(TG/TF - M to Yor Forger, Implied Mass TF)

The only thing worse than dressing up in a costume was dressing up in half of a costume. Zach tugged at his dress with a blush, dearly wishing that he’d remembered to buy a backup outfit for this Halloween. Unfortunately, not only had Polly revealed that her morals mirrored her name, she’d also broken up with him too soon for him to show up as anyone other than Yor Forger.

The character was from one of Polly’s favorite shows, something about a hot assassin, a cool spy, and their psychic kid or something. He’d watched enough of it to think that it wouldn’t be too bad of an idea for them to go as a genderswapped couple.

Luckily, Amy was a cool enough rebound girl not to mind. Or maybe it was unlucky – Amy had stuck to a female character herself, showing up as Aqua from Konosuba. It was a pretty clever joke, all things considered – Amy was about as far away from the helpless alcoholic as could be.

Well, she was normally. However, she’d broken her straight-edge streak at this party and had evidently come to the conclusion that wine was the most delicious thing since the discovery of beef.

“Heey, Zach! Check this out!” Amy winked, flicking open one of her costume’s fans and squirting a jet of water from it. “Nature’s beauty!”

Zach took a step back to avoid the stream, flinching as he bumped into someone. From the thud that followed a second later, he guessed that he’d just sent someone to the ground.

“Oh hey, I’m sorry…” He turned to see a pink-haired girl on the ground, sniffling and rubbing at her eyes. “About… That. Wait, how’d you get in here? This isn’t a kid’s party.”

Something about the girl looked awfully familiar. Maybe it was the alcohol hitting him too, but it took Zach a second to realize she was dressed just like Yor’s daughter. Something told him that this wasn’t a coincidence; that it was trouble.

Luckily, he didn’t care enough about kids to care, especially strangers’ kids. “Sorry, it’s really none of my business.” He sent Amy a look, hoping she’d catch his drift. She was way more open-hearted than him, and he worried she’d waste the rest of the night trying to help someone else’s kid.

He found himself pleasantly surprised at the sight of Amy knocking back another glass of wine. She met his eyes and winked, before playing her tongue lasciviously along the rim. At this rate, he’d need to take her out drinking more often…

“Heyyy,” the kid pouted, tugging on Zach’s dress. “My Papa’s gone missing and it’s so loud and I can’t find him!” She punctuated each sentence with a small hop, to convey her distress.

Zach shook his head, rolling his eyes. Still, he couldn’t deny that the kid was a cute one. Her dad probably really missed her.

“Awh, c’mon!” Amy half-sauntered, half-tripped over to Zach’s side. He became keenly aware of just how she stank of booze. “Whazzaproblim with helpinerrr?”

Zach instinctively wrapped an arm around Amy’s waist to stabilize her. “The problem,” he looked down the child, “is that I can’t play beer mother to you, and normal mother to this kid at the same time!”

“Izjustbubbly!” Amy huffed, at the same time the girl positively squealed.

“You’re gonna be my Mama?” Her eyes practically glowed, and Zach realized he’d made a tremendous mistake.

“Wowwww, America’s sooo progressive these days!” Amy snickered. “You should do it! You’ll be fiiiine.”

Zach had his doubts. However, he also was attracting a few stares from the other partygoers. “Okay, fine. Just for now though, until we find your Papa. Got it?” That came out a little harsh. He paused. “Do you understand, little girl?”

Really, it wasn’t like he’d have been able to resist for long anyways. He always had a soft spot for kids, unlike Amy, who…

A loud clap echoed through the room as Amy slapped Zach’s ass. “Wahoo!!! Attagirl, you’ll do great!”

“Girl!?” Zach blushed.

Amy waved dismissively. “Or woman. Whatever! My point stands,” she took a glug of wine, “you’ve totally got my blessing! So let tomorrow’s worries be tomorrow’s worries!”

“So very insightful of you,” Zach sighed.

“Well, I am a goddess,” Amy giggled.

“Or just dressed as one,” Zach muttered. Amy shot him a glare that was just a little hurt, and he wondered if she had gotten drunk enough to think… No, there was no way. Still, he should apolo-

Amy swatted his ass again. “G’wan, get! We don’t need any party poopers over here!”

To Zach’s surprise, he was able to feel the slap through the cushioned padding he’d put on to fill out his Yor outfit. He was even more surprised to find that the padding had gone missing somehow, a discovery made by rubbing his sore, generous buttocks.

“Mama’s fat butt got spanked,” said the little girl without a hint of shame.

“Who taught you to speak like that?” Zach snipped at her, realizing a second later that he was lacking a very vital piece of information. “Oh. And… What’s your name?”

“Anya is Anya, and I’m this many old!” The girl proudly held up her hands, rethought how many fingers she was using, and tried again.

Great. Someone had trained her to play her character perfectly. This really might be a headache. “Right… And who’s your father?” Zach tried a different route. With any luck, he’d be someone easy to spot, like that cute Goku across the room. Hold on, cute?

“Papa is a sp-” The girl cut off her enthusiastic chirp with a cough. “Um! I mean! Papa is Papa!”

Instead of annoying, something about the kid was oddly adorable.

“All right, fine,” Zach sighed with a smile, taking her by the hand. “We’ll find your Papa in no time at all, okay?”

The girl gasped delightedly before nodding so quickly Zach feared for her safety. Then, like a bloodhound, the girl tugged Zach after her.

It wasn’t necessarily that Zach was out of shape. He just wasn’t used to half-running while bent low enough to help the girl keep hold of his hand. That’s what he kept telling himself as his dress tightened around his chest.

“Anya, Anya! Slow down!” Even his voice was starting to sound a little lighter. Fortunately, none of the partygoers seemed to notice. More of them were distracted by their own bodies, for some reason looking down at themselves in confusion.

However, Zach had caused enough of a commotion to find one person’s eye.

“Looking for someone?” A steely voice called, and Zoch turned to find Fiona. Or Ryan. Or… Something like that?

He furrowed his brow, remembering that Polly had roped Ryan into dressing as Spy X Family’s third wheel. But even though this stranger was wearing the same outfit that Ryona had bought, something about her was… Was familiar?

“Have you seen Anya’s Papa?” Yoch asked Fiona, running a hand through his long black hair self-consciously.

“What, lost Polly already?” Fiona sneered.

“Polly?” Yoch blinked, unsure of the name. She swore it was supposed to spark some sort of memory, but she didn’t know any Pollys around.

“Who’s Polly?” Fiona blinked.

“You said…”

“I asked if you lost Loid already,” Fiona stressed the words.

Yor fidgeted with his top a little self-consciously, tugging his breasts into a dress that insisted on not fitting right. It was like it was worn by a man or something. Which… He was, wasn’t he? No, none of that was the point!

Yor shook his head from side to side, clearing her thoughts. She had to focus! If she couldn’t get Anya to Loid, then he’d definitely… Well, she didn’t want to think of what would happen! She was only worried that it, whatever it was, would!

“Mama’s thoughts are all jumbly,” Anya offered unhelpfully.

“Oh? Drinking again?” Fiona arched an eyebrow.

“N-no!” Yor blushed. “I was actually taking care of one of my friends when Anya found me, thank you very much.”

Fiona’s reply was an arched eyebrow.

“Yes! She’s over there!” Yor turned, pointing back towards where she’d come, at Am… Aqua, that was the girl’s name. Right? And there she was! Drinking… herself… unconscious… Oh.

Yor wrinkled her nose as a moment of discomfort passed across her face. She rubbed at her cheek, finding it smooth as it had ever been, and perfectly soft.

“Good job.” Fiona’s words might have sounded nice, but something about her tone was oddly sarcastic. And Yor wasn’t a genius, but she was fairly sure that she could tell when someone was making fun of her.

“And what’s that supposed to mean?” Yor huffed, taking a step towards Fiona and wobbling for a moment. Weird. Did the entire world just grow around her? She could have sworn that she was taller than the other woman a second ago.

“It means,” Fiona’s eyes flicked to Yor’s side, then widened. “Oh, damn!”

“What?” Yor followed her gaze. There was nothing there, though. So she couldn’t imagine why Fiona would be bothered by nothing where there was supposed to be Anya oh no.

“You lost her again! Don’t worry, I’ll find her, and then!” Fiona didn’t finish the thought, sprinting straight into a mob of partygoers.

Yor felt, for just a moment, that something was wrong and completely ludicrous about this. After all, she was so sure that she knew a lot of this from some show, a show about where Yor was an assassin and Anya’s adoptive mother, and the adoptive farmer was the cutest dreamiest-

What was she thinking? She wasn’t into… Well, actually, she was exactly into guys like that. People who were well-put-together, with patience and kindness. And it was for that reason that she was going to find Anya first!

Yor swept her eyes from side to side, finally catching sight of Anya tugging on some stranger’s sleeve. She could tell right away that guy was trouble: he had a scarred eye and an ugly, large nose.

“Excuse me!” She dashed towards the man and promptly pulled Anya away from him.

“You watch yourself!” He snarled. “I’m a wanted man, you know. I have the death sentence in twelve systems!”

Odd. Yor was fairly certain she’d memorized all of the potential targets Garden had given her. She gave him another look-over, but nothing about him looked like someone she was supposed to kill. “Well, I’ll be careful then.”

Apparently this was the wrong thing to say. He pulled back from her, reaching towards the holstered gun on his belt. “You’ll be dead!” Then he choked and fell to his knees, one hand on his throat and the other between his legs.

Only a few people in the room were able to truly see what happened.

As the man said “You’ll,” Yor had already sprung into motion. She lowered into an easy crouch, all the better to put the weight of her hips into any motion she made. Then, quick as a snake, her left arm snapped out. Her knifed fingers easily sank deep into his throat.

By “be,” Yor had balled her other hand into a fist, aiming lower. She hit his stomach with three quick, sharp punches. The motion from each blow flowed into the next, and by the third, the momentum was enough to push even Yor back half a step.

She’d planned for this, though. As he said “dead,” she used the room to snap her leg up, her knee solidly impacting his family’s jewels with a crack loud enough to draw attention to herself.

“How DARE you try to pull a gun in front of my Anya?” She roared down at his prostrate form. Her right arm pulled back, prepared to strike him at the base of his skull and paralyze him. A strong hand wrapped around her wrist, and she turned, ready to attack again.

“Hey, easy Yor,” Loid gave her a bright smile. “You don’t have to act in self-defense anymore. I think you got him.”

Funny. For a moment, Yor thought that her husband had noticed how close he was to having his arm dislocated. But that couldn’t be right. He was a psychologist, not a… Hm. She didn’t really know the term for a bones-doctor, did she? No, that look of panic in his eyes must have been from seeing someone threaten Anya.

“Oh! Loid! I’m so happy you’re here, look who I found!”

Anya stared at the downed man, before looking back up to the couple. “Mama’s really scary sometimes.”

Yor squeaked, but her husband’s warm hands calmed her enough to smile and look back at him. “Well… Shall we get going home, then? This party doesn’t quite seem right for Anya here.”