So this is what gods feel like… Goddamn, check out the tits on this girl.

Not bad, huh? Dumb bitches. All the power in the universe. Zero protection against magic. If kryptonians are so smart how come they never heard of magic wards?

You can fix that right? I mean if we can find a spellbook in a secondhand store, what’s to stop them doing the same?

Haha. They can try. Kinda hard to cast a spell in the bodies I left them in though.

Ooo, what did you do with their souls?

See those worms down there?

The humans?

No, dummy, over there. Use your MicroscopicVision. See that park two miles away? Okay, look near the water fountain, the one near the dumpster, no, the other dumpster. Now look down. Under that leaf. If you see molecules you’ve gone too far.

Whoa, this is making me dizzy.

See them?

All I see is an earthworm crawling inside an empty pepsi can. Gross.

Aww, Power Girl found them a Fortress of Solitude.

Eww, what’s that other one eating?

Haha, looks like Supergirl figured out they need to eat shit to keep their disgusting bodies alive. At least they've still got that dazzling kryptonian intellect! Hahaha.

Oh, gross, I just x-rayed visioned them by mistake - they're literally full of it. How much shit have they been eating? That’s really them?

What’s left of them. Figured I’d put them somewhere they’re not going to cause us trouble. Nobody is ever going to notice them, except if they have to scrape them off the bottom of their boot. Well they seem to be settling in. What do you say we go break these babies in?

What did you have in mind?

Fucking on the surface of the sun?

I don’t know if I feel that way about you, bro.

We’re immortal now. We’re going to be spending a lot of time together. An eternity. We may as well get to know each other. Here, how about I give you a taster?

*wet kissing sounds*

Holy shit.

Uh huh. If the lips are that good, imagine what my kryptonian pussy tastes like.

Nggh fuck, I’m so wet.

So… race you to the sun?

Hold up. Don’t we want to squish them first?

Why bother? They’re like 99% water. If I wanted them dead I could boil their little bodies with heatvision from here. Leave ‘em. They’ll be dead when winter comes. Or when the next bird sees them. They’re harmless. Get it? ‘Armless!

Oh no.

What?

Your jokes are gonna get real old after eternity.

*two sonic booms heading into orbit*