EXPERIMENTATION
ACT 1, SCENE 1
[The setting is a large house. As the camera focuses in through the window, we see two twelve-year-old children, one male and one female, watching TV. The children are in the living room of an upper-middle class house. There is a nice couch up against the wall on the right side of the children and there are a couple of chairs behind them with an end table in between. The children are in the middle of the floor watching the television that is in the far left-hand corner of the room. Both children are wearing shorts and tee shirts and are barefoot. The boy is sitting up eating a bowl of cereal. The girl is lying on her stomach next to and slightly in front of the boy with her feet in the air. We see that she has already finished her bowl of cereal and the empty bowl is lying next to her. It is a Saturday night and it would appear that the two kids are the only ones at home. A David Copperfield magic special is on TV. We see that he is currently performing the “Saw a Woman in Half” illusion. As the woman on TV is restored to her natural shape, the girl turns to the boy.]
LINDSAY
“Do you want to play magician?”
[The boy doesn’t look away from the television.]
RYAN
“What?”
LINDSAY
“I said, do you want to play magician. You’ll be the magician and I’ll be the beautiful assistant.”
[Ryan finally looks at Lindsay and shrugs]
RYAN
“Okay. But what will we do?”
[Lindsay, now a little annoyed that she has to explain everything to Ryan]
LINDSAY
“You can saw me in half. Like that guy on TV just did to his assistant.”
[Ryan looks interested, but then looks a little puzzled]
RYAN
“But we don’t have a box like he does to put you in.”
LINDSAY
“My mom just bought some new curtain rods and she has the box in the basement. I’m a little
taller than the box and we can cut out a hole for my head and my feet. And we can cut
out the sides so that the audience can see my arms and legs.”
[Again, Ryan looks puzzled. It would appear that Ryan isn’t that much interested
in doing something that resembles ‘playing house’. At another time, we might see
Ryan playing soldier with his friends or catching frogs.]
RYAN
“You want me to cut you in half when you’re in a cardboard box? Won’t your mom
be mad that we ruined her box?
[Lindsay is looking a bit ‘put out’. Especially since he seems more concerned about a box instead of her well being. To convince Ryan, she adopts a superior attitude.]
LINDSAY
“Mom won’t care about some stupid box. Just quit being a baby about it and do it. Besides,
the show is over and there’s nothing on TV now.”
[Ryan looks up and sees that the credits are rolling. In a side window, the local
anchor-woman tells about the headlines on the local news show that is “Coming up next!”
Ryan appears to give in to his fate.]
RYAN
“Okay. Where’s the box and the saw?”
[Lindsay has a look of triumph on her face. She stands up and picks up her empty cereal bowl.]
LINDSAY
“The box is downstairs on the floor of the storeroom. The saw is on dad’s bench. You’ll see ‘em.”
[Ryan stands up and gets his bowl. As he passes Lindsay, she gives him her bowl and spoon. The camera follows the pair to the kitchen. He begins moving to the basement stairs after he has put the bowls in the sink when he sees that Lindsay isn’t following him.]
RYAN
“Where are you going? I thought you were going to help me.”
[Lindsay turns to Ryan and smiles]
LINDSAY
“I have to get changed for the act. The assistant on TV wasn’t wearing a tee-shirt, was she?”
[Ryan shrugs and starts down the stairs. The camera stays in the kitchen while Lindsay waits for Ryan’s reply. His voice fades as he descends the stairs.]
RYAN
“Whatever. I hope this box isn’t heavy. I might drop it and then we won’t have to do your stupid trick.”
[Lindsay looks angry after this remark.]
LINDSAY
“You better not break that box, Ryan, or you can’t come over any more! I’ll make mom send you home!”
[With the proper rebuttal in place, she turns and goes to her room and closes the door.]
[We have returned to the living room. The room is the same except that the television is on what appears to be MTV, but is muted. There is a four-foot long cardboard box in the middle of the floor. The box has only a few markings on it reading “Fragile” and “This end up”. The box has holes cut in the side for viewing access and there is a black dotted line to the left of the center of the box. The line was obviously added by a black magic marker. Unlike most stage magician boxes, Lindsay has cut this box so that both sides are viewable instead of just the right. Next to the box are a ‘Craftsman’ wood saw and two flat metal cookie sheets. Lindsay is at the “head” of the box cutting a hole in the end with a pair of scissors. She is wearing a blue two-piece bikini that is a little too large for her but is tied tight enough not to slip off. Ryan hasn’t changed clothes. He is sitting on the floor next to the box watching Lindsay work.]
LINDSAY
“There, that should be big enough for my head. What do you think?”
[Ryan looks Lindsay straight in the eye and smirks]
RYAN
“I think you got a big head. You should make the hole a LOT bigger.”
[Lindsay has stood up. She crosses her arms and stomps her foot]
LINDSAY
“You just me nice to me, Ryan Engleman! I’ll tell mom that you ate all of the cereal.”
[Ryan is perturbed by her lie]
RYAN
“I didn’t eat it all! You had a bigger bowl than I did.”
LINDSAY
“So, you took the last of it.”
[Ryan gets up and walks over to a chair]
RYAN
“So, you can do your stupid trick yourself. I’m busy.”
[Ryan has sat down in the right hand chair. He has picked up a ‘TV Guide’ and is reading it. Lindsay realizes that she has gone too far and begins to plead with Ryan.]
LINDSAY
“I was just kidding! I won’t tell mom that you ate the cereal.”
[Ryan is still ignoring her. It seems that the main story is about ‘Sabrina’. Melissa Joan Hart is on the cover.]
LINDSAY
”C’mon! I really want to do this. Don’t ruin it for me!”
[Lindsay looks at Ryan and considers something]
LINDSAY
“I’ll pay you.”
[This gets Ryan’s attention. He looks up from the magazine]
RYAN
“How much?”
LINDSAY
“I’ve got a dollar.”
[Ryan doesn’t hesitate]
RYAN
“A dollar plus your new Sosa card.”
[Lindsay is shocked at how steep the price suddenly got]
LINDSAY
“I just got that card today! I’ll give you five dollars.”
RYAN
“You don’t have five dollars. You spent it today at the card shop with me. Gimme Sosa or I won’t play.”
[Lindsay knows she is beat and resignedly says…]
LINDSAY
“Okay. Now will you be the magician?”
[Ryan stands up]
RYAN
“Okay. But you owe me that card when we’re done.”
[Lindsay turns around and moves quickly to the box. She begins her introduction of Ryan.]
LINDSAY
“Ladies and gentlemen! I present to you the Great Ryano!”
[Lindsay applauds and whistles as Ryan walks up to the box. Ryan walks up to Lindsay at a leisurely pace. He still doesn’t appear to be excited about playing magician.]
RYAN
“Now what do I do?”
LINDSAY
“Open the box so I can lay down in it, dummy.”
[Ryan gives Lindsay a look and then bends over and opens up the flaps on the box. Lindsay steps in and sits down inside.]
LINDSAY
“Help me with my feet. I don’t want to tear the box.”
[Close-up of Lindsay’s feet. We see her toes sticking through the holes in the end of the box. We see Ryan grab ahold of Lindsay’s right foot and pull it through the hole until her heel pops out. Ryan repeats with her left foot.]
RYAN
“What should I do now?”
LINDSAY
“Help me get my head through. I can’t see where I’m going.”
RYAN
“Okay”
[Ryan leans down at the head of the box. We see as he guides her head that Ryan was right earlier. Ryan has to bend some of the cardboard back so that Lindsay can get her nose and chin through. Her head fits, but just barely. Ryan smirks as Lindsay finally gets her head through the opening. Lindsay has her arms though the side openings and has helped with the procedure as much, or as little, as she could. Ryan then closes the flaps on the cardboard box, finishing the task. As the camera pans back, all we can see of Lindsay is her head, her feet, ankles and calves and her arms. Some light from the lamp allows us to see her legs through the opening in the side of the box along with her stomach in the upper opening. Lindsay has rested her hands on the top of the box just over her chest.]
RYAN
“So should I just cut you in half now?”
LINDSAY
“I guess so. That’s what that Copperfields guy did.”
[Ryan picks up the saw and looks at it. It seems that some second thoughts are going through his mind now. He sets the saw blade against the box, along the dotted line of course, and then turns to Lindsay.]
RYAN
“Are you sure you still want to do this? I don’t want to get in trouble with your mom.”
LINDSAY
“If it hurts, I’ll tell you to stop. I won’t tell mom if you hurt me.”
[Ryan still looks uncertain. But he turns to the saw anyway and draws it back. The saw begins to cut into the cardboard.]
RYAN
“Well, if you’re sure.”
[Ryan begins to cut the box with the saw. A little tentatively at first, but then with a little vigor. While he is sawing, the camera moves back and down so that the view is about even with the box. We can see the entire box and it is obvious that Lindsay hasn’t pulled back to be out of the way of the saw. Both her head and her feet are in their original positions. As he reaches about midway through the box, it is obvious to the camera that Ryan has begun to pass the saw through Lindsay’s body. About this time we hear Lindsay gasp. Ryan stops immediately, but he leaves the saw in the cut he has made.]
RYAN
“What?! Are you okay?”
LINDSAY
“I’m fine. It just tickles a little. Keep going! This is so cool!”
RYAN
“If you really want me to.”
[Ryan turns back to the blade. He continues sawing without interruption until he reaches the bottom of the box. We can see that the saw has passed completely through Lindsay’s waist without any obvious pain or discomfort. We notice that Lindsay’s feet are still moving.]
LINDSAY
“Cool! I can’t wait to tell Sally about this. Okay, put those cookie sheets in the cut so you can pull me apart.”
[Ryan complies with her request. He first removes the saw and then slides the cookie sheets down into the groove made by the saw, fully separating Lindsay from her lower half.]
LINDSAY
“This is so wild!”
RYAN
“Yeah, I didn’t think it would work. You ready for me to pull you apart?”
[Ryan is now at by Lindsay’s head. He has his hands on the box in preparation to pull the two halves apart]
LINDSAY
“Yeah, I’m ready! It’s part of the show, isn’t it?”
[Ryan takes a deep breath. He then pulls the top portion of the box away from the bottom, leaving Lindsay’s legs and feet behind. Ryan has pulled the box about a foot when the cookie sheet catches on the carpet and falls off.]
RYAN
“Ohmygod!”
LINDSAY
“What? What happened?”
[Ryan looks down at her]
RYAN
“You mean you can’t feel it?”
LINDSAY
“Feel what?”
RYAN
“The sheet fell off of the box. You sure you’re okay?”
[Lindsay looks a little panicked]
LINDSAY
“The sheet fell off?! But, that didn’t happen on the show!”
RYAN
“You want me to check and see if you’re okay?”
LINDSAY
“I guess you better. You don’t see any blood do you?”
RYAN
“I don’t see any. Let me go check.”
[Ryan slowly lets go of the box and starts to move to the opposite end of the box. As the camera follows, we see Ryan react to what he sees at the end of the box. The camera follows behind him and finally reveals what has happened to Lindsay. We see contained within the box is a flesh colored stump. There is no blood or gore on the stump or the box.]
RYAN
“This is wild! Lindsay, can you feel this?”
[Ryan touches the stump with his right hand]
LINDSAY
“What are you doing? That feels weird.”
RYAN
“I’m touching your stump. Does this feel weird too?”
[Ryan begins tickling the base of Lindsay’s torso.]
LINDSAY
“It kinda tickles, but it still just feels weird. Like I’ve never been touched there before.”
RYAN
“You’ve never had a here before. You want to take a look?”
LINDSAY
“How can I take a look? I’m in this box.”
RYAN
“Well, get out of the box, stupid.”
LINDSAY
“The assistant didn’t get out of the box on TV. You’re sure I can get out?”
RYAN
“The blade didn’t fall off on TV either. I’m pretty sure its okay.”
[Ryan has stood up. At this point, Ryan opens up the flaps on the box that Lindsay’s torso is in. We see that Lindsay’s body now ends about three inches below her belly button. Everything else about her seems normal. Lindsay is now struggling with getting her head out from the hole in the box.]
LINDSAY
“Could you help me get out of this thing?”
RYAN
“I told you to make the hole bigger.”
LINDSAY
“Shut up, Ryan! Just help me out.”
[Ryan bends over and pulls on the cardboard so that Lindsay doesn’t break her nose trying to get out. In a moment, her head is out and Ryan pulls the box away from Lindsay. Lindsay looks down at her stomach and then begins to feel the stump where her waist was.]
LINDSAY
“This is cool. I didn’t know I could get out of the box like this.”
[As Lindsay continues to inspect herself, Ryan has walked over to the other box containing the lower half of Lindsay. He sits down next to her feet and contemplates them for a moment. As he looks at them, we notice a little bit of movement from her toes.]
RYAN
“Do these still work okay?”
[Ryan looks up at Lindsay as he takes his right index finger up the sole of her foot. Lindsay’s top half jumps and she lets out a yelp.]
LINDSAY
“Ryan! Leave my feet alone! You know they’re ticklish!”
[Ryan has a devilish grin on his face]
RYAN
“I’m just checking to see if all of you still worked.”
LINDSAY
“Well, I could feel you do that, so I guess my legs still work. Now leave my feet alone!”
RYAN
“Are you going to hop over here and make me?”
[Ryan positions himself so that his hands are on both of Lindsay’s feet. After about a half second of suspense, Ryan digs into the soles of Lindsay’s feet. The feet begin wiggling wildly and the box that holds them starts shaking as Lindsay’s legs start to beat around on the inside of the box. Lindsay’s top half falls over itself trying to get closer to Ryan to make him stop. Lindsay is laughing hysterically the whole time. After about a minute of torture, Ryan has to stop because Lindsay was able to pull her feet from the cardboard stocks. Lindsay’s top half has about made it to Ryan and she stops advancing when he stops tickling her feet. Lindsay just collapses and tries to catch her breath. During this time, the shaking of the lower box has caused the other cookie sheet to fall off and one of the flaps on the box has been kicked open by her legs.]
LINDSAY
“What did you do that for?”
RYAN
“I just wanted to see if all of you still worked. I guess it does.”
LINDSAY
“You could have just asked me to move them!”
RYAN
“But that wouldn’t have been any fun!”
[Lindsay moves a little closer to Ryan and then hits his leg.]
LINDSAY
“There. Now, go on and get my legs out of the box. I want to see them. And don’t touch my feet!”
RYAN
“If that’s what you want.”
[Ryan stands up. He bends over to grab the foot end of the box. Ryan then picks up the end of the box and unceremoniously dumps Lindsay’s lower half on the ground. It lands butt up.]
LINDSAY
“Ouch! Dammit, Ryan! Not like that, that hurt!”
RYAN
“I didn’t touch you, just like you asked me to.”
[Ryan puts the box next to it’s other half up against the wall.]
LINDSAY
“I said don’t touch my feet! You could have just pulled on my hips.”
RYAN
“But that wouldn’t be any fun.”
[Ryan sits down next to Lindsay and looks at the stump that caps off her hips. Lindsay follows his concentration. She sets herself up on her stump and then reaches forward and feels the new skin on the top of her separated hips.]
LINDSAY
“This is so weird feeling. It feels like skin, but I can feel my fingers touching the inside of my tummy.”
RYAN
“You mean like someone is touching your guts?”
[Lindsay scrunches her forehead and thinks about it]
LINDSAY
“I guess so. But no one has ever touched my guts before, so I don’t know how that would feel.”
RYAN
“So what do we do now? Should I put you back together?”
LINDSAY
“No, I kind’a like it. Don’t put me back together until mom comes home tomorrow night. I want to show Sally this. Maybe you could cut her in half too.”
RYAN
“Sally’s to girly. She wouldn’t like it. I’d bet she’d cry.”
[Ryan thinks for a moment. Lindsay seems to have lost interest in her legs and is now checking her fingernail polish.]
RYAN
“I wonder if we can do more than just cut you in half?”
LINDSAY
“What do you mean?”
RYAN
“Well, that magician guy also did that one where he cut the box with the girl in it into a bunch of pieces. I was thinkin’ that I could, like, cut your legs off or something.”
[Lindsay furrows her brow at Ryan and then her face suddenly lights up]
LINDSAY
“Yeah! I want to try it. Gimme the saw.”
RYAN
“But I’m the magician. The assistant doesn’t cut herself in half. I get to do it.”
[Lindsay looks like she is about to object, it is her house and her legs after all, but then realizes that Ryan is right.]
LINDSAY
“Fine then. Just be careful with my legs.”
[Lindsay pulls herself back from her legs so that she has a better view of what is going to happen. Ryan reaches over for the saw and picks it up. He then stops and looks at Lindsay.]
RYAN
“ Why don’t you sit in the chair and watch? You can be the audience and the assistant at the same time.”
LINDSAY
“Okay. Help me up into the chair.”
[Ryan stands up and goes over to Lindsay. He gets his hands under her arms and picks her up and sets her in the chair closest to her legs. Ryan then goes back to her legs and turns them so that they are positioned for Lindsay to have a good angle on the performance. Ryan leaves them ‘face-down’]
RYAN
“Ladies and gentlemen, I am the Great Ryano. Tonight, I will saw this woman’s legs in half.”
[Ryan kneels behind Lindsay’s legs and sets the saw blade in the hollows of her knees. Ryan looks up at Lindsay. Lindsay is staring closely at her knees now. Ryan looks back down and draws the blade back. The saw sinks into her legs without blood or pain. Ryan pulls on the blade four times and Lindsay is now in four unequal pieces. Ryan removes the blade and pulls her hips away to show that her legs have been cut in half.]
RYAN
“Ta-da!”
[Lindsay claps and whistles.]
RYAN
“Thank you. But, we are not done yet. Watch me as I cut her legs up even further.”
[There is no objection from Lindsay. Ryan places the saw just below Lindsay’s butt where her legs join her waist. With a few strokes, Lindsay’s legs are now separated from her hips. Once again, Lindsay claps and whistles.]
RYAN
“Thank you. Now for my last cut.”
[Ryan goes down to Lindsay’s calves and places the blade on her ankles. Again, it only takes a few short strokes to remove Lindsay’s feet from her legs. After Ryan is finished, he steps back to look at two feet, two calves, two thighs and a blue bikini covered butt. Lindsay is cheering.]
RYAN
“Would the audience like to see if the feet are real?”
LINDSAY
“Of course, they’re my feet!”
[Ryan picks up Lindsay’s feet and brings them to her. Lindsay takes both feet in her hands and looks closely at them. After a moment the toes wiggle and flex.]
LINDSAY
“Neat! I have got to tell Sally about this.”
[Lindsay stops talking and ponders her toes for a second.]
LINDSAY
“Hey, it would be real easy to do my toes now. I could just set them here
[She sets her feet on the arm of the overstuffed chair that she is resting in]
“And I could paint my toenails like I would paint Sally’s.”
RYAN
“You mean you paint Sally’s toenails for her?”
LINDSAY
“Well, she paints mine too so its fair. It’s a lot easier to paint someone else’s toes because then you don’t have to scrunch up your legs and everything.”
RYAN
“But I thought it was easy for you since you can but your feet behind your head.”
LINDSAY
“Well, it’s easier I guess, but not as easy to reach them as this. Carry me piggy back to the bathroom so I can get my nail polish.”
[Ryan turns around and bends over in front of Lindsay’s chair. Lindsay leans forward and puts her arms around Ryan’s neck. As Ryan stands up, we again see that Lindsay ends at the waist.]
RYAN
“Can you hold on okay with just your arms?”
LINDSAY
“I think so. Don’t bounce around or anything and I should be fine.”
[Ryan and Lindsay exit the room leaving behind Lindsay’s dissected lower half. We see her feet are still on the armrest, her legs are piled together on the floor and her hips are lying next to them. A careful observer would also note that one of the strings that holds the bikini bottom has slipped ‘up’ so that it is now in the previously impossible position of over the flat spot where her stomach used to be.]
[We return to the living room a few minutes after the two had returned to the room. Lindsay is back in the chair. She is simultaneously talking on a cordless phone and painting the nails of her disembodied feet. As she finishes a nail, she picks up the foot and blows on the wet polish and then sets it back down on the armrest. Ryan is sitting on the floor with his back up against the other chair. He is holding the saw in his lap and tiredly looking at whatever is on TV.]
LINDSAY
“…well, I don’t care if you think its weird. I like it. … Well don’t come over then. Bye.”
[Lindsay presses the disconnect button on the handset and sets the phone on the end-table.]
LINDSAY
“You were right. Sally is too much of a wuss to even come and look. She thinks that its weird and that you won’t be able to put me back together. I told her that she’s wrong and that you could cut me all to pieces and that it wouldn’t hurt and that I didn’t want to be put back together until I’m ready.” A pause. “When mom gets home.”
RYAN
“So what do you want to do?”
[Ryan is looking sleepy. A wall clock says its 11:10.]
LINDSAY
“I just want to prove Sally wrong. She thinks she so smart.”
[Lindsay pauses for a moment as she mulls over how to prove that she is right.]
LINDSAY
“Help me down.”
[Ryan gets up and helps Lindsay down to the floor. Lindsay ‘walks’ herself over to her legs using her arms. She looks at her hips for a moment and then lies down on her back.]
LINDSAY
“Put me back together. The magician could so you can too.”
RYAN
“Shouldn’t you be back in the box? The magic man on TV never took his assistant out so you should be back in the box to get put back together.”
[The look on Lindsay’s face quickly shows that she can’t believe the Ryan thought of that first, but she quickly remedies that by telling Ryan:]
LINDSAY
“Well get that box over here and help me get back in it!”
RYAN
“Okay, okay. Just don’t get too snippy with me or I won’t do it.”
[Ryan gets the boxes and the ‘blades’ and returns to Lindsay. Ryan helps Lindsay’s top half get into the box.]
LINDSAY
“You better get me back together or you’ll be in big trouble with mom!”
RYAN
“No problem, Lizard. I’ll put you back together.”
LINDSAY
“Don’t call me that! You know I hate it!”
[Ryan has Lindsay’s top half in her box and is arranging her legs in the bottom half. When he has her legs and hips aligned right, he attempts to put her feet in the proper holes.]
RYAN
“Uh, Lindsay?”
LINDSAY
“What?”
RYAN
“I can’t get your feet to stay on.”
LINDSAY
[Sounding a little panicked] “Ryan, don’t joke about that. Put my legs back on now.”
RYAN
“But…”
LINDSAY
“Pull the blades out of the box and get me out of this thing so that I prove it to Sally!”
[Ryan pauses at Lindsay’s reaction. He kind of shrugs and sets Lindsay’s feet at the end of the box.]
RYAN
“Okay then…”
[Ryan reaches over and extracts the ‘blades’ from the box. As soon as he has done this, Lindsay pops the box open and sets up.]
LINDSAY
“Oh my God, why didn’t you do it right Ryan?”
[Lindsay picks up something out of the box and we see that she is holding a thigh.]
RYAN
“I told you it wasn’t working right! You never listen to me.”
[Lindsay looks a bit frightened now. She has pulled her torso out of the box. We can see that her hips have properly reattached themselves to Lindsay’s body, but her legs are not attached.]
LINDSAY
“Its not funny Ryan! Put my legs back together right now!”
RYAN
“I don’t know how. I didn’t use the cookie sheets on your legs, I just cut them.”
[Lindsay has pulled all of the parts of her legs out of the lower box and has picked up her feet. She forcefully hands them to Ryan.]
LINDSAY
“Well find out how. I can’t go to school like this!”
[Ryan is looking at the dismembered legs and the pair of feet that he is holding. At that moment we hear a door open and close and a female voice yell:]
MOM
“Hey kids, I’m home!”
[Mom walks into the living room where Lindsay and Ryan are. She stops and notices what has happened to her daughter and drops her purse.]
MOM
“What have you two done….?”
[Ryan is still holding Lindsay’s feet. He turns to Lindsay and says:]
RYAN
“You still owe me that Sosa card ya know.”
END