Bart Allen, more widely known as Kid Flash, was not surprised to meet Conner Kent overlooking STAR labs. While Superman and the Justice League were busy elsewhere with another crisis, the Teen Titans had helped out by keeping an eye on Metropolis. It only made sense the two fastest members of the group had arrived first.

"Okay, Conner, you won this one... What's happening?" Bart asked, looking at the assembled police cars below, as well as the usual media circus beyond the cordon.

"I've no idea. Police have the place locked down, and whoever attacked the labs knows how much of it is lead lined, and soundproofed. From what I can tell the police sent a group in, but they lost contact."

"Great. At least they seem to be holding everyone back..."

At this, there were screams from below. The pair were there in an instant.

"What happened?" Conner asked a policeman crouched behind a car, as the crowd of reporters began to flee.  

The policeman simply pointed into the crowd as it dispersed revealing a hapless man in a suit transformed into a strange green substance. Conner, fully aware of the possible risks, kept back as Bart looked the victim over, but before even he could speak, a woman behind the policeman spoke.

"It was a shot from one of the windows. Some sort of blob of something... And don't worry, Superboy, it's not Kryptonite." Lois Lane reported.

"Well, she should know..." A nearby policeman deadpanned.

"It looks more like solidified... Well, boogers." Kid Flash shrugged.

"Solid goo?" Conner said, confused, and looked the man over.

"It's not a coating. It's converted him completely into some sort of gemstone."

"Sheesh... So, any idea who it is and what they're shooting?" Bart asked.

"It's the Joker. " Lois, three cops, and another half a dozen reporters said.

"...Oh good. Well, I guess we'd better go find out what he wants..." Conner sighed.

---

The two superheroes raced into STAR Labs, finding a number of startled victims frozen in various materials, all trying to flee the lab. There were some scientists in the strange solid goo-like substance, a few made of silver, and a hapless receptionist at the desk was frozen solid. A freeze gun still labelled as evidence and marked as having been used by Mister Freeze was frozen onto her by its barrel, having been fired at point blank range.

"I'm guessing the Joker had more than one toy stolen from the evidence room at Gotham Central.." Bart noted, seeing a few more frozen security guards.

A security camera tape lay beside the subzero secretary, labelled "for Superham", and the two quickly put it in a player.


The scene it depicted was first of The Joker and Harley Quinn entering the labs, each carrying a freeze gun. The guards were first, and the Joker had walked over to the receptionist.

"You're pressing the alarm, right?" He demanded on the tape. She shook her head.

"Bah! That's no fun!"

There was a brief scream, and then laughter.

"Whoops. I'm not used to these things..." The Joker shrugged, taking Harley's freeze ray off her as the harlequin checked.

"She was tellin' the truth, Mister J... Either that or the alarm trigger don't display here."

"This is why I stay in Gotham. People there are so much more fun. They actually defy you... still, while the bat's away, I think it's only nice to give Superham a visit. Now, where would they store the Kryptonite..."

The pair walked away, and the tape them cut to fifteen minutes later. The crowds of fleeing victims passed by, being picked off in small groups, chased by Harley and The Joke, carrying strange new guns that shot out blobs. The pair then walked over, and pressed the Alarm, which blared into life. The pair jumped, then quickly switched it off.

"Haven't these Metropolis Morons heard of SILENT alarms?!" Joker complained, before hitting a button, which seemed to stop the tape.

"Well, that tells us what's going on. Some kind of matter converters?" Bart pondered.

The pair went deeper into the labs, finding more frozen victims, and in one room, another point-blank victim. However, the pair also noted puddles of liquid on the floors.

"I'm guessing that whatever happened to those people won't be any easier to fix if we step in them..." Conner said distastefully.

"Ugh... And what about the ones who mixed together?"

The pair went onwards, minding their step, until they heard a voice. The two raced into an office to find Harley Quinn aiming out the window.

"Darn. Missed her again... Still, they'll need a bucket for that cop!" Harley Quinn giggled.

"Where's The Joker?" Bart demanded.

"Oh... You two. Were are the grown ups?"

"Tell us where The Joker is, Quinn!" Conner said, not rising to her insult.

"I'm sorry, but you need an appointment to speak to Mister J. He's a busy man. Now, if you were Superman and not just Stupidboy, he'd make room... But he ain't got time for brats." She said.

"Well, we'll just find him ourselves..." Bart said, only for Harley to laugh.

"Goo-ed luck!" She said, raising her gun. Conner rushed over and grabbed it.

"Not today." He smirked. She smirked too.

Bart then cried out, and Conner was shocked when he turned around.

"Hi there, Superbrat! Wait, what did you call him earlier?" The Joker asked.

"Stupidboy, puddin'."

"...Hm, I'll stick with mine. Anyway, I bet you're wondering how I snuck up on you and your super-hearing!" Joker cackled.

"What did you do to Kid Flash?" Conner demanded.

Bart Allen had been struck in the back by a beam, and was even now seemingly melting. He was flailing his limbs as he and his costume both turned entirely yellow, and breaking down into a blob.

"I'm not sure. These things are really random... Anyway, I snuck up on you with this little gizmo on my belt! Complete silence bubble around me!" He giggled, and to demonstrate, activated the device and pulled out a massive revolver.

The gun made no noise as the bullets bounced off Conner's chest.

"..." The Joker said.

"Uh, puddin, the gizmo's still on..."

Joker frowned, and then tried to turn it off. Eventually, he managed it.

"There. Anyway, seems your friend is having a goo-d time. Want to join him?"

Conner raced again, seeking to grab the second device, only to feel very strange.

"Ha! I had two of them!" Harley giggled, as Superboy felt much less like a Boy of Steel and more like a Blob of Putty...

He stared at his liquefying hands, as his feet and legs began to melt down. He made a feeble grasp for The Joker as he sank down, turning into a blue blob in mere minutes."

"Well, that was fun... But I guess Superham must be out of town as well. Go fetch a big bucket, we'll put these two together. And then we can try and hit Lois Lane again!"

Harley whooped for joy.

"And once we get her maybe they'll send in some more SWAT guys!"

Joker shrugged.

"Maybe. For all I know we might have melted them all. But go fetch that bucket."

A few moments later, Bart and Conner were less than pleased to be sharing a rather cramped space, especially since as blobs of goo, neither were very fast or powerful.

'You had to wonder about people mixing together...' Conner grouched.

'Hey, I didn't miss she had two guns!' Bart shot back, as the pair heard groans of frustration.

"Where did that damn reporter learn to dodge?!" Joker complained, as he turned a reporter from the wrong newspaper into a goopy brown substance...