(Man to Ashtray)


Luke grinned, his walk breaking into a jog as he neared his new friends.  Funny how he never knew there were so many cool kids in his neighborhood.  Looking back on it, that probably had something to do with how his high school kept him too busy to hand out.  Math, physics, chemistry... all of those classes and for what?  A few more weeks of waiting for college acceptance letters?  He didn’t have anything else to do; no workplace would hire someone who’d only be able to work for less than a month.
Luckily, he’d been able to find a group of kids his age.  Better yet, they had fake IDs, so they were able to buy him booze.  But everyone had to mix it up a bit, and today they put the drinking off to try out smoking.
It was a hell of a day, which understandably led to a downer of a night.  Luke had forgotten to change clothes before going home, and the stink filled the dining room as he arrived late to dinner.  His mother, a former smoker, noticed it first.
Ma blinked slowly, then her nostrils twitched as she sniffed at the air experimentally.  Like a homing missile, her gaze settled on Luke.  “Did...  Did you smoke today?”
“Sorry I’m late.”  Luke offered by way as an apology and as a change of subject.
Ma glossed over his question, standing up to get a better whiff of him.  “Luke, you smoked today!  Who gave you cigarettes?”  Luke pushed away one of her hands as she patted him down for a carton he’d secreted in his back pocket.
“Does it matter?”  Luke grunted.  The grunt was followed by a groan, as she noticed the bulge behind him.  He didn’t resist as she grabbed the pack, popping it open to find it missing the four sticks he’d had earlier.
She frowned, walking over to her purse.  She grabbed her wallet in a huff, then tossed a twenty-dollar bill on the table.  “I’m not one to steal form my kids, and you’re not getting this back.  You are not—and I repeat myself—not to spend this on more cigarettes.”
Luke gazed at her in disbelief.  “Ma, what the hell?”  He winced at the volume of his own voice, and footsteps marked the arrival of Jill.  The teenager was the last person he wanted in on this conversation.  Luke had prided himself on being the responsible older brother, and for her to find this...
“What’s going on?”  She chirped, just as he knew she would.
“It’s nothing.”  The words left his mouth at the same Ma spoke.
“Luke’s been smoking.”  She said it matter-of-factly, and that made the situation worse.  It wasn’t done in anger, wasn’t tinged with disappointment.  Just a flat, resounding statement that lingered in the room like the stink of his clothes.
Jill gasped, raising her hands to her mouth.  “Oh my God!  Don’t you know that’s bad for you?”
Luke felt a flash of anger move through his body, but he couldn’t help but in the end, the guilt prevailed.  “Ma smoked when she was younger!”
Ma shook her head, incredulous.  “Honey, I don’t want you to go through the same mistakes I made!  You could get lung cancer—that’s what Dad died from, for God’s sake!”  She crossed herself absently.
Luke repeated the gesture even as he brought up his next point.  “What about our aunts?  They light up like chimneystacks!”  The comparison was remarkably accurate—he’d seen Aunt Garey light up two cigarettes at a time.  “Even Gammy Hildy smokes!”
“Well, mom and my sisters are... different.”  Ma rubbed her arm.  “Listen, honey, that’s not the point.”
Luke seized the advantage, seeing the faint distress on her features.  “No, the point is, I’m an adult now.  I’m going to keeps smoking, because I’m an adult, and there’s nothing you could do about it.”  In that moment, Luke realized his mistake.  What he’d taken for distress was actually distraction, and his mother sent him a glare she usually reserved for door-to-door salesmen.
“Luke, you aren’t an adult as long as you live under this roof.  After college, you can make your own choices, but for now...”  She trailed off, biting her lip.  It was clear she was going to say something she didn’t want to.
“Ma...”  Luke tried to offer her a way out.
“No allowance.”  She managed, ignoring him.  “No allowance for the rest of the summer, unless you show me you’re mature enough to know how to treat your body.  Keep the twenty, buy yourself a... a new Warhammer model or something.”  He knew Ma prided herself on her knowledge of his interests.
“Ma...”  Luke tried to apologize.
She misinterpreted him, throwing fifteen more dollars on the table.  “Right, sorry.  Forgot how much they are.  Go get a new box of those...  Storm troopers?  I’ll help you shop for paints.”  Luke didn’t have the heart to correct her on their name.  Instead, he took the money, sighing.
“Yeah.  No more smoking.”  Luke gave them an apologetic smile.
He had no right to be angry, and everyone in the room knew it.  The best thing to do would be to do as she asked.  Luke walked past Jill, who had been watching the display attently.  “Take it easy, sis.”  He felt her eyes on his back as he left for the comic shop.
Luke could only hope they forgave him.  They were right, too.  What was he doing with his life?  He’d make some models, maybe find new people to hang out with.  One thing was sure, he’d have to give up smoking.

A month later, and Luke really needed to smoke.  The thought just crossed his mind; he had no idea how it came to him.  It might have had something to do with how his aunts and nieces were staying over, and most of them seemed to be conjoined to a cigarette.
It started as an evening dinner, but extended into a weekend visit.  Maria and Karli were staying in his hobby room, and Aunts Garey and Maddie were living in his backup modeling room.  None of them liked playing the same board games he did, and Gammy Hildy was glued to the TV, watching C-Span.
He loved all of them, even though he hadn’t seen Gammy Hildy since he was five.  But he had nothing to do.  Slowly but surely, boredom began to set in, accompanied by its lifelong partner—stress.  He was stuck indoors, since it was ‘courteous’ to be around in case his disinterested relatives wanted to talk to him.
He’d run out of conversation topics on the second day, and since then had little choice but to listen into their conversations, none of which interested him.  Hell, Maria and Karli were allowed to leave.  Why was he the only one trapped in his own house?
Luke propped his head up with one of his hands, determined not to fall asleep at another of Aunt Garey’s ‘old country’ stories.  His eyes wandered across the room.  He’d already counted the ceiling tiles, read the backs of the books, and C-Span was still boring as ever.  Finally, his eyes alighted on his Aunt Garey’s purse.  There were at least three packs of cigarettes in there—surely she wouldn’t mind if he’d had just one.
He waited for them to get animated about one of their old memories, quickly slipping a spare pack from her purse.  “Hey, I think I saw something outside.”  He muttered, slipping out the door.  He glanced behind him as he moved, finding that not a single one of them had noticed.  He shook his head, missing one pair of eyes that followed his exit.
Out on the street, Luke took a deep breath of the mercifully clean air.  Jill was lucky; she had to stay in her room which had mercifully elude the smoke’s grasp.  It was almost a shame to pollute such a clean night with smoke, but needs must.
He pulled out his lighter, a stylized tool he’d bought more for decoration than utility.  It still could serve its intended purpose, though.  Luke cupped the cigarette in his hands, flicking his lighter’s wheel.  A few sparks were the only reward for his first attempt, but on the second a small flame leapt from the steel, bringing a smile to his lips and a light to the cigarette’s tip.
Luke took a long drag, letting his exhale go into the night.  It wasn’t good for his body, but damn was it good for him.  Just his time to be alone with nothing but his own thoughts.
“Luke?”
And his sister, apparently.  He turned to Jill, his eyes wide.  “Listen, Jill.”  He paused, realizing he didn’t actually know what to say.  He messed up?  He was under a lot of stress?  He needed some time alone?  Too late did he realize he could have just hung out with Jill in her room.
She noticed his delay, sighing.  “I’m going to have to tell Mom.”
He fell back on his hands.  “Yeah.  You do that.”
Without further ado, Jill ran back into the house, hollering at the top of her lungs.  “Mom!  Mooom!”
Luke sighed, taking one last drag on the cigarette.  “Not like that.”  He mumbled belatedly.  The boy put his hands on his knees, standing up stiffly.  As an afterthought, he crushed the cigarette under his heel.  Time to go and face the music.
As he turned towards the door, Luke realized the music was coming to him—scream-o, not his favorite by far.
“Luke, what the hell?”  His mother snapped.  Apparently, she had been put in a bad mood by her relatives’ activities.
He held up a hand, to try and forestall the conversation’s inevitable conclusion.  “Now, Ma—I can explain.”
“Inside, now!”  She jerked her thumb over her shoulder, storming in without waiting for his response.
He walked in, an apology in his throat.  It died on his lips when his sister spoke up.
“Luke’s been smoking!”  She grinned from ear to ear vindictively.
Before anyone else could respond, he looked to Jull exasperatedly.  “Why?”
“Because you won at Uno yesterday.”  She replied simply.
“Really?”
Aunt Maddie laughed dismissively at the two, waving her hand.  “It’s no problem!  Luke wants to smoke, so let him!”
Gammy Hildy nodded sagely.  “It is good for the boy!  Makes him strong!”  An old-fashioned cigar was clenched between her wizened fingers.
Ma sighed, burying her face in her hands.  “There are so many things wrong with that statement that I can’t even begin to explain.”  She raised her voice from its low mutter, glaring at her son.  “But that’s not the point.  What is the point is that he promised not to smoke.”
“Hey, so little Luke broke a promise.  It could have been worse.”  Maria smiled at her younger cousin.  The tattoos running up and down her forearms served to strengthen her case for once.
Her mother, Aunt Garey, nodded.  “I seem to remember a certain someone promising not to marry that Johnson boy.”  She grinned as Ma flushed.
“That’s beside the point!  How did he even get those?”  She gestured to the carton of cigarettes that Luke had been trying to give to her.
Jill perked up.  “He took them from Aunt Garey!”
The room exploded into commotion, Maria and Karli exchanging a knowing look as they quickly exited the room.  Aunt Maddie roared with approving laughter.  Ma started to scold her, even as Aunt Garey rifled through her purse, hunting down the missing pack.  Luke gave his sister an incredulous look.  Jill simply stuck out her tongue.  But above all of that, Gammy Hildy’s roar rang loudest.
“Dieb!  Junge Luke ist ein dieb!”  She looked around to find confused looks on everyone’s faces.  He is a thief!  Scheiße, I ask you to learn German...  No matter.”  She smiled, puffing a large cloud of smoke at Luke.
He blinked rapidly, tears of pain in his eyes.  The cloud stuck to his face, invading his nostrils, his mouth.  He shut his eyes, trying to wave away the attacking smog.  When it finally cleared, he opened them, seeing the cold stare of his mother.
It actually seemed to lower the temperature of the room by a few degrees, even causing a draft that Luke definitely shouldn’t have been able to feel on his balls.  He looked down, finding himself completely naked.
“Oh my God!”  He shouted, covering himself with his hands.  It was like his clothes had evaporated from his body.  “What is this?”
“A little country justice, boy!”  She glanced to Ma, tutting.  “You are a lucky girl that I am able to cast this far from my home.  I do not know what you had in mind when you decided not to learn any spells.”
Spells?  Casting?  Magic?  All of these thoughts were making his head hurt.  And his gut.  He doubled over, suddenly winded as though someone had punched him in the stomach.
Luke’s hands flew to his aching gut, and he felt his fingertips brush against something cool and smooth.  The boy looked down to find a cool, ceramic disc where his belly button should be.  It didn’t match the tone of his skin, either—a creamy white invader on his stomach.
“W-what the?”  He muttered, running his fingers along the disc.  It started to pulse and twitch beneath him, warming at his touch.  Slowly, it started to expand, growing a little bit at a time.  Luke looked up to find it wasn’t the only thing that was growing—the entire room looked larger.
Luke blinked as he realized that the room wasn’t growing—rather, he was shrinking.  Inch by inch, the floor crept closer to his vision, and he looked up to find everyone in the room was watching with rapt attention.  His family all tracked his descent, and Luke had never felt so small, so insignificant in his life.
The thought of escape crossed his mind, but the second the thought crossed his mind, his legs stopped working.  No, more than that—he lost control of his entire body.  It wasn’t a numb sensation, but something closer to when he was drunk.  He could feel every motion of his body, every sensation—but he wasn’t in control of anything from his neck down.
Slowly, Luke started to sit down.  He screwed his face up with effort in an attempt to stand, but it was like his body was made of lead.  His nude form touched the floor, and Luke shuddered as an odd sensation ran across his lower body.
He could feel the carpet against him, yet he could also sense his skin wasn’t relenting.  It was like his form was caked in clay, but he could feel through it like it was his skin.  A tilt of his head revealed that his legs were being coated in the same ceramic material that was on his stomach.
As the white gloss moved along his legs he raised his knees.  His skin stretched, any part that was in contact with the floor remaining glued there.  A thick webbing formed between his crossed ankles, raising until it was halfway up his chest.  All of the skin from his legs was pulled with it, creating a smooth curve, leaving him to wonder if he was becoming a mug.  Then, the skin folded over itself, creating a smooth lip.  It was like his legs had become a hollow cylinder, but the changes still showed no signs of stopping.
Slowly, inexorably, the bottoms of his feet drew closer to his body.  His scrotum flattened out, and Luke groaned as the sensation of his testes being pressed down, enveloped in a ceramic glaze of their own.  The flesh there pulled to meet his expanding feet, melding together to form a smooth foot to whatever he was becoming.  Luke opened his mouth to protest, but had to bite back a moan as the glaze crept its way up his cock.
It started slow, like a pair of cool lips at the base of his member.  Though his mind rebelled, his body had to respond to its instincts, the blood rushing to his dick.  As his shaft extended, the cool rush followed it, rapidly warming to his body heat.
His cockhead twitched as the glaze overtook it, wrapping tight around his flesh.  The mixture of the cool ceramic and his fading body heat was an incredible rush.  Coupled with the tightness of the seal, it was like a warm suck that wouldn’t let him go.
Luke blinked with a startled realization—it wouldn’t let him come, either!  It was like he was trapped in a perpetual state of being on the brink of release, unable to finally have climax.  He looked up to his grandmother, unable to process the shame of begging one of his own family to give him release, much less his own grandmother.
The women around the room were staring, all except Jill.  His sister had a mortified look on her face, like the first time she’d seen the film Alien.  Her eye twitched slightly, yet she stared on unblinkingly.  Luke took a sadistic pleasure in that, thinking that it served her right.
Gammy Hildy rolled her eyes, muttering something about ‘men’ under her breath.  She looked to Jill and waved the girl out of the room.  “I’ll call you back when it’s safe, dear.”  Jill nodded emptily, a thousand-yard stare in her eyes as she no doubt fought to repress what she’d seen.  The aunts laughed as she stiffly walked from the room, and even Ma smiled at that.
Gammy Hildy returned her attention to Luke, muttering a faint incantation.  She finished with a small clap, a twinkling in her eye.
At that, sweet release swept across his body.  He shut his eyes, taking a deep shuddering breath as he came.  It was a sensation unlike any he’d had before, not even in his most private of moments.  Luke’s entire body was rigid, unmoving—including his cock.  He could feel his something flow from his cock, and yet the muscles didn’t so much as spasm.
Moreover, his cock felt thicker at the flow continued.  Luke looked down to find that rather than semen escaping his member, it was a thick glaze, trialing in an elegant spiral down his member.  It was an intricate, detailed vine, and as Luke continued to stare, he found he could make out small thorns beginning to make their way from the glaze.
His gaze moved to his cockhead, the glaze working over that.  Petals layered along the head of his dick, and he frowned as he noticed he now had an elaborate rose covering his dick like a thick condom.  On the bright side, if his cousins returned, they wouldn’t see him erect—though anyone with half an imagination could guess what was under the flower.
As if to prove this, Jill walked back into the room, hew jar falling slack as she beheld the large rose covering Luke’s member.  “You know that I can still see it.”  She said flatly, crossing her arms.
A triumphant smile flashed on Gammy Hildy’s face.  “And yet your eye isn’t doing that twitching thing.”  She waved dismissively as Jill opened her mouth to reply.  “I say it’s fixed and done.  And if you still have a problem with looking at it, then I might have to something about your eyes.”
Jill’s mouth snapped shut with a clack, and she glared at Aunt Garey, who was unable to suppress a snicker.
Gammy Hildy nodded with satisfaction.  “That’s what I thought.”  Jill rolled her eyes, but offered no further protest, instead redoubling her interest in her brother.
Luke followed her gaze to find his hands upon his knees, a ceramic plate dropping from his elbows to his thighs.  Then, his rim dipped in places, forming deep ravines.  Luke gasped, realizing that they were just the right size to fit cigarettes. He wasn’t becoming a mug, he was becoming an ashtray!
He opened his mouth to complain, to protest at the situation.  Instead, he found his jaw locking open, no words coming to his porcelain throat.  Though he couldn’t see under his chin, he could feel his body lose its warmth.  The changes continued upwards, and Luke choked for a moment as his windpipe sealed shut.  His eyes teared even as his lips hardened, and he tried to convey his distress.
Was he going to die as a lesson not to smoke?  That would by the cruelest irony of his life, which looked like it was going to end at any minute.  Except for the fact that his lungs weren’t burning.  Luke blinked as he stopped trying to breathe—a monumental effort, but it paid off.
Though his every instinct screamed at him that he needed air to survive, his body felt no worse for the wear.  Luke realized it was probably because he didn’t have lungs anymore—or internal organs, for that matter.  Though it meant his survival, he wasn’t too sure of whether or not he was okay with this change.
There was a flicker of cream in his peripheral vision, and he watched as the unrelenting changes moved into his field of view, closing off his nostrils.  Suddenly, all smell seemed to dissipate from the room.  He shut his eyes with discomfort, planning to just keep his eyes shut for the remainder of his transformation.
The changes had another plan in mind, though, and his eyes were forced open bit by bit as the glaze overtook them.  His vision clouded, as though he was viewing the world through a filter.  Slowly, the fog cleared, and Luke realized he was seeing the world through a pair of pearlescent orbs, unblinking, yet not dry; unmoving yet able to see more than his older scope of vision.
He’d never realized just how much detail could be found in peripheral vision, all that was missing was the ability to concentrate.  He could even make out his sister’s form, though she was nearly perpendicular to his position.
Luke felt the porcelain seal off his ears too, and realized he was able to hear the room perfectly fine.  It was like all of his senses were intact, save taste and smell.  Smell was probably due to the fact that there was no breath to pull air into his nostrils, and taste... he didn’t want to think about how he’d find he’d taste again.
The changes moved to his scalp, and Luke suddenly remembered that back in grade school, he wanted to have his hair dyed.  Ma had shut it down, of course—something about how she wouldn’t have a son with frosted tips.  Luke would have laughed at the irony, if he was able to.
Instead, Ma snickered, pausing when everyone in the room turned to stare at her.  “It’s nothing, just something about how I swore I’d never have my child have frosted—you know, it’s not really that funny.”  She finished with a mumble, and Luke couldn’t help but think ‘like mother, like son’.
Gammy Hildy leaned down to pick up her new ashtray.  She examined his form up and down, nodding with satisfaction.  “And now for part two of the punishment.”
Part two?  After what was evidently the opening act, Luke couldn’t wait.
The family matriarch opened her purse, dropping a box of cigars onto the table.  “Everyone, smoke!  Let’s fill our new ashtray!”  Without further ado, she took a lengthy drag on her cigar, holding the smoke in her lungs.  As she exhaled, the smoke flowed not toward the ceiling but toward Luke’s nostrils.
The smell was overpowering—a ripe, woodsy flavor that burned on its way in.  Though the smoke had nowhere to go, no lungs to fill, it dissipated was soon as it passed through his nose.  Everyone in the room noticed, and Gammy Hildy laughed with mirth.
“I made sure none of this smoke will linger in dear Lisa’s home.  So everyone, light up—that includes you, Lisa.”  Gammy Hildy snapped at Ma, a carton of cigarettes materializing in her hand.  Luke recognized the design, the same style on the packs she used to burn through each day.
Ma bit her lip, but waved her off.  “I really can’t.  Even though I hope your magic would keep me from getting cancer—”  Gammy Hildy quickly waved her hand along the carton, a faint look of embarrassment crossing her wrinkled features.  “—I made a promise to Dale, and I’m off cigarettes.”
“How about e-cigs?”  Aunt Maddie pulled a pack from her purse, tossing them to Ma.  “Got ‘em for you so I wouldn’t feel lonely if I was the only one smoking.  Vanilla flavored, just like your favorite ice cream.”
Luke could see Ma’s resistance crumble away, and she slowly put one in her mouth.  A second later, and she was sighing contentedly, letting out a trail of smoke.  Luke felt the wave of vanilla wash into him, a faint smell that dissipated after a moment.
Aunt Garey grinned, striking up a fresh cigarette.  “That’s the spirit!”
“Can I smoke too?”  Jill grinned teasingly at their mother.
Aunts Garey and Maddie laughed as Gammy Hildy scrambled into her box of cigars, pulling out a particularly choice sample.
Ma was quick to push it away.  “Jill’s still far too young for that.  She can stay down here thanks to your magic, but I won’t risk her having cancer.”
Gammy Hildy blinked, then spun the cigar between her fingers.  Before Luke’s startled eyes, the cigar changed into a pack of fruit gum.  “Who wants her to smoke?”  The elderly woman asked, her face the picture of innocence.  “It’s just a stick of gum, dear.”
A scowl settled across Ma’s face, but anyone could tell she was hard-pressed not to laugh.  She nodded tightly, her mouth losing the struggle to keep from smiling.  To her credit, she did her best to hide it, taking a deeper drag on the e-cig.
Jill squeaked with pleasure, grabbing the stick of gum and chewing it happily.  “Oh wow, this is good!  How did you get it to taste like this, Gran-gran?”
Gammy Hildy beamed.  “Magic.”  All of the older women in the room groaned, and Gammy Hildy glared at them.  “What?  I haven’t made that joke in years!”
“Yes, but that didn’t keep you from saying it every day when we were kids.”  Aunt Garey took a long drag on her cigarette.  Her eyes widened as she saw how much of the end she’d just burned, and she quickly tapped the butt against Luke’s leg.
A miniature pile of ashes formed atop the bottom of Luke’s plate.  They cooled the second they touched his cool body, and it felt like someone had dropped some sand on his body.  Before he could reflect on it further, Gammy Hildy spoke again.
“Your father, girls.  He was much the same as Luke here, only his temptation was this awful cologne.  So, I decide to mete out a little punishment that way; make him into a skunk that’s not used to the scent of its kind.  Oh, you should have seen the look on his face!”  She slapped her knee, cackling with laughter.  Abruptly, she paused, raising a finger in the air.  “But now I need to go to the bathroom.”  She lowered her cigar to the ashtray, setting herself to extinguish it.
Luke’s eyes followed the descent of her cigar as it moved towards his groin.  Unable to do a thing, he was helpless as its hot embers pressed against the tender marble of his skin.  It was the most curious sensation, a heat not unlike touching a burner, but without any of the searing, the crisping of cooked flesh.
And yet, the embers carried with them an alien pleasure, almost a caress that reminded him of his power.  His cool form had hot life breathed into it once more, a reminder of his imperviousness to the heat.  It would have been a pleasant sensation for his cock, were it not for his human instincts screaming at him to run from the fire that would surely end his chances of reproduction.  As it stood, he was conflicted.
So was everyone else in the room, apparently.  Ma was almost white with shock, and the Aunts swallowed nervously.  Even Jill had the decency to look away.
Gammy Hildy noticed their stares, already halfway to the restroom.  “What?  He’s fine!  I made him to last.  Enjoy!”
Luke sighed inwardly, really hoping they wouldn’t.  But this was a day that hadn’t been living up to his expectations so far, and it looked like it would continue in the same manner it had.  Aunt Garey leaned closer, curiously eyeing her nephew.  He felt uncomfortably like a specimen under a microscope’s lens.
She poked his forehead, as though she expected him react to it.  Then, she pressed her cigarette against his inner thigh, still watching his face attentively.  Though he felt the heat, Luke couldn’t react to the cigarette placed upon his cool skin.
It burned, but not as much as it had earlier.  This time, he was able to focus on the heat, the warmth flowing through his ceramic form.  Then, she ground the cigarette slightly, and a blossom of pain reminded him of the situation.
“Garey!”  Ma gasped, slapping her cousin lightly on her arm.
Aunt Garey recoiled, a few ashes spilling between Luke’s crossed legs.  “What?  Linda, I just wanted to make sure he was fine!  See, not even a whimper from him!”
Luke would have begged to disagree, but his current form left him wanting.  As luck would have it, Jill was the one to speak on his behalf.
“You know he’s an ashtray, right?  I don’t think he could respond if he wanted.”
“But!”  Aunt Maddie held up a finger.  “By that logic, he also shouldn’t feel a thing.”
Luke tried to give voice to his protests.  As though fate was mocking his efforts, Aunt Garey placed her cigarette in his mouth, laughing with mirth as it fit perfectly between his lips.
To Luke’s surprise, it almost felt like he was smoking.  The only difference was that his body was taking a steady drag on the cigarette, the smoke passing through whatever passed for his windpipe in an unbroken stream.  Luke decided to take it as a blessing, drowning out what his family was saying.
A moment passed, and some damnable part of his mind wondered if he still needed to exhale.  No sooner did he realize that than his chest started to ache, some phantom pain from where his lungs were.  All at once, it felt like he was drowning in smoke, choking to death on a cigarette he couldn’t keep from smoking.
“So since he’s smoking mine, mind if I try one of yours?”  Aunt Garey leaned across the couch to Aunt Maddie, a grin on her face.
“Garey, you have like six packs of cigarettes, just smoke one of yours.”  Maddie waved her off, a scowl forming on the woman’s face as her sister scooted closer to her.
“But you have those new mint ones, right?”  She pointed to the box in Maddie’s lap.  “Come on, fork one over.”  Aunt Garey’s fingers twitched as she egged her sister on.
Maddie considered her proposal, an uncharacteristic frown on her face.  Finally, she settled on a decision.  “Buy Karli something nice for her birthday, and I will.”  She tapped the box, pulling out an unlit cigarette.
Aunt Garey grinned, snatching the cigarette from her hand.  “Deal.”  She lit the cigarette with a smile, taking a long drag.  She let it out in Luke’s face, and he was flooded with another onrush of smoke, clouding all of his senses for but a moment.  When it dissipated, he found not only was there a minty flavor left in his mouth, but the cigarette was also gone.
Luke focused his gaze upon Aunt Garey, finding the woman was happily smoking both of the cigarettes in her mouth, held next to each other.
A moment of silence passed before she noticed everyone’s stares.  Even Gammy Hildy, who had just re-entered the room, had a look of abject disgust on her face.
“What?”  Aunt Garey took a deep drag on both of the cigarettes, holding the smoke in her lungs for a moment before exhaling.  “There’s a reason I was nicknamed ‘Shotgun Garey’ in Uni.  Both barrels, eh?”  A smirk played across her face as she tapped her cigarettes against the lip of the ashtray.
There was a moment of silence as the assorted women tried to come up with ways to respond.  Luke used this time to think about how the ashes in his lap now formed a thin sheet over his body.  Eventually, Ma spoke up.
“Hey, what do I do with this once it’s out?”  She asked, tapping her e-cig experimentally.
“Toss it in the bowl.”  Gammy Hildy spoke with a smile, miming throwing her cigar into Luke’s body.
Ma followed her instruction, gasping as the e-cig turned to ash as it passed the lip of the bowl.  It didn’t even need to touch the small pile of ash at the bottom, dissolving into a pile of dusty black carbon, a few glimmers of metal mixed with the ash.
“Oh my God, that is so cool!”  Jill gasped, quickly spitting her gum into her palm.  Before anyone could ask whaat she was doing, much less stop her, she placed the gum upon his head.
A moment passed before she turned to Gammy Hildy.  “Why isn’t it ash now?”
The elederly woman gave her a kind smile.  “Sweetie, that effect is only for cigarettes.  Your gum is just gum—unless you’d rather it turn to ash, of course.”
Jill mulled it over for a moment, considering her options.  “Actually, I kind of like it this way.”  Luke winced inwardly as she pressed the gum deeper into his hair.  “See, it looks like he has pink hair now.”
An uproar of laughter accompanied her innocent statement, and everyone fell back to the
Luke wondered how the night could get worse.  On cue, the front door opened and Maria and Karli walked in.  Maria did a double take once she saw the family’s new ashtray, her piercings jingling slightly as she moved.  “Um.  Is that Luke?”  She asked, pointing at the figurine.
“Yep!”  Jill nodded, chewing a new piece of gum happily.
Gammy Hildy waved the pair in.  “It’s a lesson to teach him not to smoke.  Come on, join the fun!”
Karli started bouncing on her heels with excitement.  “Oh my God, can I?”  She looked to her mother, who nodded.
“If your Gam-gam can keep you from getting sick or addicted.”  Aunt Maddie passed Gammy Hildy a pack of cigarettes.  The elderly woman ran a hand along it, muttering an incantation.  She then tossed Karli the pack, and the girl pulled out a cigarette expectantly.
“Does anyone have a light?”  She tapped its tip with a finger.
“Sure.”  Maria leaned down to her cousin, snapping her fingers.  A thin jolt of electricity crackled between her thumb and index finger, and after a moment it sparked the cigarette to life.
“Thanks!”  Karli nodded, puffing away happily.
Maria smiled, waving her hand to dispel the leftover crackles of charge between her rings.  She looked up, seeing everyone save Luke was looking at her expectantly.
“Oh, I don’t smoke.”  The punk rocker held up a hand, and Luke felt wellsprings of gratitude towards his older cousin’s mercy.  “On the other hand, if Karli wants to light up, I’ll have to make sure she’s disposing of the ashes correctly.”  The fountains dried up as quickly as they’d formed; he’d found no real ally in her.
Aunt Garey grinned.  “You should show her how to make ash angels!”
Maria nodded, a smile on her face.  Luke wondered if anyone else could her muttering something about ‘ash angels’ and ‘sad childhood’ under her breath.  Evidently not, as the aunts were busy immersing themselves with complaints as to why their husbands didn’t show up, followed by stories of their excuses.
Strangely enough, all of them revolved around Gammy Hildy.  Luke wondered how none of them were able to come up with a single reason as to why the men didn’t want to see their mother-in law.
“Oh my God, he’s got a little rose where his dick should be!”  Maria laughed, pulling out her hairpins.  She handed one to Karli, showing her how to trace small designs in the ashes.
The older women laughed heartily at that, and even Jill joined in after a moment.  She walked up to Karli, pulling a bit of gum from her mouth.  She kneaded the pink food into a small halo, topping Maria and Karli’s first angel.
The conversation continued for some time, and the pile of ashes continued to grow in Luke’s bowl—much to Karli’s amusement.  Jill joined her in making patterns in the ash, using Maria’s hairpins to further detail their creations.
After what seemed like hours, the aunts finally ran out of things to talk about for the night.  Maria idled with her phone, taking pictures of Jill and Karli, the pair of younger girls having fallen asleep a long ago.
Ma yawned, stretching her arms.  “Well, this last e-cig’s out, so I should be off to sleep.”  She gently picked up her daughter.  “And Jill’s already out.”
Aunt Maddie nodded, muttering something incoherent.  Aunt Garey sighed, pulling her sister off the couch.
“Come on, off to bed with you.”  She angled her head to her daughter.  “Maria, you mind picking up Karli?”
Maria sighed, following after Ma.  “To the right, yeah?”  Ma nodded, waving her on.
Gammy Hildy was the last out of the room, groaning as her bones popped.  As she turned off the light, the elderly woman paused.  “I suppose it wouldn’t be fair to let you stay awake all night.”  She walked over to Luke and closed his eyes, and he felt his consciousness leave his body as he drifted off into a slumber.

When he opened his eyes, he was outside in the backyard, a pair of warm hands cradling him.  “So, you want me to set him down over here?”  His sister’s voice was loud behind him, and he gathered that she was the one carrying him.
“Yeah, turn him to face us, too.”  That was Ma’s voice.
The world whirled around Luke, and he was suddenly face-to-face with his sister.  The ground rushed up below him as she knelt; then she stepped aside to reveal both Ma and Gammy Hildy, a few paces apart from her.
“Well, time we get you back to normal.”  Gammy Hildy dusted her hands off on her smock before gingerly placing him on the ground.  Luke felt the bottom of the bowl press against the grass, eagerly awaiting when he could feel the greenery beneath his feet instead.
Gammy Hildy made a faint dismissive gesture with her hand, as though she was politely snubbing a beggar on the side of the road.  As her hand completed its motion, Luke felt his body begin to stir.  His extra ceramic additions cracked, crumpling away from his body.
For a moment, he felt a pang of alarm run through him.  He was worried that the loss of his ceramic ‘additions’ meant that he’d be losing some flesh, but it looked like the reversal spell was keeping his body intact.
His body stood naturally, growing back to its normal height within seconds.  Luke shook his head, clearing it of a momentary sense of dizziness.
His head tilted downward once more, the glaze dripping from his mouth like he was drooling.  He worked his jaw from side to side, now able to run his tongue along his teeth, glad that he was able to feel, even taste.
Though...  Luke coughed, a thick cloud of ash coming from his throat.  The boy doubled over, his hands and knees in the glaze.  He retched several times, emptying the contents of his stomach on the ground, a pile of dusty ash rushing from his throat, then a thin river of glaze.
After a minute of that, his stomach felt like it was empty, but at least his body felt better.
“Ugh.”  He grunted, wiping the side of his mouth.
A smile crept across he realized he touched his skin.  He twitched his toes, relishing how he could wiggle them in the grass, feeling the green blades between his digits.  Then, he realized he could feel something along his cock.
He looked down to find the rose melting off of his dick, finding the liquid was flowing over a much larger surface than he’d previously called his own.  He blinked, cupping his cock with one hand, a look of confusion across his features.
Ma sighed.  “Maria talked to us after everyone else went to bed.  She mentioned that you looked bored, and Jill helped agreed.  So... I’ll admit that I might have overacted a little in siccing Mom on you.”
Gammy Hildy joined in.  “Besides, your Aunt Garey would have probably just given you the cigarette anyways.”  She shrugged.  “I forgot she was such a heavy smoker.”
Well, that was a case of the pot calling the kettle black.  Still, Luke chose to hold his tongue.  They were being somewhat apologetic, and he’d hate to interrupt their good mood.  Instead, he coughed, a small shower of ashes cascading from his body.
“Jill?”  Ma looked a little behind Luke, and he turned to get hit full in the face with a jet of water.
Luke sputtered indignantly, holding up a hand to ward off the liquid.  He instantly regretted his decision, ashy water splashing onto his face before he could close his eyes.  “Agh, what the hell?”  He rubbed his eyes, quickly realizing that not all of the ash had been removed from his hand.
Jill laughed as he frantically scrubbed at his eyes.  “So I guess you’re gonna stop smoking?”
Luke honestly couldn’t think of a thing he would find less appealing.  “I’d say so.”  He nodded, picking at his hair.  “Also I’m not so big on gum anymore.”  He added as an afterthought.