother starts playing soccer with your bladder!
Don’t be ashamed to have a big cry. There’s ice cream in the freezer if you need to just let it all out. And if that doesn’t work, your father will be home soon, and he always wipes away my tears and calms me down. A comforting cuddle, those big strong arms cradling your belly... it will soothe those baby hormones of yours.
And if ever the maternal impulses seem too much... embrace them. Just let them wash over you. It'll be easier that way.
Anyway, I gotta run. You think I’m wasting a minute of my freedom? I’m heading out for a run, knowing the only thing getting in the way is your penis between my legs.
I’ll be back in a few hours, I promise. Tomorrow at the latest.