Amy looked at the board. Ace of Spades, Seven of Clubs, Ten of Spades, Jack of Spades. She took a peek at her hand. Ace of Diamonds, Ace of Hearts. Victoria and Charlotte were out of the hand. Ophelia and Fiona were waiting on Amy’s decision.
“I’ll make a small bet,” said Amy. There were no chips at the table. All of the women knew what a small bet was; a foot or a hand. But Amy didn’t move to throw part of herself on the table. Someone could raise. She might have to wager more.
Fiona was next to act. Within five seconds of double-checking her cards, she folded. “I’d rather keep what I have for a better hand.” Fiona smirked. She resumed caressing the two inert arms on her lap, occasionally twiddling the unresponsive fingers with her own nimble digits.
Ophelia leaned back in her chair to get her feet back on the table. She struggled to get her toe under the edge of her cards to see them.
Fiona giggled to herself. “Why don’t you just pick them up, Ophie?” She held and squeezed the hands of the disembodied arms in her lap.
Ophelia stared daggers at Fiona. The other four women chuckled. She sighed and smiled weakly. “All you have to do is give me my arms back.” She managed to get a toe to lift one of the cards, but it slid off before she saw it. “Ugh, whatever. I’m pretty sure I remember my cards. I’ll call the small bet.”
”Oooooo, haven’t you risked enough? You aren’t going to have anything left to bring home,” said Charlotte. She ignored the severed pair of feet sitting on her lap.
Victoria was glancing back and forth between the feet and her legs. She mused over how she could get her feet back from Charlotte, but wasn’t getting the right cards. She hoped for the next round, then remembered she was the dealer. “Alright, last card.”
Everyone watched as Victoria flipped over the Ace of Clubs.
(‘Oh my god! Four of a Kind! Four Aces! I got it!’) Amy was internally screaming, but outwardly composed. She waited several seconds. “Raise to a large bet.”
She skipped past medium (a whole limb) and went straight for large; hips, torso, or head. In the tense silence that followed, Ophelia asked, “Which are you betting?”
”…I’ll choose…my…” she gulped. She looked at her cards again. She felt her hips. She closed her eyes. “I’ll wager my head.”
Amy didn’t know that all eyes were on her. Fiona, Victoria, and Charlotte all slowly turned their heads towards Ophelia before their eyes snapped over to look at her.
“I’ll call. I’ll wager my torso.” Ophelia’s teeth showed through the wide smile her mouth stretched into.
Amy triumphantly flipped over her cards. “Four of a Kind! Aces!”
Ophelia whistled, then chortled. “Hey Fiona, can you flip my cards over for me? I’d rather not make you all wait four years for me to use my feet.”
Amy’s confidence waned. “I mean, you can just say you lost again, heh heh…”
Fiona slid the cards to her side of the table. She lifted them so only she could see them. Her mouth dropped open. Before Amy could start complaining to see them, Fiona dropped the cards to the table face up.
They were the King and Queen of Spades.
”Royal Flush wins over Four of a Kind,” said Victoria. It came out in an astonished whisper.
Amy’s arms dropped to her thighs. “Are you kidding me?! But I haaa- woo, had fourrr…” Amy’s eye’s twitched. Her eyelids fluttered out of sync as her pupils drifted in opposite directions. “Aye…Ace…is…”
Charlotte covered her mouth, eyes wide but glistening. Victoria had her fists clenched and mouthed out a silent but passionate ‘yes!’ Fiona clapped once and declared, “This is what I’ve been waiting for!”
Amy turned her head in Fiona’s direction. Her eyes wouldn’t cooperate with her. “Yuh…you didnnnt…” Her head felt heavy. She let it droop towards her chest. “Huh…huwhaa…” Then her head felt lighter than air.
The rest saw what she could not. Amy’s neck stretched out for a few long seconds before it snapped in half. The stretched neck halves rebounded like rubber, leaving Amy with a smooth neck stump but no head to put on it. Her lost head smacked the card table and bobbled to a stop. She stood statuesque for several seconds. Then her fingers started coiling and scratching her thighs.
Ophelia looked into the slack-jawed face of her friend. (‘Well, it *was* her face while this was her head.’) She looked over to her lost arms. “Hey, Fiona. Would you like my new head?”
Amy didn’t object. It wasn’t her head anymore. Her hands had finally crawled their way to the top of her neck stump. She had bet her head. She lost. Her hands twitched. She sat back down. There was no panicked reaching out. Amy kept her hands on and around her headless neck as she squirmed in place.
”Aaah, that’s so much better.” Ophelia flexed her arms. She looked from hand to hand as she opened and closed her fists. “Thanks for doing business with me!”
Fiona walked from behind Ophelia to the card table. “The pleasure is all mine.” She picked up Amy’s head, then sat back down. She pet the hair of her new head like it was a cat in her lap. “So, Charlotte’s turn to deal?”
“Oh, right!” Charlotte gathered the cards back into a deck. She nudged the deck against the back of Amy’s hands.
Amy flinched, then touched the deck of cards. She carefully grabbed them. (‘Fine…fuck…reduced to a house appliance…’) Amy shuffled the deck of cards several times. Despite her beheading, she managed to keep all but one card in the stack by the time she set it down. Charlotte fixed that issue and dealt the next hand as Amy resumed fidgeting with her stump.
After just three more betting hands, the women were drastically different. Victoria had won back her feet. Both her and Fiona had lost their literal hands to Charlotte. But the last of the three betting rounds was the biggest change. Ophelia took down another large bet win against both Charlotte and Victoria. Charlotte kept her head by giving up Victoria’s and Fiona’s hands.
Victoria arched her back. She swiped her handless arms across the table. Her limbs prodded and nudged her unconscious severed head. She tried to cradle her head on her forearms until Ophelia grabbed her head by its’ hair. Victoria drummed her stumps on the table. Her waist twisted and tilted her torso. Her shortened limbs clumsily rubbed and struck her headless neck. She stood up. A couple short backwards steps shoved her chair out of her way. She turned and staggered past Charlotte, then shuffled sideways to maintain her balance. Victoria walked into a wall before finding the doorway. She used it, leaving her head and hands to the victors.
Fiona watched her decapitated girlfriend flail and flee without moving a muscle. She knew she couldn’t (and wouldn’t) open a door like that. She’s had Victoria headless more days than not. But this was a bit different, wasn’t it? Victoria probably wasn’t getting her head back. Or their hands. She looked down at Amy’s head on her lap. She looked to Charlotte and Ophelia. “One more hand?”
“Last hand,” said Charlotte. She had something and lost it twice already. She wanted to walk away with *something* tonight.
“Only if…we large bet. Before we see our cards.” She looked between the four hands and Victoria’s former head. She put all four hands on the table.
”I’ll call,” said Fiona. She put up Amy’s head. “Charlotte?”
”Uh…well…” She hesitated. She looked over at Amy laying down on the bed. She was idly tracing the edge of her neck stump and occasionally stretching into a new position. “I…call. With…my head. Fuck it.”
The deal only took thirty seconds. Fiona had pocket kings. The board didn’t give Ophelia or Charlotte anything better. Fiona reattached her hands and flexed them, then picked up Victoria’s hands.
Charlotte cursed her luck. She calmly stood, then bent in half. Her hands and massive chest rested on the table. Her eyes glazed over, her jaw slackened, and her head barely dropped an inch when it fell off of her body. Charlotte pressed against the table to stand upright. She was more familiar with Ophelia’s home - she guided her headless body out of the room with surprising ease.
“Is she going to stay inside, or…” Fiona stared asking, but stopped when she heard a door open. It creaked, stopped; it creaked louder, and slammed shut.
“Sheeee definitely just left,” said Ophelia. Charlotte’s abandoned head stared blankly back at her.
Before she could think it through, Victoria flailed her way back into the room. Fiona casually stepped up to her writhing woman and snuck her hands back where they belonged. Victoria rotated her wrists and bounced in place, then pointed at her headless neck.
”Listen, Ophie, you don’t have to trade Victoria’s head to me, but-“
“Sure. I want Amy’s head.”
Fiona sighed in relief. “Done.”
Ophelia couldn’t help but laugh as Fiona reattached Victoria’s head only to tell her that it belongs to her now. Before Victoria could comment, Fiona continued; “If you want to have a head tonight, you’ll carry both my new heads in this bag. And don’t think of putting one of them on your neck!”
Victoria had a mix of worry and wonder on her face. “O…okay, Fifi, I will.” She took the bag from Fiona. Fiona dropped Charlotte’s head in the bag. Then Fiona tugged Victoria’s head off and dumped it in, too. Victoria twitched and shuffled backwards. She walked out of the room with two heads but none of her own. She forced Fiona to follow her as she blindly cruised her way out of the house.
Ophelia locked the door behind them. She went back into her game room to grab Amy’s head. She let her beheaded bestie lay there and left the room.
Amy simply idled in place. She was in a zen state from teasing her neck and laying down.
Charlotte wandered vaguely in the direction of her apartment. She let her hands guide her. Her hands touched nothing for nearly half an hour. The buxom beheaded babe was no closer to getting home than when she started, but nowhere near Ophelia’s place, and further from the bag that held her head (not that she could use that anymore).
Fiona got her spoils and Victoria back to her place. Both of her new heads were displayed in locked cases within minutes of getting home. She toyed with her decapitated girlfriend for many days before her head would leave the case.
——————
Happy New Year!
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