) Fifteen (
Chapter Four – Through Different Eyes


October 8 –


  A dark silence fell through my mind. It’s like one of those dreams you have in which all hope is lost. Where the only option is to open your eyes and reassure yourself that it was just a dream. But I wasn’t going to open my eyes. I had a mission to complete. I had to find my way through this dark abyss. I had to fight my own conscience. Or was it even my mind I had to fight?
   I didn’t feel like myself. I felt like a different person. There was this strange cold feeling that flowed over my body, like I was underwater in a sea of ice. I knew I wasn’t myself. I was lost in someone else’s mind. I would never find my way now. It seems like the only option is to open my eyes.
   I couldn’t do it. Literally, I couldn’t move. I just lay there, cold, and lifeless. I had this song running through my head. I had never heard it before, but I knew it. It was called “In the Shadows” by The Rasmus. The song just kept repeating, like I was in a trance. The music started to fade away, leaving me alone again. I shivered. Here I was again. Alone. Naked. Stripped of everything I once knew. I felt a familiar warmth flow over my nude body. A hand. A warm, soft hand.
   The hand felt like it was searching my body for signs of life. It was a familiar feeling, yet still so alien. I recognized the hand. It was Hannah’s hand. But I didn’t recognize what it touched. I wasn’t me. I was indeed different.
   The darkness slowly faded away. A beam of light flooded over my body. I could hear sounds now. Cars, people, just your average city sounds. After much effort, my eyes eased open. The first thing I saw was Hannah’s face light up with a feeling of excitement. She thought I was dead.
   “Where am I” I heard someone ask.
    Wait…
    I asked that…
    But it wasn’t my voice…
    It was the voice of a teenage girl. A sweet sounding, innocent voice.
    I tried again, to make sure it was me.
    It was.

   “M…Mathew?” I heard Hannah ask.
   I opened my eyes all the way. My mind was racing. I wasn’t in my body at all. It was the DNA. It worked.
   “What do I look like, Hannah?” I spoke in that sweet little voice again.
   “You are beautiful… I…can’t believe it worked so well.” Hannah said as she reached for a small mirror.
   “Here, see for yourself…”

   I was beautiful. This girl in the mirror...was it really me? It couldn’t be. I lifted my hand to my face and ran it across the small bunch of freckles on my cheeks. It was real. I looked at my hair. It had turned a light brown color with a single streak of my original blonde hair running through it. It was long, really long. It ran all the way down to my…..


…Breasts?
  I sat the mirror and leaned forward on the couch. My clothes were gone, likely thanks to Hannah. My body was a wonder to behold. I reached up with both of my little hands and ran them over my new breasts.

Real.

  They were perfect too. Small C-cups it appeared. (Though I had no experience at bra sizes for obvious reasons) In the middle of each was a small pink nipple, the same color as my small feminine lips. My hands continued down my slender, tan body to the empty space between my legs. Sure enough, my penis was gone. All that was there was a small slit. This would take some getting used to.
   I sat up all the way and looked at Hannah, who was smiling at my new body.
   “You know, there’s a bigger mirror in my room.” She said as she stood up.
   I stood up too, stumbling to get my bearings on my tiny little feet. Hannah was taller than me now, and we used to be the same height. I walked away from the couch, still admiring my body.
  I was a girl now. It was all real. It was permanent.
  “You need a new name, you know…” Hannah told me as I just stood there staring at my body in her mirror.
   “This doesn’t seem to be a big deal to you, Hannah. I mean, what am I supposed to do now? What about Jenny? All of those DNA vials in Tiffany’s bag are female, so there doesn’t seem to be any turning back. I guess I’m stuck with a fucking cunt the rest of my life.” I felt tears in my eyes after saying that. Mixed emotions, some call it. I turned to Hannah to see the expression I had only expected. She stood up and walked over to me and put her arms on my shoulders.
   “You know what? I have had a fucking dick since I was born. I’m supposed to be a girl. I try not to let it get to me; I’m a generally optimistic person. I swear you won’t be stuck like this. You’ll find a way to change back. If you don’t, just don’t let it get to you. You’ll find your girl, and if she loves you like you said she does, she’ll understand. Just… be positive. I don’t want you to go all emo on me now. Besides, you make one hot girl. Seriously, that body is to die for.”
   “Thanks…Hannah. You give some damn good advice.” I said, smiling at Hannah.
   “So, what about a name?” She asked again, this being a more appropriate time.
   “Cassandra, the name on the vial. I kinda like it too.”
   “Well then, Miss Cassie, let’s get some clothes on you, you are bound to be freezing. I doubt any of my clothes would fit you… especially since most of them I made myself to accommodate some ‘extras’ if you know what I mean” She said with a giggle.
   Hannah found some old clothes of hers from a few years ago that were at least acceptable. She suggested that we run down to the department store and pick me out some clothes that actually fit me. And most of all, I needed to get a bra. All of Hannah’s were custom made for three breasts, and that obviously wouldn’t work for mine. So I put on Hannah’s big fuzzy jacket to hide the fact that I didn’t have a bra on, some baggy jeans and fuzzy boots. I looked a little funny, but I didn’t care.
   
   Going to the clothing store as a girl is a totally different experience. There are all of these sizes I have never heard about, and so many choices! I think going there changed my mood greatly, and I started thinking like a girl for the first time. Hannah and I had so much fun here; it was obvious that she didn’t get to do something like this with another girl very often. It made us feel almost normal. I got my breast size measured so I could pick out a bra, and with Hannah’s help, I got a couple. I picked out some jeans that actually fit me, and some shirts too. My favorite shirt was a black, low cut shirt with a white butterfly on the side of it.
   I was almost scaring myself, I had been a girl for a little over 6 hours, and I was already shopping for clothes. But, I couldn’t get sidetracked. Girl or not, I had to find Jenny.  I probably didn’t have much time. She would already be…
No.
She’s fine.
She has to be…

  Hannah and I managed to spend almost two hundred dollars at the store, but she didn’t seem to mind. Somehow she had a wallet full of money. I wonder what her job is.
  We left the store to head back to her place. It was almost nighttime, and there as a beautiful red sunset over the horizon. We walked slowly along the boardwalk on the ay back, talking about this and that. About how I met Jenny, seeing her in the gym, meeting Tiffany and driving all the way looking for her. Hannah told me about her early childhood and that she lived as a boy until puberty. It was nice to have a calm time to talk to someone. Hannah and I had developed a good friendship over the past week. Little did we know of the road ahead…

When we turned the block towards Hannah’s apartment and we saw them. Firetrucks were all over the place and smoke was pouring over the whole block. And to only make matters worse, there were flames coming out of Hannah’s apartment building.
  “No…” said Hannah quietly as she just stood in awe, staring at the commotion. We moved closer, or as close as the firemen would let us. It was obvious that nothing could be saved. The building was completely gutted by the flames, and so were the adjacent buildings.
   The thing was, Hannah couldn’t tell them that it was her apartment because she wasn’t legally living there. All we could to was watch.
   “Hannah…I’m…”
   “It’s okay Cassie, It’s just an old apartment. We’re okay, that’s all that matters.”
   As Hannah was talking, something caught me eye. There was something glistening on the ground near where we were standing. I looked closer to see that there was a small, shiny stone, more like a marble, on the sidewalk. It was an almost reddish-gray color with a glistening white center.
   “Hmm, what’s that?” Hannah asked as I picked up the strange marble. It was the size of one of a shooter marble, the big ones.
   “It’s a marble, but it looks like it’s glowing…”
   “Wait a second… I have one of those…” Hannah said as she reached in her pocket and pulled out a similar marble, but hers was blue on one side and pink on the other and had a faint purple glow to it.
   “That’s odd…” I said as I stuck mine in my pocket. “So, where do we go now? We need a place to stay, and we don’t need to blow money on a hotel room.”
   “You have a car don’t you?” Hannah asked me
   “Yeah…I do… It’s parked on the other side of town… but it’s not big enough to sleep in really…”
   “No, we aren’t sleeping in it, silly, I know an old friend we can stay with… and we have some driving to do.”

   So, we got to the car and drove off into the night, leaving the chaotic city behind us…

To be continued…

© Stray-Pixel 2008