“Ow! Stupid frogs..”
I pull a dagger from beneath my cloak and brace my arm, ready to throw. After about half a second, I can feel the energy being channeled through my body, flowing from my shoulder down to my hand. I let the spell guide my aim and release the built up tension, hitting the toad right between the eyes. It emits a comical groan before falling on its side, tripping on its own legs, as it always does. I used to chuckle at it every single time. But not anymore.
“I hate the marshes.” I mumble under my breath.
“Perhaps we should map around it next time? Instead of whining like a cry baby everytime we have to travel through here.” The voice resonates inside my head.
“Did I ring?” I sigh, twirling my hand in front of me.
“Well no, but I figured you needed help since you keep making the same mistakes!” Dahlia says as thousands of microscopic shimmering particles emerge from my fingertips, condensing to solidify her form. “Besides, that’s a level 47 toad, which means it has..”
“I know, I know.” I look around us, making sure I’m not gonna get hit by another poisonous dart. “Do you sense anything?”
“Let me see.” She rises above my head and holds a hand to her ear as her detection charm silently swells through the wooded area. Apart from the fluttering sound of her wings, nothing comes to break the still air. “There’s a Giant Moth nest that way, about 30 meters up in the trees.” Like a dolphin piercing the water’s surface, she takes a short dive forward. “Nothing else in a 100 meters radius.”
“Thanks, Dahlia.”
She flies back to me, landing a teensy kiss on my cheek. I lift my hand, allowing her to sit on my recurved fingers.
“Would you fetch a Cure All from my satchel please? I’d prefer to take it before the effect of the poison starts settling in.”
“So let’s see…” She takes off and hovers down to rummage through the bottomless bag attached to my back. “Mmmmh.”
“I don’t like the sound of that..”
“Seems like we’re out of Cure All.”
“Out?! What do you mean out of Cure All?”
“We used the last one to repair my burned wing yesterday, remember?” Landing on my shoulder, she sits on her knees, bringing her right wing in her lap, tenderly caressing its iridescent feathers.
A deep feeling of compassion quickly replaces the irritation in my voice. "Of course."
I bring my right hand up and she snuggles against one of my fingers. She's become so small, yet so vital to both of our survival in here. She often talks about her emotional attachment towards her wings, how crazy it feels to actually have wings. Well, not actually but… She says they've become the single most important thing to her. That she loves them so much it hurts. Like a puppy that’s so cute you’d want to hug it to death. And I believe her from the bottom of my heart. And I would do anything to anyone who would ever dare ruffle them.
"Prim?" She whispers.
I completely zoned out. "We better get going, I guess?"
"We should, yeah." Standing up, she breaks her back trying to deadlift my hand. "The poison will take this arm before nightfall. See?"
She's right, of course. My nails have already started to vanish, slowly melting away under the effect of the toad's poison.
I stare up at the canopy and squint. 3:32 pm in-game time. "It's gonna be close."
She interlocks her fingers, keeping only her index and middle fingers raised and mutters an incantation. Soon enough, the blood in my legs feels like it's boiling. "Let's not waste any more time, then."
---------
"JUST LET US IN!!" No matter how hard I hit the door, it doesn't budge an inch.
"Stop it, it's no use." She tugs on my clenched fist with all of her might, which is very little. "You're going to take damage if you keep at it."
"It's 5 minutes past closing time, can't they make an exception just this once?" I say as I rest my head against the wooden door.
"Have you ever seen an NPC make an exception? Plus, the interior isn't even loaded anymore. You cannot get in."
I sigh. "Ughh.. Well let's hope this doesn't get too bad."
Toads above level 45 have a 100% chance to poison their target with debilitating limb disease, one of the many cruel debuffs this game has to offer. I raise what's left of my arm to inspect it once more, moving it around and about to free it from my cloak. I stored my bracer earlier after my hand had started receding because it kept sliding off. And now, slightly below my right elbow, my arm ends in a rounded nub. I grab it with my intact hand and twist it around, examining the skin surrounding it. It’s like nothing I’ve ever felt before.
Dahlia tried many times to explain to me how she feels when she disintegrates back into my body, but I never really managed to grasp her description of it. When you close only one eye, you don’t see black, it's like there's nothing to see anymore. When we travel as one, she doesn’t feel nothing, but rather it’s as if the notion of feeling becomes entirely irrelevant to her. And that is exactly what is happening to my arm. Internally, I am cursing the dev that coded the algorithm that spawned that toad there. But physically, I don’t feel… Lacking. Which is particularly strange.
Dahlia flies up to it. "Does it hurt?" She asks inquisitively as she runs her tiny hands across my stump.
"No." I answer. "It kind of itches, but that's all."
Not sure where to go, I stand around and scrape the mud off my boots. Meanwhile, Dahlia takes some time to stretch her wings, rising high above the rooftops to admire the virtual sunset. She plungles back down as I'm finally done kneading my stump. And set it and my hands on my hips.
"C'mon Prim, let's go get a drink."
“Pretty sure I’m not in the mood for that tonight.” I walk away from the shop towards our place but she flies around me to block my way. “Shoo, get back in here.” I swipe my stupid arm through the air, missing her by a long shot.
“On the contrary, it’s the perfect night for that. It’ll cheer you up.”
“Noooooooooooo I just wanna lay in bed and watch my arm shrink to bits.”
She puts her hands on her hips herself, looking serious. “Primrose Dragonslayer. You will loathe yourself to sleep, but at least you’ll be tipsy while doing it. Come on.”
She swoops down to grab a fold of my cloak and symbolically drags me towards the inn where I disheartedly follow her. Inside, familiar faces, and faces we’d love to forget. At this point in time, every player has become familiar...
“Welcome to the Rotten Egg, what can I get you?”
The tall guy behind the bar withstands my aggressive stare without blinking. The stupid grin plastered across his face is so fake that I can almost read the code that traces the shape of his lips.
“Pint of cider and a thimble of scotch.” My voice is devoid of emotion, but he doesn’t even care.
“Coming right up, lass!”
As he cycles through his animations, I scan the rest of the room once more. Everyone looks so tired of being here. The old clans are dead, all that remains are wandering souls, too scared to risk their lives anymore. Instead, we hang on to this lie, hoping help will one day come from outside.
“Pretty sure one of them has at least one Cure All to spare.” Dahlia whispers in my ear. “How about Damian, he’s pretty chill, no?” She points to a Hunter, hunched over what seemed to be a cold bowl of soup.
“And admit that I need help? Nah. I’ll endure it at least 10 times before even asking him for help.”
“Why not?!” She lands on top of the bar, her vibrating hummingbird wings gradually coming to a complete stop “Isn’t he your friend?”
“It’s not about being a friend or not, Dahl. We’ve been stuck here for 5 years. I should have known better, hell, we should have known better. Crossing the marshes without checking our inventory was stupid.”
“You’re probably right…”
I grab an empty bowl from over the counter, instantly triggering a death stare from the barman. I wouldn’t mind paying off a bounty if it counted as stealing because it makes such a perfect little chair for Dahlia. Or I could just buy one, stash it, and reuse it when we go out. She removes the needle from her hair and let it cascade down to her hips before climbing up on the bowl and crossing her legs. I take a sip out of the thimble before handing it to her and we cheer.
Accessing my inventory using the player interface, I unequip my cloak. Even though Inns are safe places, I let my hand run across my tunic, systematically checking my throwing knives. I sigh and bring my elbows up on the wooden bar only to notice I’ve only got one left. Still progressing up my arm, the poison has started deleting my biceps.
“That’ll be eleven gold!”
“I know!!" I interrupt him. "We buy the same shit every time! Can you…. Ugh, fuck off.” I throw the coins at his face but instead of hitting his programmed little smirk, they evaporate right as they touch his skin.
“That one’s yours!” He says, handing me back one piece of gold.
I flinch. “No, you're wrong." I run a playback of our transaction in my head. "It's.. twelve pieces of gold. Ten for the pint, and two for the thimble.”
“Eleven gold for both!” He simply answers, leaning against the counter.
“Look, I’ve been drinking this goblin piss for as long as I can remember, I think I know how much it costs!”
After a fraction of a computational second, he switches lines : “You’ve got a discount going on. Please, it’s on the house!” And with that, he walks away to the back room.
Discount? I shake my head. What discount?
I raise my eyebrows and my pinky simultaneously, which conveniently brings up my character sheet. Under the Status Effect tab, a few things are listed :
Increase stealth score by 75% - Midnight Tunic of Sneaking (dark purple)
Walking, running, and tactical rolls no longer affect stealth score - Shadow boots
Two handed weapons disabled - Debilitating limb disease (Marsh Toad Venom)
Dexterity reduced by 25% - Debilitating limb disease (Marsh Toad Venom)
Merchant’s Pity - Debilitating limb disease (Marsh Toad Venom)
“Merchant’s WHAT?!”
I slam my fist on the bar so hard that Dahlia almost takes a tumble off of her seat. Clutching her drink in her arms like a newborn baby, she steals a look at my screen and covers her mouth with a hand. I click on the effect to read the description.
Merchant’s Pity : Physical disabilities bring out the merchants' soft side, offering you 10% better prices when buying or selling goods. Applies on mission rewards.
"That takes the cake. I can't even be respected anymore, I have to accept charity given by strings of letters and pixels. I'm a wounded animal begging for mercy."
Her face sunk halfway inside her bucket-sized drink, Dahlia does anything to avoid meeting my eyes. She taps her nails against her thimble rhythmically, swishing the contents as if she was making soup, or inspecting a nearby lock of hair. Then, a loud voice breaks the silence lingering in the room.
"Well if it isn't my favorite rogue, hanging around in my favorite place."
His voice is harsh, like he's got a handful of nails stuck in his throat, but those who know him know his heart is sweet and kind. With heavy steps, he makes his way towards me and Dahlia, carefully avoiding the roof's support beam that would hit him across the head.
The poor wooden stool he chooses to support his weight creaks and winces, but hangs on. With each of his movements comes a cacophony of armor plates clicking and clacking together.. As he was approaching us, I tried to subtly hide my shortened arm out of his field of view. Luckily for me, he's sitting to my left.
"So, what are we drinking to, today? The usual stuff I suppose?" As the barman comes back into view, he orders a pint for himself.
"Hey Flint," says Dahlia, innocently, "you wouldn't happen to know Full Cleanse by any chance?"
"Shut it!!" Without thinking straight, I slap her off of her bowl, spilling what's left of her scotch on her tunic and sending her flying to the other end of the bar. "OH MY GOD DAHL I'M SO SORRY!!"
I jump from my seat and rush to her side, clutching my ribs as the Soul-Link that unites us transfers half of her sustained damage to me. Lying on her side, her hair are now a tangled mess, poor little thing. I cup my hand and let her pull herself on board, gradually getting her head back on her shoulders again. I flood the top of her head with kisses as I keep apologizing.
"I'm sorry, I'm so sorry, I love you, I didn't mean it…"
"I'm fine, I am."
She winces and reaches for her own ribcage, where I hit her hardest. Like she did earlier, she joins her hands and gestures towards herself, welding her bones back together in exchange for a bit of magic power.
Flint thought the situation to be more than hilarious, of course. "Girls, I assure you these moments are what I keep fighting for." His eyes dart to my side. Did he see it? At best he must think I'm hiding something behind my back, but he makes no mention of it. "What was the question again, Dahlia?"
She looks up at me nervously. "I'm not dumb, I'm not gonna hit you again. I'll just…" I sigh.
I pat her on the head and set her on the bar again. Throwing her head between her calves, she untangles the knots in her hair before braiding them from bottom to top, locking the enormous bun in place with her discarded needle. Standing straight again, she stretches her wings, carefully folds them against her back, and then clears her throat.
"Full Cleanse. I figured maybe that…"
"What kind of paladin do you think I am?" He hits his breastplate with his clenched fist. " I didn't rank first in Healing, Defense, and Rejuvenation by learning Water Walk!"
He looks back at Dahlia, then at me, his thick brows frowning as low as they can go. He extends his gauntlet towards me and I put my hand in his.
"Prim?"
This time, he sounds more paternalistic, reprimanding. He leans his head towards me, clearly aware that I'm hiding something. Hesitant, I slowly retract my gloved hand. I shouldn't be so ashamed, it's just a debuff after all..
I jump when Dahlia's head touches my arm. Her face squished against my stump, she flaps her wings harder and harder until it comes into view of Flint. I push my stool towards him and bring my stump forward. At the sight of it, he unequips his gauntlets. In his burly hands, my limb looks like a dried twig, ready to be snapped in half. He runs his fingers across it, discreetly imbued with an Appraising Spell.
I give him back my other arm to his command, kneading their flesh up and down, evaluating. At one point, he seems to be weighing them compared to each other. Naturally curious, Dahlia floats around the scene to take a closer look. Judging from his face, it seems to be a daunting task, even for him. I’m not sure if it’s a good sign or not, but I give him the time he duly needs.
“Why didn’t you cure it immediately?”
“We ran out of Cure All.. I guess I lost count of how many we had.”
“The poison has progressed too much, at least for this time of day. I’m not completely out of mana yet but what I have left is too little for a complete cure.”
Hope finds its way into my heart. “So you could restore a bit of it for me?” Had I leveled my Charisma stat a bit more, I would’ve casted a Convincing Charm in a pinch.
“The Toads’ poison works differently from other debuffs, since it’s organic. The more it spreads, the faster it propagates. Did you notice it also started attacking your other arm?”
A jolt of electricity fires up in my brain. I yank my hand out of his to catch sight of it. My vision trembles. He’s right. Half of all my fingers have vanished in the last few minutes. To the watchful eye, and especially to my own up this close, my skin can be seen receding with every passing second.
“At this point I can’t do much. Even if I restore part of your limbs, the magic is only going to accelerate. I would only be buying time until the inevitable happens somewhen during the night.
“What do I do?!” I ask. “I can’t wait until the shops open tomorrow morning, I’m gonna be limbless!! I won’t even be able to buy a Cure All!”
“I could do it for you, we leveled Carrying Crow last week. I can do the shopping for you and bring it back!” She does a backwards loop in the air, as excited as ever.
“I think the shop is more than 100 meters away from home, though. On level 1, the skill’s range is pretty limited.”
“Oh.. Yeah, you’re right...”
I extend my hand to grab my pint but my fingers have continued shrinking even in the last few seconds. I modify my grip on the handle, bringing my stump to the tankard, just in case. Silence falls again in the Rotten Egg.
-------------------------
The door closes automatically behind us as the last wisp of cold air sneaks inside the apartment. Leaning against a wall, I take a deep breath and sigh. What an exhausting way to end the day. As Dahlia flies off to the fairy-sized corner of the room, nestled in a little nook halfway up the wall, I take a good look around us. At the assembled mess of pixels that has been our home for so long now. To the untrained eye, it would look and feel as flawlessly real as the world outside the Simulated Reality headset. But the little texture imperfections in the brickwork, the absence of dust cloud that accumulates on the cushions when you forget to vacuum after 3 weeks, these kinds of details start to shatter the illusion when you realize they're part of the everyday scene.
“Okay, big day tomorrow. We only have a few hours of sleep left until the shops open so let’s make it count. I don’t want to get us into any more trouble.”
“Flint swore he was going to help us get there, why are you so worried?” Dahlia says, as she unequips her armor.
“It’s… *sigh* I don’t know.” I walk towards her alcove. “How am I supposed to lead us when I’m so…”
She flies back to me, gently setting her hand on my cheek. “It’s going to be okay, Prim. I promise.”
“But what if it isn’t…” My voice cracks...
“It will be!”
“I looked in the codex. **sniff** Under 50 Constitution, there’s a random chance that limblessness will become permanent.”
“Prim, you’re at 40, the odds can’t be that high, stop thinking about it.”
“It’s 10%. It’s a possibility.”
“You should come over here and get some rest instead of getting worried sick!”
“I don't want to become a cripple, Dahlia! Not inside a FUCKING GAME! It’s something to be lying in a bed God fucking knows where, hooked up on life support while we dream our twenties away. But I’m not gonna let myself become the useless remnant of a player waiting for someone to unplug me. I promised I would take care of you when we started the Transfiguration Quest, that I would be able to defend both of us, and look at me now.”
I lift what remains of my left arm towards her, a narrow stump above the elbow, disappearing faster than ever. My right shoulder has been empty for half an hour now. I take a second to focus on summoning my interface and clumsily navigate my inventory to unequip everything left on my body, triggering the developer-locked top and panties to spawn. I could feel it since we had left the inn, but actually seeing the lack of toes on my right foot gives me another shock.
Dahlia hovers down to meet my eyes once again... The sparkle in her eyes is.. indescribable. Compassion, care, love…
“I never would have done it if I didn’t have complete trust in you, Prim. After all, you didn’t force me to touch the statue in the temple, did you? I knew that relinquishing my status as a player was risky, but becoming your familiar was the best decision I have taken since I decided to log on that day 5 years ago.”
I start to sob. An ugly, uncontrollable, wet sob. I uselessly try to hide my face with my stump but can only reach up to my mouth. I wipe the tears off my cheek and she grabs onto my arm to hug it and cover it with kisses. A short laugh escapes my lips. She’s right, as always. It’s gonna be okay.
“Now come over here and drink this for me, would you?”
“Okay, yeah. I would love to.”
She speeds off to a corner of her little room to a vial that’s almost twice her size and filled with a swirling light blue liquid. Filling up a thimble using the faucet on the side, she carries it over to the edge of the precipice and pushes it towards my lips just as I kneel to level my face with it. Today, it tastes like buttercream. Homemade, not store-bought. The kind that would be smeared on the birthday cake of a 3 year old in an inch thick layer. Absolutely delicious.
I prop myself up on a nearby chair and close my eyes as the spell quickly propagates in my body. This one works in one go instead of gradually, and I have passed out from it in the past so I’m not gonna take any chances today. My remaining toes lose all communications with the wooden floor. The chair under me feels as if it’s bubbling, moving, although it’s my body that’s changing, not the furniture.
Soon enough, my calves get jabbed by the edge of the seat and I cross my legs. After another few seconds, I open my eyes to a heavenly sight : Dahlia, floating down like an angel, wearing a delicate green silken robe. She lands gracefully right in front of me and extends a hand to grab on to my stump.
“You should be easier to carry, tonight.” She says, mockingly. “Come here my love.”
My body finishes shrinking just as we embrace each other. Although she’s become one hell of a useful familiar, being the same size as her for the night is by far my favorite moment of the day. She locks her arms around my waist and purses her lips. The fluttering of her wings intensifies over the course of a few seconds until the chair finally eludes me and we take off. Even after 5 years, flying still takes my breath away. And to say that Dahlia gets to experience it every single day. I sometimes wonder who got the best deal at the end of that Quest…