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Belle watched Sophia and Roger ramble away while setting up the milking machine, but it was impossible to pay attention. Even when troublesome cow-related thoughts assaulted Belle against her will, she never lost her sense of self. She had been internally screaming each and every time her body and instincts overpowered her self-control. The thought of getting trapped as a cow while retaining a human enough brain to be upset about it sounded awful. She had to be friendly and keep her anger under control. How would she ever regain control of her life if she couldn’t?
“Does all of this make sense so far?” Sophia asked, tilting her head.
“Yeah,” blankly replied Belle. She wasn’t sure how she could feel anything but disgust toward Sophia after reading that conversation she had had with Bret. It wasn’t even like they were fucking, or she didn’t think so. It was just the fact they were talking about Belle behind her back that really got to her. The boy she wanted back and the girl who was her bestie.
When it was finally her turn to do something, she stood near the cow and took a deep breath. Just-- just relax, okay? She delicately attached the device to the cow’s swollen udder while trying to stave off the torrent of negativity that washed over her. There was far too much on the line to wallow in frustration.
The cow let out a low moo as Belle turned the device on. Sophia and Roger spoke about something, but she had already tuned out anything they said that wasn’t related to performing a farm task. Her breasts throbbed slightly, followed by a similar sensation between her legs. In her hurry to stop thinking negatively, she accidentally grabbed onto something she shouldn’t have. How would it feel to be hooked up to a machine like this? She mused. It was just a normal, curious thought. Most people surely had random thoughts like that. She didn’t once forget what was at stake; being friendly and having less selfish thoughts was what would save her. The most important thing right now was to do her job well and with a focused mind.
Still, though. What kind of mooing was that supposed to be? Was the cow in pain? Or were those moans of relief as milk drained away from its swollen udder. She moved on to the next cow, hesitating before setting the milking device up again. The cow let out a low moo just as the previous one did, causing a shiver down Belle’s spine. Her body dampened, forcing her to brush sweat away from her forehead. They’re just dumb cows. They moo because they moo, she reasoned.
As she moved on to the next cow, her body trembled slightly. Her nipples chafed against her top, causing them to throb in protest. To make matters worse, she felt her jeans creak while a wedgie formed. She felt her cotton panties ride slightly into her ass crack and labia. No-- no, I’m having a good day. These changes aren’t going to progress-- they aren’t, she desperately pleaded. It was valid to some extent. Her symptoms were frustrating but not nearly as bad as they would have been a couple of days ago. Indeed this was some type of test. If she performed her job despite all the shit life had thrown at her today, that would show Hesat how serious she was about changing.
“I’m in control. I’m just fine-- nothing can stop me,” Belle whispered to herself, clenching her hands tightly. She stopped before the next cow, staring at the swollen pink sack hanging beneath it. Did the cows feel like she did when her breasts became engorged? She recalled how desperately she needed to have her tits drained at various points during her ordeal. She felt something strange as she continued to gaze forward. What was it? It only took her a moment to realize it was sympathy. She was sympathetic toward the cow since she knew how bad it could feel. And it wasn’t like a cow could milk herself.
Her tits ached and spasmed, writhing against the cotton. It seemed that her nipples had already slipped from the bra cups. “Ugh…” Belle winced, gritting her teeth. Ignore it. Don’t acknowledge it. Nothing’s there. She began to set the device up once more. Just as she was about to get the last teat hooked up, an inkling of curiosity took hold. She reached out and grabbed the teat, slowly massaging and pulling on it as a spritz of milk sprayed out. As the cow mooed, she couldn’t help but think they truly must be moos of joy and relief. Her breasts ache, begging for the same treatment as this cow. I’m better than that, Belle grunted, continuing with her work. This was an utterly awful situation. Whenever Belle interacted with a cow, she had to muster up enough willpower and resolve to avoid falling into depravity.
Belle wasn’t sure how she made it through the rest of the day. Spending time with Sophia after seeing that conversation felt like torture. She hadn’t reconciled her seething anger in any way, so it ate away at her psyche from the back of her mind. She was forced to ignore the loss of her relationship with Bret, Sophia’s betrayal, and her body’s goddamn hormonal urges. She had to be a good girl who worked diligently because her dad and a magic cow deity were forcing her to. On top of that, her internet career might be over. There was nothing to be happy about as she toiled away on the farm.
Still, though, she remained cordial and performed every task with diligence. She ignored the temptations of her body and stayed strong. By the time she got in the passenger seat of Sophia’s car, the sun was just starting to dip in the horizon, and she admittedly felt pretty proud of herself. So many terrible things had happened to her, but she got through this single day of work. That was an accomplishment in her eyes.
“You did a great job today!” Sophia beamed as she drove them off. “Did you enjoy any of the work today? I promise I won’t be upset if you say no.”
Belle’s spirits immediately sank when Sophia spoke. Her accomplishment felt hollow in the face of everything she had already suffered and lost. “I guess the sense of reward feels kind of nice. I’m going to rest for a little bit, okay?” She closed her eyes and reclined the seat back to a forty-five-degree angle.
Sophia pursed her lips, thinking for a moment before smiling and responding. “Yeah, that’s fine! You deserve a good rest.”
Belle was relieved to have silence. If she spoke to Sophia for more than a few seconds in a row, she might snap at her and make the car ride home incredibly awkward. Completely exhausted, Belle fell into a half-slumber state on the ride home. Visions made of jumbled memories and fears assaulted her in this state. While her dreams were vague and undefined, they stoked the embers of existential dread within her.
When they arrived home, she opened her eyes with a startled gasp upon feeling a hand on her shoulder.
“Hey, it’s time to head inside,” Sophia said gently.
Belle blinked, gathering her senses before nodding her head. “Yeah, okay,” she replied, getting out of the car as she dragged her exhausted body toward her apartment. Where was she supposed to begin when it came to processing her emotions for today?
Once inside, Belle shambled past Sophia, who was heading to the kitchen. Despite the long day, she didn’t have much appetite, so she planned on going to her room for complete isolation.
Sophia realized her friend was leaving and stuck her head out of the kitchen. “Hey! You should probably eat something after such a long day. Why don’t you let me cook for you? What do you want?”
Belle turned her head back. “Not really hungry. I’ll take care of myself, okay?” She replied with a twinge of frustration.
Sophia frowned before taking a sharp breath. “I know you’re probably tired and not feeling good, but food will help you feel better. I could make you some soup or something easy.”
Belle felt like gas was being thrown onto the fires of anger she had been working to extinguish all day. “How can I trust you to make food for me?” she suddenly asked, crossing her arms as she fully turned toward her supposed friend.
“What… What does that even mean?” Sophia asked with genuine confusion. Her eyes shifted to the corner before an expression of realization appeared. “Oh! I promise I won’t put any weird vegan or vegetarian stuff in your food. I learned it was bad to do when I tried to make you eat quorn.”
Belle winced. Yeah, that fungus protein had been gross, but that was not even close to the point she was trying to make. “How do I know you won’t betray me? Maybe you’ll poison it to get rid of me. Or, maybe you’ll pack it with that calorie powder they feed starving people, so I get all fat and ugly.” She knew she was being at least somewhat irrational, but she couldn’t stop her impassioned words.
By this point, Sophia looked mortified. “If this is you trying to joke, it’s just making me feel uncomfortable, so you should probably stop,” she said in a low voice, tightly gripping her wrist. “Why would I do something like that?”
“Oh?” Belle took a couple of steps toward Sophia. A voice in her head suggested she try to control her anger, but that wasn’t the kind of person Belle naturally was. “So. Can you tell me that you would never do anything behind my back? That you would never betray me. I want you to look me in the eye and say you would never stab me in the back.” Her words dripped with unmistakable venom.
Sophia now understood that Belle was completely serious and wasn’t joking around. Seeing her friend talk and behave this way was upsetting. She took a step back, feeling a budding fear within her. “What? No-- I would never betray you!” She didn’t think she would, at least.
Belle was tired of beating around the bush. In her state of rage, she could ignore how loud her nethers and breasts yelled at her to get naked and touch them. The chafing had gotten pretty bad by now. “Okay. So you’re saying you would never send overly friendly texts to the guy who just broke up with your best friend?”
Sophia went pale. “You-- looked through my phone? That’s--”
“You wouldn’t excitedly talk to him about meeting up to watch anime or whatever? You wouldn’t let him vent about how awful I am while the two of you talk about me like I’m a goddamn child? You both shit all over me; you AGREE with him and then plan to have lots of fun together. WHY THE FUCK would you do this to me!?” Belle yelled, her body trembling as her face turned red.
Sophia was genuinely frightened; she didn’t know what Belle might do. “Belle-- I didn’t betray you. We’re not dating or anything like that. We’ve been platonic friends who have similar anime interests for years. If you look back, there have been conversations where I have scolded him. Like when he didn’t tell you about his parents coming to meet you until the night before when he could have told you a week in advance.”
Belle listened to her empty words. “Even if you are friends, he just fucking broke up with me. You are more than happy to continue hanging out and shit-talking me with him despite the fact he broke my goddamn heart. You weren’t going to tell me any of this, were you? You could come home to me crying about the fucking break up and comfort me without knowing you just got back from cuddling with him on his couch and watching cartoons.”
Sophia’s expression snapped from frightened to angry in an instant. “I know I’m usually sweet and easy to walk all over, but I’m not going to just sit here and take this,” she insisted, starting to defend herself.
Belle was surprised and frustrated by this response. “What are you--”
“Let me talk!” Sophia shouted, meeting Belle’s gaze. “Look. You will always be a dear friend. I want to see you succeed. But, let’s be real here.” Her voice got lower. “You have been doing things that make you a shitty friend for a while now. You can be dismissive of others’ interests, make the conversation about yourself every time, and apparently steal from people at the market. Whenever we do something you want, which is quite often, I always show you interest and support. And, if I ever show the slightest hint of boredom or frustration, you get offended.”
Belle’s heart sank into her chest as she heard Sophia speak. Her words felt like a stinging slap to the cheek. “I--”
“I’m not finished,” Sophia continued, gaining more confidence. “When we went out the other day to do something I picked, you were on your phone the whole time. You only cared about finding ways to use our outing to your advantage. So, when Bret broke up with you, I talked to him about it. You’re part of both our lives. We are both frustrated for similar reasons, and it’s nice to talk to someone who understands what you’re going through.”
Tears fell from Belle’s face. “You-- you’re making me out to be some kind of fucking monster. Why are you doing this?” Despite there being truth in Sophia’s words, she felt attacked. The fact that someone who was supposedly her bestie would betray her and then lay into her was the only thing she could focus on.
Sophia winced. “I’m not attacking you. I literally comforted you the other day when you were sobbing. I came with you to help with farm work and offer emotional support even though I never originally planned to spend my week this way. I drove you there and back and never even asked for gas money. I love you like a sister and want to see you improve. I’m trying to have a serious conversation, and your first instinct is to act like I’m being all cruel by attacking you. I want to support you and help you be a better version of yourself, so maybe you should consider why Bret left you instead of getting mad about how unfair it is.”
Belle couldn’t believe her ears. Sophia was the last person she expected to lay into her like this. “You--” She stammered, trying to find the right words. “If you had these issues with me, there is a better way to tell me!” She shouted, trying to find any type of leverage.
“Yo!” Daniela’s head suddenly popped out of her bedroom as she stepped out. “I hear yellin’ out here. What’s the situation? I want to be part of this,” she insisted.
Sophia took a slow breath. “Now isn’t the best ti--”
“Nonsense!” Daniela interrupted. “I was kind of lyin’ a second ago. I know the situation since I listened to the whole conversation. Since y’all are fighting, you need an impartial mediator or whatever.” Certainly, there was no way this could go wrong.
CHAPTER END
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