Saturday Night

     The camera panned down on the now completed rooftop stage. What had days before been a modest platform and some scaffolding had exploded outwards into it’s own miniature outdoors auditorium. From each edge of the roof in front of the stage, seats and steps extended outwards at an angle, looking as though they must have been suspended magically in the air. From the side, it almost looked like someone had cut the tip off a pyramid, turned it upside down, and pasted it to the top of a hotel.

     The stage itself had a much more professional air to it than the girls had seen it lat. For starters, there was now a proper, red, ornate curtain, preventing the audience from seeing what secrets it held behind it. There was also the fact that all the equipment for lighting, sound, filming, pyrotechnics, and all other things that would be needed to film off of the stage were finally set up. The final major difference was the addition of three large televisions that were attached to the scaffolding of the stage and angled towards each side of the auditorium, so that even the audience members in the back row could see the magic that was being seen with clarity.

     The packed auditorium erupted into cheering as Drake Bordignon stepped out from behind the curtain. A chant of “Drake! Drake! Drake!” echoed, as he took a couple of bows before calming down the audience so he could give his introduction.

     “Ladies and Gentlemen!” Screams of joy interrupted Drake, but he persevered, knowing the TV studios would deafen the audience in post, “A week ago, we challenged these contestants with a first for the series: To design and perform a two-person trick. If you’ve been paying attention at home, then you’ll know these girls have been working hard, through trials and tribulations, in order to deliver to you the best representation of their ability. Tonight, you will get to see what all this hard work has been culminating to.

     But before we start the show, could you please put your hands together for our celebrity judges, Penny and Jean!” A spotlight shot out, and the camera focused on the two veteran assistants sitting in the front row who were waving to the audience. They were wearing similar outfits to what they had been wearing for their introduction, and each had a clipboard. Drake continued, “They’ve been absolutely lovely guests all of this week, and we’re so sad to see them go. But thankfully, they’ll be helping out our contestants one last time by providing them feedback on their individual performances. So, from everyone on the America’s Next Great Assistant Team, we hope that your flight home later tonight goes smoothly, and wish you luck on your next magical endeavors.” The audience cheered, Penny and Jean stood up and took a bow.

     Once the audience’s applause had died down once more, Drake announced, “And now! On to the main event! Ladies and Gentlemen, may I introduce, for the first time performing in almost twenty years, making his big television debut: Mr. Howard Weiss and his lovely assistants!”

     The curtains began to rise, revealing the first of the night’s three acts.

~~~

Annette & Elise

     The curtain rose to a scene that looked like a bedroom, with Howard seemingly sleeping peacefully in a bed, a black shape resting on the sheets on top of him, with countless pieces of art displayed around the room. As Howard snored, the sound of glass breaking echoed through the speakers, awakening Howard, as Annette and Elise entered into the scene on the opposite side of the stage, both wearing identical black cat-burglar costumes.

     Howard sat up in bed, fumbling to put on a pair of glasses while he ‘turned on’ the stage light and asked, “Who goes there?”

     Elise spoke up, saying, “Shut up, Old Man! We heard about your collection of priceless art pieces and we’re here to take them! Just go back to bed and nobody’ll get hurt!”

     Howard grinned, the black shape slowly slinking off the bed and making its way towards the two assistants. “Girls, I would suggest that you two simply walk back out that window you just broke through right now, or else-“

     “Or else you’ll call the cops?” Annette asked.

     “No, or else I’ll be forced to add you two to my collection,” He said sternly.

     Annette and Elise looked each other and laughed. After Annette calmed down slightly, she asked, “And how are you going to do that, old man?”

     Howard just grinned as he ordered, “Rocky. Sic ‘em!” From the ground, the black shape leaped up, latching onto Annette’s arm and pulled it off her (at least, that’s how it appeared to the audience, the truth was Annette had detached her arm just at the right time to make it appear like Rocky ripped it off). The shape digested the arm, before quickly leaping up again and doing the same thing to Annette’s other arm, leaving her looking like the Venus de Milo.

     Annette barely had time to let off a scream, before Rocky finished digesting the arm and leaped towards Elise. Luckily, Elise sensing that she was probably about to be hit with the same fate as her partner, moved her hands in a circle, summoning a cubed forcefield of blue energy around her, barely allowing her to stand up in the box of energy that she had created. Rocky harmlessly bounced off the forcefield, but kept assailing the forcefield whenever it landed. Eventually though, Rocky seemed to grow tired of attacking the forcefield, his weird black, prehensile tongue sticking out of his mouth as he jumped on top of the cube and eyed Elise suspiciously from above.

Of course, Howard seemed to already have a solution to this problem, as he ordered, “Rocky. Crush!” Rocky’s body began to morph, as the black ball of fur ballooned outwards into a black cube of fur and muscle, just slightly less long and wide than the box that Elise had inadvertently trapped herself in. The box of fur that was Rocky began to stretch upwards, and as he did so, he clearly was gaining mass from some unknown source, as Elise place her hands against the roof of her box, trying her best to keep the roof from caving in. Of course, as Rocky continued to grow upwards, this became a futile task, as slowly but surely, the roof of her self-imposed cage was pushed lower and lower, the walls of her energy cube remaining consistent.

     Eventually, Rocky’s cube form reached the ground, having evidently squished Elise completely flat. As Howard got out of bed, ordering Rocky to return to normal, Rocky got off of Elise, revealing a flat piece of flesh of Elise’s skin color with her face smack dab in the center of it, her eyes spinning in confusion. Howard walked over to a blank easel he had set up, flipping Elise face side down so that the easel was now covered in a layer of black fabric, the slightest imprint of feet visible in the center.

     Annette began to grovel, now understanding that they had chosen to rob the wrong person, “Please sir, just let me go! I promise I won’t say anything about what’s happened tonight!”

     “I’m afraid that the time for that has long since passed,” Howard said, picking up a paint brush and examining it, “For I’ve already prepped the easel, and it would be a shame to let inspiration disappear so easily.” Rocky eyed his master as he slowly walked up to where the armless Annette stood, frozen with fear. “Rocky. Paint, please.” Howard commanded.

     Annette barely had enough time to scream, as Rocky seemed to unhinge its magically massive jaws, swallowing Annette in a single bite. Rocky walked over to where a paint can was placed on the floor, the lump that was Annette slowly getting smaller and smaller as she appeared to be digested by Rocky.

     Rocky extended his legs so that his midsection was perfectly placed above the paint can, and suddenly his chest split open like a trapdoor, with paint the color of Annette’s skin splashing into the paint can all at once, accidentally coating the surrounding area in the flesh colored paint too.

     Howard walked over, picking up the paint can and placing it on a stool near where his new Elise canvas rested. He dipped his paintbrush into the paint can, drawing a few lines himself before announcing, “Bah! I always hated the old fashioned way of doing art!”

     He picked up the paint can and flung the paint at the canvas. The paint began dripping off the canvas, until, like magic, the only remaining paint on the canvas looked like a near photo perfect image of a very frightened Annette and Elise in their cat burglar outfits, the paint becoming the appropriate shade for each part, despite having only been made of a single color.

     David grabbed the painting up, hanging it on a spot above the fireplace and kissing his hands commenting, “Voila! My masterpiece!” Before the curtain fell down.

~~~

Maya & Sable

     The curtain rose to an interesting scene. Sitting at a rather formal looking black desk was Howard Weiss, his normal classic-style suit replaced with a purple variant of it, a black eye-patch covering his left eye and a black top-hat with a purple accent around the rim. The backdrop was a curtain with a repeating pattern of gold, purple, and green. Standing nearby a large coffin in similar color stood open, revealing nothing inside of it.

     From the opposite side of the stage, Maya barged in, dragging along behind her Sable. While Maya looked relatively normal, although she was wearing a large, green puffy dress, Sable clearly was changed, her black hair tied up in a ridiculous bun that only accentuated the fact that she was completely missing her face. “Excuse me sir, are you the witch doctor?”

     “I am indeed, little girlie,” Howard had a sadistic grin on his face as he stood up from his chair. He seemed to be attempting to do a Louisiana accent, but it came off as more of a pirate’s accent than he intended. “What seems to be the problem?”

     “It’s my sister,” Maya explained, helping Sable stand in the middle of the stage, showing off her clear lack of face, “She was cursed by an ancient swamp witch last week, and now her face has disappeared.”

     Howard prowled over slowly, grabbing Sable’s head by the chin and tilting it this way and that to better show-off the fact that her face was completely flat, as though she had never had a face. “Well my dearie,” Howard purred, “this seems to be some pretty strong stuff. But-“ He smiled menacingly, “I should be able to do it… for a small price of course.”

     “Anything,” Maya said, her singular eye tearing up a bit as she said, “I’d pay any amount for my sister to have a face again!”

     “Excellent dearie,” Howard reached into his purple coat pocket, pulling out a large piece of old looking parchment paper and a black feather, “then all I need you to do is sign your name on this dotted line, and I will get right to returning your sister’s face.” Maya grabbed the feather, signing the paper in a suspiciously red ink. When she had finished, her signature lite up, causing the entire paper to combust into ashes. “Excellent,” He said.

     Howard walked back around to the other side of the desk, pulling out a rather plain looking twig, and touching it to the top of Sable’s head, chanting some nonsensical sounding words. From the point where Howard touch, a wood grain texture slowly began to grow, and within a couple of seconds, Sable had completely transformed into a wooden figure of herself. Although, with the fact that she currently still lacked a face, the only features that would have gotten that point across was the fact that she still had her hair, and was still wearing the black puffy dress that she had came in with. It was also then noticeable that the new statue version of Sable had a variety of ball and swivel joints, that allowed for her parts to still move where they would if she were still human.

     Of course, Howard was making quick work of that, pulling off her hair like it was a wig, and getting her out of her puffy dress. “Oh my! For what reason are you doing that?” Maya asked, her cheeks turning red.

     “Unfortunately, my magic does not work well with such frilly clothing in the way. Here,” He said, tossing a plain looking black leotard at her, “You’ll need to put this on. You can use that cabinet to change into it,” he pointed towards the coffin.

     “A swimsuit?!” Maya asked, “Uh, how uncivilized,” but despite her protests, she still entered into the cabinet, stepping out a moment later having executed the quick change perfectly to some minor applause.

     “Alright, for this next part, I’m going to need you to hug your sister,” Howard explained standing up after he had finally gotten a matching swimsuit on to Sable, “and just concentrate on all the love and affection you have towards her. How she represents such a big part of her life that you simply could not go on living without her,” Howard explained, handing the Sable statue over to Maya.

     Maya, for her part, closed her eyes and concentrated, and slowly, the statue of Sable seemed to give off a faint glow. Eventually, the glow shown even brighter, until it looked like the wooden statue might catch fire. Thankfully, that didn’t happen, instead the light dying down and revealing that there was now a large blue eye painted on Sable right where it would have been if she herself were a cyclops.

     Both Maya and Sable fell to the floor, as Maya said, “Doctor! What’s going on! Why can’t I move my anymore?”

     Howard laughed maniacally, as he pulled out some length of string from his pocket, tying the ends around the Sable puppet’s neck, wrists and feet. He then pulled out a classic puppet control bar, and attached the other ends of the string to it.

     Suddenly, Sable’s lifeless body floated up into the air, righting itself in a standing position, as Maya’s body did much the same. “Doctor! Please tell me what’s going on! I thought you said you were returning my sister’s face?”  \“Oh I am,” Howard grinned evilly, “but I thought that I would have some fun first! After all, I so rarely get someone gullible enough to sign my contracts.” From the various speakers around the stage, Jazz music began to play, and the Sable puppet began dancing the Charleston, Maya unwillingly mirroring Sable’s moves exactly.

     “What have you done to us?” Maya begged.

     “Well, thanks to the strong bond with your sister, I simply took advantage of that bond to transform your sister into a very powerful voodoo doll.”  \“But how is this supposed to help return her face to her?” Maya asked.

     “My dear, you only requested that I give her a face,” Howard grinned, “However, if you’re so insistent, I will get on to the fulfillment of your part of the contract.” Howard snapped his fingers, and suddenly, both of his assistants froze in place.

     They turned to look at each other, before the Sable puppet reached up, grabbing its wooden head, and lifting it off of its shoulders. Maya did the same, impossibly removing her head from her body without any signs of blood. The two began tossing heads in between each other, catching them and throwing them in perfect sync. Eventually, the puppet began throwing other parts of her body into the mix, like a leg, or an arm, until the two assistants were a blur of thrown parts, impossibly rebounding as they reached the point where a body had once stood.

     Eventually, the blur began to die down, and there was once again a noticeable change that had occurred during the blur of activity. Standing to one side was a significantly taller puppet, still with one large blue eye painted, but now sporting a wig of Maya’s hair. At the other end, stood a flesh and blood Sable once more, although her face was now a perfect copy of Maya’s face, and she was completely bald. “Oops. Knew I forgot something,” Howard walked over, placing Sable’s former hair back on her body, where it fused to her scalp.

     Sable gave a tug on her hair, confirming that it was stuck now, and asked, in her own voice, “What have you done to my sister?”

     “Never you mind dearie,” Howard said, picking up the Maya statue and placing it close to his desk, where he promptly sat down, placing his feet on his desk, “It’s all in the contract she signed. You get her face, and she gets to be my new display mannequin.”

     “You’ll never get away with this!” Sable said.

     “No need to bother yourself any further with trying to help her,” Howard said, eyeing her with his good eye “Wouldn’t want you to end up in another unfortunate situation, would we?”

     “I’m going to go get the police!” Sable said emotionally, her single large eye tearing up as she went towards the door.

     Of course, Howard wouldn’t have any of that. Standing up, he plucked Maya’s head from his new mannequin and dropped it to the floor, Sable’s head similarly falling off her body in a similar manner.

     He reached down, held the head up for the crowd and grinned, “I did warn you dearie. But, I guess I found the start of my new shrunken head collection too!”

     Howard’s maniacal laugh accompanied the large red curtain closing on this grim scene.

~~~

Patricia & Sinopia

     The curtains rose to a rather plain scene. Standing in the center of the stage was Howard Weiss in a plain black turtleneck and jeans, a pair of plain looking glasses sticking out of his regular slicked-back hair. Slightly behind him stood Sinopia, who was busily tapping away at a tablet looking device.

     Howard cleared his throat, causing Sinopia to visibly jump and look forwards, as though she weren’t aware that they were already performing. “Welcome everyone to Weiss Corp’s newest product unveiling. Here with me today to explain our discovery is our new head of science, Sinopia!”

     The crowd applauded, as Sinopia nervously took some steps forwards, “Hello everyone,” Sinopia said, tapping some more on her tablet as she explained, “For years now, we’ve known that the body converts our body’s natural energy into magical energy through the process known as magic production. Which got our lab team thinking, what else could we change in the human body into something else. Could we turn stomach acid into another form of acid? Or what about blood into wine? Or! Turning brain waves into wifi waves?”

     She laughed, “It was this last one that really got our lab tech’s brains churning. Because surely, if we could convert brain waves into wifi waves… Right? Well, here to help demo this hypothesis is our intern Patricia”

     Patricia walked out rather robotically, which normally would have been a problem, had it not been for the fact that she currently seemed to be a robot. Her body was composed of metal plates that delivered the illusion of skin, but their bright gold coloring clearly could not have been achieved on any person. “I’m certain to the naked eye, Patricia here looks like a highly advanced robot. And she is… but only because we’ve ordered her brain to transform her into one. Watch as I command her to return back to normal!”

     Sinopia pressed some buttons, and before the audience’s eyes, the various plates began to shift together, changing color as Patricia transformed back into her brown skinned self wearing a golden bikini top and bottom. She clearly had a look of restraint on her face as she tried to smile, striking a pose and showing off her body to the cheers of the audience.

     “Of course, there’ll be those naysayers out there who think we’ve just developed a super powered android or something. So let me see if I can alleviate those concerns,” Sinopia pressed a few more buttons, and Patricia started to lie down, her body levitating itself in the middle of the stage. Sinopia walked up, removing one of her golden stilettos and started tickling the sole, leaving Patricia in a state of uncontrollable laughter.

     As Patricia began to upright, Sinopia continued, “One of the best things we’ve figured out how to do so far is to program ‘triggers’ within our subjects. For instance,” She tapped some buttons, and Patricia seemed to stand up straighter. “Patricia, Fold.”

     Patricia’s bend down at her waist, her spine bending around in a circle, as she pulled herself through her own legs, clawing her way up her back as she rested her arms and head on her back. “Deeper!” Sinopia commanded, and impossibly, Patricia’s upper torso continued clawing its way down her body, doing another full rotation before returning to its spot resting atop her back. Sinopia commanded her to go one layer deeper a few more times, the folded skin progressively getting more and more flat as Patricia’s upper half looped around her hips.

     It was after a few more of these loops, that Howard walked back into focus on stage, taking the tablet from Sinopia’s hands, as he said, “Sinopia, Awaken.” Suddenly, Sinopia’s appearance also shifted, her make-up and lab coat disappearing into a similar two piece outfit as Patricia’s, only colored bright orange like her hair instead of the gold that Patricia was wearing. “And this, Ladies and Gentlemen, is our intern Sinopia, demonstrating the ability of our device to maintain multiple connections at the same time, and to implant false memories. Now, Sinopia, Patricia, Combine.” Howard commanded.

     Sinopia stood still, as Patricia’s head slowly morphed away into her upper body, her upper body extending outwards as the loops compressed and eventually merged, returning her lower body to normal. Once her upper half extend outwards enough to reach Sinopia’s rear, the skin seemed to melt into each other, the skin becoming a light brown, as Patricia’s arms continuing to climb up Sinopia’s body and conclude their journey right beneath her own.

     His two assistant’s final form complete, Howard, jumped up onto his new conjoined humantaur, the girls rearing up on Patricia’s legs as he said, “This concludes our presentation!” and riding them offstage as the curtains fell.

~~~

     “Well, that’s our show everyone!” Drake announced, walking out from behind the curtain once more, “And unfortunately, that means it’s time for the worst part of the night. The part where you, the audience at home, must choose one of these lovely ladies and send them back home. You can choose using whatever criteria you wish, but you can only vote for one, so make sure it counts. We want to wish all of our contestants the best of luck in staying in this competition, and to all of you watching at home, Goodnight Everybody!”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

& Question Corner &

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

     To Sable: “You gave me quite a scare when Jean told me what happened, and when I finally saw the context on the latest episode. But I understand. If it helps, I get nervous, too, even now. Feeling like I'm one step from something going horribly wrong. But those nerves, once you get used to them, become more of a thrill.

     The piece of advice I would have to share is this: learn to adapt. Competency is just keeping one step ahead of the avalanche, and knowing what your home is like from your audition, you've got a lot of experience with that. And even if something goes wrong, if you can adapt, the audience will just think it's part of the act.” -@@WanderTones

     Thank you for the advice Penny! I had a wonderful time performing tonight, and I see exactly what you mean! I’ll try my best to remember everything that you and Jean have taught me in mind if I make it to the next round!

     To Annette: “So far we've only seen Rocky take on organic forms: animals or animal-like characteristics, metamorphosed into whatever suits your need. Seeing Rocky take on attributes of an inanimate object, one with a defined shape or structure, is a whole other deal. Is he capable of turning into more complex inanimate forms, such as furniture or clothing?” -@@WanderTones

     He is capable of being turned into more complex inanimate forms, but the more complex it is, the less he likes to stay as it. For my first school dance, I considered wearing him as a dress, that way he’d be allowed in since the school had a really strict ‘no pets’ policy. But unfortunately he would keep getting really antsy and start to shift back after a couple of minutes.

     Thankfully though, I only really need him to turn into an inanimate object in a show setting, which usually won't be more than a couple of minutes at most.

     To Howard: “While we have the opportunity: I just want to thank you for being such a generous host. I haven't stayed in such an extravagant hotel, and the services are extraordinary. With all my heart, thank you, and I wish you the best with this chaotic little mess of eager assistants.” -@@WanderTones

     Thank you Penny! My staff prides themselves on their service, so I'll make sure to pass the message along. As for the assistants? Well, hopefully I’ll be able to make something out of at least one of them!

     To the crew of ANGA: “My thanks go out to all of you as well. From being an active viewer since the start of season 1, to Jean and my appearances this week, to our treatment behind the scenes, you have provided me with some of my favourite TV experiences, on both sides of the screen.” -@@WanderTones

     Drake: As the spokesperson for ANGA, I’d like to extend our gratitude on the behalf of the entire ANGA crew. You and Jean have been absolutely wonderful to work with, and the fact that we were able to deliver an enjoyable experience for you means the world to us.

     To Sable: “Hey Sable, I am not sure if I can relate but I can understand how it feels to be nervous about messing up over something important. Especially when doing it in front of so many people. If anything, my advice is to use that as an opportunity to go wild and do what's need to be done. That's how I ended up overcoming public speaking and got praised for it. Sorry to brag, I'm just trying to help.” -@@quad2

     Sable: Trust me, if there’s one thing I hate most in the world, it would probably be public speaking (among other things of course). I have to say though, performing without my face has definitely helped open my heart a little bit to the idea of trying to perform with it.