“Chief! Got a minute?”

Editor-in-chief for the Independent Morning Herald John Neville stopped, his finger hovering over the elevator button before reluctantly dropping to his side in defeat.. Not because he wanted to politely wait before she arrived, but because it was better to face her out in the open than get stuck in an elevator with her.

“What is it, Jenny? Is it important?” He asked, wearing his weariness on his sleeve as if it made any difference to the energetic young woman marching at her with her usual gleam in her eye and self-satisfied smile on her face. Her curvy hips swayed in their pencil skirt, drawing the eye of any man still in the office out of her field of view as she sauntered up to her employer. She gave a cute, practiced smile that sparkled on her beautiful face, enhanced by spending at least an hour in front of a mirror in the morning.

“Oh, nothing important.” She lied. Everything was important to Jenny Ming, self-described up and coming reporter at the humble newspaper, whether it was a political scandal or somebody forgetting to change the filter on the coffee machine. “I just needed your ear for a moment. You aren’t doing anything tonight anyway, right?”

“Actually, I was just on my way to a nice restaurant that my wife and I booked a month ago, so it had better be a minute, Jenny.” Neville said, scratching his bald scalp and wishing he had still had hair to run his hands through.

“I’ll cut right to the chase then.” Jenny declared, leaning against the wall and carefully covering the elevator buttons. She brushed a manicured finger through her short, straight hair, but Neville was fifteen years too old and too happily married to be charmed by an opportunistic young beauty or her push-up bra, which she hardly needed, he might add. “I was wondering what you thought of my recent pieces. You know, how I exposed that corrupt council member? And covered that controversy at St Patrick’s High?”

“They were solid articles, I’ll give you that.” Neville nodded patiently, keeping his tone calm and level. “And?”



“The thing is, I’ve found that I shine the brightest when I’m covering, you know, high-profile cases. But instead you’ve been sticking me on what’s practically gossip columns and car crashes.” Jenny sighed dramatically. “Don’t you have anything a little juicier for me?”

“Incident reports are a staple of our newspaper, Miss. Ming.” Neville said, averting his gaze as Jenny crossed her arms, her blouse and jacket perfectly ironed to a standard that nobody else in the sloppily dressed office bothered to meet. It was easy for him to pretend that he didn’t see her pout when she was a head shorter than him, the curvy Asian woman’s attempts to puff herself up with high heels hardly helping.

“I’m a journalist, chief.” Jenny stressed the word. “What’s the point in sitting around waiting for the news to come to me? Any intern could do that.”

“You’re getting paid for it, aren’t you? And stop calling me chief, you only call me that when you want something from me. Every other time it’s “Mr. Neville”, or “John”.” He checked his watch, hoping his wife wouldn’t pay him out for this.

“But don’t you think it’s a waste of my talents?” She suggested.

Talents? Neville scoffed internally. Jenny might think that she had a silver tongue, but she was more transparent than a sheet of glass if you could see past the airheaded lady-reporter act she put on on the field, and relied mostly on her looks to distract whoever she was interviewing, bystanders and eyewitnesses just happy to have a pretty woman act like she actually cared what they had to say, while interviewees dug themselves into holes thinking they could earn her favour. They were always left high and dry in the end, and he was certain that it wouldn’t be long before Jenny built up a reputation for herself that didn’t quite pan out the way she wanted.

Still, Jenny was ambitious, and it would be foolish to not address the fact that she felt she was too big for this little office. Neville stared her straight in the eye, which as most men around the office knew, took remarkable willpower and faithfulness to one’s wife. “You know what, Jenny? I’ll admit it, you aren’t the average journalist, just sitting around copying your homework. You got guts, and you got determination.”

Jenny’s self-satisfied smirk widened, as if she were a flower that bloomed under a stroked ego.

“You know what the only thing you’re missing is?” Neville continued, her smirk faltering slightly, then intensifying.

“A chance?” She suggested hopefully.

“A job where any of that matters.” He said flatly, and Jenny visibly deflated.  “For god’s sake Jenny, we’re just a local paper, we don’t even do print anymore! Find something that’ll get us those clicks instead of pretending you live in a TV show where big news is always just around the corner! Remember your alligator story? Our readers loved that, it was hilarious!”



“That was a serious exposé on illegal pet ownership.” Jenny pouted.

“Not when the thing that did him in was complaining to his pal about how his pet gators kept eating his underwear in front of a cop.” Neville chuckled, much to Jenny’s displeasure. His expression grew serious again. “Look, what do you think I’m even holding out on you over? You think scoops just grow on trees?”



“Not with that attitude they don’t.” Jenny moved into phase two of her plan. “Luckily for you, I’ve got something planned.”

“Can it wait? I really have to go.” Neville’s attempts to escape were blocked by Jenny refusing to budge.



“If you can just promise me that you’ll make some calls and get an interview for me at Innotech,  preferably not a spokesman, I’ll be happy to get out of your hair…” Jenny said with a flutter of her eyelashes.

“And why am I trying to get you a heart to heart with the biggest wig I can find at a pharmaceutical company?” Neville asked, obviously exasperated. “Can they get me some medicine for this headache I’ve got coming on?”



“Innotech is shadier than the cover on a lampshade, chief.” Jenny insisted. “You wouldn’t believe the dirt that’s going around on them. Smuggling, human experimentation, next-gen technology… and they have an office in our town! Don’t you think this is the perfect opportunity? I’m sure our readers would be dying more if we stirred up a little interest in the topic.”

“We don’t publish speculatory information, Miss Ming.” Neville said, although he was even more knowledgeable than her about how that particular company stunk more than a landfill. “That’s how you get sued for libel. And what, you think they’ll want an interview to clear things up?”



“And that’s when I’ll get the truth out of them! I’ve already got contacts inside giving me a few hints about what they might be up to.” Jenny looked very pleased with herself, and Neville could tell that she wasn’t going to let this one go.

“Listen Jenny, you’re young, so you think you’re invincible.” He explained sternly. “But if you just go messing around with people like that, it’s going to blow up in your face one day. Just focus on building up your portfolio and go find a more exciting company to work for if working here isn’t enough for you, okay?”



“At least promise me you’ll publish something if I find it. I have it on good authority that I’ll be getting a tip any day now.” Jenny insisted. Finally, Neville slumped over in defeat.

“If you have something concrete, I’ll look over it myself. Now can you move? My wife is going to kill me if I can’t beat the traffic.”

“You won’t regret it, chief!” Jenny beamed, finally letting him go. “Don’t worry, the news doesn’t come to me, I go to it!”

–

Seven hours later in the dead of night, not far from an Innotech warehouse, Jenny crept out from behind the bush she had been staking out from, brushing leaves off her jacket and placing her binoculars down in her purse next to her phone and any other items she was leaving behind. She stifled a yawn as she watched the lone security guard do his hourly patrol around the sides of the building, clearing the coast for her to make a beeline right in before he noticed.

“Alright news, come to mama.” She rubbed her hands together gleefully, this type of dubiously legal investigation stirring her sense of adventure. The scene was just right for Jenny’s glamourous view of herself: a shady corporation, tips from disloyal employees that they were hiding something dangerous and most certainly illegal, and the opportunity to sneak in like some kind of action movie heroine and make off with the evidence. It was too much for her to resist, and she was certain she could pull it off. She had staked it out for days  to prepare, and her contact had provided her with the location of what she needed to make the first bombshell scoop of her career, if only she could pull it off.

Slipping off her high heels, Jenny crept as quickly as she could into the unlit building, knowing that the security cameras they had there were currently just for show. She had caught wind of a plot to hold an illicit deal that neither side wanted on the books, potentially framed as a robbery with faulty cameras that hadn’t been checked in weeks to blame for the lack of evidence. Or so the story went. The details were a little vague, but the important part was that she could get in and out without being caught, but her window was slim. The only obstacle was the overweight security guard, a lazy-looking mall cop of a man who definitely seemed like he wasn’t being paid enough to care. Most of the time he seemed to stare at his phone from his seat, only occasionally making his required patrols. She was certain that as long as she kept quiet, she wouldn’t have to worry about him in the slightest.

Jenny’s eyes adjusted to the darkness as she weaved her way through the shelves, having studied a map of the layout plus what to look for, being neatly arranged rather than the maze of boxes and shelves she had half-expected. Her heart raced as she tried to find the correct box in time, trying to step as silently as she could as her eyes adjusted to the darkness enough to make out the logos in the dim night light, with the only light source being the scarce moonlight from outside coming through the door and the lightbulb in the security booth. Let’s see, Jenny thought to herself as her finger traced boxes of all shapes and sizes, she was looking for a red logo, come on red, where were you… There!

Jenny silently cheered as she found the box she was looking for, clearly marked and unmistakable. She looked around to make sure that the coast was clear and there was no guard about to sneak up behind her, then opened it up to reveal a number of carefully stored vials of clear fluid! This was it, the jackpot! It was her prize, her scoop, it was… whatever it was! She really didn’t know what was in these things, but she was gonna scoop one out, take it to somebody who knew their sciency stuff, and then once they analysed it, provide herself an “anonymous tip” to make sure she had the story ready to go as soon as she sent the information to the police, or something. Then she’d had a massive controversy to report on and credit herself as the mouthpiece of some mysterious whistleblower! It was brilliant, brilliant, brilliant! And if it was something totally innocent, well, she just wouldn’t mention the breaking and entering part and go find some other thing to build a career on. Now, all she had to do was-

Bang!

There was a sudden loud sound in the distance, jolting Jenny who was not ready at all and too preoccupied celebrating, causing the vial to fly directly upwards out of her hand. The vial hit the steel rung of the shelf directly above with a crash, shattering the flimsy tube and splashing the contents all over her chest. It took all of Jenny’s self control to not shriek at her blouse being doused, able to feel the unknown biohazard soaking through to her bare chest below, suddenly wishing she hadn’t worn something so low-necked today.



“Nononononono!” Jenny rattled out, barely containing her panic to a whisper as she foolishly patted the damp patch with her right hand before realising what a stupid idea that was, spreading the contamination to something that might touch her mouth if she wasn’t careful. Whatever she had just gotten on her was surely ultra dangerous, and as far as she knew, she had just infected herself with the first sample of a zombie superplague! She might be melting in a few moments, doomed to be the first live test of their mad science experiment! She was doomed, doomed! Oh, she should have just stuck to reporting road rage like her boss had told her!

Calm down Jenny, hold your horses, girl, her rational side said as it stepped in. Sure, there was like an eighty percent chance that she had gotten something totally deadly on her, but viruses probably didn’t come in liquid form, right? Maybe? She didn’t know that whatever it was spread by skin contact, right? Or if it did, maybe it wasn’t instant… no, wait, her skin was getting very tingly all of a sudden. Her hand too, it was definitely feeling funny, and it was definitely not her imagination. That was it, she was going to skedaddle on out of here and get to the nearest hospital, and pretend that she had just gotten something or other on her and was having an allergic reaction, and make up some excuse when it was totally something they didn’t recognise, and-



“Hey, who’s there? If it’s one of you kids again, I’m calling your parents this time!”



Jenny nearly jumped again when she heard the deep voice of the security guard echo in the distance, scurrying behind the largest box she could to hide from the beam of light that was just about to paint her shadow all over the walls behind her. She covered her mouth with her dry hand, trying to contain her heavy breathing and slow it down.

Thomas “Tommy” Lee, a security guard for Innotech and current bachelor in this late thirties, had been minding his own business returning from his short route around the warehouse to make sure nobody was vandalising it again, eager to get back to his cute dog video compilation before he had accidentally hit his toe on the doorframe. Thankfully his thick boots had absorbed most of the impact and saved him from a round of profuse swearing, but he had made quite the sound doing so, and in return had heard something break in the distance. After waiting a second to make sure he hadn’t imagined it, he had decided to investigate, always perfectly happy to actually do his job on the rare occasion he was called to action.

It was probably one of those damn kids with their baggy jeans and their hip hop music who kept spray painting the sides of the building in the dead of night, egged on by their friends to go in and make a mess of things as a test of courage, or perhaps just to have fun at the expense of him. Either way he was certain he had heard somebody move, and he wasn’t just going to let an intruder slide.

“I know you’re in there, come on out!” He called, waving his flashlight around, having only a vague idea of the direction it had come from. He had no idea that it was a diminutive young woman and not some gym rat hoodlum who was hiding from him, but Jenny’s brain assumed the worst inbetween worrying about the chemical she had gotten on herself. He knew, he had seen her, he knew exactly where she was! No he didn’t, she forced herself to assume, she was sure she had hidden in time. The fact that he kept moving the light away proved it. In fact, it looked like he was heading down the wrong aisle, and she’d get her chance to move, and… hey, how come she couldn’t move her fingers?

Jenny glanced down at her hand, realising that the fist she had been trying to clench didn’t seem to be happening. Her hand had totally frozen, held open no matter how much she commanded the fingers to flex, and her eyes widened, wondering if she had just paralysed her hand. She pushed it against the steel shelf to try to force them to move and it… bent? Her fingers bent backwards in an unnatural way, then sprung back to their straight-forward resting position as soon as she stopped pushing. It looked like she should have broken all of the bones in her fingers at that position, but instead it was like nothing had happened at all? And had that been a squeak she heard when she did it? Her hand seemed to have absorbed all of the liquid by now, and turned an unnatural pale pallor that if she wasn’t mistaken, was slowly spreading down her wrist, leaving her unable to bend her wrist once the colouration caught up.

Foolishly or not, Jenny grabbed her infected hand with her clean one, and instead of the stiffness she expected from a paralysed limb, her good hand sunk into it, as if her hand had turned to rubber. Not in the figurative sense, but in the literal sense, it was like she was grabbing something made out of latex, or plastic, or something like that! She squeezed her palm with morbid curiosity, her skin giving inwards as if it were hollow. It reminded her of a balloon or something, tougher of course, but that sort of malleability yet immediate return to form as soon as pressure was gone. And it was hard to tell in the poor light, but she could have sworn that it was slightly shiny like plastic too!

Almost hyperventilating from fear, Jenny touched the bare spot on her chest where she had been splashed, able to make out a  similar pale patch that, when touched, reacted similarly. She could push into it, but when her finger touched normal skin she had none of the same elasticity. To make matters worse, it was also spreading at an alarming rate, and Jenny had no plans to stick around and find out what would happen if it got any worse. She didn’t know what she had been infected with, but she could see now why it had been a secret! Jenny retreated towards the back of the warehouse, hoping to get around to the far side opposite him and thus be able to simply outrun him by virtue of distance even if he noticed her.

Unfortunately for Jenny, she underestimated how fast the infection was travelling, and her slow, cautious retreat soon backfired on her. The tingling had ceased but the plastic patch spread down to her left hip, causing her to awkwardly fall to her knee with a thud as she lost control of the left side of her body. By this point, Jenny could be best described as freaking out. Things had gone firmly sideways, and now her body was degrading at an alarming rate.

“Come on, move! Move!” She begged her body, able to stumble forward with one good leg and curiously enough, still bend at the knee where the pale patch hadn’t covered. SHe was able to shamble forward, her earlier zombie comparison starting to feel more accurate. The infection was spreading across her belly as well, threatening to consume both sides, and there was a strange pop over her navel as it too became rubber, her hand instinctively checking it to find that there was a strange lump there now, but she had no time to investigate further.

“There you are!” Tommy called, to make matters worse, hearing the sound she made and heading straight for it. He started jogging, but soon slowed to a walk himself, having not run more than twenty metres at a time in twenty years, assuring that he wasn’t going to burn off that jiggling gut or second chin any time soon, dooming his chances with the ladies even more than his schlubby appearance already did. It was more due to Jenny’s good fortune that she managed to stay out of his spotlight, darting through a gap in the containers and hide in the next row over.

However, she was further from her goal than ever, had lost her positional advantage, and her infection had spread to the shoulder, leaving her with one useless arm. It wobbled slightly from the motion of the rest of her body when she moved, bent at the elbow in an unhelpful L-shape, and curiously felt as light as air when she grabbed it in horror. It was like touching a beach ball, Jenny’s mind ended up turning to, as if her situation wasn’t surreal enough. It was like the substance was altering the very makeup of her body itself, in a way that totally transformed it into inanimate and possibly hollow plastic, but that couldn’t be possible, right? Even if it were nanomachines, that was super-science well beyond human capabilities… or so she thought. Well Jenny, you certainly got yourself a scoop, she thought bitterly. Hell, she was the scoop now, if she could make it out of this in one piece.

Jenny tried to turn to look over her shoulder, but the rubbery feeling had spread to half of her neck, and to her greater horror, her face. Her mouth was frozen on one side and she couldn’t even blink on the other, Jenny clutching her face in horror as it too squashed slightly inward. She looked down at her chest, finding it difficult to bend her torso as well, and it seemed that her breasts were transforming in an odd way. As far as she could tell through her blouse and jacket, her breasts were unusually perky, if not bulging outward in an almost perfect pair of spheres, as if she had gotten huge and particularly fake implants. She cupped them briefly, squeezing them and nearly letting out a gasp at how sensitive they were, but they were the last of her worries at this point. Her good hand was starting to turn too, and she was reduced to hopping on one leg, just barely remaining hidden from the inquisitive guard. Her leg was spread outward, and she had to push it inward to stop it from sticking out and giving her away.

Go away, just go away! Jenny begged silently as she realised there was hardly anywhere else to go, and he was turning the corner that would put him in the same aisle as her, where there was nowhere to run. God, it was like it was his job to not leave her alone or something! She looked over to the shelves, where there wasn’t enough space between the boxes to fit through, it being just a little too narrow for her. Unless…? Jenny grit her teeth, or at least tried to, as her mouth had since fallen victim to her transformation, and had been forced open in a wide O-shape. She inserted her transformed shoulder, then through to her chest, which squashed and flattened inward as she forced it between the gaps. She didn’t know how her body worked, but her guess had been right! In this balloon-like state, she could squeeze through this unnatural gap and escape! It had been a crazy guess that had suddenly occurred to her, but as she used what little remained of her moving body to push herself, it actually worked! With her bubble butt turned into globes that matched her breasts, Jenny almost flattened herself and sprung back into shape as she emerged on the other side.

She had done it! She had actually really done it! She mentally cheered, surprising herself at just how clever and competent she was even in such a time of adversity. It had only worked in this specific circumstance where her body had almost totally transformed too, if it had just been an arm she would have been out of luck. He was going to the total wrong direction now, and hadn’t spotted her at all! And now all she had to do was move, and… that’s right, move, and…

Jenny frowned, mentally at least, her face frozen stiff by now. All she had to do was pick herself up and move. Even with one leg she could still hobble, right? And with one arm even without a working hand she could drag herself, right? So why wasn’t it moving? Why wasn’t anything moving? Why? Why?



Jenny slumped over, falling to her side as her arms were both bent at the elbows and her legs were spread invitingly wide, never to move again in her current state. Her plastic face stood expressionless, her lips and eyes painted on along with her eyelashes and eyebrows. It didn’t look natural now, rather a semi-convincing imitation, quite masterfully made, but still obviously mere plastic. Her hair was merely a wig glued on, her nails literally painted, and her clothes merely a layer that failed to obfuscate her true purpose.

Hey! You! Help! I can’t move! Please! Jenny silently begged, her desire to escape completely evaporating now that escape was simply no longer an option. She was helpless, immobile, in urgent need of rescuing, and now the worry that she had escaped too successfully and he wouldn’t come across her was a real possibility. Jenny had to wait for five more agonising minutes before his flashlight finally flickered over her collapsed body, the human silhouette impossible to ignore.

“Aha! You’re…” Tommy said triumphantly, then trailed off when he realised just what he was looking at.

“Seriously?” Tommy groaned as he realized what he was looking at. “A sex doll? If this is your idea of a prank, I don’t get it! Oh, forget it, you’re probably gone by now…”

Tommy looked over Jenny, scratching his flabby chin. Her body shined under the gleam of his flashlight, unmistakable for a human under direct light. She was particularly fake-looking now as befit an obvious sex doll with her gaping painted lips that made her purpose unmistakable, although he was puzzled as to why she was wearing expensive-looking clothes. Must’ve been a fetish thing. Whoever paid this much for such a realistic sex doll was probably into that type of thing as well.

“Waaait, I get it.” He declared, chuckling as he spoke as if she were his audience to make it funnier to himself. “One of the boys in the labs ordered this thing on the company dime, then figured he could just sneak it out while I wasn’t looking. Then, he dropped it here and ran when I was about to find him. Yeah, that’d explain it. I knew I shoulda been a detective.”

No, you idiot! That’s not even a tiny bit close! Jenny seethed, suddenly wishing that she had just stayed put next to the broken vial to make it clear what had happened to her. Isn’t it obvious that I’m actually a human being transformed into an inanimate object by your company’s weird experiments? Moron!

“Up we go.” Tommy said as he picked her up, effortlessly lifting her into the air like she weighed barely a few kilograms even with her clothes on. Jenny was unsure whether she should take this as a good or a bad thing, but it was better than simply being abandoned. He was at least graceful enough to not simply drag her along the floor, Jenny instead feeling her big butt keep bouncing against her gut as he held her just barely under her breasts, and silently begged him to not hold her any lower.



Over there! Over there! She yelled mentally as he walked right past the place where she had had her accident, unable to do so much as quiver to show signs of life. If only there was a way to get his attention! Jenny wasn’t used to being ignored in the first place, and her total lack of control over the situation had her angry as much as she was humiliated as terrified. The two returned to Tommy’s security booth. She was placed on the ground as he planted himself down in his seat with a grunt, tugging at his belt while Jenny tried to formulate a plan.

Okay Jenny, this might work out, she said to herself while she watched him get cozy. He would surely have to report this to his superiors, who had probably tested that stuff and seen what it could do before. Then, as soon as they saw her, they would realise that something had gone wrong, and then they would change her back, right? Sure, they were a blatantly evil corporation that had no reason to do so, and it made more sense that they would dispose of a witness, but… maybe she could be the test subject for the changing-victims-back serum! EIther way, surely she would be sent to somebody who knew what was going on. All she had to do was wait it out and-

Jenny’s hopeful plans were interrupted by being yanked into the air again, starring into Tommy’s face as he examined her with an expression that she didn’t like at all. Then, he got hands on.



Aah~! Jenny gasped as he suddenly squeezed her breasts, cupping them in his palms. He placed her down in his lap, a horny grin on his face as he simulated a dream situation of a woman grinding on his lap while letting him play with her. Of course, she offered no feedback, but she soon made the uncomfortable realisation of just what was bulging through his pants, rubbing between her ass cheeks through her tight pencil skirt. She was immediately disgusted, yet strangely turned on despite her best intentions. For as much as she was begging for him to stop, there was another voice inside of her that simply asked for him to continue.

What the hell do you think you’re doing! Stop that! I’m not your toy to play with! Jenny raged, ignoring the heat within her and just how much better it felt to be groped now than it normally did. What do you think I am, some kind of actual sex doll-

Jenny’s internal complaints were cut off as she finally focused on her reflection, her image cast clearly against the window in the booth. Oh my god, was that her? That thing with the puffy lips, fake-looking breasts, and shiny, plastic skin? With painted eyes, molded skin, and a tantalisingly lewd set position for her arms and legs, her legs spread wide with no ambiguity as to what she was intended to be? It was morbidly lewd, realising that it was no coincidence that he treated her like a sex doll, albeit a very high quality one.



Change me back, just fix me, please! Jenny begged as he seemed to bore of the one-sided experience. There’s got to be something in these boxes that has an antidote! And if there isn’t, all you have to do is show me to your bosses and they’ll know what’s going on! Come on, there has to be some way to get you to hear me!

But there wasn’t, at least as far as she knew. Her desperate pleas began to change their tone as his perverted expression returned, and he lifted her up again, this time turning her around and starting to unbutton her jacket.

Hey, you had better not be doing what I think you’re doing! Quit it! I’m gonna press charges when I get out of this, I swear! Jenny moaned as her expensive, immaculately pressed jacket was carelessly tossed to the ground, followed by her blouse, leaving only her lacy bra.

Don’t you even think about doing it! I’m not your blow up doll, you freak! You’re messing with a real person! She threatened to no avail as that came off too, leaving her topless and at his mercy..

“Gotta respect the craftsmanship on these. Guess there’s a market for everything.” He mumbled, poking her realistic nipples as Jenny mentally bit her lip and tried to contain herself. His hands went to her skirt, his fingers tracing her pussy as Jenny mewled from the sensation alone.

“This is some real dutch wife shit. What’s the point in dressing it up if you’re just gonna take it off?” Tommy continued to say to himself, his habit of thinking aloud when nobody was around furthering Jenny’s sense of mortification. But just when he was about to start pulling her skirt down and peeling her panties off, he stopped. Jenny let out a heavy mental gasp of relief, laughing awkwardly. She guessed that even he wasn’t about to get it up in his booth of all places, and had just been curious. He’d probably put it back on before he left her in the booth to hand in tomorrow, right? It’s not like he’d want whoever ran the day shift to make any unfortunate assumptions about him, he would surely at least leave a note. But to continue Jenny’s string of misfortune,

“Let’s get you back to the car.”

What!? Jenny exclaimed, trying harder than ever to move, with as much success as ever. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait! You can’t be serious! I’m company property, you know! You said so yourself! You can’t just-

“Finders keepers, right?” He practically giggled as he left the booth, Jenny only able to splutter out silent protests as her optimistic plans were upended by the night of loving that was planned for her…