Author’s note: this is a fan work from the manga/anime series of the same name, and as such is likely subject to out-of-character interpretations, plot inconsistencies, or various other discrepancies in the lore of the series proper.
The scene opens up within Centorea Shianus’s (better known as Cerea) room, a fairly spacious well kept living space. It was VERY Japanese in theming, given the sliding door and tatami mats littered about.
“Hah! Fshah! Hyah!”
Said dame was a centaur with long blonde hair wrapped in a ponytail wearing both a white dress shirt up top, and a navy blue dress sheet down below.
“Tsh! Phyah! Nyoh!”
A ruby red ribbon lay on her bountiful chest, which was bouncing vigorously due to the force of the horse’s training.
“Mmph! Hmph!”
*wham!*
“HEY SARA, WHAT ARE YOU DOING?”
“Hiy-AHHHHH! PAPI! Try not to enter my abode with such reckless abandon!”
“Ah, come on Sara! How was Papi supposed to know that you were swinging your sword like a loony bird?”
Entering the space was a harpy simply known as Papi. An appropriately idiotic cowlick sprung up from her short tussled sky-blue hair. Beneath her head she also wore a black tank top which covered her lack of breasts, but to compensate tan booty shorts accentuated her shapely thighs, looking tasty enough to eat. Finally, her arms were feathered wings, and her legs bird-like talons.
“Surely you would have heard me working out? Even someone as grey matter challenged as you should notice!”
“Calm down, Sara! It’s not Papi’s fault she doesn’t have pointy horsie ears like you that pick up on every noise in the house!”
“Far be it for me to police how a roommate should act in their own home…regardless, what brings you here?”
“Uhhh, what was it again…? Hmm…”
“(Oh bother, here we go again…)”
A distinctive trait of harpies aside from their flight capabilities was their tendency to forget even the most critical info after taking three steps. As such, handling one without either a vast amount of patience or empathy and retaliating would be grounds for discrimination as per the Interspecies Exchange Bill enacted a few years back.
“Mmm…don’t tell Papi! She knows the answer!”
“I have no clue what it is that’s taxing your mind in the first place, so rest assured I won’t interrupt.”
“…hrrrmmmppphhh…AH! PAPI REMEMBERS!!! She’ll pick them up from downstairs first!”
“(Perhaps I should tag along this time so that I see with my own eyes what's the big deal.)”
Resting her sword in her ceremonial sheath, the floor-bound mare and the one in the air made their way to the first floor of the house.
“Papi saw the mailman today, and they gave her some letters! It was kind of tough to carry them with just her wings though…”
“You know, you can always ask for help.”
“And Papi would have! But everyone else is either outside doing boring work or going shopping.”
The bluebird miffed aloud.
“Anyways…Sara, look!”
“Hmm? On the kitchen counter? And stop calling me Sara!”
“Sorry…”
Ignoring the incorrect naming for now, Cerea peered at the envelopes carefully. What caught her eyes was the one labelled from-
“…mother!”
On Cerea’s letter was the following:
“To my dearest daughter,
I do hope you are boding well since our last battle. Your mother has grown quite weary from constant jousting and will be taking a leave of absence to visit you. If you haven’t been polishing your own skills at an acceptable level, I WILL know. I plan on seeing you as per one week of this letter’s arrival.
Prepare accordingly, Centorea.
--Signed, Mrs. Shianus ”
“…Papi.”
“Yes?”
“What day is today?”
“Oh! Papi knows that much! It’s Saturday!”
“And when was this letter delivered?”
“Hmm…it says Sunday at the top of the letter.”
“YOU DO REALIZE THAT THIS MEANS SHE’LL BE HERE TOMORROW, CORRECT?!?”
“Uwaaahhh! Papi’s super-duper sorry about that! She only remembered just now cause Papi got one from her mommy too!”
The troublesome tweeter pointed to another envelope on the counter.
This one had the following written on it:
“ ~~Hi pAPi~~
~~m0mm~~w4n7s~~s4y~~h3ll0~~
~~fr0m pApi’s m0mm”
The rest of the letter was indecipherable.
“How can you even understand what it says? It’s all literal chicken-scratch on here!”
“Well, Papi still has the one from last time hidden away in her ‘important things’ cubby...she saw they looked the same even with funny words.”
“Right, wings WOULD make it hard to write properly…still, we can assume she’ll be here shortly as well.”
Cerea then made quick work of packaging the two envelopes together once more.
“Seems as though we’ve gotten ourselves into a major conundrum, eh Papi?”
The winged girl could only look down at her feet.
“…err, what ails your mind at the moment?”
“…Papi’s not sure that she can face her mommy again. Hubby’s made less efforts to hang out lately cause you’ve been busy keeping him to yourself…”
“(Uh oh! Emotional distress! My noble self isn’t so adept at handling things like these with anything less than a blunt edge!)”
“…right…Milord HAS accompanied me on many outings due to all the new centaur species popping up.”
That much was true. From unicorns, to dairy centaurs, to even a Pegasus, it was a really hectic time for the equine.
“See! Sara said it herself!”
“But it’s not like I necessarily WANT to be involved every time! Usually Milord gets forced into various wacky situations and requires my help!”
“Oh yeah? Well, Papi wants some action too! If Papi’s mommy sees you and Hubby hugging and kissing each other, she’ll flip the bird at me!”
“Wait, your wings are capable of throwing the middle finger, er, talon, up?”
“Nuh uh! ...Come to think of it, they’re the reason Papi hasn’t been able to do anything at all! She can’t pick up things, or write letters, or even touch Hubby without hurting him!”
“Come off it, Papi. Your wings are very warm and soft, they’re more than able to comfort Milord.”
“That doesn’t mean much coming from someone with fingies and working arms! Papi bets you could do soooo much more than she ever could!”
“Cease your attitude, Papi! At least you don’t have high expectations to live up to like I do! The reason for my constant training and somewhat distant tone is only due to how I was raised. Without mother in my life I’d have no semblance of morals!”
“So Sara’s ‘orals’ made her a stuck-up weirdo?”
“WHAT?!? Who’re you calling a weirdo? And it’s ‘morals’, you birdbrain!”
“Papi is, you space-taking meaniehead!”
“How DARE you!!! You’d NEVER be able to live a day as me if you knew just how much pressure I’m under to keep appearances up in front of everybody I know!”
“What fresh-sure? Sara’s got an awesome body that Hubby can ride anywhere he likes, she’s not stupid in her brain, and people treat her like a big girl cause of her huge jiggly boobies! Papi thinks that Sara couldn’t be her for a day either!”
“…GRRRRR!!!...FOR THE LAST TIME, STOP CALLING ME SARA!”
“…RRRGGGHHH!!!...AND YOU STOP STEALING HUBBY FROM ME!”
*slam!*
“Hey Papi, hey Cerea, we’re home!”
“……”
“……”
“…did I come in at a bad time?”
“Not at all, Milord! We’re peachy keen! Harumph!”
“Papi has no pro! Hmph!”
“Okay then…well I have some groceries here if anyone’s interested in unpacking them for me.”
The conflicting duo brushed the homeowner’s request aside, the both of them too steamed to do much of anything productive.
“…oh well, more for me!”
The rest of the evening proceeded without note, save a few awkward glances at the dinner table due to the strained atmosphere.
Things were about to get a whole lot worse by tomorrow though…
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
THE NEXT MORNING…
“Mmmm, Papi feels really cold all of a sudden…wait...what happened to Papi’s wings?”
Typically, she would fall asleep face first into them as they kept her body temperature from dropping below a certain point.
“Why don’t they have any feathers on them? Did she wish hard enough to grow fingies like Sara?”
Observing her digits carefully, her eyes went down her forearm bit by bit, until…
“Eh?”
A veritable valley of visible cleavage had made itself an apparent vista from the harpy’s point of view.
“It seems like Papi’s boobies got really big too! And…are these Sara’s clothes…? Ah! Maybe she played a prank on Papi by stuffing her chest like a turkey! That silly horsie! Papi should fly on down to Sara’s room and prank her back! Hup! Woah!”
Attempting to fly only made the ditz fall over onto her childish face.
“Ouch! That’s weird…Papi should be able to fly…let’s stand up and try again…hnnn!! Hnngghh!!”
It was no use.
“*huff* *huff* …something’s not right…she isn’t USUALLY this heavy, r-right…?”
Now that her body’s nerves woke up a bit, Papi felt a disturbance as she twisted her head around and peered at her lower half.
“Wh-Wh-What’s going on…?”
A brown backside beckoned to the bluebird.
“Why are Papi’s legs now a horsie’s?!?”
Her tail swished back and forth frantically in response, a foreign sensation to the usually tail featherless chirper.
“HYYAAAAGGGGHHHH!!!”
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
AT THE SAME TIME…
“Ahn~ Waking up early in the morning like this is the best!”
Cerea rubbed her sleepy eyes, feeling more chipper than ever as she raised herself to an upright position.
“…huh? Where did these feathers come from?”
No wonder she had slept so well, anyone would when you had wings for arms. And speaking of what she saw below that…
“…WHAT…! Where did my breasts go?!?”
The mare touched her upper body in a panic. Her heart beating out of her now much smaller chest, Cerea squinted her gaze down towards the floor. (A feat that for a centaur never would have happened past a fairly early age from a puberty perspective.)
“I’ve even gotten bird legs!!”
By now, the equine had goosebumps. Or perhaps it was more accurate to say that she had harpybumps, given her feet were in the shape of a particular three-toed avian.
“AAAAAHHHHH!!!”
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
“PAPI! ARE YOU IN THERE? ANSWER ME!!”
The former horse was able to run upstairs with less issue than expected in spite of only having half her standard leg count.
“ *sniff* Papi is in her room, but she can’t get up…”
“(Don’t tell me…!)”
Gently opening the door as best she could with her wing nubs, Cerea’s heart dropped aghast at the sight.
“Sara…*sniff* please help Papi! She doesn’t know how to work horsie legs, and this prank is going too far!!”
“Prank? DOES THIS LOOK LIKE A PRANK TO YOU?!?”
The two then pensively eyed each other up in abject horror.
“Hold on…why does Sara have Papi’s body…!”
“I could ask the same for you!”
“Papi…woke up like this…”
“S-So did I…”
Cerea silently grabbed her old hands in contemplation while hoisting Papi up with her new winged arms.
“Hnngghh! Haarrgghh! Come on, Papi! Help me out here!”
“She’s trying her best! Hwah!”
“Hey, be careful-”
Too late. The duo stumbled to the ground in a mess.
*smoosh!*
“…Papi’s sense of gravity is all off from how huge her boobies are…”
“Mmph Hmmph. Eumph Seemph. (Mhm. I see.)”
With Papi’s tits smothering Cerea’s face, she could do nothing but despair at how ironic it was to be defeated by what was once her own gigantic breasts. This went on for a while, until finally…
“Do you have the hang of it now?”
“…!!!...Hooray! Papi did it all by herself! Now she can jump for joy!”
*STOMP!* *CLACK!* *SMACK!*
“CALM DOWN, PAPI!”
“Oops, sorry…she forgot how large and loud she is now.”
“If you’re not cautious, you might even knock yourself out with…your…breasts at some point.”
“Oh, right! Papi guesses that WOULD be the case! She’s never had to deal with that pro before, ahaha!”
Not picking up on Cerea’s grimaced reaction, the harpy-turned-mare tested out walking some more.
“All good!”
“Great to hear, but why did this occur? …is Milord even aware of what’s happened?!?”
*wham!*
“What is all the racket so early in the morni-NGYAAAHHH!!!”
Who else to slither in but Miia the lamia herself, fainting in shock at what her slit-eyes discovered.
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
“…let me get this straight. Somehow, you two…swapped your heads onto each other’s bodies…?!?”
“That seems to be the case, yes.”
“Papi has no clue how!”
The three of them were in the living room debating why the equine and avian looked the way they did.
“What if…Lala used her scythe to switch your souls against your will for fun…!!?”
The snake lady cowered in fear at the thought.
“There is a zero percent chance of that possibility.”
“KYAAAHHH!!! …oh. It’s just you.”
Miia calmed down tremendously and sighed in relief. Popping from basically out of nowhere was the alleged Dullahan in question, her indiscernible stage presence accidentally spooking the group in the process.
“Ahem. In the unlikely borough of judgement where I’d cross their souls with my own two hands, wouldn’t their original neck stumps still be intact without a doubt unto their own sacred vessels?”
“Hmm, you DO bring up a good point.”
Cerea placed a claw under her chin in puzzlement.
“Well if Leela didn’t do this, then who did?”
The harpy squawked in worry as another resident oozed down for breakfast.
“…Papi? My bestest friend…?”
“Suu!”
Papi rushed over to the slime and shook her shoulders aggressively.
“You didn’t swap Sara’s head and Papi’s own for fun, did you?”
“While Suu’s powers are still developing, she doubts that she could do this of her own accord.”
“Oh…oopsie! Sorry to rattle you then, Suu.”
No leads from the bubbling girl either.
“Argh…! This isn’t getting us anywhere! Who else is going to drop in unannounced?!?”
“ *yawn* Oho? So my most relenting opposition has turned into THIS? How amusing~”
“(Great, I just HAD to open my big mouth…)”
Cerea bemoaned as Rachnera the Arachne creaked down from the ceiling and onto the walls. She had made sleeping arrangements the night prior, if her pajamas and six-eyed face mask were to be believed.
“What do you want, Rachnera?”
“Nothing much~ I’m simply wondering how you’re going to make Honey yours with that miniscule body you have now.”
“Hey! Don’t be mean, Ranch! That’s Papi’s body you’re talking about!”
“What do you mean, Papi? Isn’t it your own superior body that’s under your control?”
“Uhhh…Papi thinks so. But it’s also Sara’s body…hmm…”
“Ponder that ownership clause for a bit. In the meantime, I’ve nothing good to say so I’ll just watch from the corner and laugh at the horse’s current predicament.”
“Stop right there, Rachnera! You can’t just butt into this serious conversation without providing some sort of solution!”
The scaly charmer of the group stood up for Cerea. Well, as best as someone without legs could at least.
“Ehhh, it’s still early in the morning! How do we know this isn’t some sort of collective dream, or a hallucination wrought by one of your mom’s weird poisons again? Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m heading back off to my own bed.”
The spider sleepily skittered away quickly, no-selling the accusation prompted to her.
“What ails the keeper of silk so? Did she awaken on the wrong hemisphere of the web?”
Lala inquisitively tilted her head to the side while putting one hand parallel in front of her face, the other out to the edge of her reach.
“…Suu detests that pose and requests you never do it henceforth.”
The liquid lass had both her mood and complexion literally sour over into a sickly green hue based on the unadulterated disgust she felt from the headless horsewoman’s display.
“We’re running low on options here…was this turmoil I’m going through an affront by God himself?”
Cerea clacked her talons back and forth in disdain, the reality of the situation getting to her mentally.
“Somehow I doubt that God, if he DOES exist, would be so petty as to do this sort of thing for kicks.”
Ever the straight man to the horse-bird’s antics, Miia put a hand on her shoulder in reassurance.
“…Miia…I--”
“Salutations, residents of Beloved’s complex!”
“Err, Mero, not to rain on your parade, but you COULD just say ‘Hello’ like a normal person.”
Entering stage left was Mero the mermaid, being pushed in on her wheelchair by the owner of the house himself. Between her aquatic necessities and gaudy outfit needing persistent attention, it was no shock that she was the final member to join in on this cavalcade of creatures.
“Hubby! Papi’s glad to see you! See what she looks like now!”
Striding over to “Hubby”, the man tried his best to keep his eyes at face-level with the bird-turned-mare.
“(Woah…I heard all the racket downstairs and was worried beyond belief…but looking at Papi up close and personal like this really is kind of freaky…)”
“Hehehe! Papi thinks it’s funny that Hubby’s not looking down at her for once!”
“(Only cause if my view goes any lower…!)”
It wouldn’t take a rocket scientist to imagine what would happen if he peeked at Papi’s ‘chicken breasts’.
“Milord…please forgive me for presenting myself to you in such a shameful state…”
“(Cerea…she’s so tiny and fragile now…I’m sure she’s bummed out…how can I console her…?)”
“It’s okay! I don’t know who or what did this to you, but I’ll do my best to accommodate in any way I can. If someone has to experience my right hook capable of blasting people away, then so be it…”
“Milord…I’m not worthy of such niceties.”
“That’s not true! Just because you have someone else’s body doesn’t mean I’d treat you any less like a human being, well, interspecies being in this case. The same goes for Papi as well.”
“Aye, ‘tis be the truth! The Progenitor’s kept to his word almost as if he signed his vows with blood, so I will not allow any further sullying of your esteemed visage!”
“Lala basically admits that there is no fault in the you that you’ve become. Suu also agrees with that sentiment.”
The slime translated the edgy girl’s dialect for those at home.
“I see…I’ll have to reconsider how I can help Milord out the way I am now…thank you very much.”
“You’re welcome, Cerea!”
“Papi’s growing bored! Let’s watch some TV!”
“Now now, Papi-San. I haven’t gotten the opportunity to observe you and Cerea-San for as lengthy of a time as the others have. So you’ll have to forgive me for wanting to inspect the both of you myself.”
The fancy fish then proceeded to compare and contrast the two victims.
“(Hmm…Cerea’s valiant gait being headed by the peppy Papi…and Papi’s lithe form being commandeered by the flustered Cerea…)”
“It’s all…just so…TRAGIC~”
“EARTH TO MERO!! Is that REALLY something you should be saying with a gleeful face?!?“
Miia chastised the watery weirdo and pushed her out of view of the head-swapped girls. Using her newfound fingers, Papi finagled with the TV remote until she hit the power button.
“—thanks for the update, Chris. We come to you live in the streets of XXX City to interview this pair of interspecies woman affected by the recent outbreak.”
“The news channel? Wonder what it is they’re talking about…”
Hubby and the others glued their oculars to the television.
“So tell me Miss, what caused you two to become like this?”
“Why you and everyone else ask so many question?!?”
“Pardon my associate, she’s quite antsy as one may expect.”
As it turned out…
“No way…”
“Hubby! Papi thinks that’s--”
“But yes, it’s clear to anyone with eyes that I, Shianus-San, am shall we say…a little disjointed...”
“Me not think so! Horsie body feels nice~”
“MOTHER?!?”
“MOMMY?!?”
…Papi and Cerea’s moms had also swapped heads with each other!
“Halt the brash language! While we may be friends, I will not allow you to saunter my body around like some classless jester!”
“Is there issue? You not have husband at home to please like I do.”
“WHY YOU…!! If I return from my business trip looking like THIS I’ll be ravaged by those beastly centaur men in horrific and awful ways!”
“Then just stay here? You have daughter like me, yes? Why not see her?”
“What part of BUSINESS. TRIP. are you incapable of comprehending?!? Besides, I’d never be caught dead wearing such tribal attire in front of my kin!”
“Oi, I take offense. Native harpy clothes part of culture. But you may keep as me won’t fit in them no more. Not take genius to figure out why?”
“THAT DOES IT! I’LL SLAY YOU WHERE YOU STAND!!!”
“MAKE ME! YOU BREAK IN ONE KICK FROM NEW HORSIE BODY!!!”
“WE’LL BE CUTTING TO A COMMERCIAL BREAK FOR NOW! STAY TUNED, INTEPRID VIEWERS!!”
*bizzort!*
A dead silence enraptured the living room from all within.
“…nonononoNONONONO!! MOTHER!!!”
“PAPI’S CONFUSED! WHY IS HER MOMMY ALSO HEADY SWAPPIED?!?”
“Calm down, you two! I’m sure there’s some sort of explanation for this!”
“Darling, I love you, but HOW CAN YOU LOGICALLY TELL SOMEONE TO CALM DOWN FROM THIS?!?”
Miia, Papi, and Cerea were all going loco over the news. Was there TRULY no discernible reason?
“Master! Suu checked the Internet! Read what it says!”
“…oh dear. Beloved, this is verifiable tragic news! Worse than the chills of the deep sea ocean even…!”
“…you’ve GOT to be joking…”
Scrolling over the headlines from the major morning outlets, it seemed as though this wasn’t solely a local event…
“ ‘Interspecies Rights Eschewed in Fierce Legal Battle’‘Clothing Donation Lines Filled with Hand-Me-Downs’ ’Centaurs and Harpies Have All Switched Heads’ …what the Hell is going on…?!?”
From the looks of things, the entire planet had the same “head swap-stastrophe” Papi and Cerea did!
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
“ *sigh* So that’s how it is then…what am I-no, every single centaur on Earth going to do now?”
Cerea had dejectedly returned to her room after bringing down her panic levels from a ten to a nine point five.
“I won’t be able to swing a sword with these accursed wings, I can’t have Milord use me as a valid transportation method, and worst of all…”
The blonde peeked into her shirt, reconfirming once more that she was indeed flat as a board.
“…how am I meant to provide prosperous nutrients to the children of Milord and I like this?”
She then lay on her stomach, a tacky sensation due to how awkward a pose like that would be as a centaur for multiple reasons.
*open*
“Suu has arrived.”
“I appreciate your sentimentality, but I’m not in the mood right now.”
“Master sent Suu here to alleviate your worries, as irrevocable to fix as they might seem.”
“Ugh! That’s the exact sort of robotic response I DON’T want or need to hear!”
The equine-turned-avian then tried to shoo the slime away with a wave of her feathery wing.
“Suu knows Papi the best out of all of us. It will take considerable resistance if you think she will simply leave her best friend’s body alone.”
“Well, how do I get you to leave me be then?”
“A feasible proposition. Papi went through the trouble of lending me her favorite attire so that YOU don’t have to go outside in grossly oversized wear. So that will be Suu’s requirement for departure.”
Using her sea-colored tentacles to bring in clothes fit to Cerea’s new frame, the gelatinous girl starting laying them about on her bed.
“Choose something to put on.”
“N-Nonsense! I’ll never wear Papi’s clothes! They don’t represent who I am!”
“Cerea, listen. Suu sincerely hopes you don’t plan to keep the same outfit day in and day out. While SHE lacks a sense of smell, the others will notice after enough time has passed.”
“T-T-Then I’ll go out in my birthday suit! Papi’s body IS kid-like in every shape and form, no one would care!”
“So you’d willingly present yourself nude in retaliation against the reality of your situation, if only to spite your valued comrade’s efforts to please? Think about this logically, Cerea.”
“Guh! You-! It’s-! ARRRGGGHHH!!!”
“Suu’s ear receptors can only handle so much noise. Do not force her to take matters into her own tentacles.”
The ooze blankly stared daggers, her appendages showing malice as translucent as her insides.
“FINE!!! I’LL DO IT!! At least give me the decency to change without someone like you creeping in!”
“Good. That is the answer Suu wished to hear. As someone with her own mimicry abilities, she does sympathize with your unintended transformation. Do not judge her actions to be mean-spirited.”
*close*
Finally getting some privacy, Cerea parsed over the various combos of shirts, shorts, and underwear. Catching her attention was a pair of navy-colored booty shorts, blue striped panties, and green blouse.
“…I suppose it’s not every day I get to try on more freeform garments…”
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
“Mmph…Papi thought this whole pro would be taken care of faster than a flight in the sky, but now every harpy is like her too? Papi’s head hurts…”
The well-proportioned pigeon racked her brain on accepting that this was a crisis of untold potency. Since she could now walk about without forgetting things in three steps like her species was known for, the info overload was too much for the poor birdbrain to handle.
“Bwargh! Papi hates this! Even more bad is that she had to give her clothes away, and all my new ones are way too boring!”
True to her complaints, pretty much every outfit in Cerea’s repertoire consisted of white dress shirts and gigantic plain skirts.
“Papi should tell Sara to live life a little! Or maybe…she only dresses that way cause nothing else can fit her huge boobies?”
She clopped and pranced about, taking note of each jiggle, quake, shake, and plap her tits made.
“…geeze, now Papi’s more aware than ever at how much they stand out…”
*open*
“Hey Papi, I’m here to help.”
“Ah! Ranch! Let Papi come over to you!”
The birdbrain bounded one step too heavily though, as the moment afterwards-
*SPROING!*
*WHACK!*
“FUCK! That hurt like Hell! What WAS that anyways?”
--a couple of buttons had popped and caused both an injury on the spider’s face and wardrobe malfunction, ruining a shirt in the process.
“…Papi doesn’t know.”
Cupping her chest with her hands, they spilled out in all directions and made covering herself up an impossibility.
“Uh huh. Suuuure. You’re lucky whatever it was didn’t go in my eyes!”
“Papi’s sorry! And also…kind of naked…”
“Fortunately for you, I’ve stitched together a few bras that will hopefully wrap around even your ginormous gazongas out of a sense of punishme-I MEAN. 'camraderie'.”
“But Papi hasn’t ever worn a bra before!”
“Ain’t that nice. However, you’re a grown up now whether you like it or not. So big girls like you need to wear them or they’ll face criminal charges on account of public indecency, and that’s a pain in the ass I don’t want to deal with.”
“Ranch, what’s ‘poo-brick and pee-sissy’?”
“…I stand corrected; it’s already a pain in the ass.”
Regardless, Rachnera still presented a wide selection of hand-knitted brassieres to burden the weight of Papi’s new form.
“Well, what do you think? See any you like right off the bat?”
“Hmm, got any fancy ones? Papi wants to be ‘mat-air’ for once.”
“You mean mature? Then let’s try this one.”
Gesturing to a large black bra with flowery patterns at the top of the lace, there was a golden embroidery banded on the perimeter as well.
“Woooah, so cool! Papi really wants to wear it!”
“Great to hear. If you like it so much, then why not put it on right now?”
“…ahehehe…“
“Figures. I’ll help you out this time.”
Grabbing the over the shoulder boulder holder, the arachne walked behind and placed it on Papi’s chest. After securing the nodes and clasps, she stepped back to allow the avian to overlook her handiwork.
“How is it?”
“…so this is the power Sara had…she’s amazing…”
“In awe of something OTHER than my talents, are we? Better get used to them sooner rather than later, cause I won’t always be around to do it for you.”
“You’re the best, Ranch! Papi thanks you so much!”
“…tch! If you’re going out of your way to compliment me so rampantly I guess I could use a few minute’s time to come by once in a while. Just don’t go to any jump rope competitions any time soon, alright?”
“Okay! Even Papi knows how to put on a shirt, so Ranch can say bye bye for now.”
“Sweet. Let me know if you need anything.”
*close*
Now that she was left to her own devices, Papi’s enthusiasm over all the choices she could take advantage of grew exponentially.
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
A couple hours later, it was almost time for both Papi and Cerea’s moms to arrive.
“…oh, Papi…”
“…hi, Sara…”
Running into each other, the two of them once more glanced over their former bodies.
“…you’re looking awfully refined. You do my body well.”
“Papi thinks you chose a great outfit too.”
“Thank you very much. However, now I feel the need to apologize for my horribly limited sense of style.”
“Ah, it’s no pro! Sara couldn’t have possibly known I’d be wearing her clothes.”
“To be fair, no one would ever predict that on a normal day…”
An understanding was forming between the two most physically opposing members of the household.
*knock* *knock* *knock*
Showtime.
“Centorea Shianus! Please allow us entry into your domicile!”
“Pipe down, lady. Papi will open door first.”
*creak*
“…I feared as such. My own daughter, reduced to this paltry state of affairs…”
“Technically I could say the same of you, mother.”
“Wow, Papi. Didn’t know you got so big since I left.”
“Papi didn’t think so either.”
Letting the two matriarchs in, the four of them settled down in the living room.
“Dang, Papi’s lover has nice house and her daughter has nice horsie body like me. You living happy life?”
“Papi guesses…but isn’t this super strange for you, mommy? She’s even bigger than Papi is!”
“It’s no pro. Us harpies now live like horsies, and horsies now live like harpies. World still go in circles.”
“That’s oversimplifying a crucial concern to the balance of nature itself. Wouldn’t you agree, Centorea?”
“…yes, mother.”
Tensions were rising as the mothers ideals conflicted fervently with each other.
“Ahem. You do recall the meaning behind my visit, correct?”
“Yes mother. You were wishing to test my might in the field of combat against you.”
“Precisely. However, as this…contrivance…has occurred, we will need substitutions. Hence why my friend here and your cohort will fight in our place.”
“WHAT?!? Papi’s no good at using her hands, let alone a weapon!”
“Yeah, what all this about? Me never asked for duel between own offspring!”
“SILENCE! If I’m unable to collect proof of any bout between us, my people back home will laugh me straight out of the Colosseum. Why would you have any quandaries regarding our bodies fighting when you’re not the one in control in the first place?”
A jet-black aura of menacing chivalry emanated off Cerea’s mother even WITH being shorter than usual, stunning the other residents.
“S-Still! You can’t order Papi or her mother around like that! What if they get hurt?”
“Fear not. I know myself how sturdy my body can be. And if you’ve been brushing up your own expertise like you claimed, then casualties should be minimal. This is non-negotiable. Have I make myself loud and clear?”
“……….yes, mother.”
Shirking away from the freezingly intense aura, Cerea whispered to her friend.
“(Sorry Papi, but customs are customs. I can’t very well let this matter go, so you and your mother will have to put on a show.)”
“(Ah, come on Sara! You super-duper sure your mommy won’t budge? Not even for a pile of carrots?)”
“(Ooh! You bring up a good point!)”
“(Shh! Papi has an idea in mind!)”
She then faced Cerea’s mother with a look of determination.
“…Papi will do it. However! The loser has to buy the winner a pile of the best, most priciest carrots they can find! Is there no pro?”
“…Hehehe. OHOHOHO! You make me LAUGH, you childish cretin! That’s akin to suggesting bribery! But I was never one to turn down the taste of a thick, long, hard--”
“Cock!”
“WHAT WAS THAT?”
“Pardon. That another name for our species. Just reminding you since you not only veggie eater now.”
“…you harpies truly appall my fortitude so. As for the stakes at hand, I’ll agree to your crass wager!”
And so, the four of them trekked to the track and field in hopes of family honor and rooty veggies alike.
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
“…does Papi really have to wear something so icky?”
“If you are to protect yourself from the fierce offensive power a horse’s body has, then yes. Even though my mother’s body IS being used by yours, that doesn’t make her any less dangerous.”
Gearing up in the preparatory locker room, Cerea was doing her best to acquire battle armor to help out Papi in her upcoming joust. Also, for what it was worth the equine dame tried to teach a few crafty tricks about jousting, much to the oddball bird’s befuddlement.
“Papi won’t mind using your stabby stick and super shell, but will the knight costume do her any good?”
“You mean my lance and shield. As for the regal armaments passed down throughout the family, I can attest to their utmost quality.”
“Okay…if Sara says so…”
After tightening up any loose ends, all that remained was to strut on down to the decisive battlegrounds.
“So you two have made it. I’ll admit, there were far more agreeable circumstances I’d rather fight you in. Still, if even my walnuts-for-brains cohort manages to best your body in battle, then that only concludes you weren’t fit for an affront against me at my prime.”
“Yeesh! Too much talky-talky! More fighty-fighty!”
“My thoughts exactly. Papi, good luck.”
“Papi will do her best! (At least, she HOPES so…)”
Passing each other on the perimeter of the athletic field, Papi and her mother surveyed the landscape from one end to the next. It was your typical high school track and field, rubbery white lines indicating the jogging zones in a circular fashion, a wide-spanning grassy Astro-turf for the roughest of weather conditions, and bleachers on opposite ends for audiences to sit at. And speaking of…
“Go Papi! I know you can do it!”
“You show that funky chicken…horse…mom of yours who’s the BOSS!”
“Suu will provide meaningful applause for your victory.”
“Whoever wins means that defeat shall fall upon the loser for all of time…so tragic~”
“This can’t be any less silly than the last time your bodies fought, clothing damage and all.”
“Thy Valkyries wish to admonish themselves as paragons of war. May the Gods bestow you with the cry of the Heavens!”
…Hubby and the gang were able to make an appearance as the peanut gallery just for Papi!
“Daughter. No hard feelings if lose, yes?”
“…no pro.”
As the skies turned grey, and the winds howled ferociously, there was but a single path laid out to walk.
“BEGIN!!!”
*clop!* *clop!* *clop!*
Galloping across the land, the matriarch magpie took an impending approach to Papi!
“HAH!”
“WAH!”
*clang!*
Raising her shield in fear, the lance jutted off without issue, but not without the impact pushing Papi back a good few meters!
“What is pro of daughter? Me thought you were bird of prey! Why you such coward now?”
“That’s the thing, mommy! Papi WAS a harpy, but now she isn’t! Horsies aren’t known for flying in the air, or swooping down in the wind, or even-”
“HIYAH!”
“YIKES!”
*clang!*
“Enough! Does daughter wish to sit like duck and take on constant jabs? Fight back!”
“……”
Papi wanted to reason with her mother, but there was nothing she could say to change her mind.
*prance!* *prance!* *prance!*
“Good! Let carnage of blood lust fill very body with feeling!”
Forgetting that the combatant’s bodies weren’t even their own, Papi’s mother stood her ground in a defensive position, shield easily deflecting the weak lance of the younger bird.
“Papi! You have to focus on your center of gravity!”
“Sara?!? What’s that mean?”
“It means to not let distractions get in your way!”
“Oh, got it! (Papi still not know! But she HAS to win, or else Sara’s mommy won’t like her anymore!)”
However, the daunting steps of her formerly winged mother loomed in front of her. There was no time to muster up a viable strategy to win!
“SHYAH!”
*clang!*
“UROAH!”
*clang!*
“NYAGH!”
*clang!*
No mercy was being adhered to as the battle waged further onwards, only increasing in tenacity as time progressed.
“ *huff* *huff* DAUGHTER! I ask again, why you not use new body correctly? This way of world now, so use it to fight me!
“(Papi has to find an opening…!)”
“Or does daughter mean to tire me out? Fatter chance than Thanksgiving turkey!”
“(Think! ‘Avoiding distractions’, what is there for Papi to use…?)”
Gripping her lance with more strength, she rushed over to her elder and struck with fury!
*clang!*
“Mph! Not bad, daughter! Finally you take things seriously! But not enough to take me out!”
*whoosh!*
Leaning away from the attack, Papi sat in wait for the right moment to counter…
“(When…? Wait…!)”
*jiggle!*
“(NOW!!!)”
*CLANG!*
“GUH--!!”
“HAAAAAHHHHH!!!”
Gathering every last bit of power in her non-feathery hands and equestrian hooves, Papi propelled her mother halfway across the field with muscle only a horse’s body could summon!
“……”
“(Was that still not enough for Papi to win…?)”
“…cough!”
*plop!*
Falling down from getting the wind knocked out of her, Papi’s mother stumbled to her knees!
“ *hack!* Daughter…very sneaky…how did she do that…?”
“It’s easy enough for even a birdbrain like Papi to figure out! Mommy’s not used to the two heavy bouncing boobies she now has, so when they nearly smacked her in the face it blocked her eyes!”
“So you attacked…during my blind-spot…clever girl…”
*CRASH!*
Fainting from exhaustion, Papi’s mother passed out on the spot! This meant that—
“PAPI IS THE CHAMPION!”
“Yahoo! Congratulations, Papi!”
“Damn, girl! Who knew you were so good at both air AND land fighting? Remind me to be careful around you next time we tussle!”
“Suu’s so happy her body’s composition is turning into tears!”
“Oh dear! If Papi’s best friend melted from sheer ecstasy after she won, it would be too tragic to bear!~”
“Hey hey hey! Don’t say crap like that even as a joke!”
“Ares himself smiled upon your vessel this day! We mortals shall throw a hearty feast to thank ye, lest we forget who forged our victory!”
Celebrations from all the family members were only further encapsulated as the parting rays of sunlight shined through the clouds, ridding the sky of its oppressive pressure.
“Sara, Papi can’t believe it! She won-”
*hug!*
“…hmm?”
“Papi…*sniff*…I’m so very proud of you…thank you so much for defending the honor I’ve long built up over the years in my place…”
“No pro, Sara!”
*clap!* *clap!* *clap!*
“While there were plenty of amateurish performances displayed by both you and your fickle feathered mother, for a first bout it certainly wasn’t the worst it could have been.”
“Mother! So what you’re saying is--”
“Mhm. This will make a fine initial testament to cross-cultural battle tactics, and how the two species exchanging data in this way can help innovate jousts in this new world order. Consider your bet won, Centorea.”
“Hooray! Papi’s sooooo happy!”
*bounce!* *quake!* *SNAP!!!*
“…ah…oops…”
“ *sigh* If there’s one thing I don’t miss about my old body it’s THAT.”
Laughing to themselves at their head swapped realities, Papi let Cerea ride her out of the athletic field proving not only as a valid means of transport, but also a newly minted bond of friendship.
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
EPILOGUE
“These carrots are pretty good! Yet I’m kind of sad they aren’t the best thing ever any more…”
“Aww, don’t feel bad Sara! You can always give Papi some to eat if you’d like!”
“Me said before that new bird body meant long, hard, thick thing would be less tasty to horsie friend.”
“Hush, you. My finances are weeping enough as it is at the state of YOUR loss…”
The four of them were doing a snack tour at the farmer’s market on behalf of Papi’s hard earned victory.
“Still, what could have caused every harpy and centaur to swap heads at the exact same time? The logistics don’t line up…”
“Hey horse ladies. This just hunch, but you know about Mayfight Shavings, right?”
“Perchance you mean Daylights Savings? …What are you implying with that statement?”
“Papi knows about that! It’s when time falls backwards one hour! Could it be…that when time switched over, so did everyone’s heads too?”
It somehow wasn’t inherently implausible. The worldwide head swap HAD happened overnight at Sunday’s dawn, right as Daylight Savings would have struck.
“Exactly! As expected of clever girl who fought me expertly! Daughter agrees?”
“Don’t get cocky; that sort of fight would be a footnote had we not all swapped heads, right Centorea?”
“……”
“……”
“Girls?”
“Are you quite alright?”
“…yes mother, I’m doing well. Thank you for your concern towards Centorea and I.”
“Cerea thinks so too! Pepper’s the best fighter ever for winning against her mommy!”
Thus the world-shattering debacle was shelved silently. Had Papi and Cerea grown too close to the truth of the matter? Or was there something nastier afoot? The strings of fate flickered faintly outside the confines of reality, glimmering a new shade in response to the stimuli of their eldritch purpose…