“Are you ready to surprise your owner Billie?”
“Woof! Woof! “
“Good girl. Now Steph will be home any minute and when she comes through that door I want you to show her just how much you missed her and give her a big wet kiss. Can you do that?”
“Woof!”
“Perfect. Oh, I hear her getting close. Get ready.” Lucy said as she disguised herself as the sexy wall decal she was previously.
Meanwhile, outside the door I’m fumbling my keys in my one free hand while trying not to drop the cluster of groceries my other hand is barely holding onto. “Come on you damn keys. Stop being difficult.”
Just as I’m about to drop everything and make a fool of myself I hear someone approach behind me. “Need help Steph?”
I turn and see Rich, the tall, handsome brunette from a block down, who was out on his daily run, jog up to me after seeing my struggles. (Did I mention he’s a professional Baseball player? Probably not relevant, but I think it is.)
“Oh, h-hi Rich. Um, no, I’m fine, just being my typical clumsy self.” I say so gracefully.
“Don’t be silly. Here let me grab those bags while you find the right key.” He reached over and with out effort lifted all 10 heavy bags from my straining arm like they were nothing.
I shook out my arm now that it wasn’t in pain and then gave him a thankful smile. “Thanks Rich. You’re always so helpful.” I said while finding the right key and putting it in the door.
“Don’t mention it. Maybe tomorrow we can go and grab coffee or something. There’s this new Coffee Shop downtown if you’re interested?”
“Oh, I’m, I’d like that actually.” I say timidly while I turn the key and begin to open the door. As I pull the door open, Rich steps inside the house and just as I walk in behind him and shut the door I hear him yelp. As I turn around I see Billie leap up out of nowhere and plant a wet sloppy kiss on Rich’s face which makes him stumble back and almost bump into me.
I immediately go over and rip Billie away from Rich and scold her. “Bad Billy! That is no way to treat a guest in our house! I’m so sorry Rich, she never does thaaAAAAAHHHHTTTT! Holy crap! What the fuck is going on!?!” Laying near my front door surrounded by groceries was one of the most bizarre sights I had ever seen. Where Rich previously stood, was now a freaky naked limbless and faceless female with tattoos all over her body and no distinguishable private parts. But the most distinct tattoo on this female torso was the tattoo of a beautiful aqua haired maiden surrounded by flowers on the torso’s midsection.
“But how…why did this…I’m so fucking lost.” I walk over to inspect what I assume used to be Rich and as I do, I here a loud ‘Schlrrrp!’ as the Lucy decal peels itself off the living room wall and reforms into the new and improved Lucy Android. “Aw man! That was supposed to be you!”
“Lucy? How are you back to….I don’t know, is this normal for you now?” Lucy nods her head giddily. “Ok, but how?”
“Apparently your command before you left triggered my dormant abilities from the app and now I’m an android version of myself.”
“And let me guess, this was going to be your revenge on me?”
“Mhm! But poor Richie just had to get in the way.”
I stare back down at the limbless body in the doorway. “Is he ok like this? He’s not breathing and I don’t see any orifices on his body.”
“He’s fine. He actually filled with memory foam now because I was trying to have Billie’s kiss turn you into a unique body pillow. The tattoo is actually what his face would look like if it were on his body pillow head. But I thought it would be neat to make the face a tattoo.”
I reach down and grab Rich with both of my hands and am surprised at how light he is to lift. “Oh wow, he really is just a body pillow now, isn’t he?” I set him down gently by the couch.
“Yep. And now you’re going to join him. Billie, give your owner a-“
“Nope. Billie, sit.” She instantly plops down and flips her tongue out. “Lucy I prohibit you from transforming me into anything without a direct order from me to do so.”
Suddenly I see the blue glow of Lucy get brighter before dimming again. “Damnit! I still have to take commands in this form I guess. Fine, but I’m keeping Richie here as my body pillow for a little while.”
I give her a glare while I growl quietly, “Fine, you can keep the body pillow for a week, but then you have to give it back to me, understood.” Lucy happily nods her head in agreement as she walks off with her new body pillow. I felt bad for Rich getting caught up in our shenanigans… but I was also looking forward to having his body pillow form all to myself after Lucy’s week was over. I’ll definitely make sure to have Lucy restore him before the baseball season starts back up in 2 months.