Despite sitting around a kotatsu with six of her friends, Momoko couldn’t help but feel like the primary source of heat in the room was Kuroko’s glare, although for once it was pointed at Sakura rather than Yui or herself, who returned it with a gentle, totally unbroken smile. Meanwhile Aoi began to silently perspire, Akari tugged her collar and loosened her uniform’s ribbon, Yui took the opportunity to direct her attention towards here phone, Hotaru seemed to be preoccupied and mumbling to herself as she tried to memorise the study cards Aoi had made for her, and Momoko preferred to remain perfectly still until she blended into the background.

“You told me this study session was going to be just the two of us.” Kuroko accused her, Akari shuffling awkwardly to distance herself from Kuroko and the spillage-zone of Hotaru’s boobs that kept obscuring her notes at the somewhat inadequately sized table.

“I told you that I was hoping to hold a study meet at my house and that I’d love to see you there. Everything else was your own conjecture.” Sakura continued to smile, Momoko downright impressed at how the girl who stammered when talking to people outside of her friend circle seemed to have unflinching composure in this scenario.

“I recall you saying that you hadn’t asked anybody else.” Kuroko leaned in.

“Correct. I hadn’t asked anybody else yet when I asked you.” Sakura also leaned in, her calm smile unbroken.

“But what about when you said that it might be a good chance to get closer?”

“Yes, closer with your teammates!”

“And learn a little more about each other?”

“Yes, like whether your weaknesses are in mathematics or history!”

“Uh, guys, can we like, actually study or whatever?” Hotaru complained as the two leaned over the table almost close enough to kiss. “My mom’s gonna kill me if I don’t pass my next test, and I missed out on the sale at the shoe store for this...”

“That’s right, think of poor Hotaru!” Aoi seized the opportunity to awkwardly leap in, pushing the two apart by hand.

“Yeah, that!” Momoko spluttered out after letting out the breath she had been holding for the entire conversation. “Study! I love studying! Let’s do more of it!”

“No need to strain yourself, Momo.” Yui snickered, adjusting her thick-rimmed glasses. “Let’s talk about something else. Akari, how’d your last date go?”

Usually an infallible plan to get Akari chattering without pause for at least five minutes, Akari’s expression instead darkened.

“Ryo and I aren’t dating anymore.”

“Huh? Why not?” Yui was surprised. “I thought you had a good thing going, landing the captain of the soccer team and all.”

“We were getting along quite well, right up until last week’s attack.” Akari lamented. “Remember that seahorse monster that changed people’s genders? Now instead of Ryo, star of the soccer club, she’s Ryoko, the soccer club’s manager that half the team is crushing on!”

“I thought you were still dating Hiroyuki?” Momoko said with some confusion, well behind the curve of Akari’s love life.

“Got hit by that giant watermelon monster, now he’s just Yuki and looks better in a bikini than I do.”

“Whatever happened to Hikaru?” Yui asked.

“Also turned into a girl by that painter monster that only wanted women as models that we fought, and currently she’s dating Yuki! He always did like girls with melons...”

Akari put her head in her hands then drooped over onto the table.

“And even if I liked girls, none of them were my type anyway!” Akari despaired. “I want a prince, not a princess! At this rate we’re gonna be an all-girls school!”

“I always wanted to go to an all-girls school…” Sakura said wistfully before the girls heard a knock on the door.

“Can I get you girls anything?” Sakura’s mother asked as she entered the room, still dressed in the uniform from the flower shop she ran. She resembled an older Sakura with a short bob-cut, and had a pleasant scent about her that reminded Momoko of Sakura after she was finished tending to the school’s garden. “Some tea, maybe?”

“I’d love some tea! I’m sure everybody else would too!” Momoko smiled, throwing up her hand enthusiastically. “Kuroko, how do you like your tea? Black, right?”

“You’re thinking of coffee, stupid!” Kuroko retorted indignantly. Sakura’s mother laughed, returning with green tea for all of the girls a few minutes later.

“I really think it’s time that you start getting along with everybody a little better, Kuroko.” Sakura chided her, Kuroko merely crossing her arms and scoffing at the concept.

“I don’t remember agreeing to make friends with anybody when I became a magical girl.” Kuroko said steadfastly. “Nor do I have any intention to. What’s the point? I bet most of you won’t be here in a year.”

“Kuroko!” Sakura protested.

“You know I’m not wrong, we already lost Hotaru.” Kuroko pointed out. “Yui looks like she works at a club and I’m shocked Akari can dodge anything in that dress. And might I remind everybody that we have the biggest butts of any team in history?”

“Maybe not including individual members.” Aoi mumbled as Yui remained sensitive over the fact that she had been voted best Kaleidoscope ass in an online poll recently.

“The point is, they got us all at once, and it could have been anything! We got lucky!” Kuroko continued to get worked up. “How long is this team gonna last before we start needing new members, huh? Aoi’s practically a grandma by magical girl standards and she’s been on at least three teams, I don’t know how she lasted this long!”

“Plenty of magical girls retire for personal reasons.” Aoi said as calmly as possible. “Not every retirement is due to a complete transformation.”

“It’s not like we can’t keep being friends after getting transformed!” Momoko entered the conversation, feeling slightly hurt. Why was Kuroko so eager to distance herself?

“Hotaru was the smartest girl I knew and now she’s the dumbest!” Kuroko got more intense by the moment. “That could happen to any one of you!”

“Hey, I’m, like, not that bad!” Hotaru complained, then giggled self-depreciatingly. “Okay, maybe I am. But I’m hot, so it’s okay, right? ‘Long as I’m happy and keep gettin’ to hang out with my girlfriends.”

“Maybe you’d be a little nicer if that monster got you instead of Hotaru.” Yui said, starting to get heated as well. “You think we don’t all know the risks? You’re not the one who has to prance around in a bunny costume, but I don’t complain about it because I like helping people! I’d probably wear something way more embarrassing if it meant I could keep going!”

“There’s no reason why you shouldn’t be friends just because something bad could happen.” Sakura said gently, unperturbed by Kuroko’s outburst.

“What’s the point in making friends with somebody who might be a completely different person tomorrow!? If it happened to you, I don’t know what I’d-” Kuroko cried out before catching herself, casting her eyes downward. She ran her hands through her hair a few times, avoiding eye contact with anybody in the room. Nobody seemed brave enough to talk, and Sakura opened and closed her mouth several times, looking lost and indecisive. It seemed like she had something she wanted to say, but couldn’t bring herself to say it, back to her usual shyness and reluctance to not retreat into the background.

“Your mom seems nice!” Momoko eventually offered, which didn’t help break the silence in the slightest. “She looks like she knows a lot about flowers!”

For better or worse, Hotaru took the bait.

“Yeah, ‘cause she’s a florist, dummy! Didn’t Sakura tell you?” Hotaru completely failed to read the room, but right now Momoko preferred some noise to the crushing silence.

“You know, I was thinking of asking Takeshi out on a date!” Akari awkwardly stumbled into the conversation. “You know, my senpai in the kendo club? Well, we’re in the same year now, but he was the one who got me into kendo, and he’s still better than me at it, which is great because I told all of the guys in the club at the start of the year that I wouldn’t go out with them if they couldn’t beat me in a fight, which was a bad idea because everybody but Takeshi lost to me so now it’s really awkward and they think I’m out of their league, so I had to go to the other clubs and-”

“I don’t really care.” Kuroko said flatly, still refusing to make eye contact as Akari lurched mid-romantic-ramble. She drank the last of her tea, calmly placing down the cup and getting to her feet. “I think I’ll just go home today-”

“Hey gals, wanna hear something interesting?” Yui looked up from her phone to speak casually. “According to Mokoto and her boyfriend, Tokyo’s being invaded by maids right now.”

“You sure they didn’t just make a wrong turn into the cafe you work at?” Kuroko laughed bitterly, sounding like she didn’t enjoy even her usual jabs.

“Nah, too many butlers around this time.” Yui took the hit in stride, keeping her disaffected tone of voice as she showed her phone to the others. “They were in Harajuku so they thought it just a weird fashion thing at first, but then they caught the train and the carriage was like, so much black and white you’d think they were at a funeral.”

“Invasion is the right word, that’s what the news is calling it. We had better get moving soon.” Aoi confirmed as she checked her phone, where she had it set up to aggregate a dozen news sources ranging from traditional reporting to social media sightings and rumours to a magical girl fan-group that reported anything that even looked like a monster. “All over the city people are being attacked by something and turning into maids if they’re women, butlers if they’re men. But it took a while for everybody to notice, because they aren’t panicking. They’re all heading somewhere.”

“Heading home for winter, maybe?” Akari joked.

“If they’re servants, they’ve gotta be, like, serving somebody, right? They’re probably all going to one place.” Hotaru pointed out. It was fairly obvious, but now that she wasn’t the Hotaru who could figure out where they were going in a heartbeat, managing to have common sense every now and then was the most they could expect from her.

“Wherever it is, they can’t be on the move forever.” Aoi said, helping Akari up. “Hopefully it should be as easy as following them to the source.”

“Hang on, shouldn’t we be going after the monster if they’re still running around?” Momoko pointed out.

“That’s the thing, it hasn’t been sighted in a while.” Aoi confirmed. “Maybe it filled some kind of quota, maybe it’s waiting for us, maybe it’s just taking a break. It didn’t seem to have any pattern, it was just changing people at random, probably trying to do as much damage before we show up.”

“Or maybe it

“Why don’t we just ask them?” Momoko suggested. “The maids, I mean! Let’s just ask them where they’re going!”

“Yeah, but aren’t they like, mind controlled?” Yui reminded her. “We might not get an answer.”

“It’s worth trying, right?” Momoko smiled.

“Momoko’s right, a potential lead is better than no lead.” Aoi agreed. “Let’s try to keep to one group today rather than split up. We might be slower, but a career change is hardly the worst thing a monster could do to the citizens of Tokyo. Don’t you think, Sakura?”

“Huh? Oh, well, I suppose so.” Sakura seemed to be jolted awake, having barely been following the conversation. She stood up, looking awkwardly over at the still silent dark-haired girl.

“Um, Kuroko, I…” She stammered, quickly losing momentum. “Never mind…”

“Let’s just get moving.” Kuroko said roughly, almost stomping out of the room ahead of them. Sakura slumped, looking disappointed more in her herself than anything. Yui scratched the back of her head in irritation.

“I get what Kuro’s saying, but she doesn’t have to say it like that!” Yui scowled. “I don’t know how I’m supposed to deal with that girl!”

“I’m sorry everybody, I had something I should have said, but I couldn’t…” Sakura seemed torn up. “I wish I had more confidence…”

“Yeah, well, I’m sure you’ll both get over it.” Yui slapped her on the back in an attempt to shock her out of her funk. “Besides, you’re the only one who knows how to get to her, I’m sure you’ll figure it out.”

“So what do I do?” Hotaru asked cluelessly, still under the kotatsu.

“You keep studying so you don’t fail that test.” Aoi patted her on the head. “Tell Sakura’s mom we’ll be back later.”

“You know, maybe I could come out of retirement just for a little bit-” Hotaru said hopefully, only to be ignored as the group funnelled out to leave her alone with her green tea.

“Great, now I can’t get Aoi to do this stuff for me.” Hotaru grumbled. “Why’ve I gotta study all the time when I’m just gonna be a model anyway? Stupid Aoi...”

--

“It looks like that’s their destination.” Aoi pointed at the enormous mansion that the legions of maids and butlers were converging on, an unnaturally gigantic property that eschewed the space restrictions of the expensive and crammed Tokyo with its enormous yard, hedges, and what even appeared to be a pool before one even got to the mansion itself.

Tracking the maids had been a simple enough affair. While each one that they tried to interrogate seemed well out of it, each only responding blankly that they needed to hurry up and serve their mistress, they made no effort to prevent the girls from following them, and so it hadn’t been long before they simply let some of the stragglers lead them to the mansion. The group had worried about sudden attacks either on them or other citizens, but there seemed to be no further reports of monster attacks.

“I’m not sure if I feel rich enough to go in there.” Yui said, mouth agape at the sheer show of wealth and excess.

“It’s a bit… much, isn’t it?” Sakura agreed, intimidated by the size of the place compared to her small suburban home. “I don’t think I could live there.”

“Wouldn’t you get lost in a place like that?” Akari laughed nervously, although she did feel that it would be pretty romantic to return from her wedding to a place like this and be treated like a princess. She cleared her throat and approached the gate, which had opened automatically to let the servants in, but showed no response for them.

“Okay, that’s enough gawking!” Akari declared. “Let’s go in there and see if we can find our monster!”

“Don’t worry, I’ve got a plan!” Momoko declared, her eyes glittering with excitement. “First, we go buy some maid uniforms. Then, we blend in with the maids so they let us in and find out what the monster’s plan is. And once they do, we transform and take them by surprise, so they go “So it was you all along!”, and then we beat them up and save the day!”

The others stared at Momoko.

“Or we just transform and jump the fence.” Akari pointed out the obvious.

“That’s no fun at all!” Momoko whined as she was dragged off into a private corner to transform, pouting as the group swiftly jumped into the property and were soon cautiously making their way through the front door. The house was filled to the brim with servants sweeping here, dusting there, wiping down this and that, and some carrying platters of expensive food and wine to an unknown destination. It wasn’t long before they heard a loud voice echoing down the hallways, tinged with a french accent.

“You there! Work harder! I don’t want to see a speck of dust anywhere the mistress might see it, or where I might see it for that matter! Incompetent servants will be replaced! This is why none of you are being paid! You should be honoured to work for our mistress for free!”

“That was easy.” Yui commented. “What’s this about a mistress though?”

“Those servants are going the other way.” Aoi noticed as the food and drink were carried off the opposite direction of the voice.

“The mistress must be the monster, right?” Kuroko guessed, finally speaking up for the first time since leaving Sakura’s house. Despite her moodiness, she was cooperative and usually ignored spats with the group when it came down to business. “That could just be the head maid.”

“What if the one we heard is the monster, and the mistress is the big boss?” Momoko suggested, both excited and scared at the idea. She had yet to see her greatest foe in person, or any of their generals, but knew that it had to happen eventually. Why not today? However, Aoi shook her head.

“They don’t work like that.” Aoi explained. “I’ve only met them once personally, but my old teammates told me that when they do show themselves, there’s no running or hiding. The same with the generals; they make themselves known immediately.”

“Should we split up?” Akari asked, having to hold back her long dress from spilling around the corner as the various servants completely ignored the colourful group, preferring to mindlessly go about their duties. “If one of us gets the wrong one, we can just double back and regroup.

“It can’t hurt.” Aoi decided. “It might get too cramped if we all try to attack head-on in one of these hallways too. Momoko, Sakura, you’re with me.”

The group split down the middle, Kuroko, Akari, and Yui scurrying off to find the head maid while the rest followed the stream of servitude to its source.

“You know, I almost wish we all got hit at once with something like this. We don’t match Kuro at all anymore.” Yui commented, her butt jiggling while her breasts bounced in their cups and her long ears flopped up and down. “At least then we’d be consistent, you know?”

“I’d prefer not to run around in a leotard personally. No offense. The ears and tail are pretty cute though, I’d live with those.” Akari admitted, holding up her skirts with her hands. “I’d die for the chance to see you all in wedding dresses though. Then again, it’d be impossible to stand near each other in a place like this, and we’d need three times as much space just to stand in a line!”

“Kuro, what do you think?” Yui asked playfully. “Bunny or bride?”

“How about neither?” Kuroko shot back, unamused by the mental image. “I’m quite happy to be the normal one of us.”

“Aw, don’t be like that.” Yui teased. “Maybe you’ll get turned into a maid today, and then you can work at my cafe!”

“Don’t say that, Yui.” Akari said in a faux-serious voice. “It could turn her into a butler instead, after all!”

“I’d rather die first.” Kuroko curled her lip in distaste, then softened a little. “Although I do agree that if we had to, I’d prefer we had a consistent theme. Then at least I wouldn’t feel out of place whenever I finally get changed.”

“And here I thought you’d be a purist.” Yui smiled.

“Don’t get me wrong, it’s just that it’s got to happen someday.” Kuroko clarified insistently. “I don’t know how Aoi’s lasted this long, or how she doesn’t worry about it. If it were me, I’d…”

Kuroko seemed like she was going to say more, but their conversation was cut short by turning a corner and coming face to face with their target.

“Another incompetent one!” The head maid said, snarling as it lifted a mind controlled maid into the air by her collar, showing her superhuman strength right away as the violent act seemed to snap the maid out of her trance. She dropped her broom, tears forming in her eyes as she realised she was face to face with a genuine monster who continued to yell at her. “Worthless, every one of you! None of you meet the standards required by our mistress! I should dispose of you all and start over!”

The monster towered over the maid in terms of height, over two and a half metres and enough to stand out in any mob of darkly coloured servants. While most of her body was covered by a bulky traditional maid outfit, her skin was a shiny pure black resembling polished marble and hair tied into a tight bun that looked like solid rock, with ivory-white teeth when she snarled. Her appearance was otherwise plain, save for the gigantic vacuum cleaner she was lugging around, large enough to carry a person, and likely the source of her power.

She turned to see the three magical girls, throwing the maid to the ground. The poor maid struggled back to her feet as quickly as possible before making a run for it, cowering behind the magical girls.

“Hurry up and get out of here already!” Kuroko said to the terrified girl, who nodded obediently and ran away as fast as she could, putting Kuroko in a bad mood as she took point, approaching the monster herself, Akari materialising her bouquet while Akari decided her weapon, an embarrassingly oversized carrot used for bludgeoning, might prove impractical to swing in the relatively tight corridor.

“Though you have no appointment, I’ve been expecting you. Just more trash for me to dispose of before the mistress even knows you’re here!” The monster threatened with a mocking half-bow. “Luckily, a good maid as a plan for any filth that covers her mistress’s abode!”

The maid monster pointed its oversized vacuum cleaner at them, starting to suck them in with the force of a hurricane that began to tear expensive furnishings off the walls, candlesticks, paintings, even a chandelier looked like it was about to be torn off the ceiling as the girls desperately clung to the nearest solid object. Akari managed to wrap her arms around a pillar as her bouquet was sucked in, coming out the other end as a rose-themed feather duster. Aoi managed to hide around a corner, ready to dig her fingers into the expensive plaster wall if the suction got any more intense, but poor Kuroko was caught out dead centre in the middle of the room with nothing to hold onto for safety, her impatience to attack the monster proving to be her downfall..

“Wait, hang on!” Kuroko cried as she began to be pulled towards the monster, her eyes widening in panic. “Help! Somebody-”

Kuroko shrieked as she was lifted off her feet and pulled directly into the vacuum cleaner, her cries being silenced as her form could be seen travelling down the large hose into the machine itself. There was silence for a moment as the vacuum shut down, the two looking on in horror as Kuroko was spat out the other end, landing on the ground in a heap. The two watched as she slowly pulled herself to her feet.

It didn’t take long to notice the changes to her. Her short skirt had grown out, now a flowing dress that reached her ankles before providing just a hint of her long white stockings and cute black mary-jane shoes replacing her boots and bare legs. She had long sleeves with puffy shoulders, white cuffs at the end, while she had a long white frilly apron making up for her predominantly black uniform. Her dress had a high white collar unlike Yui’s cosplay-maid uniform that gave her a look of elegance, and she was topped off with the traditional maid headdress.

“I really hate making a mess, you know.” The monster chided the dazed and confused Kuroko, who stood there with a glazed-over look. “You’ll have to be the one who cleans it up before the mistress sees!”

“Yes, ma’am.” Kuroko said dully, picking up the nearby rose feather duster and beginning to dust down a nearby pot, lucky enough to survive the localised whirlwind thanks to being directly behind the monster. After a few seconds of working she paused, seeming to snap out of her daze. She looked down at herself, tugged at her skirt and her apron for a bit, felt her frilly headdress, then let out an extremely embarrassed girly scream.

“W-w-w-what did you do to me!?” She screamed at the monster, who seemed unamused.by her indignance. “Get me out of this ridiculous outfit right now, or I’ll-”

“Silence!” The snooty maid yelled back at her, Kuroko uncharacteristically instantly shutting up. “Maids are to be seen, not heard! I’ll not have you talking back to me unless I ask you to speak, do you understand?”

“Yes ma’am.” Kuroko said demurely, casting her eyes downward.

“Good, now wait here until I instruct you otherwise.” The maid said. “I have to deal with your rude little friends first!”

“Hey, Kuro!” Yui called over the deafening sound of the vacuum cleaner. “You aren’t seriously going to listen to that thing, are you? Help us out already!”

“But…” Kuroko called back submissively. “I can’t! She told me not to!”

“What kind of logic is that!?” Yui called back in disbelief.

“I just can’t!” Kuroko said helplessly, wondering why she was listening to it in the first place herself. She had just said it so… forcefully! Authoritatively! What was she supposed to do against somebody like that? It was easier to just listen to them and do what they want…

Kuroko grit her teeth, suddenly disgusted with herself. What the hell was she thinking? Why should she listen to her just because she acted like she owned the place? She was better than that! She threw down her feather duster and grabbed the pot, smashing it over the vacuum cleaner and causing the tank to crack. She followed up by stomping on the hose and cutting off the suction, the machine quickly overloading and exploding into a cloud of dust and debris that left them all coughing.

“Do you have any idea how expensive that was!?” The monster yelled at her once the cloud parted, totally ignoring the destruction she herself had caused. “You’re going to be paying that off for the rest of your life! What would the mistress say if she saw this mess?”

“Who cares? And that didn’t belong to you in the first place, idiot!” Kuroko yelled, conjuring up her reliable staff, which as she predicted, materialised as a long black broom instead. Her lips curled in distaste, but she didn’t hesitate to spin it around to brandish like a weapon.

“How dare you disobey my orders!?” The monster yelled at Kuroko as she swung her broom as deftly as she had when it was a simple staff, managing to land blows past the monster’s defences as clouds of dust erupted every time the bristles made contact as well.

“Like anybody would listen to you with lines like that! You’re a failure of a maid, letting the room and my dress become so dirty!” Kuroko said confidently, finding that the monster had no dignity or authority when she simply laughed at it. Well, maybe she still felt a little bit of a tug when it yelled at her to stop, but it was easy enough to ignore.

“Hey! What’re you just standing around for?” She yelled at her teammates, still taking cover in the wake of the machine’s destruction. “Help me clean this up!”

The bunnygirl and bride looked at each other for a second before charging in, the trio of mismatched magical girls having little to fear as they hoped the other three were doing well...

--

“Looks like this is it.” Aoi said as they reached what looked like the main bedroom, a constant stream of maids and butlers filtering in and out.

“Should we go back for the others?” Sakura asked.

“Let’s confirm it first.” Aoi decided.

“Ah, so it’s you.” An aristocratic voice said from the end of the room where the room’s usual four poster bed was replaced with a literal throne. The monster was being served a veritable banquet by its servants, only pausing to address the intruders. “I knew that I could smell something common.”

“I don’t think I’m a fan of this thing’s attitude.” Momoko commented, sensing an irritating fight ahead.

The monster was as queenly as it sounded, wearing an oversized golden old-fashioned dress that seemed a hundred years out of fashion and was pushed outwards by a bust that offered voluminous cleavage, an enormous ruby resting within. The woman was covered in enough jewellery to pin a man to the ground, every other part of her body coated in comically oversized gems. Even her face seemed to glitter, and it soon became apparent that she didn’t have some sort of odd tan, and instead was literally gold from head to toe, what they had assumed were sleeves actually being her bare golden arms encrusted with gems and covered with expensive bangles and rings on top of that. Her and the dress may have in fact between one and the same and its crown seemed fused to its pointy drill-shaped curly hair, and the metallic monster flexed unnaturally as she stood up from her throne.

“Goodness, where is that useless maid of mine?” She said irritably, looking loathe to actually fight the girls herself. “Useless as always. I specifically told her that I’d have her head if I had to do this myself! It’s impossible to get good help these days, I swear.”

“Don’t talk to it, we’ll be here all day.” Aoi muttered to Momoko, the monster not noticing as it was caught up in its own tirade.

“And you!” It pointed at the three. “Ruining the décor with your garish colours! You aren’t even fit to scrub the toilets in my manor!”

“You mean the manor you stole!” Momoko couldn’t help herself, and the monster looked extremely offended.

“Stole? Stole!?” It huffed. “Everything in this city, no, the world, is my birthright! Although I suppose commoners like you wouldn’t understand! The fools who foolishly protested my presence are currently on cleaning duty where they belong!”

It clapped its hands, the various maids and butlers fanning out of the room. The three tensed up, ready to fight.

“I suppose I’ll have to teach you a lesson in class myself!” It proclaimed, the three girls leaping into action as soon as the transformed victims were clear. Momoko entered the fight with a kick, knocking the monster back before following up with a second, then squealed as her attack hit one of its large gems instead of its softer metal body, hurting her as much as it hurt the monster.

“Bad idea! Bad idea!” Momoko moaned as she clutched her foot, Aoi and Sakura materialising their weapons in response. Aoi produced a traditional, rather old-fashioned for a modern magical girl rod, a half-step between Kuroko’s staff and Momoko’s wand, while Sakura preferred a long-range whip that allowed her to lash out at the monster from a relatively safe distance.

“Pathetic! Such low-class attacks!” The monster laughed haughtily as Sakura’s whip had little effect on its hardened gold skin, Aoi doing minimal damage with magic blasts launched from her rod bounced off of its gems.

“I think I made a dent in it before! Just try to avoid the jewellery!” Momoko noticed once the aching in her foot died down, Aoi nodding and ceasing her ranged attacks, while Sakura, not the type for close combat if she could avoid it, preferred to keep attempting her whip’s attacks. If Momoko hurt herself trying to hit it, she likely wouldn’t do any better.

“Should we go get the others?” Sakura asked. “The others seem like they might be well-suited for-”

Sakura was cut off by a mighty crash and the sound of harsh winds as the others began fighting the maid monster.

“There’s two of you!?” Momoko exclaimed, this being the first time she had fought a duo.

“Of course there is.” The queenly monster said matter-of-factly. “You couldn’t possibly expect me to go out there and work, could you? And besides, why should I? The world already belongs to me, they should just hurry up and realise it! In the meantime, I put my servant to good use making some underlings!”

“So they needed two of you because you’re too lazy to actually do anything yourself.” Aoi ignored her own advice and scoffed at the monster. “No wonder its attacks were so inefficient, it was just following your instructions!”

“Such low education! I knew you wouldn’t understand.” The monster sighed. “I couldn’t possibly share my gift with the world in the first place! Humanity is only good for servitude!”

Aoi and Momoko closed in, carefully targeting the gaps in the encrusted jewels while the monster clumsily swiped at them, slow, large slaps that were simple enough to avoid for the trained magical girls. Starting to look more dented than a beaten up old car, for all the monster’s big talk it seemed to rapidly run out of steam.

“All of you, buzzing around like horseflies!” It screeched, suddenly snatching Sakura’s largely ineffectual whip out of the air and looking straight at her. “And you, you’re not even as good as your crude little friends! A housefly, that’s what you are! But you’ll have to do!”

She yanked the whip, sending Sakura flying towards her as its largest diamond began to glow, Sakura realising it and letting go of her whip, but it was too late. She was in mid-air and helpless when she was blasted, flying back and to the ground.

“I’m loathe to promote any of you cretins to nobility, but it seems I had no choice!” The monster laughed. “Finally, at least one of you will see things from my perspective!”

“Sakura! Are you okay?” Momoko abandoned her assault and rushed over to the gently glowing Sakura, able to see her change first-hand for once. Sakura’s green braids fell loose, then began to rapidly spin and curl themselves into a pair of thick ringlets that fell down to her chest in length. She gained a light layer of lip gloss and green eyeshadow that made her look a little more refined than before, and her fairly plain uniform gained a number of extra frills while her gloves lengthened up to her biceps. A large emerald sprouted on her chest, but other than that she seemed surprisingly unscathed.

“Sakura?” Momoko asked as she helped her to her feet, Sakura surprisingly quiet.

“You…” Sakura said quietly, her head cast downward.

“Yes?” Momoko asked, filled with concern for her friend’s mental state. She looked fancier than before, but she couldn’t possibly betray them just like that, could she?

“You…” Sakura repeated a little louder than before, even Aoi starting to look concerned as Momoko let go of her hand. “You…!”

“How dare you change me with your filthy magic, you insolent fool!” Sakura thundered, screaming at the top of her voice as her new drill hair shook from the force, Momoko nearly losing her balance from the surprise. Sakura dashed in before Momoko could react, conjuring a new weapon without hesitation which took on the form of a large fan, Sakura seemingly not even caring what it was before she reached the shocked monster and began to slap it viciously with little regard for whether she hit a weak point or not.

“How dare you! How dare you!?” Sakura continued to yell as she let loose disproportionate anger that caused even Aoi to back off and give her space. “Fool! Cretin! Who gave you permission to even think you could try to change somebody like me!? A national treasure like myself?”

“W-what do you think you’re doing!?” The monster asked as her noble decor was totally ruined by how bent out of shape she was by this point.

“Isn’t it obvious?” Sakura asked in a surprisingly calm tone of voice as if she hadn’t just exploded like dynamite, although it was filled with scorn and thickly accented with posh overtones. “I’m educating a low-class person such as yourself!”

“L-l-low-class?” The monster gasped.

“Worthless servants? Doing none of the work yourself? How patently absurd!” Sakura began to lecture her, pausing to fan herself with her own weapon. “Why, I dare say that your maidservant must be putting up a much better fight than yourself right now! What kind of mistress is more incompetent than her servants? A worthless, low-class one with no more elegance than a beggar off the streets, I can see!”

“How dare you!?” The monster weakly protested. “I give you half as much elegance as myself and this is how you behave?”

“I’ve more elegance in my little toe than you’ve in your entire body!” Sakura chided her, continuing to fan herself as the monster seemed to have lost the will to fight back. “Declaring everything your own without working for it, absolving yourself of responsibility despite the privilege afforded to you… the very concept of noblesse oblige rejects you! You’re worse than the lowest commoner! Gutter trash, that’s what you are!”

“I won’t be hearing such slander!” The monster screeched, throwing a fist only for it to be easily deflected by Sakura’s fan.

“Unable to live up to your own lofty claims of grandeur, are we?” Sakura said mockingly. “How unbecoming of you!”

She slapped the monster around once more before turning back to her friends.

“Miss Aoi! Miss Momoko!” She called with a smug smile. “Shall I allow you to do the honours? I shan’t prefer to be the one to have all the fun, after all!”

“Uh, sure!” Momoko awkwardly called back, producing her wand and starting to charge it. Aoi appeared to be in a state of shock, but obediently raised her rod and gathered energy. The windup of each was slow and easy to interrupt, but the monster was in no condition to dodge, and was kicked onto her throne by Sakura to top it off.

“Sparkling Pink Heart Shower!”

“Ocean Blue Love Splash!”

“And that’ll teach you to mess with Kaleidoscope Emerald! Ohohohohoho!” Sakura began to laugh as haughtily as possible with her hand raised to her face as the monster exploded, taking its throne with it. Her obnoxious laugh continued well after the monster had faded, Momoko eventually having to be the one to interrupt and end it.

“Um, Sakura, are you feeling okay?” She asked, getting the feeling that she was dealing with a very different Sakura now.

“Why, never better, of course!” Sakura laughed, a permanently smug expression seemingly plastered on her face now as she casually brushed one of her drills back into place to restore her symmetry. “I’m feeling as lovely and elegant as ever!”

“Now, don’t take this personally, but…” Aoi awkwardly entered the conversation. “You seem, uh, a bit different now.”

“Well of course I do!” Sakura agreed. “I’ve bloomed, as you can see! A beautiful rose of nobility and refinement! Personally, I can’t possibly see how this might be a bad thing!”

“You sure you aren’t just saying that, because, you know?” Momoko attempted.

“My dear, sweet, innocent Momoko…” Sakura took her hand dramatically and looked deep into her eyes. “I’m well aware of what that crude excuse of a would-be queen has done, but I believe that one must make the most of their circumstances! Wouldn’t you agree?”

“Well, I do, but…”

“Then it’s settled!” Sakura smirked. “Now come! Our friends await our help! They shan’t stand a chance against the six of us! Ohohohoho!”

Sakura began to laugh again as Aoi looked emotionally drained and Momoko already felt exhausted…

--

“Well, that wasn’t too tough.” Yui panted as the three stood over the scorched carpet where the monster had been, Akari sinking to the ground as well. The maid had put up a tough fight, but with Kuroko’s help they had clutched it out. Currently she was busy sweeping up the remains of the pot she had broken, using the very broom she had used to beat the life out of the maid that had transformed her.

“Hey! Leave that to the army of actual maids out there!” Yui called exasperatedly.

“But it’s bothering me.” Kuroko pouted slightly. “Besides, you two are just getting yourselves dirty like that. Akari, you’re ruining that lovely white dress of yours! You’re lucky you don’t have to clean that!”

“Forget it! Now quit it, whoever lives here can clearly afford to handle it themselves.” Akari sighed, waving her hand dismissively.

“Fine.” Kuroko gave in, although she refused to dirty herself any further, instead attempting to get as much debris from the vacuum cleaner off of her as possible.

“By the way, what do you want us to call you again?” Yui asked mischievously, looking forward to this moment now that Kuroko had gone and gotten herself transformed.

“Kaleidoscope Black?” Kuroko said without hesitation.

“Hey, that’s not fair!” Yui complained. “Where’s your new name?”

“Why would I need a new name? Maids are mostly black.” Kuroko pointed out, crossing her arms. “What would I even call myself?”

Yui tried to think of something for a minute, then gave up and shrugged. Kuroko won for now.

“Everybody! Are you okay?”

The three heard Momoko yell down the hallway, the sound of the three drawing closer causing the two tired girls to pick themselves up, only to be surprised with a slightly different Sakura.

“Wow! You look so cute in that outfit!” Momoko gasped at Kuroko before anybody had a chance to react to Sakura, being stiffly ignored.

“Woah! What’s with the new hair?” Yui asked Sakura, who ran a finger through it proudly.

“It looks wonderful on me, doesn’t it? Doesn’t it just scream elegance?” She puffed out her chest, throwing Yui and Akari for a loop.

“Is she feeling okay?” Akari quietly asked Aoi, who looked utterly defeated.

“Just roll with it.” Aoi sighed as Sakura approached Kuroko, who suddenly seemed very embarrassed by her own getup.

“Why, if this isn’t a good look for you, miss Kuroko!” Sakura laughed. “I suppose you must feel silly for thinking yourself above our friends now!”

“What?” Kuroko tried to cover herself with her broom self-consciously. “I never said that…”

“Is that so? Then you must have a very good reason for making light of Miss Yui here when she was in the same place you’re standing right now! I hear you did the same for Akari too!” Sakura said, shocking the rest of the group. Sakura had always played nice with Kuroko, and now she seemed to be her biggest critic!

“That’s not… I didn’t mean to…” Kuroko stammered. “Sakura, what happened to you?”

“A little confidence booster, that’s all.” Sakura said, brushing it aside. “Now, apologise to Yui and Akari!”

“What does that have to do with-”

“Apologise!”

Kuroko seemed helpless, and awkwardly turned to the two of them.

“I’m sorry for laughing at you when this happened to you two.” She said meekly, bowing to the shocked girls.

“There, now you’re even!” Sakura said happily, Kuroko blushing and managing to pull herself upright.

“Okay, but really, what happened to you?” She asked, Sakura sighing.

“I suppose an explanation is in order.” Sakura agreed. “While you were busy with what I can only assume was the head maid, we were hard at work fighting its mistress, a rather horrid woman who postured as nobility. During the fight, I was struck, and I stand before you now as you can see.”

“That explains the attitude.” Yui laughed slightly, but realised she had some potential long headaches ahead of her. “Anyway, let’s go home, we can figure this out later.”

“Go home?” Sakura said with confusion. “This is home!”

--

“So you’re telling me there was a monster that makes you rich, and you killed it?” Yui groaned after the group changed back out of the sight of a very confused mob of would-be servants.

“Oh, let’s not worry about the small details.” Sakura smiled. “Let’s just be glad that it saved us the trip back! Besides, I can hardly imagine myself living in such a tiny place now.”

“Sounds terrible.” Akari said sarcastically. “I’m just glad you aren’t at some private school now.”

“Yes, my mother insisted.” Sakura said in her perfectly ironed and immaculately maintained school uniform that still matched the others, although it appeared to be hand-stitched. “She said that it would be good for me to mingle with the common folk and those less fortunate than myself. I must say that I do agree with her.”

“Speaking of which…” Aoi realised. “Where is your-”

“Sakura! There you are, darling!”

Aoi hardly had to wonder where Sakura got her looks or her attitude from. Her mother’s body and face remained mostly unchanged, though it was obvious she took better care of herself seeing as the faint wrinkles she’d had before were gone and her skin looked as radiant as a woman’s half her age. She wore a long, elegant emerald green evening dress with a thigh high slit up the left side of the dress to show off her long smooth leg and stylish heels. The red ruffled train of the skirt dragged behind her, looking vaguely like the layered petals of a rose. Her shiny green hair was done up in an elegant bun instead of her daughter’s long ringlets, but helped give her a sense of refinement that could only come with a bit of age.

“I’m terribly sorry about the mess, dearies!” Sakura’s mother apologised, grabbing Aoi by the hands as the girl mumbled out something about how it wasn’t a bother at all. “It’s quite the shock to myself as well! Even a woman as capable and intelligent as myself can hardly make heads or tails of it!”

“So, uh, what’s with all the maids and butlers and everything anyway?” Yui asked awkwardly, Sakura’s mom letting out a melodramatic sigh.

“Well, you see, it seems that I made a slight typo on the job listing I put out just the other day…” She began to explain. “I was hoping to hire a modest twenty more servants, only to find that I accidentally miswrote and said I wanted two hundred! And of course you know that we pay handsomely, and now it seems every maid, butler, and ladybutler in Japan is here! It’s such a hassle I think we might not get any new hires today at all, the screening process is simply impossible, not to mention the mess they’ve made trying to impress us…”

“That sounds like quite the ordeal, mother.” Sakura said sympathetically.

“My deepest sympathies, milady!” Kuroko bowed impulsively, as if compelled by her aura of wealth.

“No need to be so formal, dear.” Sakura’s mother giggled, patting her on the head. “Sakura, your friend is simply adorable! You should bring her over more often!”

“She is, isn’t she?” Sakura smirked, which turned into a full grin as she got an idea. “Actually mother, Kuroko here was just telling me about how she was thinking of becoming a professional maid once she graduates!”

“I did not!” Kuroko squeaked into Sakura’s ear, going unheard by her mother.

“My, how respectable of her!” Sakura’s mother exclaimed. “I’m sure she’d look absolutely splendid in a uniform!”

“In fact, perhaps instead of that rabble out there, we should hire her for the time being! Part time, of course.” Sakura’s hand slowly rose, starting to become her trademark gesture when breaking out into laughter, somehow managing to contain herself.

“What a wonderful idea!” Sakura’s mother enthusiastically agreed. “I’ll have a contract written up in no time!”

“You mean I can serve here? In a big mansion like this? With a real uniform?” Kuroko suddenly seemed enamoured with the idea before realising she was being watched by all of her friends and froze up. Kuroko looked desperately to the other girls for some kind of support, somebody who would say that Sakura was just joking, but they all completely averted their gaze.

“Of course you can! Sakura here was telling me just the other day that she wanted a personal maidservant!” Her mother laughed, Kuroko seemingly too cowed to climb out of the hole Sakura was digging her into. “Now then, I’m off to go see if I can’t sort this state of affairs out!”

“I wonder what she’s going to think when she sees the burn marks in the bedroom.” Momoko commented, the effects of the monster’s attack being quite permanent, at least until the room was remodelled. “Or the hallway you fought in…”

“Probably blame one of those hundred guys down there.” Akari figured, while the two transformed members of their team had other concerns.

“Why’d you say that?” Kuroko hissed at Sakura. “Now look what you’ve done!”

“Shouldn’t you be thanking me?” Sakura was utterly unperturbed. “I believe you said that you were hoping to spend more time alone with me, did you not? What better way to achieve that than by serving me? Cleaning my room myself is such a chore, after all.”

“I meant studying!” Kuroko said helplessly. “Just because my costume is maid-themed now doesn’t mean I want to be a maid!”

“Mmm-hmm, and Akari doesn’t want to get married as soon as she possibly can.” Sakura said sceptically. “No need to deny yourself, darling. We can do all the studying you want after you’re done with the dusting!”

“I’m being serious!” Kuroko insisted unconvincingly, Yui struggling to hold back her laughter while the others attempted to keep a straight face. “Besides, how am I supposed to know what to say when I don’t even know what’s going on? You just showed up acting like a completely different person!”

“I just said we’d have plenty of time to figure that out together, didn’t I?” Sakura laughed.

“I don’t want to work for somebody I don’t even know. You seem like you may as well be a stranger now!” Kuroko finally hardened herself and said, Momoko and the others flinching. There it was, they all thought to themselves. But Sakura, rather than looking hurt, seemed even more determined.

“A stranger, you say?” Sakura said, crossing her arms and almost pressing herself up against the strangely meek Kuroko, who suddenly felt smaller despite being noticeably taller than her. “It seems to me that it would be a wiser idea to make an informed decision, rather than a hasty one made before the day is even out! Unless you would presume that you can’t see my appeal?”

Kuroko blushed, clearly overwhelmed.

“I propose to you, miss Kuroko,” Sakura began to wind up again, one hand on her chest with the other outstretched with a smug smile on her lips. “That we put your theory to the test! That we become inseparable until a conclusion is drawn! There’s no way you couldn’t like somebody as lovely and elegant as me!”

“W-what? I’m not going to spend all day with you just because you put it like that.” Kuroko said unconvincingly. “I don’t want to. Besides-”

“What’s that, miss Kuroko? You’d love to spend time with your refined and beautiful, not to mention intelligent and charming teammate?” Sakura totally ignored her. “Why, I’m flattered, I’m so glad you agree! Why don’t we discover what’s so great about me together? While we’re at it, I think I’ll have you dust my room and iron my uniform since you have such a passion for cleanliness!”

She grabbed Kuroko by the hand and dragged her away while laughing haughtily, but strangely, at least to Momoko, Kuroko didn’t seem to be complaining. They were just about to leave the room before the door burst open and the two were flattened by Hotaru charging through out of the blue, crashing into the two and landing chest-first on their faces.

“There you are! Like, what’s going on!?” Hotaru babbled as she picked herself off the dazed girls, looking practically haggard. “I was just at Sakura’s place studying and then, like, I’m like, in a room bigger than my house and I’m like, wow, where am I, and then, like, this old guy called Sebastian comes in and, like, asks me if I want some more tea, and I’m like, oh-em-gee, where am I, who are you, and I kinda freaked out a little, so I was like, I’m outta here, and then I got lost ‘cause this place is huge, and then I’m here, and that’s what happened!”

Hotaru paused to take in a huge breath, her chest heaving mightily as she gasped.

“By the way Sakura, did you do something with your hair?” She asked, looking down at the girl who had been nearly knocked out by her cleavage. “It looks nice!”

--

“Must we really do the quiz? I believe I’ve made myself quite clear.” Sakura sighed, fanning herself in the shrine that the girls called their home base. They had met up there after school the next day, it being their typical get-together place for checking any changes to their transformations, or in this case, running impromptu personality tests.

“It’s just to be safe.” Aoi insisted, the other girls nodding. “Kuroko has to do it too.”

“Do I have to?” Kuroko complained as well, dressed in her maid uniform and dusting the neglected corners of the room. “Liking it when things are clean doesn’t count as a personality change!”

“Just go with it, Kuroko.” Yui said, already exhausted from the new Sakura and not in the mood for Kuroko’s moodiness. To her surprise, Kuroko gave in very easily, nodding and going back to her dusting.

“Alright, let’s begin. This’ll only take a minute. Just say the first thing that comes to mind each time.” Aoi instructed. Sakura folded her fan and prepared.

“You’re in the…”

“Gardening club!”

“You have a passion for…”

“Flowers of all kinds!”

“Your grade is…”

“Second year!”

“When in a group, you like to be…”

“The centre of attention!”

“When working in a group, the best thing to do is…”

“Listen to what everybody has to say!”

“The one of us you like the least is…”

“What a rude thing to ask! To imply that I have any grievances with any one of you!”

Aoi sighed in relief. Sakura had quite the attitude now, and she had serious concerns about the quality of her teamwork with how self-absorbed she seemed to be, but at least on a basic level, she didn’t seem to be too far off from the original Sakura save for her shyness being replaced with a reckless amount of self-confidence.

“Okay, time for Kuroko.” Akari enthusiastically grabbed her and pulled her into the circle.

“You’re in the…” Aoi started.

“Literature club. Did you think I was going to be a janitor now?” Kuroko was snippy as usual.

“Your grade is…”

“Second year.”

“You prefer spending time…”

“Alone.”

“You have a passion for…”

Kuroko hesitated, straining to hold back her very predictable real answer.

“Reading.” she decided upon delicately, too transparent to bother challenging.

“Is it better to follow orders or follow your own judgement?”

“Follow orders unless they’re- hey, what’s with the weird question?”

“The one of us you like the least is…”

“Momoko.” Kuroko said without hesitation.

“Hey! What did I do?” Momoko protested as Yui snickered, having expected to hear her name instead.

“She’s probably still not over that time you tried to forgive her for being grumpy and lonesome all the time because you thought she got attacked by a goth monster like how I got hit by a gyaru monster.” Yui held back her giggles while Kuroko began to flush bright red.

“I just don’t get along with no-brain power of friendship types. That’s all!” Kuroko turned away, escaping to the next room over. With the test over the atmosphere of the room dissipated, the girls breaking into their own conversations. Momoko however asked to speak with Sakura privately, separating from the pack.

“Yes? You clearly have something on your mind, to drag me over here.” Sakura said impatiently once they were one room over from the group, and two rooms over from Kuroko. “Out with it!”

“I don’t think that you should have forced Kuroko to be your maid.” Momoko admitted.

“Oh, nonsense, she’s clearly enjoying it. You should ask her to clean your room sometime and see the look on her face.” Sakura said dismissively.

“Maybe, but you were taking advantage of her!” Momoko accused, disliking the idea of there being some kind of power dynamic in their group.

“Advantage?” Sakura raised an eyebrow. “If she had a problem with it, she could have simply said no whenever she wanted. She still can, in fact.”

“Yeah, but you made it really awkward for her.”

“You know what else is awkward for her?” Sakura began to get on a roll. “Saying that you’re busy preparing for a test and that’s why you can’t go out with the group, then getting caught reading manga at home when I come over to help study. Or sitting in the back of a cafe pretending you aren’t there because you don’t want to spend time with your friends for some silly reason. Or claiming that you have urgent literature club business and that’s why you can’t go shopping with Hotaru and Aoi, on a day that the literature club isn’t meeting, and having to hide in the gardening club room! Or pretending you’re some kind of lone wolf outsider for six months and then complaining that you’ve set an image for yourself that would be hard to break so you shouldn’t try every time your friend tells you to open up! Goodness, I don’t know what to do with that girl! She’s lucky that’s what makes her so cute!”

Sakura turned up her nose in a huff after ranting for a minute, paused, then continued more calmly.

“It’s up to Kuroko to decide whether or not she’s happy with her current predicament. Following one’s impulses is one thing, and deciding to be defined by them is another. Kuroko may be content playing the maid for now, but if she ever expresses discomfort, I’ll terminate our contract and never mention it again. Until then, I’ll enjoy her being my little handmaid!”

Sakura let out her trademark laugh that drew confused stares from the rest of the girls as Sakura took her leave, Kuroko only returning once Sakura was gone to share something with them.

“She’s not as different as she seems, you know. She was really worried you might not trust her.” Kuroko mentioned quietly, Yui looking sceptical.

“Really? I can’t see it. How do you know that?”

Kuroko turned away once again, this time with a smile.

“That’s a secret!”